biggish data

QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 1 2008, 08:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hi Claire. I got up at 4:45 to take Andre to work and make my way here.

I'm a little cranky this morning. I'm sure another shot of caffinated diet coke will fix everything.

Wow!!!! no wonder you are cranky!! Did you get enough sleep last night?

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-10-01 10:55:00

Morning Ladies;

Hey JG and Roxcie. (waving) How are you all doing this hump day? I am off from work today and been up since 4am chatting with my cuz in England on IM.

Hope you all have a wonderful and productive day.

Hey Sunny..

Lawny, that house is might expensive.

Hey Sus

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-10-01 07:11:00

QUOTE (shawn99 @ Sep 30 2008, 11:15 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Clairen, mi luv how yu bias. Yu know seh Roxie statement was wrong and degrading, yet yu prefer if skold mi and mek Roxie get whey scratch free. Even if a yu friend, yu haffi talk di truth. Yu think Clinton, Mcain or Obama would a get whey wid a statement like that. Yu same one would a rail and cuss.

Me a go tap refaree, cause oonu always tink me a tek sides. Wheneva dis cussing start, me try fe beg ooonu fe stap but dem oonu all tun pon me. Onnu go on an nam up each adda. A wha me sey so dat you tink me bias. All me a sey is mek dem ooman express harself and if you no agree, say suh but yuh nuh haffi tek her on and cuss har out. Dat a nuh the solution to the issue.

Each one of us have our opinions about things. Our perception of things are totally different and that is what makes us who we are. If a comment is made and you perceive it as wrong, make your statement and try to correct what you think is wrong. No need to come on here and 'trace' the poster.

I am getting tired of the cussing and tracing. It is absolutely un-necessary. We have enough stress and tribulations in our lives to come on here bashing each other. this one place we all come to to unwind and let off steam but it does not mean we have to 'trace' a person each time their perception of things do not agree with yours.

I understand what Roxcie meant without taking her post literally. She was not being condescending but commenting that the money would be better spent in JA because it would help someone out. Please do not start with me...Like Portia said "Nuh drar me tongue" I try to keep a low profile and I do know many Ja cuss words but I will let you know my mind.

Kimmy I know you said that because Kishmar and I are friends, I came at you. Please go back and re-read what I posted because I addressed my comments at you both. If it was perceived otherwise, I must apologise and shut up my mouth.

Edited by clairern, 30 September 2008 - 11:16 PM.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-09-30 23:15:00

QUOTE (honeychild36 @ Sep 30 2008, 10:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

well i see everyone found there way over here

Mi juss a come

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-09-30 22:03:00

QUOTE (Hotlegz @ Sep 30 2008, 10:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Shawn..1st of all wapen...stop it..it too late fi di argument....I can see how Rox's statement could be taken the wrong way...but u neva affi come off so..u should ask her in what way is she referring and den she woulda clarify..so oonuh stop it !!!

Nite Honey

There i was reading and trying to catch up and was wondering why a moderator was in the house. I thought they were just browsing to see what we talk about to get so many posts in such a short time. Now story come to bump and labrish did a pop

Me caan tek agument dem, yuh knoa. Why can't we express our opinions and reponses without telling each other off?

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-09-30 22:01:00

QUOTE (Mrs. Palmer @ Mar 7 2008, 06:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yaardies!! Any of you going to the Carnival in NY Labor Day weekend? My friends and I (there will probably be 4-5 of us) are planning to come up from NC. It will be our first time in NY AND our first time at CARNIVAL!

For those of you that have been or are in the area, where should we stay? We wanna do other stuff too while we're there...maybe catch a broadway show...we love to eat...We just need to plan ahead, because if we don't, we end up scrambling in the end, and everyone gets all razzled dazzled and exasperated!

