ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & ProceduresHow to present photos in I-129F package...(first post!)
I printed out 4 pics to a page of 8.5 x 11 photo paper. I didn't even cut them. I put lil labels at the bottom of each pic like 'London, x/x/xxxx'

I had like 3 full pages...I put them in the plastic sleeve that the blank photo paper packet was wrapped in.
Anita CocktailMale02008-02-18 12:10:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & ProceduresUnique request?
QUOTE (pushbrk @ Jul 24 2008, 10:28 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (ruryan @ Jul 23 2008, 09:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Happy Bunny @ Jul 23 2008, 11:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (ruryan @ Jul 23 2008, 11:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We have no intention of marrying each other but it seems the only way I can bring her with me is a K1.


Filing for a K1 considering with what you said above constitutes fraud. And if you plan on going back to the Ukraine, come to the US, do the class, then return to your girlfriend and the Ukraine.

Good luck!


ok well... maybe its "fraud" but I dont see it that way. they really dont leave us any other option?????


Sorry but it's now time to think and behave like an honest adult. Of course there's another option. She stays in Ukraine and you don't get what you want.

It takes three hours to drive from my home to Seattle. If I only allow 2.5 hours for the trip, speed and get pulled over, should I tell the officer I don't see it as speeding because the State didn't leave me any choice?

There comes a time in life when most people realize that the almighty "I want" is not so almighty as they might have thought. You have an opportunity for now to be that time.

Welcome to our world, the world of loving a foreigner.



QFT.


and as an aside...I love how fraud is in quotes, lol.
Anita CocktailMale02008-07-24 21:34:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & ProceduresUnique request?
QUOTE (ruryan @ Jul 23 2008, 11:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We have no intention of marrying each other but it seems the only way I can bring her with me is a K1.


Filing for a K1 considering with what you said above constitutes fraud. And if you plan on going back to the Ukraine, come to the US, do the class, then return to your girlfriend and the Ukraine.

Good luck!

Edited by Happy Bunny, 23 July 2008 - 11:10 PM.

Anita CocktailMale02008-07-23 23:09:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & ProceduresMy K1 Visa rejected - will return back to u.s.
The misunderstanding is what prompted the OP and his beneficiary to lie. They are separate.

Get a lawyer or don't....but no congressman/woman is going to take up your cause when you clearly got busted misrepresenting facts to USCIS.
Anita CocktailMale02008-02-18 12:18:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Proceduresengagement
As it's a fiance(e) visa, the answer is yes.

It's not defined by a ring, it's the intent to marry which defines the engagement....

mox beat me to it almost verbatim!
Anita CocktailMale02008-12-23 15:18:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & ProceduresPosting Safety at VisaJourney
First of all, I think that there are many an answer that can be found with the search feature.

But we're all here to question one thing or another...who cares if someone's going to say something negative? (S)he is the one who will look foolish, not the other way around. A topic is a great way for checks & balances...for correcting wrong or outdated information, to open a discussion for people who are in the same situation, or even as a way to keep information on that particular subject in the archives...so the next person who comes along with the same questions can have a starting point, and also not feel so bad in starting his/her own thread if need be.
Anita CocktailMale02007-03-03 17:32:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Bob & Kim @ Oct 26 2007, 05:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Seattle2Cebu @ Oct 26 2007, 10:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
you got her number... some people like to pick fights to get attention I think

QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 25 2007, 11:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (babblesgirl @ Oct 25 2007, 06:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm done smile.gif

Me too. I've said everything I have to say, and I tried to present it in a clear and reasonable manner. However, you and LisaD insist on manipulating it to fit your little zingers and sound bites so that you can trade smug little comments between each other. If you were really willing to listen to and comprehend what I and others have said, rather than deliberately misunderstanding, you might still not agree with it, but at least your opinions would at least be a little more informed. I can respect honest disagreements, but I cannot respect deliberate miscomprehension.



The proof is in the pie...pumpkin that is laughing.gif shocked.gif

POST #9 HERE...
http://www.visajourn...showtopic=93368


Hi it's called sarcasm laughing.gif good.gif

Cos if you think this was even moderately my attempt at a flame war, you are SADLY mistaken. laughing.gif laughing.gif laughing.gif

Edited by LisaD, 26 October 2007 - 05:10 PM.

Anita CocktailMale02007-10-26 17:08:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (devilette @ Oct 25 2007, 10:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So, let me get this straight...if you are arrogant, condescending & judgemental to a poster here on VJ - and someone else agrees with you - they get a shout out in the thread. How incredibly immature.


