ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaHanging with the boys
Ok someone tell me with this hanging with the boyz is about. It is driving me crazy. I hear hey baby I love you i am hanging with the boyz playing dominos or i am listening to music with the boyz. What is that about. I mean ya we talk everyday several times a day but y cant he drop everything when i call why does he have to hang with the boyz.

Sorry for gripping but i think if i here hanging with the boyz again i am going to scream. Why cant he drop everything to talk when i call. I stop what i am doing to talk with him GRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrr! mad.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-15 03:48:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
JaLove your pictures are beautiful. Ya'll make a cute couple
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-23 23:16:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 23 2007, 05:12 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Oct 23 2007, 12:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 23 2007, 02:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Oct 23 2007, 07:46 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>


this is a old school pic....it is 3 years old....i haven't gotten our wedding pics on the computer yet...i know i should....


Oh this is such a cute picture!! You must be really tall cause isnt your husband the super tall guy?

yup....he is 6'7-6'8 depending on the day and i am about 5'11


Good lord! yall make me look like a midget!


Hey I am 4'11" to 5' what does that make me sad.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-23 23:11:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
<a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i242.photobuc...1/DSCF0104.jpg" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i242.photobuc...1/DSCF0102.jpg" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i242.photobuc...1/DSCF0093.jpg" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i242.photobuc...1/DSCF0064.jpg" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a>


I hope this worked.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-23 23:06:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (clairern @ Oct 23 2007, 01:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 23 2007, 12:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
SLEEPY AND AT MARGARITAVILLE


AT FIANCE HOUSE


FOR U TRICIA smile.gif


Girl; you both look so good together. Did he receive the visa yet? When does he plan on forwarding?

I learned something new in JA lastg week. Men do not say me sons come. They say me soon forward. LOL They don't want to say come (CUM) Ha! Ha! Ha!



laughing.gif laughing.gif laughing.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-23 22:55:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 23 2007, 09:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**********TUESDAY CHUCKLE**********

Have a blessed day, Guys!! Don't forget to find time within your busy day just to laugh...it's good for the heart, soul and spirit!!

Love ya heart.gif,
Gill

Jamaican Hell




A man dies and goes to hell. He discovers that there are different Hells for each country.

First he goes to the German Hell and asks what they do there. "First, they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for an hour. Then the German Devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day." He doesn't like this so he moves on.

He goes to the U.S. Hell, the Canadian Hell, and the U.K. Hell, and discovers that they are all the same.

Finally, he comes across a very long line of people waiting to get in and asks,
"Which Hell is this?" Someone tells him, "Oh,This is the Jamaican Hell"
"What do they do in here?" He asks.
"Well, first they put you in an electric chair for an hour, then they lay you on a bed of nails for an hour, then the Jamaican Devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day!"

"But that is just like all the other Hells". The man said, " Why is the line so long?"

"Cause inna de Jamaican Hell, the electricity always lock off, the electric chair always naah work, sumbady tief di nail dem, and di Jamaican Devil a public servant, so he cum in an' punch him time card den go a Rum Bar fi play domino fi di rest a di day!"



That was fully as HELL!!!! laughing.gif Hello all smile.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-23 22:04:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 22 2007, 10:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Marie, you two are so cute!!! I love the bottom pic...

Yeah lets see more from everybody!!

Me and hubby on our makeshift honeymoon:


Ya'll are really cute together. I keep trying to post pictures of corey and i but they don't come out. whistling.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-22 22:48:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (NowMrs @ Oct 22 2007, 09:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Man, so much reading to catch up on! Phew! lol

Marie, I am so sorry for your loss, you and your family are in my prayers! heart.gif

Congrats Pam on the AOS and DL! good.gif

Nanny: Hot baby ultrasound!

Former ALienUkGirl: Your son is so precious!

Congrats on the recent approvals, reunions, and NOAs!

Mrs. Scott: Finally! Congrats to you and Mr. Scott, your interview will be a success!

