ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Middle East and North AfricaFirst Jobs in the US for MENA SOs
Even if they get a new passport, wouldn't their name pop up in the system? A new passport doesn't create a new record in the american immigration system.

Ugh, people gaming the system bother me to no end. Hopefully what goes around, comes around.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-12 14:16:00
Middle East and North AfricaFirst Jobs in the US for MENA SOs
Yeah, that GC plan totally would not work.

Now that you are a permenant resident

Maintaining Permanent Residence
Maintaining Permanent Residence You may lose your permanent residence status if you commit an act that makes you removable from the United States under the law in section 237 of the Immigration and Nationality Act. If you commit such an act, you may be brought before the immigration courts to determine your right to remain a Permanent Resident.

You may be found to have abandoned your permanent resident status if you:


  • Move to another country intending to live there permanently.
  • Remain outside of the US for more than one year without obtaining a reentry permit or returning resident visa. However in determining whether your status has been abandoned any length of absence from the US may be considered, even if it is less than one year.
  • Remain outside of the US for more than two years after issuance of a reentry permit without obtaining a returning resident visa. However in determining whether your status has been abandoned any length of absence from the US may be considered, even if it is less than one year.
  • Fail to file income tax returns while living outside of the US for any period.
  • Declare yourself a “nonimmigrant” on your tax returns.

The immigration people aren't stupid. They'd look at his travel record and conclude that he's living outside the country.

QUOTE
The green card part doesn't make any sense to me because I can't see how much more valuable an American green card is to an Egyptian in the Gulf, but I don't get everything there is to get in the world to begin with


This I do understand, I think. Non gulf arabs are treated as second class citizens, south asians and south east asians as third class citizens (or slaves), and americans and western europeans as first class citizens. Maybe with the GC, he's be a 1 1/2 class citizen? If that's really his plan, it would make more sense to wait and become a citizen.

Edited by UmmSqueakster, 12 June 2009 - 01:11 PM.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-12 13:10:00
Middle East and North AfricaFirst Jobs in the US for MENA SOs
Ugh re: moving to find a job. I don't have any advice, but just that this is something people on the forum should be aware of and talk about with their SO before they get here.

My FIL spent many years working in Saudi away from his family, so for AbuS, it's normal for the father to be away from the family for extended periods of time. AbuS even considered moving to Poland, because there's apparently a demand for arabic teachers ranting33va.gif

I know there are others on the forum who's husbands have insisted on moving for a job. Perhaps they can share their experiences.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-12 08:57:00
Middle East and North AfricaFirst Jobs in the US for MENA SOs
Hmm, how about UPS? It's only part time, but it pays decently - $8-10 an hour I believe, and many places offer tuition reiumbursement.

https://ups.managehr...earnProgram.htm
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-09 16:19:00
Middle East and North AfricaFirst Jobs in the US for MENA SOs
QUOTE (S and S @ Jun 9 2009, 01:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thanks for taking the time to write everything out. Those are good suggestions. We have done some of them, but not all. I will certainly keep your advice in mind. As for money, it is tricky. I'm not working anymore and will start unemployment soon. I am going back to school and will get paid almost a $1000 a month while in school, but that isn't much. We really do need him to work at least a decent job to make up the difference though it doesn't have to be super paying for starting out of course. Surviving and keeping up on the minimum bills is the key.


If he needs a year of school to get a decent job, then put him in school! While it's not the ideal situation, could you put off your school for a year while he gets certified? Then he could make a decent salary and support you while you go to school.

Would you both be able to work ok jobs and go to school part time? That may work. When AbuS arrived, I worked full time and went to school part time at night. It made for some long days (7:30 am until 10 pm), and it didn't do much for our relationship, but it kept us from being homeless.


I will say this now ladies - DO NOT expect your husband to get a job that pays a decent wage. If he does, then you can be pleasantly suprised. But if he doesn't, then you won't be screwed over because you planned for him to bring in x amount. Best to plan for the worst and hope for the best.

And if you're still in school or plan to go back soon, put off immigration if it's possible. I was ready to file for AbuS in 2003, but waited until 2005 because I wanted to complete my BA and get a job that would support us before bringing him here. I ended up pursuing a certificate while he was here, but we did ok moneywise with just my job, even paying for school.

Edited by UmmSqueakster, 09 June 2009 - 03:17 PM.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-09 15:15:00
Middle East and North AfricaFirst Jobs in the US for MENA SOs
AbuS' first job was in a check cashing place. Total soul suck and haram to no end.