*checks Dev's posts*

seems so!

*latherrinserepeat*
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 21:58:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (steve55 @ Oct 25 2007, 09:43 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Legally, as per the USCIS view, you are right Lisa.



Thx!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 21:00:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
BG RAWKS! heh
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 20:42:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (steve55 @ Oct 25 2007, 09:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So LIsa, will you be emailing the VISA JOURNEY owners to correct their erroneous info??? You can send them your picture link here with your evidence of what the USCIS says about it. Hmmmmm?? They may listen to you yes.gif


Actually, I will...I don't think there should be any 'official' information on this site which contradicts the USCIS site. Whether or not E agrees will remain to be seen.

Thx for reminding me!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 20:20:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Mister Fancypants @ Oct 25 2007, 08:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This is about the most embarrassing displays of backslapping I've seen here on VJ....holy moses... blink.gif


*yawn*
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 20:09:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Bob & Kim @ Oct 25 2007, 08:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (archie07 @ Oct 25 2007, 07:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (LoriLawless @ Oct 25 2007, 07:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Do you know her phone number???



Yeah, I vote that we get the orange and black paints and paint her @ss and insert it on every other post in this thread!


But it would make such a smaller pumpkin! laughing.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 20:07:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (devilette @ Oct 25 2007, 07:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Seattle2Cebu @ Oct 25 2007, 04:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If Hillary gets elected it wont matter anyways... Im moving to the P.I for at least 4 years


kicking.gif laughing.gif


You're not judging him now, are you dev?
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 18:36:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Jamie76 @ Oct 25 2007, 07:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 25 2007, 06:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
As if anyone is without judgment!

Judgment=opinion

We all have em good.gif


I am of the opinion that I don't judge. good.gif


the word 'judge' has gotten a bad rap! Cos I really doubt there's anyone without opinions.....
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 18:22:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
As if anyone is without judgment!

Judgment=opinion

We all have em good.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 18:13:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
Ok, let's do it this way.

Have the non-USC go into the interview and say that the USC is going to use the 90 days to 'get to know' the fiance and see what happens.

Seriously, this is really a no brainer and oh so ridiculous that this is still up for interpretation.
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 15:19:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (rebeccajo @ Oct 25 2007, 03:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 25 2007, 03:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
But that's the thing....while mostly everything you said is 100% factually accurate, I have to disagree with the last 2 lines. It's not a personal opinion that a K-1 is not a 'get to know you' visa.


If you can show me in the Code where it's prohibited, I'll concede.


Well I showed you where it's written in black and white on the USCIS website. If that's not enough, then I dunno what to tell ya.

Edited by LisaD, 25 October 2007 - 02:47 PM.

Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 14:46:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (rebeccajo @ Oct 25 2007, 03:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (babblesgirl @ Oct 25 2007, 03:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (pushbrk @ Oct 25 2007, 07:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (PEGGY @ Oct 25 2007, 11:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I knew my husband for almost two years before I moved to the USA.

We were lucky to get to see each other every three months. When I came to the USA to live, I thought we should still wait almost until the 90 days were up just to see how we all (blended family) got along living in the same house. I didnt make that decision because I didnt love my fiancee. I did it to see how things went with us all living together. Having to live with someone is totally different then visits from each other. We all get caught up in the romance on those visits. If anyone says that dont they are full of themselves.

I just didnt want to come here and get married 2 days later just so I could get my AOS sent out so I could start working. That was not our plan.

Everyones plan is different

Thats my opionion


Yes, plans and circumstances vary. Yours seem perfectly reasonable. However, I didn't notice anything about stroke loggers and other snooping. I take it also that your plan was a mutual decision, not an "audition".


It really makes no difference whether you choose to marry on day 1 or day 89 as long as, like you have said, there is a mutual respectful intent to your decision.

I have no objection to someone who has a mutual agreement with their partner to take time to see how well things fit once they are together on the K1 - although I still think that 90 days is going to be a bit of a push to arrange weddings and work out whether full adjustment is going to take place.

What concerns me about the thread is that it has evolved into a disagreement on the terms of the K1. I object to the notion that 'the intent to marry' is not a prerequisite for filing the K1 in the first place.


I'm not sure that is what is being debated.

There's a debate about whether it's RIGHT to use 'intent to marry' when actually there may be a 'test drive' in mind.

Everybody's definition of 'intent' is going to be different. You can intend to cross the street at a certain juncture in the road, but decide at the last minute to walk down another block or two before you actually cross over.