Oh, and I am now NowMrs! Cute name thought of by Nagishkaw!

Marlon and I are doing great! I have just been so busy with both jobs and playing video games! hehe I am still waiting for the disc of my wedding photos but as soon as I get them I will post!

Lotsa love to my yardie VJ family!


Congrats NOWMRS. Tell us about the wedding.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-22 21:05:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Same with my husband.....never had dreads. And, some of the women on here are talking about hair braiding, so I know those are no.

OMG.........I have a hair story to tell you..........

Andre has been growing out his hair a bit lately. And, in between brushings for work, he was locking it a bit by twisting it between his fingers. Saturday, after I had worked all day, came home to have a drink and buzzing a little, he decides I need to take the electric razor and straighten up the lines around his face. I strongly argued against it; but in the end, I decided to try. Well, of course, I cut 2 curls off accidently on the one side and one on another. He threw a fit and ended up shaving it all off (after he made us laugh by shaving off just parts at a time). I told him it was his fault cause he got me all chilled out and then made me cut his hair. I don't think he will do that again.
[/quote]

laughing.gif laughing.gif laughing.gif Corey does not have dreds either

QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Oct 22 2007, 11:18 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>



So cute. What do you want girl or boy.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-22 19:10:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Hello all smile.gif Hopefully everyone is haing a great day.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-22 18:26:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 21 2007, 04:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 20 2007, 10:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I finally figured out how to do a signature now i just have to figure out how to put in pictures. LOL



nicky honey now all we need to do is fix ur timeline let me see if i can figure that out i can tell u what to do for the pictures but i have to look first


Hey JALOVE send me a message. My phone has gone bizerrk and i can't get a message to ya
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-21 21:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 21 2007, 04:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 20 2007, 10:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I finally figured out how to do a signature now i just have to figure out how to put in pictures. LOL



nicky honey now all we need to do is fix ur timeline let me see if i can figure that out i can tell u what to do for the pictures but i have to look first


I just cant get the AOS approved off. I try and try LOL
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-21 15:48:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (clairern @ Oct 21 2007, 08:31 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hey Ladies, Just a little joke to share. Enjoy!!!

Subject: Affairs

The 1st Affair

A married man was having an affair
with his secretary.

One day they went to her place
and made love all afternoon.
Exhausted, they fell asleep
and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed
and told his lover to take his shoes
outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.
He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
"I can't lie to you," he replied,
"I'm having an affair with my secretary.
We had sex all afternoon."

She looked down at his shoes and said:
"You lying #######!
You've been playing golf!"



The 2nd Affair

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters
but always talked about having a son.
They decided to try one last time
for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant
and delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery
to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child
he had ever seen.
He told his wife: "There's no way I can
be the father of this baby.
Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!
Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied:
"Not this time!"


The 3rd Affair

A mortician was working late one night.
He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz,
about to be cremated,
and made a startling discovery.


Schwartz had the largest private part
he had ever seen!


"I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," the mortician
commented, "I can't allow you to be cremated
with such an impressive private part.
It must be saved for posterity."

So, he removed it,
stuffed it into his briefcase,
and took it home

"I have something to show
you won't believe," he said to his wife,
opening his briefcase.

"My God!" the wife exclaimed,
"Schwartz is dead!"




The 4th Affair

A woman was in bed with her lover
when she heard her husband
opening the front door.

"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner."
She rubbed baby oil all over him,
then dusted him with talcum powder.

"Don't move until I tell you,"
she said, "pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired
as he entered the room.



"Oh it's a statue," she replied,
"the Smiths bought one and I liked it
so I got one for us, too."

No more was said,
not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up,
went to the kitchen and returned
with a sandwich and a beer.

"Here," he said to the statue, have this.
I stood like that for two days at the Smiths
and nobody offered me a damned thing."



The 5th Affair

A man walked into a cafe,
went to the bar and ordered a beer.
"Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent."