There are a few things that really helped him:

1. Internship. I wish we had thought of this sooner. He got an internship as an accountant in a non profit. This was how he landed his first real job as an accountant at a theater. He learned valuable lessons of how to work in an american office, bulked up his resume and he got a fabulous reference who helped him beyond compare. If you are ok on money and dont need him earning a ton of money, americorp offers a lot of internship type opportunities that look fabulous on the resume.

2. Practice practice practice. Practice job interview. Practice writing cover letters. Practice writing resumes. Practice until he's perfect, literally. The accent may not have completly disapeared, but he should be able to hold a phone conversation without confusing the person on the other end. And his cover letter should be fluent enough that the receipient won't be befuddled by the quirky english.

3. ESL classes. Even if he thinks he's good, he could probably stand for some improvement. And if the local ESL classes say he's good enough, find a way for him to speak english with a wide variety of people. I can't emphasize enough how important verbal communication is for landing a good job.

4. Keep a list of everywhere he's applying. Seriously, spreadsheet. If he's applying for a dozen jobs a week, it can be hard to keep track of them.

5. Don't answer the phone. Now, this may sound counterproductive, but it works. If they're interested in him, they'll leave a message. Listen to the message, consult the list of jobs, review the job posting, review the cover letter he sent and then call them back. That way he has a chance to compose himself and sound put together and with it. This is seriously how my husband landed his current job. They were so impressed with his initial phone interview that they asked him to come in ASAP and hired him 2 hours after the interview.

6. Job training. If he doesn't have a college education (or even if he does and isn't have any luck finding work with it), look into a job training program. They will help him with the necessary skills for job hunting and will help him in his search.

7. Patience! Patience! Patience! It took AbuS 3 years to find a good job, and many many many many long months of unemployment that were increadibly demoralizing. And then just when everything was looking up, he lost that good job due to the economy. It sucks. It really really does. But inshaAllah this too shall pass.

Edited by UmmSqueakster, 09 June 2009 - 01:49 PM.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-09 13:48:00
Middle East and North AfricaAre Muslims in America Unfriendly?
QUOTE (MrsAmera @ Jun 26 2009, 12:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Oooh also - for the dreaded "Oh where are you from" question. I've taken to responding "Wisconsin!" like it's an exotic foreign location - simply out of irriation that NO ONE who asks that questions expects you to say somewhere in the United States



Ha! I love it when the haters say "go back where you came from!" To which I can reply, "you know, Wisconsin is lovely this time of year and I do miss those cheese curds, but I am quite happy where I'm at, thank you very much. Go Packers!"
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-26 12:31:00
Middle East and North AfricaAre Muslims in America Unfriendly?
Oh, re salaaming men. Something I do not do, unless they're someone I know at the masjid, or are the very friendly people at the african american masjid I attend for jummah.

If a man salaams me on the street, I'll return and then try to escape. If I don't, the conversation goes something like this:

Ooo, where are you from?

America.

You are from america, really? MashaAllah. Are you married?

Yes

Oh (looks dejected, walks away)
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-26 11:46:00
Middle East and North AfricaAre Muslims in America Unfriendly?
Sometimes yes, sometimes no. We have a ton of somali sisters here, and I find if I approach them on the street with a smile on my face, they'll smile back and we'll often overlap in our salaams. A few times I've had random sisters strike up conversations with me on the street, but usually it's just smile, salaams, continue.

If they're first generation immigrants, maybe they come from countries were people don't offer salaams to people on the street. If every person they're used to passing is muslim, they won't be whipping out the salaams and stopping to chat with everyone.

As for the masjid, I spent many years waiting for sisters to come up and chat with me when I was the obviously new person. At somali and african american masjids, they will. At arab and south asian masjids, they tend not to. In that latter situation, I'll take the iniative and start the talk. Still doesn't mean I'm in though. I've been trying to get in on the egyptian iftar for years now, and they still won't invite me to help them prepare it, even though I've offered and AbuS is constantly talking up my mad cooking skills to the egyptian husbands mad.gif


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-26 08:43:00
Middle East and North AfricaAnti-Islam demonstrators at Boston mosque opening
This is nothing compared to the ol MENA fight club days. I haven't had to bust out Daler in years


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-30 15:19:00
Middle East and North AfricaAnti-Islam demonstrators at Boston mosque opening
Oh man oh man, let's drag out the pitch forks and go after this guy too

QUOTE (clearly a man in need of boycotting)
You nest of poisonous snakes! How will you escape from being sentenced to hell?