Mrs Palmer;

When I lived in Brooklyn, I lived like 5 blocks from Eastern Parkway and went to the carnival every year and have been back once since I moved here. For the past couple of years it has not been a excited as previous years. People misbehave so much and carry weapons, that the police lock it down by 4 pm and most of the floats and bands can't even get on the parkway. I think it a disappointment that WE can't behave better in public and have to have babylon restrict us with batons. My daughter has been going every year since she was 2 years old, but I don't know if she will be going this year. I might try to go and bring Mike for the experience. I will let you know if I am.

Luv
Claire

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-08 18:11:00

QUOTE (Yardiewife @ Mar 7 2008, 07:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Since I won't be on again before you leave...

Have a safe trip Gilly!!! We love you! Good luck on Tuesday!

Yeah, Gill you will be in our thoughts and prayers.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 23:01:00

QUOTE (Mrs. Palmer @ Mar 7 2008, 06:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Question ladies...for those of you who have been separated from your SO/Spouse for a long time, or who will be separated for a while, did you ever consider establishing an account in both your names while they were still in JA? I've been researching the CR-1, and I know one of the "proof of relationship" items is "any joint accounts" between the two of you. I was wondering about this simply because of the distance, and how that would work. I've been thinking of opening a savings account so that we could both put into it, but I'm not sure. And if we did decide to go this route, would it be better to open the account here or down in JA? I know the only bank I've ever seen down there is Scotia Bank...and I live in NC and I know for a fact there is NOT one here!! What do you guys think?

Hey Mrs. Palmer, where in NC are you? I am in Raleigh!!!

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:54:00

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 7 2008, 05:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (brownnskinn @ Mar 7 2008, 05:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jomo @ Mar 7 2008, 03:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (brownnskinn @ Mar 7 2008, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 7 2008, 03:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

mi can't wait for clarien to come wid the topic and the day soon done...so mi have a ???

This is sort of the flip side of most of us ladies were handling our business before we met our s/o. How do u handle that because we have it together sometimes the men, think it's okay to send down unreasonable sums of money to J.A. when mr jengles first came he threw out a three figure amount that he wanted to send down every WEEK. I had to ask him who he wanted to send that too?? It does kill me a little bit, that some people down there don't work and i'm up here busting my butt every day.

I explained to him how much daycare cost, the fact that they we needed a bigger place to live and most importantly...di fact that he didn't have a job or knew how much money he was going to make.

off to a meeting back in a few

Not here, other than to his daughter..who we send $300 a month. No!! When everyone else come begging he usually say no, unless they make him feel really bad, then he'll send 20 bucks here and there.

Can I be nosy and ask how he sends $20?

I hate to send anything less then $100 cause of the fees associated with Western Union.

You have an easier way?

Either western union...10 bucks.... or most of the time he'll put it on his daughters debit card and they have to pick it up

it's with a jamican bank?? someone told me they have a scottia bank here in brooklyn and mr jengles should look into that

I think it on Utica avenue close to citibank, either close to Clarkson/Lenox Roads.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:50:00

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 7 2008, 04:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (JALOVE @ Mar 7 2008, 04:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (IrieCat @ Mar 7 2008, 04:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 7 2008, 04:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (JALOVE @ Mar 7 2008, 04:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 7 2008, 04:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (JALOVE @ Mar 7 2008, 03:43 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

I can't say this loud enough but YES, most jamaican men do not like to be at home, looking after pickney, even if it's theres. they want to work be out the house.

yup that was his response when i asked him. My thoughts were that it may be cheaper for him stay home. Its just a thought. Now if he gets paid like 11.75 im estimating at 40 hours a week that would give about 350 maybe? and that will only just cover daycare and we need a lot more than that im trying figure what cost i will cut to afford daycare and any other expenses right now i have no extra to cover that so i been praying on it and trying find a cheaper place to live.

did u price daycare where u are??? know any older ladies who want to supplement their income??? Is your mother near you she might know someone

When my daughter was in Daycare ... and I even found preschool this way ... I called churches. Both the churches that helped me happen to be Methodist but Church people know people.... They know the community.
Open the yellow pages and call and visit everyone you can.
When I moved back to Maine I cried and cried because I didnt think I could afford it. Even though I work at home I couldnt get work done with a wired kid running around. I eventually found some GREAT care.