The bottom line is - if both people had intent - but the marriage never takes place and the beneficiary returns to their native country before 90 days is up, there is no 'lawbreaking' going on.

It might not be the grooviest thing in the world, and USCIS sure doesn't want to advocate people use the visa as a 'get to know you' thing, but the fact remains that no LAW has been broken if the marriage doesn't occur and the foreign intended goes home in a timely manner.

Beyond that, I don't think we as members here can advocate or advise anything else. Without interjecting our personal opinions, that is.


But that's the thing....while mostly everything you said is 100% factually accurate, I have to disagree with the last 2 lines. It's not a personal opinion that a K-1 is not a 'get to know you' visa.

Edited by LisaD, 25 October 2007 - 02:36 PM.

Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 14:36:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (rebeccajo @ Oct 25 2007, 03:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We moved. Cardboard boxes, paint and sawdust are taking up too much of my time at the moment.


Well congrats and best of luck in your new home. smile.gif It's been a long haul, I'm sure you're thrilled it's finally over!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 14:27:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (rebeccajo @ Oct 25 2007, 03:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (debeselizz @ Oct 25 2007, 02:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
did the OP even come back to read the thread he started?


you know, when we just started doing the whole petitioning thing, i was afraid and had no idea what to expect. Yes we were in love, but the fact that we are so far apart made me seriously paranoid. But that is where trust comes in. after more than a year of just chatting online as friends, i think i had an idea of what kind of person he is and learned to trust him.
the 90 day period was never a period where i thought i could change my mind or maybe "test" if this is working out at all. i stepped into this knowing i want to spend the rest of my life with him. The amazing thing is - we are still getting to know each other. we have been married for 3 years and i have never been happier. with all the bad habits both of us have, i still am 100% sure nothing can stop us from making it work.
i think marriage has a better chance of surviving if you really take time in trying to know each other better before you sign any petition. for your own good!

we all have our own ideas of how to make your relationship work. rushing into it is not going to help any ways, but also delaying the wedding after your loved one is already here, after all this USCIS hell, is not fear either. having a doubt at that point is a big, RED flag in my opinion.


Simona


Good to see you around.......


Hell, Becs it's good to see YOU around. Where have ya been?
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 14:13:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Ionescu @ Oct 25 2007, 03:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jundp @ Oct 25 2007, 02:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Ionescu @ Oct 25 2007, 11:46 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jundp @ Oct 25 2007, 02:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'd personally just like to get to the 90 days!

And PS I find the pumpkin azz annoying and juvenile, so I turned photos off (thanks to whomever taught me how!)

yea, announcing you hate the pumpkin butt was immature and mean, all you had to do was turn off pics, no need to announce why you did it good.gif


Why? People enjoy going on and on around here about "TOS" etc. I find that having a naked rear end in a photo to be cutting quite close to that. Every day I find that there are many examples of rudeness and juvenile behavior on this site. I truly don't feel that my announcement was either. I am also not alone in my opinion, which is why I stated it. I stated nothing directly at the user, only at her choice of photos. You're right, I could have not said anything. But it appears on this site that some people are allowed to say what they choose and others are not. Not cool in my book. good.gif

aham, its not naked smile.gif
oh and heres a tissue for your tears good.gif


you made me lol Tara heart.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 14:12:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (jundp @ Oct 25 2007, 02:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Ionescu @ Oct 25 2007, 11:46 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jundp @ Oct 25 2007, 02:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'd personally just like to get to the 90 days!

And PS I find the pumpkin azz annoying and juvenile, so I turned photos off (thanks to whomever taught me how!)

yea, announcing you hate the pumpkin butt was immature and mean, all you had to do was turn off pics, no need to announce why you did it good.gif


Why? People enjoy going on and on around here about "TOS" etc. I find that having a naked rear end in a photo to be cutting quite close to that. Every day I find that there are many examples of rudeness and juvenile behavior on this site. I truly don't feel that my announcement was either. I am also not alone in my opinion, which is why I stated it. I stated nothing directly at the user, only at her choice of photos. You're right, I could have not said anything. But it appears on this site that some people are allowed to say what they choose and others are not. Not cool in my book. good.gif


No, people are going on about USCIS...not VJ TOS.

If you have a problem with it, instead of doing the juvenile smack talk....report it. Or even better yet, you could have asked me politely to remove it.

And if you were *that* insulted to begin with...I notice my inbox doesn't have a pm from you nor does this thread have a simple 'would you please remove that as it offends me?'