"One Cent?" the man exclaimed.
He glanced at the menu and asked:
"How much for a nice juicy steak
and a bottle of wine?"

"A nickel," the barman replied.
"A nickel?" exclaimed the man.
"Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The bartender replied:
"Upstairs, with my wife."
The man asked: "What's he doing upstairs
with your wife?"

The bartender replied:
"The same thing I'm doing
to his business down here."



The 6th Affair

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside
He looked up and said weakly:

"I have something I must confess."
"There's no need to, "his wife replied.

"No," he insisted,
"I want to die in peace.
I slept with your sister, your best friend,
her best friend, and your mother!"

"I know," she replied,
"now just rest and let the poison work."



laughing.gif laughing.gif laughing.gif laughing.gif That is to funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hello everyone. Hope your day is going great.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-21 14:12:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
I finally figured out how to do a signature now i just have to figure out how to put in pictures. LOL
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-20 21:52:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
I know what you mean. After leaving an abusive Ja man after being married for 13 years, I swore off JA men and marriage till I met Mike. I want nothing more than to have him here with me so we can get married and start our lives together. kicking.gif kicking.gif
[/quote]


I met Corey when i went to Jamaica with a friend who was adopting a child from there. My friend use to date his brother. Corey came to visit her and when I came out of the house it was love at first sight. I could not stop giggling and smiling at him. He kept looking at me and smiling. My friend was like ok are ya'll going to do that all day or are you going to say hello.

After that we were inseparable. I was only there for a week. I spent alot of time with him. When I returned to the United States we started talking on the phone everyday talking to each other. I went back to jamaica a month later. While I was there Corey asked me to marry him. I said yes. I met his family and they treated me like i belonged. When I came back to the US i was sick because i missed him so much. Don't get me wrong we still talk everyday sometimes 4 times a day.

It is funny because the day Corey asked me to marry him, he told me that he needed to go to the store and that he would be right back. He came back two hours later. I was so mad i yelled at him and walked into the bathroom. When I came out of the bathroom he was on one knee with a ring in his hand. I felt so bad. He said it took him so long because he was trying to find the perfect ring for me. sigh!!!!
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-20 20:47:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Hello all smile.gif hopefully everyones weekend is going well. I am working tons of fun.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-20 15:58:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Happy birthday good.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-19 17:11:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Sonshyne @ Oct 19 2007, 10:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif

Our AOS was approved yesturday and Neil finally got his CA drivers license!! kicking.gif I am so glad to be done with immigrations for awhile and now he can drive himself around dancin5hr.gif



yes.gif no0pb.gif yes.gif yes.gif Congrat's I am so happy for you
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-19 17:09:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Hello everyone. Marie i am sorry for your lost.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-19 16:54:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Wow well he's a good 4 years older than my husband. But I swear my huband is 50! He doesnt even have friends in their 20's. All his friends are 30something and older, even to the point where they could be our parents age!!
[/quote]


Corey is 28. He hangs out with older people also. I wonder what that is about. HE IS ALSO THE ONE WHO WANTS TO SAVE MONEY WHILE I AM A SPENDAHOLIC
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-19 02:48:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 18 2007, 08:38 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**********THURSDAY CHUCKLE************

Hang in there guys...we almost there biggrin.gif (Most of you have probably seen this one already, but it still cracks me up, hope it does the same for you! laughing.gif)
Enjoy heart.gif ,
Gill
********************************************************************************
*****************

De Crotchless Panties


This Jamaican woman felt that her love life was slipping because her husband had no more interest in sex. While shopping one day, she passed an adult shop and saw some crotchless panties, so she decided to buy one and try to use it to excite and seduce him.

That evening she took a long bath, put on a favorite perfume, and then she put on a sexy negligee and her new crotchless panties. Then she slithered into the room where her husband was watching TV as usual.

She stands right in front of him, with one foot resting high on the ottoman, negligee wide open, and whispers "yu wah some a dis?".