You have to hunt the good ones down!

I been crying and cryin too already and baby is nowhere near here yet. Going to do some OT now while i can to try save up some money and finish off my jamaica travel debt and the visa stuff. Im going to start lookign into and call some places. Im still hoping the TX thing will come through for me by summer that will tremendously cut my costs. They need 8 people to leave before i can come. So far one is leaving so now thats 7. Ill keep prayin on it. Ive also been trying to find places here cheaper where i dont have to sign a 12 month lease. Thank you all for ur advice i truly appreciate it, its like noone outside this visa/adjustment process can even begin to understand.

I know u want to transfer thru your job.

have u thought about trying to find a job on your own, after u have the baby. you can apply for jobs from up here thanks to the internet and plan a week and go and interview. that is one of my friends did. companies will/should be flexible if u say i'm coming down this particular week

That's what I did when I was moving from NYC to NC. I went down for two days and set up four interviews. I had my job the summer of 2005 to start Jan 2006.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:39:00

QUOTE (Marlita @ Mar 7 2008, 04:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hey Claire,

Well you've seen my post about Evan getting frustrated and how it was rubbing me the wrong way cause I didnt exactly get it. Well me and him spoke...thru text cause I said we should not talk for a few days. Anyway I'll update you all on that but he enlightened me to alot of stuff that he feels in this whole process and how it is very confusing to him and he's sometimes gets scared about the whole move.

So I think that maybe (not knowing to much about you and Mike) Mike could be coming to terms with leaving his home. i think many times during this journey we the USC or America Resident, don't quite put ourselves in our SO shoes. This can be extremely hard for some of them. For some the move is the best thing ever and they just cant wait to get to the US....for good and bad reasons. For others the thought of mving to a strange place where they know no one really and barely even know you (their SO) can be quote scarely and nerve racking making them not really show excitment about th whole move. If it was me and I was moving to a foreign country away from all the family and friends i ever knew i would be so scared. I think men have a hard time showing how vulnerable they are so sometimes it manifests itself in anger or frustration or non-chalantness, all the emotions that keep them holding their manhood intact. This to us as a woman makes no sense cause we are mush more open about showing these types of emotions to our SO.

Evan an I talked and he finally broke down and told me the real probelm, and its that he says everything in his life has changed since meeting me and know the future in which he imagined has to be shifted to a future in a place and surrounded by people he is not familiar with and sometimes that thoguht make him feel out of control of his life. Could Mike be having some issues like this? I mean essentially you are handling most of the visa work and you have VJ to read and get LOTS of info on this process...your SO doesn't so he is left in the dark not truly understanding what certain things like the police report can mean to the ending of this journey. Maybe the getting of the visa is also bittersweet. My husband has a countdown to when he will finally be with me permanently but he also has a countdown to when he will have to say goodbye to his grandmother, niece, brothers and sisters and it bothers him alot.

I think you should try to pull out the real issue Mike is having cause its apparent he is not telling you something. I wouldnt get to upset about it to the point of making him live with his parents if the 2 of you have a strong commitment to each other and already discussed him living with you. i think you should first start the communication with him before you make the reaction to the situation.

Lita, this is why I am addicted to VJ. The great advice and openmindedness that is offered.

Lita, he had expressed his hesitation to leave home but wanted to so we can be together. He has told me over and over again that he has totally committed himself to me and noone or nothing is going to change that.

The original plan was for him to go to his dad's first, cause he has not seen him and his little sisters in about 6 or so years. He says once he come to me, he is not going to want to leave my side. I am convinced that he loves me but some macho part of him is preventing him from expressing it. Sometimes I think he feels better when I don't call him for a couple of days. He has told me it is harder for him when I express my feelings to him, cause he is not here to hold me and stop the pain.

I am going to call him tomorrow and try to talk to him. He is not a phone person, he is more a writer and expresses himself more in his letters.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:36:00

QUOTE (Jomo @ Mar 7 2008, 04:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I had an ex-BF in JA who would say that I WANT TO SLEEP NOW stuff. It was never good with him. He was just avoiding the issues.

