ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Arrrrrgh

When we opened yesterday afternoon, my volunteer came flying in the door flipping out that someone in the community was going to open a rival youth center across town (less than a 1/2 mile away) to put "me" out of business. Mind you, my volunteer was *way* overreacting, but still....This person is a parent of 2 kids who come to our youth center, was once very active in our project, and thinks that our youth center is way too strict and that kids "need a place to act like kids." Our rules are actually fairly reasonable (Respect the staff, each other, and the equipment, don't make out with your girlfriend, don't scream obscenities across the room, etc) and we don't let kids skateboard inside the building because of liability reasons.

So now, on top of battling a group of people who think we don't do enough with these kids, I've got opposition telling me that I expect too much of these kids.

Anyway, this guy wants to open a youth center in a much bigger building, allow kids to skateboard, have arcade games and let the kids do whatever they want. And, to make it even better, he has his kids telling all the other students about how cool its gonna be, and how they're opening in less than two weeks, and how "I'm" totally going to be out of business. What mostly bothers me is that this guy keeps referring to me by name, and talking about putting me out of work and stuff. It's bizarre.

What the heck is wrong with my town?
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-03-02 07:59:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

As funny as this is going to sound my FiL swears it works. He was getting really bad leg cramps at night and found out somewhere that a bar of soap helps. Can't remember if there is a specific kind it has to be, but he says he hasn't be woken up by leg cramps since.

I dunno if it will work with charlie horses.


I remember reading that on snopes at some point. I'm gonna try to get my potassium levels back up and make sure I'm hydrated this weekend too....hopefully that will help :)
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-26 10:54:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
I swear I'm going to gnaw my leg off if it doesn't stop hurting!

I had compartmental syndrome in my lower leg (about an inch above my ankle) about 10 years ago. I had a series of muscle relaxer injections, two surgeries (4" scar on my leg!), and various air casts/splints/crutches/etc. Right after the last surgery, I tore the scar tissue training for my softball team, and wound up back in physical therapy (and benched for the season). From that point on, my leg has been gradually regaining feeling...I can feel most of my leg except for maybe 2-3" in either direction from the area the surgery was in.

Unfortunately, as the feeling has been coming back into my foot and ankle area, I've been getting these god awful charlie horses in the middle of the night right at the site of the surgery on my leg. They're so painful I wind up waking up Spoom (even when I try not to), and I can't rely on my foot and leg to work properly during these spells (so I can't "walk it off" like I used to do with charlie horses). I had two of these spells last night.

So much pain, so little sleep! I think I'm just frustrated today because I'm tired, but I needed to vent.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-26 10:20:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
vent of the day:

I have the flu. This is the second day I've been feeling really miserable, getting sick, and running a fever. Yesterday, I had to make over an hour's worth of phone calls to close the youth center. Today, I don't have that option (we can't be closed two days in a row). I've tried calling every member of the board, to no avail. The one I could get ahold of won't run it on his own, he wants someone else there. While I appreciate that, I also do this job BY MYSELF EVERY FREAKING DAY.

Yay for working with teenagers while running a fever and running to a trashcan. What the hell good am I doing anyone today?!
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-18 12:53:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

"Did you bring this snow with you?"
-Yes I've lived here for two years now and have kept this storm hidden in my closet with my beaver pelts and mukluks.



:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-12 10:25:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

Oh Scooter :( Sorry to hear that. Sometimes people are just so unreasonable. And what do they think will happen if the youth center closes, huh? *HUGS*


I think they're hoping that if we close, the kids will all disappear. Like, suddenly their home lives will improve and mom will be home baking cookies after school everyday and everything will be perfect and happy. Their major complaint is that the youth center "draws local kids into town". I wasn't aware that was a BAD thing, per se...but the kids would be in town anyway. On middle school nights, I see high schoolers roaming all over town and vice versa.

What they seem to forget is that about 3 years ago - just before we opened - NO ONE from the neighborhood was able to use the local laundramat because the teenagers had adopted it as their hangout. They harassed the older people, cussed out young mothers, stole clothes, food, etc. from people who tried to interrupt their fun. The owner finally called the police because he lost so much business. What exactly do they think they're going to improve by closing down the ONE place the kids have to hang out?