Her husband looks up at her wide-eyed and says. "No sah, yu mad, yuh nuh see wha it do to yu panty!"


laughing.gif laughing.gif laughing.gif That is so funny. Hello everyone hopefully your having a great day! This is my first day off in a month and i just don't know what to do with myself.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-18 13:09:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
I'm so glad I found this forum, I've been reading page after page and I just keep laughing and smiling. Its so nice to hear the good stories and jokes! good.gif
[/quote]

Me too. It helps pass the time. Everyone is great and very helpful. good.gif good.gif good.gif good.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 21:31:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 17 2007, 09:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 17 2007, 08:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Girl I am so scared I hate interviews. I just bought Corey a nice outfit but I don't know what I will wear. I hope our interview goes smothly. Please pray for us. wacko.gif wacko.gif



No Worries Nick,

You will be fine!! good.gif
yes.gif
Remember Who Jah Bless, NO MAN can curse and you are blessed...seen?

heart.gif,
Gill



Thank Gill,

Needed that. Sometimes i forget blush.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 20:51:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 17 2007, 07:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We go to the Embassy at about 6:30 there were about 15 people outside. We waited for the Embassy car park to open, then about 6:45 there were like 30 people outside, it was not too bad we walked up on the side on the right for those with 7am interviews that line went fast then 715 then 730.We were in right on time. Gaurd asked to see our paper. He asked who i was and then let us both in. Security checked through our bags,then we walked through the courtyard to the next door. A man was there behind a desk with another security agent giving a speech about what papers are needed to be signed, and to sign your police report then gave us a pink long slip and took the interview letter. We then went thru another securtity thing and entered in to section A. and sat down until our name was called and we seemed like we were playin musical chairs as someone got up the next person moved over smile.gif people were sitting there handwriting the forms that came in packet 3! some went up to the agent at section A and kept getting sent back to fill out things correctly.They called my fiance up he opens his folder and they say you seem to be very organized. She filled out a pink form checking off what we needed and in order so we went over to the side and put those papers in order and returned to the window. She asked me for job letter, tax returns and i handed her all the fincancial stuff she waved and said no more lol our file was the biggest one! its in a pink folder. She then said go to section B we went there sat down others were getting fingerprinted. Some were asked if they ever committed any crime or traveled anywhere out of the country. We got there the man asked who i was, i told him then he fingerprinted my fiance and sent us off to section C. As i was sitting in section B i was hearin WHO i wanted us to get to for the interview lady number 21 or 23 they sounded nice, helpful and cheery. So i say lets sent on the front row so i can hear. So all it all there were alot of families there with lots of children. About 3 got sent to get DNA test as they added the fathers name late. One guy was there with his daughter, she looked to be about 8-10 she says why did u take so long to do this what were u out of the country! were you DEAD! she was loud too everyone laugh. One lady got approve in like 2 min they didnt ask her nothing really. One guy was trying to adopt someone he raised but he had no proof of any kind to support his case he was gettin smart with the consular officer but she remain calm and said sir im really trying to help you here so calm down. She was very helpful with him. Did not witness any denials. One couple was up there over 30 minutes i dont know what happened with that. They called my fiances name and he jumped! lol they said his entire name over the loud speaker. So we go to the very last counter, 24. She says hello she asks who i am. We are both there smiling away at her looking pleasant. I say his fiance she says oh GREAT! so then she asks him if he has any form of sickness or illness, he says no. She asks has he ever committed any crime, he says no. She asks when did you meet and i answer Dec 30 we both kinda answered. She said how many times have u been here i say TEN... she says wow and smiles...She oh all this information in such short of time. Just this past Dec, she asks again...She had a hard time flipping over our heavy folder smile.gif Then says when will u get married so he says Dec 30th the day we met so she says awwwwww. She says to him you dont have 7 wives in another country do you. He laughs and says oh nooo. She pulls out the little pink small paper and says congratulations and then tells him where to go to airpak. I think thats all.