Until you know what's going on in his head, Claire, you probably shouldn't speculate though. This LD thing makes you crazy with speculations.

True dat. Lots going on in my head, but I trust him and you know when the devile seems something good happening, he tends to cast doubts and speculations in our heads. I care for him deeply and respect the type of person that he is. Sometimes I think I am reading too much into things, because I am also scared about the big changes this new venture holds.

I own my home, have a good job and my kids ae grown and my last is in college. Basically alone in my life and live the way I want, how I want since 1998. Now here come a man to want to share that with me, that I have to to learn to live with and adjust my daily habits to. It is sooooo scary.

I am so happy that I have my VJ sistas to talk to. You all are the only ones who understand.

Much love

Claire

QUOTE (tnw @ Mar 7 2008, 04:15 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jomo @ Mar 7 2008, 03:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Claire......

Has he voiced any objections before? About moving to the US, I mean?

Do you think he had an argument or something with his father that could make him hesitant to move?

He could just be scared. It is a big step for anyone.

I think at the very least, you need to have some good sit down, heart to hearts with him to find out what the problem is.
I absolutely think you are in the most perfect situation. With those of us on K-1's & K-3's we are given little time to live together and make that smooth transition from living apart to marrying and being together almost all the time at first. Someone I know was saying she wished they gave us 4 months before the K-1 expired. I said 6 would be even better. The transition is just so sudden and difficult to work with.

Anyhow, I think you are the luckiest girl I have heard of in a long time. Yes, use the time to see how it all flows. That is a brilliant thing to do.

And, no, since his father is directly involved in this one, I think it was appropriate to discuss with him. I am almost thinking you should've said all that to Mike first though. I think I would definately discuss it before he finds out from his father.

True....sounds like he's either anxious or feeling stressed by the whole thing but I agree...Take the time to find out. Going to his dad's might be what u need to put a little distance there so you can see what he really wants and expects and what u want outta this too. I'm sure you wanted more of a reaction outta him based on all the Good News you were trying to give him etc. so hopefully.....It'll all work out for the best over time.

Thanks T

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:20:00

QUOTE (Mrs. Palmer @ Mar 7 2008, 04:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (clairern @ Mar 7 2008, 03:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well guys; I have been logged on all morning but have not been able to catch up with the goings on (I will later). Here is my issue----

Bear with me, this is gonna be long.....sigh

Mike and I were introduced back in March 8 2007 by my sis-in-law. I went to Ja to meet him in April and then again in October. After we met for the first time, it was an instant connection and we found that we had a lot in common in regards to what our expectations are in a relationship. We grew up a couple of miles apart from each other, we are the same age--he is older by 2 months. He is a Seventh-Day Adventist. I was born one. We were both married and are now divorced. We are both educated and have great conversations.

When I visited him, I did what anyone in a relationship would do, brought him gifts (it was around his birthday) and when I got back home and he lost his job after hurricaine Dean, I helped him out financially.

After I met him I found that he was everything I wanted in a life partner. I started to look into this VJ and found this site that offered a wealth of information. As we continued to get to know each other, I told him that I wanted us to be together for the rest of our lives and he told me he wanted the same thing. When I mentioned to him about the ways we could go about achieving that in regards to the fiance visa, he told me that his father had filed a petition for him way back in 2000 and he has not heard anything about it. He went as far as to give me copies of his petition and his father's number and asked that I followup on it for him. That made me really happy because the process was already in place.

After I contacted his father and got his info I called USCIS got his NVC case number, I started to followup and was asked by him after explanation from me, to be his agent. Since then I have taken care of all correspondence to and from NVC and all fees have been paid by me.

I do not know if you all remember how stressed out I was earlier this year, about the DS-230 and police report? Well, we have finally gotten over the hurdle of having case complete.

Well, I called him last night to tell him the good news and he was all nonchalant and not too responsive to me. I asked him if everthing was alright and he said everthing was. I then said what was the matter then and he said "I want to go to sleep". I was very perturbed and pissed off because I find that very unusual a reaction for a situation like this.