So I am sending you prophets, wise men, and teachers. You will kill some of them. You will nail some to a cross. Others you will whip in your synagogues. You will chase them from town to town.

O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-30 10:46:00
Middle East and North AfricaAnti-Islam demonstrators at Boston mosque opening
More pictures of the opening - http://www.masboston.org/isbcc/v2/ - the masjid looks absolutely gorgeous

Hasn't this conflict been going on for years? Ah yes - http://www.csmonitor...13s01-lire.html
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-29 09:05:00
Middle East and North AfricaYou know your husband's Egyptian when...
Has anyone read the story of Bilal (ra)? How he accepted Islam as a slave and when his master found out, he took him out to the desert and ordered him to renounce his faith? And when he refused, his master tied him down to the hot desert sand and began to pile boulders on top of him, all the while demanding that he renounce his faith? And despite the torture, Bilal (ra) kept repeating "Ahad, Ahad," one, one, denying the polytheism his master was demanding of him.

When the suffering became to great for some of the companions in Mecca, did they leave parts of the religion that were causing them too much trouble? No, instead they migrated to Abyssinia and then later to Medina.

No matter what we suffer here, it is very rarely up to the level of suffering of the Prophet (saws) and his companions (ra).



For better or for worse, muslims view hijab as a sign of faith. It isn't simply a piece of cloth - it's a visible sign of submission to Allah (swt). If one's relationship is based on Allah (swt) first and foremost, then leaving an aspect of the religion is taking out a plank upon which the relationship is based.

I have no desire to debate whether or not hijab is required. Suffice to say that if one looks to the ulema of the last 1400 years, there's an obvious consensus and it's not that it's a choice.


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-08 09:05:00
Middle East and North AfricaYou know your husband's Egyptian when...
Oh soccer. Thankfully he's less obsessed now, but before...

...when I met his mom and sister for the first time, we went to a really fancy outdoor restaurant. His sister only knows a few words of english and his mom knows none. He excused himself to go to the bathroom and I was left there smiling with nothing to say. 5 minutes...10 minutes...15 minutes... I finally got up and walked in the direction I had seen him go. What was he doing? Watching a soccer match with some of the waiters blink.gif


For those who's egyptians have not arrived yet, have him bring antibiotics with him if he's reliant on them. I'd rather AbuS not take them, but he insists, so he has a stock here that we've gotten from friends who've gone overseas. The first time he got sick and realized he couldn't purchase them from the local drug store was not a happy event.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-11 12:31:00
Middle East and North AfricaTuesday
92nd Annual Lion's Club International something or other going on here in Minneapolis today, which means there's a parade of nations going on right outside my job. I haven't been around people from so many countries since I went to Disney World star_smile.gif

Was on the lookout for MENA lions, but only came across the egyptians and turks. They were dressed like cleopatra, some with hijab. Alas, they weren't giving out flags. The turks did not return my salaams, despite the very muslim sounding names on their name tags mad.gif
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-07 13:02:00
Middle East and North AfricaWhat do I need to keep?
QUOTE (wife_of_mahmoud @ Jul 8 2009, 10:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Pictures of you with his family will also be very helpful.


WOM! *hale, hale, the gang's all here*
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-09 08:42:00
Middle East and North AfricaGuess its my turn to share my bad news
Good for you for knowing when to get out. I'm sending positive vibes, thoughts and prayers your way. I hope your health improves soon.


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-10 07:59:00
Middle East and North AfricaAnyone get sick after coming back?
I've never gotten sick and have drank the water straight from the tap each time I've been there. My sister, on the other hand, was increadibly ill for weeks after she went just once. If the problem persists, do see a doctor, in case it's some germs or parasites medicine can help with.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-10 14:17:00
Middle East and North AfricaA Hard Situation
Actually, hanafis do not require a wali for the marriage to be valid

http://www.scribd.co...a-Guardian-Wali
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-02 12:59:00
Middle East and North AfricaA Hard Situation
My family too did not (and still does not) like my husband. It does make things harder, but not insurmountable.

Would your parents be willing to communicate with your fiance via email? If your husband wrote a letter, would they read it? Or would they be happier if you 2 got married in Egypt? Or if he spent some time with them in Egypt? It's hard for parents to send their little girl off to another country with someone they don't know very well. They probably don't have much knowledge of american men aside from what they see on TV, and don't know what kind of husband he would be. Even if they seem misguided, they really do believe they have your best interest in mind.