No, instead you want to talk about how juvenile and whatnot it is, and publicly state how your siggys are turned off because of it. All you forgot to say was 'neener neener'

wink.gif

Edited by LisaD, 25 October 2007 - 02:07 PM.

Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 14:07:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Ionescu @ Oct 25 2007, 02:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
i came in late, which is unusual, but i wanna know what the argument is all about........

its simple, the 90 days is not to be used to get to know someone you already claim to love and want to marry, that shouldve been taken care of long before coming on VJ and filing a k1 visa.

what is there to argue about?


As usual Tara, you are able to see thru all the mucky muck wink.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 13:41:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 25 2007, 01:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 25 2007, 10:10 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
it's my black-or-white-come-hell-or-high-water attitude towards the guidelines for eligibility for a visa. And we can debate this six ways from Sunday, but the end result is the same:

// image not quoted to save space //

That much IS black and white. Oh, and yellow and red in case anyone's confused what exactly I'm referencing.

First, the web citation is from a FAQ. It is guidance, nothing more. It is not legally binding. It was written by a bureaucrat, not a lawmaker.

And I just have to ask: why do you care? Why do you feel so strongly about a relationship that 2 consenting adults enter into? Once the beneficiary enters the country, they have 90 days to either marry or leave the country. Why should it be any business of yours what happens in between, or what those 2 consulting adults thought process is?


Why do you care about what I care about? tongue.gif See, we can do this all day. But the reason why I care is already outlined in my several posts in this thread. This community cannot endorse going against the guidelines of the visa.

And I lolled at your 'it was written by a beaurocrat not a lawmaker' line. Justify it anyway you want, chief! But it isn't called a 'FACT sheet' for the hell of it.





QUOTE (Drew and Tik @ Oct 25 2007, 01:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Does everyone on VJ play World of Warcraft? Haha

PS - 70 Blood Elf Paladin, but account on hold no0pb.gif


Nope, not everyone! heh
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 12:51:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (ramos96 @ Oct 25 2007, 01:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A little bit of both actually, and I have to agree with the OP, I do agree your signature picture does suck, looking at somebody's painted azz does get old considering how much you like to post. I wonder if there is any rule in regards to an offensive photo in a signature, cause yours is pretty close to bordering on that in my opinion. And please before you flame me LisaD, don't make me make a poll post, I am more than happy to show you I am not that the only one that thinks this.

Humbly,
Ramos



I'm not flaming you at all...it's a legitimate question.
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 12:33:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (ramos96 @ Oct 25 2007, 01:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You know instead of arguing about all this, there are homes in Louisiana and Mississippi that need to get re-built. There are people that need counseling and there are fire lines we all could be helping with.

Ramos


Aren't you too busy building your guild, or do you help rebuild homes too?
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 12:22:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (HannahP @ Oct 25 2007, 01:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 25 2007, 11:30 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Learning little things about your spouse is a helluva lot different to bringing over a practical stranger and keylogging the puter to 'make sure you know what you're getting' yes.gif


Learning *little* things? I wouldn't consider "are we as fundamentally compatible in practice as we are in theory?" to be a little thing!

The only person who advocated anything close to bringing over a practical stranger and keylogging their computer would be the OP -- but this thread has morphed way beyond that. Not everyone has the same black-or-white-come-hell-or-high-water attitude that you do towards a relationship. (And whether you want to address the issue or not, only a small percentage of us get to live with our SO for any prolonged period of time before the visa. Many people here /do/ only know their SO for a short period of time; many only meet once or twice before choosing to marry.)


No, YOU said that after x amt of years with your husband, you are still learning things. Those are what I call 'little'. I would say that the stuff you might learn down the road after being together a long period of time is 'little' as opposed to learning who a person fundamentally is and wanting to marry them. You know, learning whether or not the person you love is trustworthy? That's the big stuff IMO.

This conversation has NOT morphed into something different...maybe you feel it has, and if so, that's great for you. And you also misunderstand that what we're discussing here is NOT my 'black-or-white-come-hell-or-high-water attitude towards a relationship'

it's my black-or-white-come-hell-or-high-water attitude towards the guidelines for eligibility for a visa. And we can debate this six ways from Sunday, but the end result is the same:



That much IS black and white. Oh, and yellow and red in case anyone's confused what exactly I'm referencing.
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 12:10:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (HannahP @ Oct 25 2007, 12:23 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Unlike, I think, the vast majority of people on this forum, I had the good fortune to be able to live with my husband for two years before we were married. Our honeymoon phase easily out-lasted those first ninety days.