Lately, as I stated in some post before, we have not been talking that much. He is hot and cold towards me. when I call him during the day at work, everything is alright and we have a graet conversation. When I call him at night (I try not to call him after 9:30pm--he goes to bed then) he is not too eager to talk to me and I find that disturbing.
I know what all has been said here on VJ and in the past few pages of posts--but I am here wondering what the heck is going on.

I called his father and step-mom last night and told them how I felt and told them that if and when he get the visa, I do not want him to come to my home. They should have him come to Florida and stay a while with them and I will see how things are and waht happens then. I want to wait to see if this behavior is just out of fraustration or what and will things change after he is here.

What do you all think about this and am I wrong in telling his father what I did?

Your thoughts and reaction to this would be really appreciated.

Sorry for the long post, I have no-one else to share things like this with and I am counting on my VJ sistas to give a listening ear and shoulder to lean on

Well, I feel like there could be several things going on here. I know he hasn't said anything yet...but is it possible that he could be going through some family issue or something at work? I know when my husband begins to feel really burdened with frustrations with his family or work, then he can be a bit ornery. And unfortunately, he doesn't let me know right away. I've learned to ask what is wrong, and he will say "everyting's alright", even though I know it's not. But I've learned that he will come to me in his own time, when he's able to talk about what's going on with him. I allow him to have his "man period" every now and then, because I know that I am not always the kindest or best to him when I'm having a hard time, and he gives me the time and space that I need when I need it. We've really gotten good at knowing "when to push and when not to push". If you have a gut instinct that something else may be going on, then by all means...GO WITH YOUR GUT!! I think it's good that he actually has somewhere else to go when he gets here instead of coming directly to your home, but my question is, how far are you from Florida? If/when he does come, do you think that you not allowing him to come to your home will create even more stress and tension? In the end though I think you should do what you feel is best for you and your relationship. And remember that it will all work out the way it is supposed to. I do believe that you should have this conversation with him though and let him know your intentions so there will be NO SURPRISES...and who knows...maybe that will open the door to conversation regarding the difficulties that you have been experiencing lately. Good luck. And I'm here for you!!

Thank you Mrs. Palmer. I sometimes think he is fraustrated and also scared. He got married to this women 10 years ago and she moved to Canada with all promises to file for him and till today, he is still in JA and divirced. I sometimes think he is apprehensive about starting life with someone new not knowing what to expect.

His father lives in Daytona Beach and I live in North Carolina. Couple hours by plane and as I have stated before, they have invited me to come and vist when he gets there so we can have a sit down, whether with him alone or with them in attendance.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:10:00

QUOTE (Jomo @ Mar 7 2008, 03:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Claire......

Has he voiced any objections before? About moving to the US, I mean?

Do you think he had an argument or something with his father that could make him hesitant to move?

He could just be scared. It is a big step for anyone.

I think at the very least, you need to have some good sit down, heart to hearts with him to find out what the problem is.

I absolutely think you are in the most perfect situation. With those of us on K-1's & K-3's we are given little time to live together and make that smooth transition from living apart to marrying and being together almost all the time at first. Someone I know was saying she wished they gave us 4 months before the K-1 expired. I said 6 would be even better. The transition is just so sudden and difficult to work with.

Anyhow, I think you are the luckiest girl I have heard of in a long time. Yes, use the time to see how it all flows. That is a brilliant thing to do.

And, no, since his father is directly involved in this one, I think it was appropriate to discuss with him. I am almost thinking you should've said all that to Mike first though. I think I would definately discuss it before he finds out from his father.

JG, thank you for your openmindednes and great advice. I am happy that you have not voiced what I was thinking. That he might have someone there with him at nights why it's been difficult for him to talk to me.