That's horrible ScooterMac! I think it's time for a community meeting...whether it be at the school board meeting, an open meeting...better yet, call the local paper and have them do "human interest" article for the local paper outlining all the good the Centre does? Bet those doing the dissing, will have egg on their face....


All of the outspokenness by the "group" has happened either via letters to the editor in the local paper or at public school board meetings. When I went in to renew my service contract with the school at a meeting, I had to sit there and listen to 4 or 5 different people stand up during the public comments and rail against the youth center and what we do. They insist their tax money shouldn't support it, that the school should have nothing to do with it, and that it should be closed. They also say that I'm misrepresenting our numbers, both daily and overall amt. of students registered. The local paper has done many articles (Our two-week elementary summer park program, our cereal collection drive, the health kits for Haiti, our Youth Council group, etc), but they're right alongside letters to the editor from this group and generally get shoved to the back pages. I've asked for space for a weekly youth center column, and they won't give it to me.

I'm just frustrated by all of it.

Edited by ScooterMac, 12 February 2010 - 10:23 AM.

ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-12 10:19:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Vent of the day:

There's apparently a "group" of people set out to get the youth center de-funded and closed. It started with one or two people who had a problem with us, and they keep spreading lies and rumors and half-truths to get more people into their "group". This crew includes our district superintendent's secretary, the head of the teacher's union, a former school board member, the police chief's wife, etc....WHAT THE F#*$& PEOPLE?! It's a freakin youth center, not a bomb silo! The kids come in, do homework, eat, play games, and hang out. We're almost always in the middle of some outreach program (making health kits for Haiti atm) and do community service projects when it's warm out.

and some guy I've never met stood up at the last school board meeting and announced he has a "spy" who is one of the students, who comes in every day and reports to him how many kids are there and how many students are new vs. returning students (Gosh, I bet if you go to band practice, they have the same kids everyday too! *duh*) and that I was being closely monitored.

Y'know what? They don't pay me enough for any of this #######.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-12 08:50:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
My vent is mainly that my honeymoon is over and I'm back at my 12-hour workday.

<--needs moar jacuzzi.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-02-01 09:20:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

"BRAND NEW VENT"

Seriously...what type of parent assures their child that they will be at the Greyhound Bus Depot to pick them up and drive them back to the town where they both live, which is two hours away and not on said bus route.....AND THEN NOT SHOW UP..OR ANSWER THEIR PHONE, OR RESPOND TO MESSAGES?????????

yup....my Ex-Husband!! unfruckingbeleivable!!!!!


:o

That's horrifying! I hope they were able to get home alright!
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-19 07:54:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

Well, the dude authored his own misery.


So true. For so many reasons. :thumbs:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-14 13:12:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

Dude hasn't had a long-term job for quite a while now because there are classes of jobs he considers "beneath him". He wants to get hired as a supervisor or manager, and nothing less... or at least, that's his excuse for not working.


Well, that....

And, he considers drug testing to be a violation of his rights and refuses to work for an employer that drug tests (and even Wal-Mart and McDonalds drug test in that city).
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-14 13:08:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-14 12:18:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

No...it was really rather naughty and inappropriate, I assure you!


All the more reason! :whistle:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-14 12:01:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

She was like a bridezilla and she wasn't even the bride.


With 9 days to go, I officially have a "momzilla" :lol:

I know that he's having trouble adapting to me having a new lifestyle. I'm doubtful he'll come around...he has very high demands of his friends, and if he feels ignored he throws a temper tantrum and sends e-mails like these. He was actually MAD that I invited him out to breakfast on Sunday morning when I was in town last weekend. He said he didn't have money, and then hinted that he'd go if I'd pay. I told him I didn't have the money to cover him, and he invited us over after breakfast. We showed up and called his phone several times as well as his roommate's phone, and no answer. We went to my brother's house instead, where I fell asleep. When I woke up, I had a text telling me he was going to bed because he didn't feel well, and a voicemail b*tching at me because I'd invited him out for breakfast knowing he didn't have any money. His closing line was "Well, I'm about to drive over to [restaurant] and get some lunch, so I guess I'll talk to you whenever". The restaurant he went to for lunch cost more than the place we went to for breakfast! :angry:

I'm more or less over it at this point, many of our mutual friends have told me they've gotten letters from him like that too, and that he's being really self-centered, and not to blame myself. I'm excited that my friends start showing up a week from today to get ready for the wedding :thumbs:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-14 09:50:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
I make friends pretty easily, and haven't had a whole lot of issues with it. I've had maybe 3 or 4 former friends with whom a friendly relationship is no longer possible, but we're still civil to each other in public. I'm even still friends with most of my ex-boyfriends.

I was blessed, during college, to be part of a very awesome "family" of friends. These were people who I could call at 4am and tell them I was 2 hours away with a broken down car, and they'd be there to pick me up in about 2 hours and 15 minutes :) 8 years later, 16 will be in attendance at our wedding (two had work-related excuses, and we lost one of our crew about two years ago)...and many of them are driving several hours or flying in. While I'm sad that this one friend has decided to exclude himself, I can't overlook how lucky I am to have so many people who care about me.

This guy was a good friend when we worked together, were both single, and could spend all our time goofing off and hanging with other friends or going out for drinks after work. We worked together at a callcenter (I was a supervisor, he was a trainer) and we've lived together a few times. Fortunately (for me, at least) I grew up, graduated college, found my dream guy, found my dream job, moved to another state, and now have a whole new pile of obligations. He's worked off and on since we left the callcenter, but usually with large gaps of unemployment between his jobs. He's divorced, his daughter's on the other side of the country, he's sleepin on someone's couch, and he's broke....I know he's depressed, but he refuses to do anything to change his life, including getting counseling or a job. We just grew apart because we're living different lives, and I was willing to acknowledge that...but dang, he said some mean stuff in his e-mail =\
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-14 08:14:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

There is a was a whole article about this in Chatelaine last month - the friendship thing when your life is changing, getting married, having kids, moving, changing jobs whatever. I don't normally read magazines because basically they are just a bunch of ads, and since you probably don't have last month's Chatelaine this is not helpful. :hehe:


I tried to search for it online, but couldn't find it. I found the site for the magazine, but not the article you were talking about :)

He moved away in Aug. 08, for work, which transferred him through several states before firing him. He's now back in Ohio, where we both were before he left. He isn't working (though he's looking) and has no family in the area to keep him busy. I think he's mostly bored, and he's annoyed I don't have time to entertain him. I moved back to my hometown in Oct. 08, and have settled back into family/church/community obligations that I love, but take up a decent amount of time. Last year, when he was working, he'd get mad if I called too often (I was alone in a "new" area and Spoom wasn't here yet). Now that he's not working and I'm still working, he's mad because I don't call often enough. Can't win for losing with this guy!

I've ALWAYS been overscheduled and busy - to the point that Spoom and I have an "off-night" scheduled once a week where we stay in and do nothing. Actually, the friend was informed that I wouldn't be available on that night, and then called anyway and got mad when I couldn't talk because I was helping make dinner. I've tried to work out times when I know I can call, but he doens't want to schedule out time to talk - it should be spontaneous, otherwise it's a chore. :blink:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-13 12:46:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

Maybe he had a secret crush on you and resents the fact that you moved away and will be getting married?

Just a thought. Lots of guys out there harbor secret affections and cover them with a guise of "friendship only", just so they can be close to you in case something happens to your current relationship.

I'm not saying that's the case here, but I've seen it several times.


It's not the case here, though that happened with another friend of mine. Just before Spoom proposed, a dear friend of mine spent about an hour and a half pleading and begging me to believe that I was meant to be with him and not Spoom. Needless to say, it didn't go well for him. Though, like I said, that's not the case here, he's just a drama queen.

Now that's a thought Wyatt! Hmmm, I wonder...