Yet even having known each other for years before we first moved in together - visiting every few weeks, chatting online every day - we had so much to learn about each other. We were still learning after ninety days; we're still learning after 2.5 years of 'round the clock face-to-face time. The learning and the growing never stops. So the whole argument seems moot because any relationship/marriage is going to be a continuous, fluid process.


I lived with my SO for 3 before we got engaged. Was it easy to uproot myself to go follow my heart? Absolutely not. But before I would ever dream of turning his world upside down by having him leave everything he knows, we were going to make sure that this is what we were going to do.

Learning little things about your spouse is a helluva lot different to bringing over a practical stranger and keylogging the puter to 'make sure you know what you're getting' yes.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 11:30:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 25 2007, 10:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Unfortunately any real discussion in this thread is going to be stifled by the fact that there are a couple people here who are so fundamentalist in their belief that there is only one way to do it, and if you don't do it their way you are a selfish greedy ####### who uses women like kleenex. They refuse to see beyond their own experiences.

There are as many ways to enter a relationship as their are people. If two consenting adults want to "see if it's going to work out," then who the hell are we to question that? As long as they did it legally, what's the problem? Frankly I could give a ####### what the government's "intent" is with regards to the K-1 visa. The government have shown their ineptitude and poor judgment at every step of the way when it comes to immigration, so pardon me if I don't feel like their opinion about what the 90 days should be used for is worth the paper it's written on. Signing a letter of intent, with the intention of seeing if it's going to work out, is not visa fraud. Maybe it is in the strictest most puritan sense, but certainly not in a moral sense.

We are all adults. We enter into relationships as adults, and hopefully we are both honest and upfront with each other. If one or both of the partners is being dishonest, then you have bigger problems than worrying about how to use the 90 days.


There IS only ONE WAY TO DO IT! lolz

As everyone else said, two adults going into this thinking 'ok I'll come over(non USC) and we'll plan on marrying, but we'll see what happens as far as my ability to stay there permanently' and a USC bringing over a foreign fiance to vet before marriage while the fiance gives up everything on the notion that they ARE getting married are

TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.

You talk about 'as long as it's done legally' and then go on to say you don't give a ####### what the government's guidelines are for the visa. It's not their 'opinion'....it's the framework for eligibility. If you want to disregard that...well that's really fine...but at the end of the day, don't make lawbreakng out to be some 'let's fight the man cos he says I should like pink!' bollocks.

Now we can play semantics with this for the next week, but those are the facts. We've been debating what the 90 days is for, and I've put that to bed straight from the horse's mouth. Now, if the conversation is going to change about how the 'gov't has no right'...well, then this just turned into an even sillier conversation than it was before.

I mean, I'm not even going to get into the 'where's the common sense?' discussion of how anyone could uproot another individual based on a promise to marry when that USC doesn't even feel he knows the fiancee well enough. I'm not even going to get into the 'how on earth can anyone here petition another human being that they have only spent a week or two with'. I can't even comprehend how a couple with no common language and maybe only a week together in person can say they know each other well enough to even feel comfortable enough to file a petition. I mean focking hell...these foreign SOs are not chattel to be shipped over and returned within the 90 day warranty period because they're faulty!!!!

But those are my personal opinions, and not entirely germane to the conversation of to what purpose the K-1 is for as laid out by USCIS.

QUOTE (freecake @ Oct 25 2007, 11:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm going to have to agree with moxcamel....:
"Unfortunately any real discussion in this thread is going to be stifled by the fact that there are a couple people here who are so fundamentalist in their belief that there is only one way to do it, ...."

Consider for a moment that we're a very, very diverse group of people here. Some people have lived together a long time and this visa is just a formality. Less fortunate of us have been able to visit and maintain a relationship long distance. Even less fortunate have met once but it is in the cards for marriage. None of us can know what will go down in that 90 days.
Now personally I'm certain that my relationship will become a marriage. I applied for the visa with the intention that this was my fiance and nothing is going to move that. but none of us know 100% for certain that nothing will happen in that time between arrival and marriage. none of us know that once married, everything will be happy and skippy and perfect or disasterous.
i think that there's some very small-mind thinking going on about one way being right or wrong. this conversation has become very 'black and white.'
do i personally think that the K1 is for people intending already to get married? YES. that is what USCIS has designed it for. Do i think that any one of us could get our fiance here and have a falling out before marriage.
yes, i certainly do.
as negative as it seems.