Initially, when we talked about him coming and the progress of the visa petitoni, I got so excited, but he was like nonchalant and stated that he is not in a hurry to leave JA. He also said that he had a good job and lives in a good home and is among his family that he grew up with. The only good thing that he said was that he wanted to be with me and that makes hime want to move. He wanted to drag thing out a bit longer so maybe he is apprehensive about leaving, uprooting the life that he is used to,to try to adapt to a whole new country, lifestyle and living with a womna after not having done so in years.

Whenever I try to talk to him about the changes that are about to happen, he clams up. His step-mom suggested the same thing that you did. when he comes to Florida, I should come visit him and sit down and talk about the changes and how it is going to affect him and hoe it is making him feel.

Thank you also for saying I am fortunate to be in this situation, cause I feel the same. I want to take that time to get to know him at a closer distance before I make the big step to live with him.

Thank you once again, you smart woman you.

Claire

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 22:00:00

Well guys; I have been logged on all morning but have not been able to catch up with the goings on (I will later). Here is my issue----

Bear with me, this is gonna be long.....sigh

Sorry for the long post, I have no-one else to share things like this with and I am counting on my VJ sistas to give a listening ear and shoulder to lean on

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 15:34:00

QUOTE (IrieCat @ Mar 6 2008, 05:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (brownnskinn @ Mar 6 2008, 04:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Yardiewife @ Mar 6 2008, 05:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Someone muss have a question or dilemma?!? Yuh cousin brodda mother auntie nah have no problems?

Mi knoa sey smaddy have sumting dem a wonda about and dem juss afraid fi ask. Come out wid it! Mek we chat sumting else fi deh ress of deh day

Alrite mi have a question? WHAT KEEP YAH COMING BACK TO JV? Mainly this tread? Sometime I wonder why I check dis here site so often. Do you actually value the opinions of those on the bord. Do you think people who post here are really genuine,How much of whats posted here matters? It's obviously not just for immigration info.

Just wondering what your thoughts are.

I think its nice just to chat or listen to people who are going through the same or something similar to yourself. I think people in general like to know that they have something in common with other people. It makes you feel better about yourself.

Not too mention there is some good advise and good laughs on here.

:-)

Ditto

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 12:20:00

My gosh, y'all yp to page 47 already and last night I was only caught up to page 23. Anyway am gonna

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 10:38:00

Hey guys, good morning. Seems like I have to back pedal to catch up on all the juicy gossip and good news and good advice that you all have dished out. I am logged on at work and will try to keep up as much as I can. I have an orientee with me today and I gave her both patients and she is a little behind and I am gonna lite some fire under her

Talk to you all later. I have a topic that I need you all help on but will post it later.

Love you all tons

Claire

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-07 10:35:00

QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Mar 6 2008, 03:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 6 2008, 01:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (sjb1221 @ Mar 6 2008, 01:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 6 2008, 12:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

?????

has anyone lost friendships because of your relationships.

for either reason because they thought your s/o wasn't going to make u happy, he was using you or because you were happy??

I didn't lose any friends but some of my friendships changed. These people supported me while during my long distance relationship with Damien. But when he came the calls stopped or they never ask about him. I think that's strange.

Others didn't expect Damien to do so well or we would last. They never said it but I can tell...

I experienced this and i'm sort of at a loss as to why, and when i go to call, it's oh i was going to call u.

yup same here....my friends were so excited for him to come here...then when he was here....the calls stopped....

Maybe your friends are giving you time to get used to each other or maybe they are giving you space and time to be with your husband. If I am hanging out at my girlfriend's house and her husband comes home from work, i leave because that is their family time and I do not want to interrupt that.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 22:20:00

QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Mar 6 2008, 02:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Mar 6 2008, 06:20 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 05:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

YES!!!!! MI waan fi hear deh answer tuh dis...cause all hell is about to set loose inna fi mi family when dem here wat mi a guh duh!

IT'S GOT 'STELLA' ALL OVER IT....

...But only Ken and I know it's NOT!!

Bless,Gill

All now mi a wait fi answer on what to do, mi nuh get it yet!!!

anyway, you haven't told your family about Ken yet?? are they invited to the wedding??