Where would you be moving in the US? Is there a muslim population there? Egyptians? Maybe they would feel better knowing more about where you were going, not just to the america they see on TV and in the movies.

AbuS and I talk about the marriages of our (future inshaAllah) children, and how we would react if they met someone online like we did. We both feel that if our daughter or son came to us and was honest about it, kept us actively aprised of the relationship, if the person was a good muslim and gave us a good opportunity to go with him/her to meet this person, we'd be ok with it. That wasn't something we did with our own relationship, and it caused a lot of problems that we're still feeling the effects of 8 years later.

Edited by UmmSqueakster, 01 July 2009 - 04:01 PM.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-01 16:00:00
Middle East and North AfricaIt is official
Yayyyyyyyyyyy, congratulations! I'm so glad you found someone who was helpful for you. That will make a big difference learning how to pray and what not. Welcome to islam!
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-11 17:28:00
Middle East and North AfricaHaram in Islam to profess love publicly
It's haram to make the halal haram innocent.gif
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-21 12:32:00
Middle East and North AfricaDoes anyone else feel this way?
We are coming up on our 4th US anniversary this October inshaAllah, but I don't know if I would call us a sucess. We're 2 very stubborn people who annoy the heck out of each other, but happen to love each other very much, so we've somehow managed to put up with each others BS this long without killing each other laughing.gif

Do I know I'm not being used? Yes. How do I know? I just do, can't explain it. I don't think it's because I'm ignoring any red flags (we didn't really have any) or that I'm naive. Part of it is that I know my husband is a very honest man who fears Allah (swt), and he knows that if he cheated me, on the Day of Judgment I'd demand to be compensated. This isn't to say that religious men can't be scammers - I know of some who are. But in my case, I've known my husband for nearly 8 years and just know. Not that that will help alleviate your fears, sorry.

And, if it turns out he is a scammer, well then, qadr Allah, it's the will of God and be rest assured he'll pay for it when the time comes headbonk.gif
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-17 08:50:00
Middle East and North AfricaWhy is saying goodbye so hard?
QUOTE (Bobby_Umit @ Jul 20 2009, 07:18 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I never say "good bye" - I say "till we are together again..."


Yup, AbuS and I have never said goodbye to each other. It's always, see you later, etc etc etc.

While it is painful now, try to use your time and your energy for preparing things here for him. Learn to cook his favorite dishes, clear out space for him in the closet, scope out ESL classes, learn arabic to suprise him, there are a million things you can do.

Then enjoy your last days as a single lady, cuz when he gets here, there won't be the time to go out with the girlfriends as much anymore, or other things you enjoyed doing.

In the end, inshaAllah you will have many decades together. What is a year or 2 in the grand scheme of things?
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-20 07:58:00
Middle East and North AfricaJust a hi and an update
Glad to hear you're doing well. Yup, very rarely is there such thing as a smooth adjustment.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-27 14:28:00
Middle East and North AfricaNot a religious Man
inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'oon - to God we belong and to Him is our return rose.gif
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-27 08:45:00
Middle East and North AfricaI lost my husband today
rose.gif

Positive thoughts and vibes headed your way


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-27 08:46:00
Middle East and North AfricaJust thought I'd share...
mabrook! MENA babies are the best kicking.gif
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-20 07:36:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrance to ban Burqas/Niqab in Public?
Also, what's so funny about niqabi women shopping for fashionable clothes? Does the author really think they wear all black 24/7? That's almost are rediculous as the people who ask if hijabis wear "it" in the shower.

Some of the most bling-ful women I've seen are hijabis and niqabis at all women's parties.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-25 15:38:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrance to ban Burqas/Niqab in Public?
According to my (non muslim) mom's (non muslim) physician, vitamen d definciencies are rampant in population at large. He's been pushing vitamen d pills for years. She in turn pushes them on me and will occasionally slip a bottle into a bag of books she gives me. Except they usually have gelatin in them. Dur.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-25 15:36:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrance to ban Burqas/Niqab in Public?
I'm sorry, but did or did not the french government ruthlessly supress native populations in north africa? In no way am I suggesting the descendents of this oppression rise up and take an eye for an eye. I am merely commenting on the irony of the french government whining about a few muslim women wearing a face veil as a threat to the very framework of their society when the french government did much worse to threaten framework of the societies they colonized.

And also the fact that many of these people are even in france is also a direct result of france's colonizing efforts in north africa. There wouldn't be a veil problem in france if france didn't colonize in the first place.