Of course things happen that sometimes prevent the marriage of a mixed nationality couple who obtained their K-1 under lawful means and with clear intent. And no one here is saying that intent can't change. I suppose that one could see a side to their partner that they don't want to put up with, and decide to call the marriage off.....hell, that stuff happens all the time with 'normal' marriages too. But what you're failing to understand is that INTENT is everything to USCIS....

For instance...unrelated to the K-1....if one of our SO's were over visiting on holiday and fully INTENDED to go back home, but after arrival the couple decides to get married and file for AOS...that's acceptable. However, if the INTENT was to do so before arrival, that person IS NOT ELIGIBLE for AOS. I dunno about you, but to me, that speaks volumes about how weighted INTENT is.

Back to this conversation, I guess then it comes into 'well how can you really prove intent?' and I suppose we could talk til the end of time about that. However, FOR ME....if those are the parameters that the gov't has set, then that's what I will comply with. Each individual person can certainly play fast and loose with their own petition.....but that is a personal choice, and the risk lies solely with that person. However, as a visa community, members here CANNOT ALLOW advocating going outside of the parameters of the visa guidelines.

So basically, if one is going to use this as a dating visa....then

A- At least acknowledge to one's self that you are directly going against gov't guidelines for this visa
and
B-Don't go on a visa website chuntering on about how you're essentially commiting visa fraud. When you write that letter of intent to the gov't saying 'I PLAN TO MARRY WITHIN 90 DAYS' know that the letter does NOT have a little * at the bottom saying *providing I get to know my fiancee well enough
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 11:27:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 25 2007, 08:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (steve55 @ Oct 25 2007, 03:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
BUt, even this very website VISA JOURNEY says the following about the K-1

May allow for a "get to
know your fiance better"
period before marriage,
since the visa is good
for 90 days.

So,.....lisa, why dont you send the owners of this forum an email and correct their erroneous ways of thinking?? (LOL). he he he. Sorry babe, but the writing's on the wall,..so to speak smile.gif


Straight from USCIS....yellow and red emphasis mine



http://www.uscis.gov.../article/A2.pdf

kthxbye!



Oh, I forgot to add: I'm not your babe, steve55.
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 07:47:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (steve55 @ Oct 25 2007, 03:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
BUt, even this very website VISA JOURNEY says the following about the K-1

May allow for a "get to
know your fiance better"
period before marriage,
since the visa is good
for 90 days.

So,.....lisa, why dont you send the owners of this forum an email and correct their erroneous ways of thinking?? (LOL). he he he. Sorry babe, but the writing's on the wall,..so to speak smile.gif


Straight from USCIS....yellow and red emphasis mine



http://www.uscis.gov.../article/A2.pdf

kthxbye!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-25 07:15:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Oct 24 2007, 04:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Seattle2Cebu @ Oct 24 2007, 01:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
wish you could pick out something better to look at than something that points to a big ###

ur fcked in the head lady

given line two, maybe you can give her a pic of yourself to replace that pumpkin with? whistling.gif


I'mma stick with the pumpkin butt...it's more pleasing wink.gif

QUOTE (AmericanGentleman @ Oct 24 2007, 04:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Seattle2Cebu @ Oct 24 2007, 04:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think we can get some counseling from the church while
im there.



Sorry if I missed it in the past 8 pages, but why does SHE need counciling?


cos she's with him and he clearly has no respect for what she's giving up to be with him!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 16:10:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
Good catch, Archie! good.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 12:20:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Seattle2Cebu @ Oct 24 2007, 12:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
for those of you who seem to think the foreign fiance is giving up everything...

lets see what are they giving up? some fiances are coming from poor nations... they are giving

up incredibly low pay, bad housing, etc etc etc to make the terrible sacrifice to come to america.

geez.. thats a tough one.


there are many foreign fiances that arent giving up much... and they will do and say anything to get here..

thats just the truth.. most of the people on this forum wont have this problem..


Wow, to get a fiance who looks down on her whole way of life as worthless!



QUOTE (Seattle2Cebu @ Oct 24 2007, 12:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
hmm and that would be why I have paid thousands of dollars in medical care for her parents ?

im a real heartless ####### for sure.




QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 24 2007, 10:27 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 24 2007, 11:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
But to imply that somebody must not love or is not dedicated to their partner because they're going to give their partner the opportunity to adjust is at best naive, and at worst mean spirited.