Jengy,

I told my 'supportive' family members and my father. Aunts, Uncles...everyone one else jus a guh haffi find thorugh my family's gossip network! They will all talk ish amongst each other...but not to my face! I tried to tell the 'head' of deh gossip tree last night( so she could kick hoff deh new 'NEWS')...but as soon as she hear seh mi a guh Kingston...she start wan bag ah fussin'! Mi neva even git round fi tell har WHY mi a guh Kingston!

It's exhausting...I told 2 more family members this week...both of them immediately said the sane thing..."Yuh sure hit not Green cyard em a look!" On one hand I know I have matured alot ...cause deh old Gill wouldda cuss dem han keep moving. I see it as them looking out for me...which is sweet! But I'm a grown-a$$ ooman...Good or bad is my decision fi mek!

Yup their all coming to the wedding! It'll be VERY INTERESTING!!

Bless,
Gill

Gill, when I told some family and friends about Mike they made the same comment about him looking a greencard, only to find out that his was already being processed.

I always tell them if it is a mistake I am making, let it be my mistake that I learn from

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 22:06:00

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 6 2008, 09:05 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Mar 6 2008, 06:20 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 05:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

OKAY,

NEXT QUESTION

how do u handle people who don't respect your relationship - or think your s/o is with you only to get their papers.

mr jengles met this older guy from j.a. at school, the guy lives with his daughter, the guy is in his 50's mr jengles says. ok so they talk every once in a while. the school had something for xmas and mr jengles made two dishes. They guy calls and invites mr jengles over to his house for xmas dinner. so mr jengles asks me if we can go, so i said sure in the evening. the guy then calls mr jengles and says to him, too bad mr jengles couldn't come over and cook xmas dinner for him and his daughter. I'm like huh???? mr jengles just took it as a complement to his cooking. I didn't cause u know the man has his family so what the hell are u talking about. anyway xmas day I was sick so we didn't go anywhere.

then the man calls and mr jengles says to him he is going to j.a. and the man could call me and get mr jengles cellphone number in j.a. o.k cool. the man calls a week later when he thinks mr jengles is in j.a. (remember now he lost his passport) so he was supposed to be in j.a. when the man called. the man says oh my duaghter went down yesterday. she's wasn't even staying anywhere around ochi, but still that is what u're calling him to tell him. not how u are doing or how is j.a. Is it just me reading too much into something. I asked one of my friends and she said I wasn't, just want to make sure. I haven't said anything to mr. jengles. the man has been calling since mr jengles has been gone but never when i'm home. so how do deal with something like that??

YES!!!!! MI waan fi hear deh answer tuh dis...cause all hell is about to set loose inna fi mi family when dem here wat mi a guh duh!

IT'S GOT 'STELLA' ALL OVER IT....

...But only Ken and I know it's NOT!!

Bless,Gill

All now mi a wait fi answer on what to do, mi nuh get it yet!!!

anyway, you haven't told your family about Ken yet?? are they invited to the wedding??

QUOTE (clairern @ Mar 6 2008, 12:03 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 11:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 11:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ok..so oonuh memba mi paper wah mi couldn't do ? mi prof email mi today a talk bout him send a "C" if mi ok wid dat..hmmm bwoy mi no know..mi really no feel like do no paper but den again mi no want no baxide C..wah oonuh tink ?

sounds like u doing a paper...if u were at a point where a "c" wouldn't move your g.p.a then cool, but u just started the program right...so it would be better if u did better in the beginning.

a dat mi a seh..but him a go ask mi if mi alright with that...hell no ..gimme mi incomplete mek mi finish and u grade mi

sounds good to me, but then maybe u can vomit pon him shoes and ask for the b.

clairen...i think we is all addicted myself and how u ask Lita for change and we nuh see how much money u give her. lol

i'm really really going to bed now. i told mr jengles i was going to bed two hours ago and all now mi still sitting by the computer

Yuj nuh se me give har $0.20 fe mi opinion and she owe me change cause hit ongle wut $0.02.