Wonder no more....he's not interested in chicks. He came out several years ago.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-13 11:35:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

Just sounds like he's really hurt. Sometimes when we're hurting, it's really easy to say nasty things, things we truly regret later. No doubt you're busy with everything going on in your life, and we'd HOPE that our friends would realize that and cut us some slack. Obviously this person is a little insecure, as well as feeling really left out. After the wedding is done and you're back to "normal" (whatever that means eh?) you can try and reconnect, if the relationship is important to you, and while it'll never be the same, you can perhaps forge a new one. He might or might not be interested in that, and if not...if he wants it exactly how it was, then you'll have to decide if you can do that, or if you'll have to let it go...


The thing that gets me is that we've done everything to keep him from being left out. He was going to be a groomsman in the wedding, but decided a month ago that he couldn't keep that obligation. He assured me, though, that he was going to be at the wedding come hell or high water. When I saw him Saturday, that was still the case. I'd arranged a ride for him, and found a place he could stay without having to pay anything. Short of sending him a cash prize for attending our wedding, I couldn't have made him less "left out". He's choosing to leave himself out....and, as several friends have pointed out to me in the last day or so, that's his loss.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-13 08:13:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

I had to end a friendship with my college best friend (and maid of honor at my wedding) because she was displaying passive-agressive behavior towards me (i.e. unfriended me on facebook TWICE, writing overly friendly wall postings on my other best girlfriend's wall while ignoring mine entirely, didn't invite me to her B-day, etc) and was overly critical with my hubby.

Well, there's more--subtle bickering during girls' vacation to Calgary & Vegas, cuminating to being dis-invited from her Hawaii destination wedding...AFTER I PAID for flights and hotel already. I can pinpoint when her behavior started: around the time hubby and I got engaged back in Summer 2007.

I was so hurt and sad--I grieved for a couple months, then ended the relationship last November. I haven't spoke to her since. :(


Yeah...I mean, I don't know what this guy expected of me. I've been trying to talk to him here and there when I had a few minutes, but he said we weren't talking long enough to "connect" and he's hurt when I have to get off the phone and forget to call him back. It's not like I'm intentionally ignoring him or screening his calls - I don't get cell phone reception at either job (so pretty much from 7am - 7pm), and I don't usually get home until 9 or so, then we eat and I fall asleep on the couch :lol: I have to set reminders in my phone to do everything, because I'm so overscheduled and busy. I've tried to explain to him that as people grow, friendships change. We may not be the kind of friends who call each other 47 times a day and talk about OMG EVERYTHING!, but that doesn't mean we're not still friends or even that we're not still close - just that we're grown ups with our own lives to lead.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do about the whole thing. I asked him for times when he would be available where I could carve a half hour or so out of my schedule to call and just talk to him undistracted, but he replied with some snarky comeback about how my life is so busy that he's sure I won't have time. Then he tells me that he misses me and wants me to be his best friend again. I don't understand how those two sentences follow each other.

:bonk:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-13 07:46:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Vent of the day:

A groomsman, who was the first of my friends to meet Spoom, stepped out of his role as a groomsman about a month ago stating financial concerns. We were sad he wouldn't be able to be in the wedding, but found a replacement for him.

Yesterday, he sent me a message on facebook (?!) telling me that since I can't talk to him for at least a half hour 2-3+ times a week, my effort in our friendship is subpar and that he won't be attending the wedding. Basically, he friendship-broke-up with me over facebook. Lamezilla. I explained to him that right now I'm working a 12 hour a day job 5-6 days a week, planning a 200+ person wedding, and that I have familial, community, and church obligations after my 12 hour workday ends. My bridal shower was 2 weeks ago, and we haven't even opened stuff yet because I haven't been home enough to do so. I'm frustrated with the whole situation - some of my best friends and I don't speak for weeks at a time, because we know the other is busy with life and relationships and children, etc. - that's just how life goes. Friends don't need to know what the other person ate for lunch, y'know?

Then, one of my bridesmaids called me and told me she'd totalled her car in a really bad wreck. She's okay and her kid's okay, but the car isn't and she's not old enough to rent one.

*facepalm*

Edited by ScooterMac, 12 January 2010 - 10:18 AM.

ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-12 10:16:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Venty vent vent:

Why is it that everyone seems to think I have nothing better to do for three or so days leading up to my wedding than entertain them and host them at my house?! Spoom and I visited our friends this weekend, and I was shocked how many of them either asked if they could (or better, two of them informed me that they were) stay with us Thurs/Fri/Sat/Some combination thereof. As it currently stands, we're in a 2 bedroom apartment, and we had 4 out-of-town guests planning on staying with us (Spoom's best man and his girlfriend, who's one of my bridesmaids, and my two brothers).

I've been informing them, as I have been all along, that there's a 35-50/night motel next to the church and that we can't put anyone else in our apartment. The reactions have not been pretty.

Is it wrong to want semi-sanity the last few days before the wedding? Am I obligated to find someplace for all these people? If I tried to accomodate all the people who've asked/informed me that they were staying with us, we'd be looking at 12+ people in a two bedroom with an OLD water heater and crappy well water.

<--goes crazy.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-11 11:37:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois

So I`m on hold with RBC USA cause I still haven`t gotten my card n stuff yet... and they`re playing Christmas hold music... isn`t it like January 5th?


Maybe they celebrate Orthodox Christmas (1/7) :lol:
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2010-01-05 12:37:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Boiling water doesn't do much for ours....we have so much rust in the water that it's brown. Bleh.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-30 08:14:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Rhiann @ Dec 29 2009, 12:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This is kind of a silly vent, but oh well tongue.gif

My parents were the kind of people who stopped buying me video games when I turned 13.
For years and years I bugged them about getting a Gameboy Advance and they kept telling me no.
I emailed them on Sunday to say Happy Anniversary and my mom emailed back talking about stuff and to tell me...

They bought a Wii.

Oh sure, buy yourself something but don't let me have a simple hand held gaming device laughing.gif


Not really vent-y, but semi-related:

When I was a kid, I HATED the taste of well water. I begged and begged and begged to get a filter, or culligan water, or ANYTHING other than well water. My parents kept telling me our water was fine and that I just needed to get used to it.

Right after I left home (about 8 years ago), my parents started buying filtered water...FOR THEIR DOG. Didn't I feel special!
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-29 15:36:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Rhiann @ Dec 28 2009, 01:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Did you guys print out the memo avaliable on the forums here?
It explains something along the lines that K-1s are able to work once they get an EAD, etc etc. I took it with me but they never questioned my K-1 visa.


Do you know where that's at? I tried searching, but can't seem to find it.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-28 15:30:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Danu @ Dec 28 2009, 03:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
lucky for you, K1s are eligable to work, you just need to apply for an EAD to do so, so you are able to get a SSN. Its just that a lot of the people at the SSN are stupid. Here is your link, print it off and take it with you! (it says K1s are allowed to work with the proper authorization card.

https://secure.ssa.g.../lnx/0100203500

Hope I helped a bit.



The thing is, he doens't have eligibility to work. You can't file for the EAD (unless I've *really* missed something) until after you're married and have filed the AOS paperwork. Right?


ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-28 15:14:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Rob and Mel @ Dec 28 2009, 12:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The Social Security Administration is a federal department, how can a state law, ie the Pennsylvania requisite that you can't get a SSN without proof that you need one, superced federal laws? You can get a SSN in any state and the regulations are federally standardized. The only restriction that I can think of is regarding replacement cards.


There's some catch with it - You can't apply for a SSN without being able to show eligibility to work. Since he's down here on a K-1, he's not eligible to work. They need something documenting why he would need it, from what I've understood. If I'm wrong, I would *love* to see the link, it would make me breathe a lot easier!
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-28 12:53:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Arrrrgh @ our local courthouse. I've tried calling their # at least 5 times, and it seems as though no one's in. In PA, you're supposed to have a SSN to get a marriage liscense, but you can't get the SSN unless you have proof you need it (ie, a letter from the courthouse). The courthouse is about 45 minutes away, and I work the entire time it's open, every day.

Come ON. I just want ONE easy thing in this whole process.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-28 11:27:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
my vent for the day is that the day needs to be longer.

