biggish data

Why is it I see that some of the same people that don't believe anyone should be policing (did I spell that right?) posts are the ones actually doing it?

If by 'some people' you mean me...I'll tell ya why

I was bored yesterday, I noticed pic she posted....was lightly razzin her about the 'is that you or is the pic copyrighted, and then I googled & saw that it was indeed copyrighted. I'm not tellin her what to post and what not to post....but I will say I couldn't help but point out the problem. I felt since she's all © ™, she would be the first one to respect someone else's...but guess not!

Yes, the whole © ™ amuses me to no end, and many times I'm like a dog with a bone...but it was fun to see someone who makes a public statement be so disrespectful of the same thing when it comes to other people. And if ya ever catch me in a similar situation...by all means, bring it to my attn!

Have a good day ladies...I have an appt to get to (F)

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-20 13:21:00

You have overlooked the obvious....you're improperly using a pic without giving credit to the owner, of which there's a copyright. Surely someone with what's in your siggy would respect someone else's? Just helpin ya out hon! Or is it a case of 'do as I say not as I do'?

Hardly took any time at all, btw...google is my friend ....and it truly was my pleasure to help you see the flaws in your logic

That pic is on so many "free pic post" sites I can't even list them all.

But since you're so obsessed with my and other people's copyrights, why don't you go look up the copyrights on all the pics you've posted of "celebrities" that you think you resemble.

Hey, I don't have copyright disclaimers in my siggy...... :lol:

You know the point I'm trying to make, there's nowt you can do, so instead of this silly banter, take your lumps and move on, Ms ? It's been fun, hon! :lol:

Edited by LisaD, 20 October 2006 - 01:02 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-20 12:57:00

Apparantly, the pic that WOM posted is originally from a very strange site which depicts many odd and some would say sick, pictures. So again.....NOT A SAFE LINK....but since it was copyrighted, I felt the need to site the correct owner of the pic

You have apparently overlooked the obvious -- the pic I posted is not taken from either of your "links."

But I must say I'm very flattered with the time and attention you have spent fretting about whether I may copyright my own photos and essays !

You have overlooked the obvious....you're improperly using a pic without giving credit to the owner, of which there's a copyright. Surely someone with what's in your siggy would respect someone else's? Just helpin ya out hon! Or is it a case of 'do as I say not as I do'?

Hardly took any time at all, btw...google is my friend

....and it truly was my pleasure to help you see the flaws in your logic

Edited by LisaD, 20 October 2006 - 08:11 AM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-20 08:09:00

Actually, I apologise, W_O_M....i did not post the original link to the photographer's page.

http://hypnox.com/reagan/

there are the pics of that model....pretty interesting photos...thanks for showing us!

that link is NOT work safe, btw!
You wanna attach a warning next time you post porn here????

hookedonphonics.com hon

Oh, and I'm not the one who posted the original pic, kthxbye
There is a difference between not work safe and PORN. Lots of non porn sites are not work safe.
The original pic may have been distasteful but at least it wasn't porn like the pics in your link.

why would something be of 'not work safe' variety? hrmmm? come on vp, I know you can figure this out...

NOT TO MENTION

Apparantly, the pic that WOM posted is originally from a very strange site which depicts many odd and some would say sick, pictures. So again.....NOT A SAFE LINK....but since it was copyrighted, I felt the need to site the correct owner of the pic

Check the time there, hon.....6:42 pm. What time did you reply to this to call me out? How long after? 8:49pm! wow, let's see a whole 2 hours and 8 mins

Furthermore, I am merely citing copyright...since WOM seems concerned about that, I fig'd I'd help her out by allowing her to respect others' copyrights. I didnt' even repost the pic...So you want to yip at something? Go gnarl your teeth and wag your finger elsewhere, honey

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 20:30:00

Actually, I apologise, W_O_M....i did not post the original link to the photographer's page.

http://hypnox.com/reagan/

there are the pics of that model....pretty interesting photos...thanks for showing us!

that link is NOT work safe, btw!
You wanna attach a warning next time you post porn here????

hookedonphonics.com hon

Oh, and I'm not the one who posted the original pic, kthxbye

Edited by LisaD, 19 October 2006 - 07:54 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 19:53:00

Good God ppl... is it Friday yet???? Holy cripes! I was actually working, being productive and I come back to 6 pages of poo-slinging, misunderstandings, whatevertf....... time to wax my legs and maybe you gals should find something more productive to do w/ yourselves... geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezums!

eta... waxing my legs is less painful than reading all these ridiculous posts!

even at the ankles?