Girl I am so scared I hate interviews. I just bought Corey a nice outfit but I don't know what I will wear. I hope our interview goes smothly. Please pray for us. wacko.gif wacko.gif
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 19:50:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 17 2007, 07:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi everybody sorry for having u worry and lookin for me! busy busy two days im back and at work at that. Flight arrive 2 hours late for Newark and i had to get to work i got here late sad.gif I had intended on posting and calling last night but i found myself in the bushes eaten by all kind of bug and mosquito in the country got approve easy only like 2 real questions im abt to type all that up. We were like the most organized and dressed for business smile.gif

happy for u mrs scott i bet ur jumping up and down finally finally if i was ever happy for someone its you smile.gif !!!! congrats kicking.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif


Yes you had us worried but you came back with great news so I forgive ya good.gif good.gif good.gif

Let me know how long it takes for him to get visa in hand. I am still trying to get Corey here on my come back flight. November 16.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 19:41:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Mrs. Scott @ Oct 17 2007, 05:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
MY HUSBAND FINALLY GOT A DATE (NOVEMBER 13TH @ 1 PM). I LOVE YOU GUYS. kicking.gif good.gif BIG UP TO FATHER GOD, FAMILY, VJ MEMBERS & SENATOR JOHNNY ISAKSON! I HAVE ALREADY SCHEDULED KEVIN'S MEDICAL. THIS IS SO SURREAL. WE ARE CELEBRATING OUR FIRST WEDDING ANNIVERSARY ON SATURDAY, OCTOBER 20TH. I AM OFF TO JAMAICA ON FRIDAY. I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!! good.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif



Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 19:33:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 17 2007, 01:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi Everyone, Wow, it's really slow today.

Just wondering if anyone has heard from JALOVE??

Bless-Bless heart.gif ,

Gill



I haven't i hope she is ok. She is supposed to be coming back today right.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 12:32:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 17 2007, 09:18 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**********Wednesday Chuckle**********
HAPPY HUMP DAY!!!
Enjoy heart.gif,
Gill ...(Let me know if translation is needed)

********************************************************************************
********

Aliens In Jamaica



There was this couple sitting on the porch in Westmoreland, Jamaica watching the sun go down. All of a sudden this shooting light went across the sunset.

Wife: "A wha dat?"
Husband: "A mus' one space ship."

Wife: "Spaceship???? You damn Eeediat!!"
A little while later the couple went back into the house. Suddenly there was a knock on the door and the husband opened it. There was an alien couple on the doorstep.

Alien Male: "Good evening, we come in peace. May we rest in your dwelling while our space ship is fixed?" The husband's eyes almost popped out of his head because the female alien had a WICKED body.

Husband: "Come een, come een. Of course you can come an' res' yuhself." So the husband and wife fed and watered their guests and showed them to their room for the night.

Male Alien: "Where we come from it is our tradition to swop partners when we have guests." Well, the husband was up to it, because the female alien was seriously turning him on with her looks.

Husband: "Well, dats alright with me."
Wife: "Oh, I don't know, because I don't really believe in dat kind of t'ing."

Husband: "Come on honey, is only a lickle bit of fun, an nobody nuh gwine know."
Wife: "Well, OK then."

The male alien takes the wife into his room, and, knowing that she wasn't 100% comfortable with the idea, he was very gentle and gave her plenty foreplay. When they got into the swing of things the male alien asked, "would you like a bit more length?"

Wife: "Likkle more length,? hee! hee!, a wha yuh mean? How you gwine do dat?"

So the alien twists his right ear, and presto!, his willy gets longer. Well the wife was having a whale of a time when the Alien asked, "would you like a bit more width?"

Wife: "Width! Well, OK then."
So the alien twists his left ear, and presto!, his willy gets fatter.

The following morning the wife wakes up with the biggest smile you can imagine on her face and walks into the living room to find her husband looking vex sitting on the sofa.