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-23 09:04:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrance to ban Burqas/Niqab in Public?
What goes around comes around.

That's karma.

It will come back to bite them in the behind.

Payback is a b*tch.

France imposed their culture upon muslim countries, often ruthlessley. I can't help but thinking that muslims practicing their culture in France is cosmic payback.


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-23 07:57:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrance to ban Burqas/Niqab in Public?
QUOTE (MrsAmera @ Jun 22 2009, 07:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
There is a difference between burqa and niqab - and from reading several article he is refering to an Afghan burqa.


That is because journalists in general, quite frankly, have a difficult time explaining islam. While here in america, we think afghanistan when we hear burqa, throughout most of the rest of the world, it conjures images of the black niqab.

From LeMonde:




If you said burqa in Egypt, this is what you would get:



This is a burqa in oman:




and a saudi burqa:






I can't imagine that there are any afghan burqa wearers in France. The articles I have read talk about the salafi influence on women who wear these. Salafi women wear niqab, saudi burqas, not afghan burqas.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-22 21:36:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrance to ban Burqas/Niqab in Public?
I think there is a problem with translation. I doubt Sarkozy was refering to the afghan burqa. Instead, I think he was refering to the face veil, known as niqab here in the US, and a burqa in the gulf. I can't imagine more than a small handfull of women wear an afghan burqa, as the niqab + abaya/jelbab is far the far more common way of concele the face and body.

Time for me to bust out my periwinkle niqab and take a trip to france. Or maybe I should buy the pink one that I've had my eye on for awhile whistling.gif

Honestly, it's all just counter productive. Women who do not want to reveal their faces in public will end up staying home and be in increased isolation. And if a husband is an #### enough to force a wife to wear one against her will, does he really think he's suddenly going to see the light and let her go out without one?

On a tangent...everytime I see the french government getting all uppity about the audacity of muslims to cover, I think, well, that's what you get for colonizing muslim countries.

Edited by UmmSqueakster, 22 June 2009 - 03:15 PM.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-06-22 15:13:00
Middle East and North AfricaHelpful Islamic Books
Read 2 good books this weekend.

Patience and Gratitutude - somethings I definitely need more of

The Remembrance of God : The Outcome of Contemplation Over Loud Dhikr - the actual text translated is very brief, but it has a good biography of Imam al Suyuti, good footnotes and appendices.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-08-03 09:22:00
Middle East and North AfricaHelpful Islamic Books
Hmm, I do not have a book on that, but I do have Imam Suhaib's Mothers of the Believers CD set. Very good stuff.

While the price tag looks high, one thing to do is to write down everything you spend in a week. Find a few things that aren't that important - coffee, going out to lunch - cut it out, and then put that money aside in an 'ilm fund. In a matter of weeks, there'll be enough to buy a book or 2, and in a few months, a CD set.
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-28 12:53:00
Middle East and North AfricaHelpful Islamic Books
QUOTE (amal @ Jul 28 2009, 11:50 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Wow! Who knew there were so many great reads out there! Where to start, where to start...



What do you want to read?

And also something to remember is that classical texts weren't meant to be published and simply read by any old person. A teacher taught them to their students, who in turn would teach them to more students, and pass it down that way. While books are awesome (I love books, can you tell?), they can't be a substitute for a flesh and blood human being star_smile.gif
UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-28 12:03:00
Middle East and North AfricaHelpful Islamic Books
I have a catalog of my islamic book collection on library thing - http://www.libraryth...m/catalog/rahma

Books with 4 and 5 stars are those I really really like
Books with 3 stars are those I'm neutral on
Books with 1 or 2 stars are those I do not like


My all time favorites (and there are a lot):

The Accepted Whisper - a large collection of dua from the Qur'an and Hadith, in english and arabic with transliteration + commentary

Agenda to Change our Condition - finally back in print (alhamdulilah!), a concise program to self reflection and change

Al-Maqasid - everyone needs a book of basic fiqh, and this is the best basic shafi'i fiqh book I've found for ibadah.