I'm up at 6 to get ready for work, at work by 7ish.
Leave morning job at 1:30-1:45 and get to afternoon job by 2-2:30
Leave afternoon job at 6 or 7 depending on the day
Packing, moving, cleaning, wedding stuff, etc. until like 10, unless I have a meeting or the odd night off
Dinner, Crash and repeat.

Blehhh...C'mon, Jan. 23. You can't get here soon enough.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-21 13:11:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
And speaking of bullies.....[aka vent of the day]

We caught the kid who engraved out desk, and he's out for a week and serving community service when he's allowed back in to work off the damage he did.

Alas, some other student decided to be a jerk and write "F(#& YOU" and "B17(#" all over our bathroom walls in crayon. The finishing touch though is that the kiddo dumped hand soap (clear, of course) all over the bathroom floor. So, when someone (you know, like me) walks into the bathroom, they fall and smash their head on the doorframe. This is the second time someone coated our bathroom floor in a slippery substance with the direct intent of causing personal harm, and both time it's been me that's fallen. I've about had it with this job! (and DANG does my back/shoulder/ankle (twisted it when I slipped) and head hurt!)
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-16 07:59:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (DeadPoolX @ Dec 15 2009, 08:23 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So... I was talking with a friend from the U.S. and she's having some bullying problems with her kid (he's being bullied, not doing the bullying). I assumed she was asking me what to do since I was bullied -- both psychologically and physically -- for years. It seemed in the end she didn't want my advice after hearing it.

What did I tell her? I said her kid needs to break the bully's nose.

It's true, too. Bullies don't listen to reason and they certainly don't care about whose feelings they hurt. Bullies DO understand violence and that works. I know it did for me.


The problem with teaching the bullied student to retaliate is that it often winds up with both students in detention, off school for suspension, or serving community service for fighting. The kid who was the victim to begin with is now just as guilty as the other party, even though he was provoked. That's how schools and our local PD handle it, anyway. We've had a lot of problems with kids in fights lately - including one where a 13 year old girl took a rock to the head of a 14 year old girl, resulting in 6 stitches (for the girl who was hit with the rock) and a couple days in the hospital (for the one that hit her), and they're both serving community service and both looking at the possiblity of spending several months in juvie lockup.

At our youth center, we're very aware of which kids are bullies and which kids are bullied. Our high school mentors and our adult volunteers have been through "bully awareness" training, and intervene when the adults are out of eyesight. The students also have mini-lectures throughout the year on various topics, including bullying. We've had a few parents come in to express concerns about their students being around so-and-so, because he's a bully, and we've handled those situations. Whenever a parent or student comes to our staff to report bullying, we sit down with the alleged bully and make sure he understands that 1) s/he IS being a bully or exhibiting bullying behaviors (you'd be amazed how many of these kids are raised thinking their behavior is acceptable and okay, because their parents as bullies as well), 2) that these behaviors are unacceptable, 3) hands/feet and insults need to be kept to yourself, and 4) that they will be out of the program for a week (to a 12 year old, a week is forever) if they continue their behavior. After that, most of them come around. The ones that don't get kicked out. Any of my staff/volunteers/mentors can report incidents of bullying to me, and I handle it as the situation calls for. We are in close communication with the school, and we have a two-way flow of information as it regards to bullies. We don't catch everyone, but we do the best we can. The last thing I want is for kids to stop coming to the youth center because the other kids made it hell for them.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-16 07:54:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Varba @ Dec 15 2009, 08:56 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think sometimes they do things like that because their parents/guardians have never forced them to clean up their own destruction.

I know when I was growing up, if I acted out, I knew full well that after I was punished I was cleaning up anything I did.


The board members are sanding down the desk before other students see it - tonight's middle school night, and I don't need the 6th graders thinking it's cool or funny or even remotely okay.

The kids at the youth center are required to clean up their own mess. They try to weasel out of it, but I usually know who was sitting where, and send them back to clean up their tables. We also have kids serving community service (for fighting, having ciggarettes in school, fighting, drugs, curfew violations...did I mention fighting?) with us on a regular basis, so they tend to clean up anything that the other kids missed.