Wife: "Hello darling, did you have a good night last night?"

Husband: "Stuups ..... No! All night long di damn woman just deh deh a twis up, twis up mi rass ears dem".



HA! HA! Sweet.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-17 12:29:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (MSNELLY @ Oct 16 2007, 05:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 16 2007, 04:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
:

Remember when I told you guys that I hadn't been billed for my international calls on my home phone since July? Well, I get the bill today an de eediats chat bout mi owe $1100!!! Dem eediats billed me at .50 cents per minute instead of .19 cents per minute!!!!
I got a nice guy th5at issued the credit and told me to call back tomorrow to set up payment arrangements since the calls cover several months.

You are lucky my cell phone bill was $3500 with verizon. I called and asked for a payment plan and i was told i could pay $500 a week until it was paid off. I said if i could afford 500 a week i wouldn't need a payment plan. Thats when Corey got a mega phone and told me i was high maintence. LOL



WOW blink.gif $3500 WHAT U GOING TO DO


I quit them and got a new phone. I am paying them 200 a month until i pay it off.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-16 20:10:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
[quote name='jawi876' date='Oct 16 2007, 05:33 PM' post='1261767']
offtopic45vn.gif protest6wz.gif

Remember when I told you guys that I hadn't been billed for my international calls on my home phone since July? Well, I get the bill today an de eediats chat bout mi owe $1100!!! Dem eediats billed me at .50 cents per minute instead of .19 cents per minute!!!!

I got a nice guy that issued the credit and told me to call back tomorrow to set up payment arrangements since the calls cover several months.

You are lucky my cell phone bill was $3500 with verizon. I called and asked for a payment plan and i was told i could pay $500 a week until it was paid off. I said if i could afford 500 a week i wouldn't need a payment plan. Thats when Corey got a mega phone and told me i was high maintence. LOL
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-16 16:50:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 16 2007, 05:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jamerican @ Oct 16 2007, 12:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 15 2007, 08:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thanks Marie and jamerican -- it is going to be an adjustment for him. According to him, Miramar is Kingston 21; he says it is like Jamaica only cleaner laughing.gif laughing.gif It is amazing having him here and it feels like a dream. I feel like I am dreaming and any moment I am going to wake up and he is not beside me. It is such a dream come true...I know it is not going to be an easy transition, but to have my best friend here with me is AMAZING.
The most disappointing aspect thus far is that he will have to wait 21 days to go to the Social Security office to get his SSN. Since all the changes, there has been some issues with issuing SSC because some applicants have been going into the SSA office and applying for the SSC while the Immigration agency is also issuing one for them; so people have been getting 2 SSNs. Honestly it concerns me that some disconnect is still happening between government agencies -- isn't this how 9/11 occurred? mad.gif
So apparently the whole Social Security BS is that if he doesn't have a SSC within 21 days, we should go back to the office and then they have to check the master list to see if his card is being processed; if he is not on the list, then they can start the process of getting his SSC...#######???!!!!! mad.gif Since graduating from HS, hubby has been working, so he doesn't know what it is like not making his own money; I know there is going to be a job on his horizon because his boss from his last job is trying to talk up some suppliers in Florida, to hook him up with something. So this is frustrating for him!

I didn't realize you were in Florida...YOU ARE SOOO LUCKY! The transition should be an easier one than most being that there are so many people from Jamaica there so he shouldn't be "Longing for" his culture. From what I understand it is the many laws and rules that people have the most difficulty dealing with here in the states. Have fun, don't pinch yourself too many times as you are not dreaming... good.gif Patience and persistance DOES PAY OFF!

Thanks jamerican. Any adjustment outside of Florida, we will do it together. Since moving to the US, I have never lived outside of Florida; so that I am okay with smile.gif. As we all talked about early on in this thread, I made sure and told hubby no peeing on the side of the road laughing.gif


LOL
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-16 16:44:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Sorry interview is November 6. I fly down November 5. I am excited and stressed at the same time.

QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 16 2007, 04:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 16 2007, 03:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 16 2007, 03:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
HEY DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW MUCH AN NO-IMPEDMENT OF MARRIAGE IS IN JA. MY FIANCEE SAID THEY TOLD HIM $200.


U.S.???? I thought I read $90-100...is it really that much???
Gill


DONT KNOW DO YOU REALLY NEED IT. ALSO COREY HAS HIS INTERVIEW OCTOBER 6, 2007. WE SCHEDULED HIS MEDICAL FOR OCT 18, 2007 AND HE STILL HAS NOT RECIEVED HIS PACKET 4 ANY THOUGHTS. SORRRRRRRRRRY I AM SO RUDE HELLO ALL HOPE EVERYONE IS HAVING A BLESSED DAY

Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-16 15:49:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 16 2007, 03:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 16 2007, 03:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
HEY DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW MUCH AN NO-IMPEDMENT OF MARRIAGE IS IN JA. MY FIANCEE SAID THEY TOLD HIM $200.


U.S.???? I thought I read $90-100...is it really that much???
Gill


DONT KNOW DO YOU REALLY NEED IT. ALSO COREY HAS HIS INTERVIEW OCTOBER 6, 2007. WE SCHEDULED HIS MEDICAL FOR OCT 18, 2007 AND HE STILL HAS NOT RECIEVED HIS PACKET 4 ANY THOUGHTS. SORRRRRRRRRRY I AM SO RUDE HELLO ALL HOPE EVERYONE IS HAVING A BLESSED DAY
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-16 15:09:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
HEY DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW MUCH AN NO-IMPEDMENT OF MARRIAGE IS IN JA. MY FIANCEE SAID THEY TOLD HIM $200.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-16 14:40:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Sorry to hear that. If only men thought like us women and were sensitive to our needs the world would be a better place.

QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Oct 15 2007, 02:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jengles @ Oct 15 2007, 02:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 15 2007, 02:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jengles @ Oct 15 2007, 01:12 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 15 2007, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jengles @ Oct 15 2007, 11:50 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
hey everyone - I'm back to work today, so i will be posting more, mr jengles is home with the baby...he's not feeling that exactly but i told him it is what we have to do for now, he wants to work something i am pleased about but i have to work on feeling out his aos papers.


I know alot of men don't "get" that they have to be a responsible parent when they chose to get a woman pregnant ....but um, helllloooo??? Whose gonna when we have to go to work !! ??



I never said he wasn't a responsible parent, but do agree with your comment



I don't think she meant it bad there, Jengles. I had somewhat the same thing....Andre kept telling me how bored he was at home while I was working almost 80 hours a week to support us both. I finally got to the point where I said shut the hell up..... It's not like I want to be doing this. I think she meant it kind of along those lines.


Ok That I totally understand....


i think what she ment was not the he doesn't want to be resonsible but that he has to shed his single boy lifestyle....that he has a child and a wife and even though he may want to go out...he has a role that he needs to do....
going through the same thing with mike...and our child isn't even here....he has started this thing were he feels the need to go out EVERY weekend....and doesn't get it that is ok...but not everyweekend....he should be taking care of me....it is my turn to be taken care of and pamperd....but he hasn't gotten that yet...he may never....

Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-15 15:45:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
When they take blood try not to look. I am a diabetic so i get blood taken every three months. Congrats on your having a baby. I look at everyones timelines and i am like wow.

QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Oct 15 2007, 02:23 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 15 2007, 01:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 15 2007, 10:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 15 2007, 01:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Oct 15 2007, 07:08 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Had my blood taken today.....yuck....first time i ever had it done...... halloween.gif



OMG!!! How old are you?! This is the FIRST time you ever had blood drawn? Are you sure?