Actually, I apologise, W_O_M....i did not post the original link to the photographer's page.

http://hypnox.com/reagan/

there are the pics of that model....pretty interesting photos...thanks for showing us!

that link is NOT work safe, btw!

See what happens when I click on the link before I read your note!

I didn't see anything really, my company blocks many links, including this one.

Apparantly, the pic that WOM posted is originally from a very strange site which depicts many odd and some would say sick, pictures. So again.....NOT A SAFE LINK....but since it was copyrighted, I felt the need to site the correct owner of the pic
tattletail

just honoring the copyright...WOM would agree I think

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 17:51:00

Good God ppl... is it Friday yet???? Holy cripes! I was actually working, being productive and I come back to 6 pages of poo-slinging, misunderstandings, whatevertf....... time to wax my legs and maybe you gals should find something more productive to do w/ yourselves... geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezums!

eta... waxing my legs is less painful than reading all these ridiculous posts!

even at the ankles?

Actually, I apologise, W_O_M....i did not post the original link to the photographer's page.

http://hypnox.com/reagan/

there are the pics of that model....pretty interesting photos...thanks for showing us!

that link is NOT work safe, btw!

See what happens when I click on the link before I read your note!

I didn't see anything really, my company blocks many links, including this one.

Apparantly, the pic that WOM posted is originally from a very strange site which depicts many odd and some would say sick, pictures. So again.....NOT A SAFE LINK....but since it was copyrighted, I felt the need to site the correct owner of the pic

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 17:42:00

Actually, I apologise, W_O_M....i did not post the original link to the photographer's page.

http://hypnox.com/reagan/

there are the pics of that model....pretty interesting photos...thanks for showing us!

that link is NOT work safe, btw!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 17:01:00

Hey, W_O_M ...out of curiosity, is that pic copyrighted to someone else or is that you?

Did you not get the memo of the full copy of that pic, complete with copyright trademark and logo?

http://www.cthb.org/img/cheetos.jpg <---it's right there

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 16:44:00

Hey, W_O_M ...out of curiosity, is that pic copyrighted to someone else or is that you?

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 16:32:00

Like you just admitted, you just did the same thing with me.
But you did it first

First of all I'm not fighting with anyone. I commented on a post.
It's funny to me the ones who stand out against "post monitoring" are the ones at other times involved in it.
JP, you are forever calling for others to not tell someone else how to post but here you are telling me how to comment and post. It's really just a vicious circle. Either we're all adults and don't need to be told how to post or we're not.
I don't see anything wrong with pointing out that someone's statement may be taken in hateful terms. If you feel the same way about my comments that's fine too. We really don't have to keep going back and forth about it.

Your statements appear hateful, so maybe a lil less worrying about Sarah, and a lil more attn on your own posts wouldn't go amiss. Physician heal thyself!!!

Oh and I linked two of your statements in red cos I'm a huuuuuuuuuuge fan of irony

Anita Cocktail

Male

2006-10-19 16:24:00

I hate cell phones in MENA

I gotta hand it to you ladies...I could never deal with that. You're stronger than I am in this regard :thumbs:

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-02-27 11:25:00

Edited by LisaD, 05 May 2007 - 02:34 AM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-05-05 02:34:00

Sarah will always have a target on her back because some people are just waiting to be offended by her.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-05-04 20:11:00

I agree that sometimes it's good to report a thread like when some people were told they would have their faces kicked etc.
Sometimes people just go too far with the reporting and it turns into a bunch of grown people reporting anything they don't like just because they dislike someone. It's not a contest to see who can tattle the most. Well, for me it isn't at least.

Exactly...the 'report' button is being used as a weapon, and not as a last-resort.

LOL Jenn that was funny...

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-05-04 15:33:00

Isn't regular reporting considered antagonizing too tho?

I mean doesn't it take two, E?

Antagonizing whom, Captain Ewok?

He has encouraged reporting as a means of controlling the board, whether or not you agree with the whole concept of reporting.

I would think that if he found the number of reports to be excessive that he wouldn't have encouraged people to report problems.

No, antagonizing other posters...meaning say one thing that could be construed many different ways and then the other poster is all 'I'm reporting you'

Sarah takes a lot of flack while others can say similar things without being reported. I just think there's a disparity...just because something is reported does not mean that person was the one in the 'right'. It's all subjective, I suppose...but get a bunch of people who don't like a poster...and multiple reportings could have the possibility of giving E an inaccurate picture...