A lot of the kids we get are "At-risk" students whose parents aren't around after school. A lot of these kids are from low income, single parent environments where it's impossible for them to be properly supervised....that's why they come to the youth center. It's a drop-in program, but the kids know there's stuff to do and it's warm and their friends are there. There's also food, that's a big draw smile.gif Unfortunately, that means I spend as much or more time correcting "problem" behaviors as I do hanging out with the good kids. We've seen some great progress with some of the kids, but others are just pains. We can kick them out, and we do, but they just come back a day/week later with the same attitude, only upped a notch because they've been gone a week. Plus, kicking a kid out for a week or longer more or less makes them a hero to everyone else, because obviously it's cool to get kicked out of the one place your community gives you to hang out.

mad.gif
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-15 09:19:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
Additional vent:

WHAT THE HECK PEOPLE?! QUIT DYING! Another of my classmates from High School died of a heart attack, just read his obituary. This is my 3rd friend in the last few years to die of a heart attack, all under the age of 25. Our graduating class was just under 100, and we're down to around 90 now. Jeez sad.gif
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-15 08:42:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Varba @ Dec 11 2009, 05:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My mom was friends with a guy who's parents actually named him Jack Frost.


My ex-bf's grandmother's name was Mary Christmas. Her family would call the nursing home to speak with her, and new employees who hadn't learned the resident's names yet would always think it was a prank call and hang up on them. laughing.gif I've also met a boy named Sue, and went to school with a kid named Harry #######.

My vent of the day: mad.gif

I work with kids, and as such I hear a lot of grumbled insults. Those don't really bother me, because teenagers are supposed to be sort of grumbly and angsty, and I'm just the nearest adult to blame for life being difficult (particularly when I enforce rules like "Don't throw shoes" and "pool sticks aren't weapons!"). Well, last week a bunch of our kids got kicked off the church bus that picks them up (some of them go from our youth center to a church youth group) for smoking on the bus. Then I find two new (fist-size) holes in our walls in various places throughout our building. Then one of my kids got really mouthy with one of my volunteers. REALLY mouthy.

All of that led up to yesterday, when I had to deal with an irate parent, a really angry member of our board of directors, and had a roomfull of insanity (teens). As I was cleaning up at the end of the day, thinking how nice it was to have a quiet room again, I noticed a scratched portion of one of the computer desks. I moved the mousepad and keyboard to investigate and there in 2" tall letters was engraved "SCOOTER IS A CVNT" (Obviously, it was my real name and not Scooter, but meh).

I am not amused. Kids are losing computer privs. until someone coughs up a name. Insult me all you want, but don't destroy our property while you're at it.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-15 08:29:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Ravenesque @ Dec 9 2009, 11:08 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Sprailenes @ Dec 9 2009, 05:54 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'd like to vent about the cleaning lady again! biggrin.gif

So NJ cleared the gay marriage cleared the state Senate. She comes in today to ask me if I have read the papers. I told her yes. Then she proceeds to tell me how she knows people "like that" and how they act like they're "happy" and then says: "I think they'd be happier if they were normal!"

Ugh. Some people. So I asked her: "Well I think they should be allowed to marry, how does what they do affect you?" and she just looked at me and said: "Its gross and I have to look at it when they do it!" really? Do they have sex in front of you? Do you rent gay porn? How do you have to look at it every day? Because I have lived here for over 2 years and I have never had to "look at it".

Seriously? I don't even have the words. I was so annoyed and she knew it, so she just walked away.


LMAO @ "I have to look at it when they do it!"

Yah, those gays be doing it everywhere...in the supermaket, at the bank, on the streets...LOL.


When we were printing out our friends invitation envelopes for the wedding, my parents (who are fairly conservative) noticed that a few were addressed to two females or two males. My mom made some comment about how nice it was that we could just put roommate's names on the same envelope. Spoom and I kinda looked at each other, and I explained that I had several friends who were gay, and that we were inviting them and their SO's to the wedding. My dad kinda "harumph"d from his chair and made some comment about how they'd "better not flaunt their gayness" at my wedding.

I asked him what would constitute "flaunting" their homosexuality - holding hands? dancing together? kissing?