Al-Muhaddithat - the women scholars in islam - in case you ever feel like women have no place in muslim societies

Believing as Ourselves - every convert experiences a crash after the initial conversion high. You're not alone

Blissful Marriage - excellent marriage book

The Compendium of Knowledge and Wisdom - Rajab ibn Hanbal's commentary on 50 hadith

The Creed of Imam Tahawi - translated by Hamza Yusuf - with all the aqida wars ongoing, it's good to read the basics and not be involved in all the hubbub and fluff

The Difference of the Imams - a very basic introduction to why the madhabs differ

For God and Country: Faith and Patriotism under Fire - James Yee is an amazing american, and this book is his account of the hell his country put him through

The Heirs of the Prophets - the importance of scholars in the deen

Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship - probably one of my all time favorite books. Helps to deepen our practice of the pillars of the religion

Key of the Garden - who knew there was so much to write on la ilaha il Allah? Great to read in small bits and reflect upon

Love for Allah - the importance and how to love Allah (swt)

Mecca, the Blessed, Medina, the Radiant - great coffee table books with pictures of the 2 holy cities.

The Message of the Qur'an - translation of the Qur'an by Muhammad Asad, great commentary and footnotes

Muhammad, the Prophet of Mercy - focuses on the (shockingly) the mercy of the Prophet (saws)

Muhammad - by Martin Lings, good all around biography of the Prophet (saws) based on traditional sources

Muslim Character - although I'm not a fan of the layout (poor editing), the content is excellent

The Noble Qur'an - translated by the Bewleys, simple, easy to read, not a lot of fluff

One Thousand Roads to Mecca - one of the first books I ever bought on Islam. I love to live vivaciously through other people, and these hajj narratives always make me long for the two holy sanctuaries

Prayers for Forgiveness - always need more of these

Prophetic Invocation - a wird (litany) based on the Qur'an and Sunnah to recite each day

Purification of the Heart - for inward reflection, contemplation and cleaning

Reflection of Pearls - great book of dua

Scattered Pictures - worth it just to read Imam Zaid's conversion story. Normally I'm not a fan of that genre, but this one makes me cry

The Seventy Seven Branches of Faith - discusses the 77 branches of faith (duh), 77 concrete things to learn, and incorporate into your life

Submission, Faith & Beauty - the best introduction to Islam I've come across

Sufism and Good Character - "In short, Sufism gives life to both the outward and inward. As for the outward, it does so through good deeds. As for the inward, it does so through the remembrance of Allah, leaving reliance on other than Him, adorning oneself with praiseworthy traits [akhlaq] and purifying oneself of the taint of base traits. "

Treatise for the Seekers of Guidance - a translation and commentary on a classic spiritual text that makes it easily relevant to the modern reader

Wisdom for the Seeker - translation of letters by Sh. Zulfiqar Ahmad to his students




UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-28 11:41:00
Middle East and North AfricaGetting out of a bad relationship
Why wait for him to change, when he can do real damage to you in the here and now?

Re: I-864, according to the form itself, page 3:

Your obligation to support the immigrant(s) you are sponsoring in this affidavit of support will continue until the sponsored immigrant becomes a U.S. citizen, or can be credited with 40 qualifying quarters of work

The obligation also ends if you or the sponsored immigrant dies or if the sponsored immigratn ceases to be a lawful permanent resident and deprats the United States. Divorce does not end the sponsorship obligation.


At this point, focus on getting yourself and your daughter out of the abusive situation. Are there women's groups locally? They would know how to best approach it in your area. After that, worry about the immigration related issues. I'd say he most likely can't be deported at this point.

I'm unsure about what you can do immigration wise. Try asking on this forum. I'd say at least write a letter to USCIS detailing the problems, and if you get police reports, restraining orders, whatever, send that along too. Maybe they would stick it in his file and when the time came for him to apply for citizenship, that would red flag his case.


UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-07-31 09:47:00
Middle East and North AfricaForgot marriage cert, in packet 3
Granted, our experience is now nearly 4 years old, but at the time, the embassy *thought* we forgot to include something, so they sent the packet back to us and asked us to send it back with all the information. That was only a few days after sent it.

I wouldn't send something in seperately, because I honestly wouldn't trust them to put it with your file.

But then, our experience with the embassy staff showed they were completely and totally incompitant, so I'm a bit biased. In addition to returning our packet 3, asking us for a document that was clearly *in* the documents they returned to us, thus causing a delay and costing us more LELELE, when AbuS had his interview, the initial interviewer couldn't find his folder and claimed his interview wasn't that day. Then after he found it, he went through the packet 3 and started throwing things in the garbage! Then, another person came to interview him and asked where forms x y and z were. AbuS tried to tell him they were in the garbage, but they made him fill them out again headbonk.gif

Edited by UmmSqueakster, 04 August 2009 - 11:18 AM.

UmmSqueaksterFemaleEgypt2009-08-04 11:18:00