Shoot, I was pregnant at 27 when I had those viles of blood taken from me. I had never had blood drawn like that up to that point?! and now that I'm 42, hasn't happened since that time.....


Lord, well something must really be wrong with me cause i have never had a child so I dont know how much blood they draw, but I have had so many viles of blood in my life I could give about 2 of yall a transfusion. I guess I am odd in that since and never even know it. LOL laughing.gif

So how much do they draw, is it really that much?? I'm actually fascinated with blood drawing...yeah I'm wierd...but like I said I've gone thru it so much its just interestign to see now.


well i am 25 and was never sent to get any blood done...they gave me this drink i had to drink in 5 mins...at first it tasted good then it started to have a BAD after taste.....she found the vein no problem and took 6 yes 6 things of blood.....fun times....

Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-15 15:40:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
For me i know that Corey works hard, but does not make alot of money. So I try to help as much as i can. I tell myself it is not always going to be like this.



QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 15 2007, 02:23 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 14 2007, 06:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hello All,

The answer to how not to miss your man so much is to work your but off. You are going to need the money anyways. Money for USCIS, Visa, travel and don't forget the wedding. But even with all of this you still miss them something terible. I miss mine everyday and count down the weeks until i see him again. When we started this journey we thought it would only be a couple months. Not so on seven months and counting.


Hello Nicky, saw your post and it prompted me to ask this question...not directly to you but in general to all cause I have seen posts and statements like your before.

My question to all is why are we working so hard to pay for EVERYTHING!! Visas, travel, even our own wedding. I mean....are these men contributing ANYTHING to the process? Shouldn't he be working his butt off to pay for his plane ticket or at least the cost of his passport and visa. Whats that all about? I understand the pay scale is different in Jamaica, but the need is still the same as here in the US.....so if he wants to come here, and be with you, he should be paying for it. Him not paying for at least 40% of this process is a problem to me. And if he can't afford it then he cant come til he can! I mean this is residency into the most sought after country in all the WORLD....this is a big move and "accomplishment" to say the least....if someone really wants it...they will make a way to get it paid for......

Just something to ponder.

Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-15 01:53:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Next time he knows better. Do you think he will learn not to take you for granted or will there possiblibly be a repeat.

QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 14 2007, 10:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Nicky Salmon @ Oct 14 2007, 09:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Sorry,

I am new to this and seemed to have posted this in the wrong place. It is customary to send invatations 6 weeks prior to the wedding. However from what i have seen time is different for the US and Jamaica. Jamaican time is more lax not definate.

If your husband is anything like Corey arguing is not going to get you anywhere. Men on average hate conflict. I know I am surrounded by them at work on a daily bases.


Yeah, but the bride is an american woman.... born and bred.....so not sure why the "lax" jamaican of a phone call would suffice over an actual wedding invitation? Who knows.... I don't care anymore. Trust me....I know that arguing will get nowhere, but when you have an adult conversation (or at least try to) and one of those "adults" acts like a child, it's truly frustrating!!!

He's now called 3 more times....so are you still not coming to get me? As I'm in my PJ's in bed !!!!

Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-15 01:49:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 14 2007, 12:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi everybody! thanks for your well wishes and encouragement it means alot to me im just gettin myself together today im gonna go in town have a good day the rain has cleared it was sunny today and yesterday. The day i get here Chris decides to say that hes not ready to get married. Im like when did u plan on sayin this. helpsmilie.gif

IM prayin that everyone get their interview dates soon!!! have a blessed day everyone good.gif



Are you ok? Are you still going to the interview.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-15 01:37:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
Sorry,

I am new to this and seemed to have posted this in the wrong place. It is customary to send invatations 6 weeks prior to the wedding. However from what i have seen time is different for the US and Jamaica. Jamaican time is more lax not definate.

If your husband is anything like Corey arguing is not going to get you anywhere. Men on average hate conflict. I know I am surrounded by them at work on a daily bases.
Nicky SalmonFemaleJamaica2007-10-14 20:53:00