Edited by LisaD, 04 May 2007 - 03:02 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-05-04 15:02:00

Isn't regular reporting considered antagonizing too tho?

I mean doesn't it take two, E?

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-05-04 14:39:00

JP's fiance will be arriving tomorrow in the US!!!

Holy ####### JP! FINALLY!!!!

Yay for reunions!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-05-04 15:03:00

Deleting threads

Can someone point out the personal attacks? I'm not seeing them.
just drop it. it's a sore subject for those concerned.

personal posting dynamics aside, it's an important topic. If one is going to have his/her say, then the other should as well.

I am very sorry for Jackie, but if her husband wanted to put his point forth, I don't see what that has to do with family's safety.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-07-22 13:26:00

Concerns and Trust

First of all, I wanted to express my sympathy for those of you going through problems in your marriages right now. (F)

I've read most of this thread, and a few things stick out to me. So here's my .02:

I have to marvel at the capacity of your love for your husbands. My D is British, and that alone is enough of a cultural difference for me! hahaha! I don't think I'd have the strength or the tenacity to undertake something of such mammoth proportions. I see where many of you have the slight doubts that something may be wrong, there's the fear you may be hurt, yet you proceed anyway because of love. And I think that's a really remarkable thing. Hey, it might work, it might not...but one thing that no one can take away from any of you is that you put your all into this. So either way, you ladies should have no regrets for loving 'with all of your might' against the odds and despite the risks.

With great risk comes great reward. I hope each and every one of you find success in your marriages.

But I do see a lot of nervous justification, though...oh, not my husband because I did this that or the other. No one needs to justify her own relationship to anyone. I dunno if that's a subconscious thing or not, but (I think) if you're married and you're confident in your marriage, you don't owe anyone any explanations. If that's a coping mechanism, that's fine, I guess....but all those 'tests' aren't going to guarantee anything...so they essentially are meaningless. I don't mean to imply to throw caution to the wind; but if your security is based on checking his cellphone or talking to his neighbors, I think it's a bit of a house of cards.

But as an aside: if you ARE worried about the legitimacy of your husband's feelings...you must try to think like someone who's committing fraud. So many women have been duped and never saw it coming...so those who do come here by using a woman are good actors! A simple 'hey I'll move there' bluff isn't necessarily the be-all end all. You don't think that type of men would see that coming? If the husband says 'yes, come'...imo it could all be a huge bluff, knowing it would never come to pass.

Anyways, as far as the stereotyping goes...well, they became stereotypes for a reason. I could rattle off the stereotypical Italian-American-Catholic New Yorker - which is my own backgrounds - and most would fit the category. But not all. And each person's perspective should be taken witha grain of salt...if one has been burned, it is only natural that his/her perspective will be one fraught with negatives, because perspective is reality. All we each have to judge things on is our own perspective, and of course that's colored by our feelings and emotions as well. I see a lot of contagious paranoia here...so while posters x,y,and z are having problems....that doesn't mean a,b, and c will too. If you've never doubted your husband until this thread...don't do your marriage a disservice by letting this thread ruin a bond of trust that you have made.

Good luck!

Edited by LisaD, 22 July 2007 - 11:12 AM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-07-22 11:10:00

And speaking of jealousy....

I think it's strange how 'feeling jealousy' equates to categorical proof that a marriage is real....if that were true, I can see where some might go looking for perceived jealousies where there are none.
________________

Oh, and no jealousy in my experiences...I am olive skinned and in the NE England, I do stand out (much like another poster with a Scottish partner)....anyways, I was welcomed into D's area with open arms by everyone. They are all like a second family to me.

People did comment about my American-ness...one guy used to call me 'Miami' when he saw me....another friend of mine (he's nuts) used to hug me and say 'Hello my favorite American'...and when Little Britain came out, it was a running joke that I *was* the only American in the village....but it was all in good fun and done with the best of intentions. After a couple of years there, when someone new would hear my accent and freak out a bit, it was like 'yeah yeah I'm American, get over it' :lol:

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-08-06 22:39:00

I gotta say Thanks to you all

QUOTE (sarah and hicham @ Aug 22 2007, 10:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (sarah and hicham @ Aug 22 2007, 07:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (AInfante-Saraireh @ Aug 22 2007, 07:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Haven't been around much, working so much these days. So Demabrook went back to her husband? And why? What was the catch 22?

I don't know.... it makes me sad though for her and her husband.

replace husband with children!