He wouldn't answer me, and wouldn't continue with the conversation. My wedding should be entertaining, at least smile.gif
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-09 11:27:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
It sounds that way....her argument against gay marriage sounds about as well thought out as the one given by the 11 year old boys that come to the youth center. "Ewwww, it's yucky!"
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-09 09:13:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Sprailenes @ Dec 9 2009, 08:54 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'd like to vent about the cleaning lady again! biggrin.gif

So NJ cleared the gay marriage cleared the state Senate. She comes in today to ask me if I have read the papers. I told her yes. Then she proceeds to tell me how she knows people "like that" and how they act like they're "happy" and then says: "I think they'd be happier if they were normal!"

Ugh. Some people. So I asked her: "Well I think they should be allowed to marry, how does what they do affect you?" and she just looked at me and said: "Its gross and I have to look at it when they do it!" really? Do they have sex in front of you? Do you rent gay porn? How do you have to look at it every day? Because I have lived here for over 2 years and I have never had to "look at it".

Seriously? I don't even have the words. I was so annoyed and she knew it, so she just walked away.


Your cleaning lady stories make me glad I clean my own office smile.gif I think she and I might've had a really nasty conversation.
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-09 09:03:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
I would like to vent about my own stupidity:

So this morning I get ready, put on my jacket and head out for work. As I leave the house, both our apartment door and the main door lock behind me. We're in the middle of a huge windstorm (complete with thunder, lightning, hail, sleet, a little snow, and icy roads) and I, like a moron, wore a hoodie instead of my jacket. Upon reaching the car, I went to grab the keys out of my pocket and discovered them missing. Okay, not really missing, just upstairs. No big deal, I think, I'll just call Spoom to let me in. Well, the phone rings and rings (both our house phone and our land line) and I don't know which doorbell is ours outside yet. My only option is to wake up my grandparents, who live in the downstairs apartment in the house, and borrow their key to the upstairs apartment. Then I realize, I don't know their new number (it was just changed recently). So I call my mom (also my boss) at work, and get my grandparents' phone number. They get up, let me in and grab the extra key to my apartment....

I made it to work after that without incident, but BOY did I feel stupid this morning.

Dear brain,

Wake the heck up!

kthx biggrin.gif

ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-09 07:56:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Sam and Ben @ Dec 7 2009, 10:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't get stars.. I do get a slight blue hue to everything I see out of my left eye about an hour before a migraine is triggered.

Happens far too often for my liking.



QUOTE (Malrothien @ Dec 7 2009, 11:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I've been lucky, my migraines stopped happening out of nowhere. I was having one almost every other day at one point. Dark room and sleep was the only solution. sad.gif


Mine stopped too....but after I hit my head really hard in a car wreck. Maybe it jolted something back into place? laughing.gif When I got the aura part of it, it was often flashing lines in my field of vision, or my vision would blur out in one (and on one occasion, both) of my eyes. I had the aura-puking-photophobic-dizzy kinda migraines for a year or so, probably every other day to once a week. After the wreck, the migraines went away, but my panic attacks returned. In retrospect, I'll take the migraines.

Edited by ScooterMac, 08 December 2009 - 08:04 AM.

ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-08 08:03:00
CanadaThe Vent - Part Trois
QUOTE (Krikit @ Dec 3 2009, 01:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (ScooterMac @ Dec 3 2009, 01:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The thing is, no one seems willing to work with me. The chiropractors I've spoken with get concerned when I mention it's an old injury and tell me I should be seeing my regular doctor. My regular doctor doesn't seem concerned that it's an old injury and keeps telling me it'll get better when I lose weight (I've already lost over 100lbs). So yeah....pain.

That's weird. Mine's a very old injury but I've never had anyone not want to look after it. unsure.gif

Congrats on losing the 100lbs! Wow. That is awesome.


I think it's mostly because it was never really treated. I was in a lot of pain for several months after I got kicked, and it finally either became the new normal or eased up enough that I could tolerate it for a number of years. It'll flare up here and there, but this new round of pain is crazy and intense - nothing like the other flare ups (then again, I wasn't carrying furniture the other times either).
ScooterMacFemaleCanada2009-12-03 13:31:00