Talk about taking out of context! hahahahaha

This conversation has NEVER been about giving the partner the 'opportunity to adjust'. This is about people thinking it's ok to treat their fiancees like chattel. To scrutinize them from the second they get here to 'make sure' the USC is not going to get 'burned'. It's deplorable to think that way IMO....especially AFTER the fiancee has given up EVERYTHING to get here.

I said this all yesterday.

But ok, b@lls to the wall time...and I'm never one to mince words so I'll say this: any USC who treats his/her partner like this....like the OP has suggested....is NOT dedicated to his/her partner...more dedicated to getting what they 'ordered'. Any person who doesn't treat his/her partner with the respect that (s)he deserves as ANY HUMAN BEING DESERVES...any person that can JUSTIFY a 'little bit of privacy invasion'....is a sad pathetic & broken excuse for a person and needs a therapist, not a spouse.



So you've bought and paid for the right to invade her privacy? That's interesting!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 12:01:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 24 2007, 12:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (LisaD @ Oct 24 2007, 08:27 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This conversation has NEVER been about giving the partner the 'opportunity to adjust'. This is about people thinking it's ok to treat their fiancees like chattel. To scrutinize them from the second they get here to 'make sure' the USC is not going to get 'burned'. It's deplorable to think that way IMO....especially AFTER the fiancee has given up EVERYTHING to get here.

I can't speak for the OP. I agree that scrutinizing your partner, especially outright spying on them, is one of the worst ways to start a relationship.

However, I think we keep talking past each other. So let me wave the white flag and try this again:

As I mentioned previously, my move to the UK was about as easy a transition to another country a person could ever hope to make. I spent 3 wonderful years there, and if I could go back I would do it in a heartbeat. On the other hand, when I moved to Saudi Arabia, it was like moving to another planet. Nothing could have prepared me for it, and I wound up staying for much less time than I had previously thought. It was just too much of a cultural shift for me. It wasn't just the language, it was pretty much *everything.* (And being an atheist, I wasn't real enamored with a lot of the fundamental decisions that were forced on people, especially women.)

So this is where I'm coming from. If you're from the UK or Canada, your transition to the US is going to be much easier than if you're from Cambodia or Egypt. It's nice to think that love is the only thing we need, but that's just not the case. Russians, for example, are brought up in social circles called a "mir," that they depend on from birth to death, especially if you come from a rural community like my fiance. We really don't have anything like that here in the US, except maybe the Amish communities, and that's not really an apt comparison either. It's not necessarily a physical community, but more of a very tightly knit social network. When they're pulled out of that social structure, it's like losing an appendage. Other cultures, especially Asian and Middle Eastern, have even stronger bonds.

My fiance comes from a rural community. Her family is very important to her. The fact that she's decided to pull up stakes and move 6,000 miles away from everything she knows is an incredible testament to how strong our relationship is. So given that, I like to think that my fiance and I will be happy together for the rest of our lives. I mean, duh, that's why I'm going through this whole agonizing process. But I have to be realistic too, and look at what I'm asking her to give up. It possible, although improbable, that she won't be able to do it. I wish the K1 gave us more time, but I plan on using most of those 90 days to give her as much opportunity as I can to make sure this is the life she wants to live. I am extremely confident that she will choose to stay, but if I didn't give her that opportunity I would feel as if I were being selfish.

And I'm confident that if I were to explain what I just said to an immigration officer at an interview, we would be approved.



You and I are clearly talking about two different things.

No one's making anyone stay despite their wishes.....I mean there's nothing to stop any foreign spouse from returning to his/her country. 90 days, 180 days...it's all immaterial imo when it comes to 'adjustment time'. Some adjustments don't actually come until the foreign spouse gets the greencard/work permit/AP....til they start feeling like less of a prisoner & start feeling more self-reliant. Delaying the marriage to 'test the waters' is selfish and quite cowardly, I'm afraid....because regardless of whether the fiance totally adjusts or not....it's not going to be done and dusted in 90 or 180 days. And they showed their detrimental reliance....reliance on the promise to marry to their detriment by giving up everything they know....so the LEAST anyone can do is make good on the promise. If the marriage doesn't work out later because of a failure to adjust....well, that's nothing like what the OP is afraid of, is it?

Futhermore, it's really silly to think that 1-89 days is going to suss any adjustment issues. If both parties are committed to make it work, I should hope that 89 days is not the threshold to do a runner.