I was gonna say!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-08-22 22:15:00

I gotta say Thanks to you all

If Dee went back, whether anyone agrees or not, that's her choice alone...no one held a gun to her head.

I am concerned about the children though....are they ok? They don't have a choice in this, so I hope if Dee went back, she made alternate arrangements for the children.....

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-08-22 21:24:00

MENA sensitive poll regarding Do or Don't Tell

I'd tell, but have no expectations of the woman believing it. We all see how selectively blind self-delusion can be sometimes!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-08-20 11:54:00

Internet Casanova's

QUOTE (tammy sue kay @ Sep 4 2007, 12:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

In no way was I questioning other peoples responses. We are all different people, so of course we would make different choices. I guess my point was, people grow and change.
I have an aunt and uncle who married while still young, in the sixties. They will be the first to tell you they were not in love when they married. They married for convenience, but after many years of marriage they are still together, take care of each other, and the other is the first in their minds. I know of another couple that seperated because of the mans alcohlism, yet when she developed a brain tumor and the operation disabled her to the point she could not take care of herself, he was there. He fed her, bathed her, changed her diapers, until she passed away.

I guess love means different things to different people. Most of the men and women from the MENA countries want to leave to go to something better, and I have to say I don't blame them. I would never intentionally marry someone to help them get a green card, but have to wonder if that is not the first thought in their mind when they contact anyone in the more profitable countries.
Not to say that all the MENA/US marriages are based on the green card, but I think that does play into it from the very beginning.

The issue is not really so much the 'love' aspect, rather the whole 'he lied and told her he was in love fo x amt of time' issue.

Well, the way I see it anyways....

Two ppl getting married sayin 'ok it's not love, but we'll grow together' is wayyyyyyyyy different than telling a woman you love her so that she can petition you for what will ultimately be a GC. Wayyy different!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-09-04 11:14:00

Internet Casanova's

Well, the last thing I'd do is get him the path to that gc before I'm really certain if he's shootin straight dice or not.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-09-03 21:49:00

hello everyone

Glad to hear the kids are well....good luck to you!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-08-22 22:50:00

MENA Abuse Poll~~Please keep in MENA

If there is a high % that have been abused in the past by their American ex-SOs, I think there's got to be a link somewhere.

I know many American women, only a few with emotional abuse issues....a high % here on VJ must reflect something....but what?

Could it be that with petitioning a foreign SO, that the woman is in the 'driver's seat' as far as having some control in the relationship?

I dunno....but it's pretty interesting.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-08-15 15:52:00

Mena Divorce

QUOTE (moody @ Sep 19 2007, 10:14 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

This is the reason why I didn't involve my children in this process (never talked to them about it) or with my husband really until I knew for sure he was coming. My sons knew about Moh, they talked to him on the phone a few times but he wasn't involved in their lives until he got here. I didn't want them to feel how I was feeling (hurt, impatient, stressed). My sons have a dad but even if they didn't I wouldn't make Moh their "replacement" dad. Especially if they never met him and didn't really know him. IMO that's just messing with kids' heads. Making a step dad a "replacement" dad takes time. The step dad has to earn the respect and love of the children. This can't be done over the phone and through chats and webcams. It can't even be done by a short term visit overseas.

Seriously, thank you for this post. You have said in here what I have always wanted to say countless times on VJ...

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-09-19 09:40:00

MENA Breakups

I'm of the notion that no one will learn anything, I'm afraid.

The heart wants what it wants....and most of us are here long enough to see that there could be a relationship where every one of us would be 'omG what a mess!', yet that petitioner won't see a thing. Or won't acknowledge a thing...

Everyone here might get a little nervous and whatnot when hearing about horror stories...but the ones who are really snowed will never think anything's wrong with their relationship.

Yanno...'there are none so blind as those who do not see' and all that jazz........

Good luck!

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-18 10:48:00

QUOTE (doodlebug @ Oct 18 2007, 03:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (i adore you @ Oct 18 2007, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Playing the opposite side of thoughts for a moment, how many times have people said 'what is wrong with having the goal of coming to America'-so long as you do not do it where fraud is involved. So if his intention is to come to America and he honestly loves Aimee then what is so terribly wrong? The fact the Heather passes away (bless her soul)?

Well maybe the fact that the FBI is still (or as of early october) investigating the true cause of death?

omG are you serious?

Wow.

Edited by LisaD, 18 October 2007 - 02:32 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-18 14:32:00

QUOTE (i adore you @ Oct 18 2007, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Awfully convenient to 'fall in love' when the GOAL is to come to America.