I understand UK/Canada/et al are different...but there ARE adjustment issues even there. It's not all a cake walk there either....for instance...I lived there for 3 years and there were adjustment issues that we dealt with for quite some time. . Those issues didn't make me any less committed to my partner....and I certainly wouldn't have appreciated him coming from the standpoint of 'We'll give it the max time to marry until I can be sure you are going to adjust well here cos I don't want the added hassle of getting a divorce'

And going back to the self-reliance thing...my own adjustment issues started to subside the day I rode the bus by myself for the first time.

When our SOs get here...it's a ticker counting down. And the time we waste on the front end could mean everything. That AOS should be going in ASAP. Our SOs are essentially twisting in the wind without GCs, so the sooner they get them, the better!
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 11:56:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 24 2007, 11:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
But to imply that somebody must not love or is not dedicated to their partner because they're going to give their partner the opportunity to adjust is at best naive, and at worst mean spirited.


Talk about taking out of context! hahahahaha

This conversation has NEVER been about giving the partner the 'opportunity to adjust'. This is about people thinking it's ok to treat their fiancees like chattel. To scrutinize them from the second they get here to 'make sure' the USC is not going to get 'burned'. It's deplorable to think that way IMO....especially AFTER the fiancee has given up EVERYTHING to get here.

I said this all yesterday.

But ok, b@lls to the wall time...and I'm never one to mince words so I'll say this: any USC who treats his/her partner like this....like the OP has suggested....is NOT dedicated to his/her partner...more dedicated to getting what they 'ordered'. Any person who doesn't treat his/her partner with the respect that (s)he deserves as ANY HUMAN BEING DESERVES...any person that can JUSTIFY a 'little bit of privacy invasion'....is a sad pathetic & broken excuse for a person and needs a therapist, not a spouse.

Edited by LisaD, 24 October 2007 - 10:28 AM.

Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 10:27:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Caladan @ Oct 24 2007, 11:13 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hey, he's the one acting like she isn't a person with her own wants and desires, just property, not me.


I am in total agreement, C....my sarcasm wasn't directed at you. no0pb.gif

Babblesgirl....I'm on a roll, eh? laughing.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 10:15:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (Caladan @ Oct 24 2007, 11:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Exactly. It's not a glorified tourist visa.

You can get married toward the end of 90 days if you want, but if you go into the interview and say 'Well, I'm not sure if I want to marry her because I don't actually know if I can trust her not to use me for a green card but I have 90 days to return her if it doesn't work out' I'd bet that doesn't end with a 'sure sir enjoy the 90 days.'

We married around day 60 or 61 of the visa. C. moved down that early because we had to attend (useless) marriage prep classes with the church. We used the time to finish up wedding planning and to set up the apartment.

And no one should say the only basis for marriage must be Western-style love. But keylogging isn't something you do to someone you know, respect, and trust.


There is a 20% restocking fee for all defective returns, mind you wink.gif


*waves* to Babblesgirl! ty smile.gif

Edited by LisaD, 24 October 2007 - 10:12 AM.

Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 10:10:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Process & Procedureshow to best use the 90 days prior to marriage k-1
QUOTE (John and Luda @ Oct 24 2007, 10:59 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Drew and Tik @ Oct 24 2007, 09:43 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (moxcamel @ Oct 24 2007, 10:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Well unless someone can dig the actual intent of the 90 days out of Google or something, I don't think the argument of why there is a 90 day period is going to be settled. I think it can be inferred though, since 90 days is a pretty significant period.


You think 90 days is a significant period of time?

I think what pushbrk said is close to hitting it on the nail. It is very difficult to plan a wedding and get everyone together when you have no idea when your visa will be issued or when your fiancee will be able to be with you. I plan on (hopefully) getting married in less than a year and I don't even know when Tik will be able to move here. I'm sure after she is finally issued the visa many months will have passed and we'll want to be together as soon as possible...that means we have less than 90 days + the time b/t issuance of the visa and her flight to New York to plan a wedding!


I couldn't take anymore of this and had to chime in. I totally agree with Drew and pushbrk, the 90 days isn't designed for you to figure out if you really want to get married or nor not. That decision should have already been made prior to filing the petition. The letter of intent to marry you sign is just that - you're telling the U.S. government you both have a bona fide intent to marry (within 90 days). Maybe you should try writing your letter stating "after a 90 day trial basis with my fiance' we may or may not get married." See how far that goes with the government. Also, lying to them about your true intent is not only unethical, but could also be considered fraud.


blink.gif to Tmma, and everyone else who said the exact same thing as we did tongue.gif tongue.gif tongue.gif
Anita CocktailMale02007-10-24 10:02:00