Too true, Tmma.....v good points

Edited by LisaD, 18 October 2007 - 02:24 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-18 14:23:00

QUOTE (moody @ Oct 18 2007, 03:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Now he's on his second ticket. I pray to God that man never sets foot in this country.

QUOTE (i adore you @ Oct 18 2007, 03:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (doodlebug @ Oct 18 2007, 02:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Didn't he try to get to the US by using Heather's daughter? How long after that fell through did he meet you?

He had a way to America-Heather...people die...mysteriously or not...she was his ticket to America

Well, Heather, her child, and now Badr'sLove...

that's three

Edited by LisaD, 18 October 2007 - 02:12 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-18 14:12:00

I feel very uncomfortable with airing the personal business of a deceased woman. It may or may not even be true.

Edited by LisaD, 18 October 2007 - 02:11 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-18 14:06:00

In Memory of Heather

What a beautiful and tragic poem.

Heather, may you rest in peace.

Edited by LisaD, 18 October 2007 - 02:57 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-18 14:56:00

My journey with a Moroccan is over

QUOTE (mybackpages @ Oct 25 2007, 11:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

WOW it has taken some time to get through this thread and the only thing I can add is I am sorry for both sides n this relationship.

Most of us have been in relationships before this one and we know how difficult it can be when a relationship is going sour.

I just dont get the "oh he kissed a woman and he is sooo evil" logic. I am not going to defend this action as acceptable, but i also know we make mistakes all the time as humans. Dont give me all that "he's Muslim so he knows better" ...what is that suppose to mean anyway? Don't Chirstain men know better too? Even an athesist knows not to cheat on his wife!

I think what we see happening here is the result of many factors and more common than we ever want to admit.

This is not about the green card. This is about a marriage failing. Notice I didnt say failed. Sometimes we work through these difficulties and sometimes we dont.

I suspect that what happened here is that the USC had a certain expectation in her mind and finds herself now extreemly disappointed that her dream was nto the reality.
I also suspect that he has certan expectations in his mind and foundhimself in a situation that he did not expect and made choices which i hope he is not proud of, but we are not talkign about battering his wife. We are talkign about staying outside of the marriage committment. Straying when the marriage is already sour. Its never right, but come on, you all want to lynch him over this?

Despite Spartacus's really dopey remark about women being slaves in Morocco (YEP maybe ne of the dopiest things I have ever read) , he is right when he says take this a lessonin cultural differences.

Both the USC and the the nonUSC have to understand that they are choosing to marry outside of their cultural norm. Each side can have very different values regarding use of language, family and otehr social relationships, expectatins of husband and wife roles, types of food and living conditions for evert day living..etc...all of this can cause a disconnect when the couple finally moves intogether.

So many women on this board tlak only of love and how love conquers all...but that is just BS....if you do nto unertand and agree to asic common values and expectations, this is the reality of what can happen.

QFT

Edited by LisaD, 25 October 2007 - 02:19 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-25 14:19:00

My journey with a Moroccan is over

Look, I am not justifying anything here, but at the end of the day...a husband who feels shut out and emotionally isolated and a wife who is betrayed by his disloyalty is not something that only happens to mixed-nationality couples....or something that is specific to Moroccan men. I always hate when people justify things like 'well yeah, but it is worse elsewhere' or something like that....but let's try not to tar the OP's husband with the brush of other people's exes.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-24 20:13:00

My journey with a Moroccan is over

OP, I am so sorry you are going through this!

I agree with MrsAmera and we have 2day....none of us really know what has happened, one way or another, and something as complicated as marital trouble cannot be figured out in a thread. And it's not really for us to judge anyway.

I wish both the OP and her husband the strength to get through this the best way they can...whether it leads them back together, or keeps them amicable enough to raise their child together, but separate. Sometimes love is crazy and dysfunctional and hearts have a way of making us do really stupid things. That's why there are erasers on pencils....cos none of us are perfect!

Good luck to both of you

Edited by LisaD, 24 October 2007 - 07:38 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-10-24 19:36:00

Aaaaand it's Friday

QUOTE (just_Jackie @ Nov 4 2007, 01:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Evil cows? that's funny. Anyone have a visual for that?

Jackie

here's a funny shower cap...although who wears shower caps anymore? lol

shower cap didn't load, so I had to photobucket it:

and my fave though small:

Edited by LisaD, 04 November 2007 - 01:34 PM.

Anita Cocktail

Male

2007-11-04 13:32:00