Yuh write, Lita gi the woman back her eighteen cents and hurry up, cause if she like me, she would charge u interest.

deh langa she tek fe pay, de interest a compound

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 16:58:00

QUOTE (sus @ Mar 6 2008, 07:38 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 09:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

good idea,

i'm about to file a grievance against my child, i just don't understand how he can bounce into tables that are two feet away from him and knock everyting over. its like he has a wind that follows him *cha*

If there is an area that I know something about and I can help someone step in the right direction, then I will do it - I won't apologize for the fact that I work in the legal field - I fought long and hard to get where I am in my career - I also won't apologize for the fact that I fell in love with a man from another country or that I post here, even though we haven't made a decision as a couple how we are going to proceed as of yet. I am not quite sure what your problem is or why you continually take an attitude with my posts - But if you don't like them, don't read them -

Morning everyone

HUH

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 16:56:00

QUOTE (Trelawny20853 @ Mar 6 2008, 08:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

GOOD MORNING MY BEAUTIFUL SISTAHS....how are ya'll. Bway mi ago mad...weh mi NOTICE deh!...ow dem decide who fi process fuss...bway..cho man

Hang on me dear. Mi dida feel the same way couple weeks ago and when mi least expect it, de case complete. Yuh knoa we deh ya fe yuh put yuh head pon we shoulda. We luv yuh and yuh can bawl pon we shoulda anytime

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 16:55:00

Nite y'all. See yuh a mawning.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 00:09:00

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 11:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 11:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

sounds like u doing a paper...if u were at a point where a "c" wouldn't move your g.p.a then cool, but u just started the program right...so it would be better if u did better in the beginning.

a dat mi a seh..but him a go ask mi if mi alright with that...hell no ..gimme mi incomplete mek mi finish and u grade mi

Yuj nuh se me give har $0.20 fe mi opinion and she owe me change cause hit ongle wut $0.02.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-06 00:03:00

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Jengles @ Mar 5 2008, 11:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Lita u know me and husband used to fight when were separated not that we don't now..but what i did by the advice of a friends mother..she seh wah is the sense oonuh a go talk everyday and cuss waste of money...So u know what i did stopped calling everyday all thru the day..and u know it helped..maybe u need to back off a little..maybe just send the emails and texts and so but limit the phone talk it brings frustration of missing each other so near but yet so far kinda thing...hope it works out

so i had a salad with turkey today plus some baby carrot with ranch dressing and all i've been wanting is water...everytime i see water i wanna be in it..

U get dry mouth??

i do mroe time....a coulda dat huh !! JENGS MI NAH TEK NUTTIN..IT JUST STOP BY ITSELF MY GIRL...!!! afta mi call mi doc in tears seh mi vomit blood and den go in and feel bettah like a lie mi did a tell

QUOTE (clairern @ Mar 5 2008, 11:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

LAWD ME ADDICTED TO VJ. ME LOG ON FRAM ME COME HOME FROM WORK AND NOW A 1130 AND ME STILL DEH YAH. a WRANG WID ME EEHHH????

Clairey it's ok hunny..i think we are all addicted

Oh, thank you, thank you. I thought I was crazy

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What is the alternative? An incomplete? How would that affect your GPA?

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 23:49:00

QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Mar 5 2008, 11:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I agree with Kimmie on this one. I had the same problem with Mike only the other way around. I was the one complaining. We would talk everyday, sometimes twice a day and after the second visit in October, I started to miss him so much more and would tell him how I felt but he would not reciprocate. He would be silent and I always asked if I am talking to the phone and wasting money. He always says "telling you I miss you and all that is not gonna change the fact that we can't be together right now. I know how you feel and you know how I feel. Talking about it is not the solution right now, because when we get off the phone, it's not gonna change." The more I heard that the angrier I became and then I decided to back off and not call him as much and would purposefully miss his calls. Now ehen we talk it is so fullfilling and we have so much more to talk about. We now talk maybe 2-3 times a week and I am better able to handle the separation.

Lita, I also think you should try backing off a little. Some men are die-hard romantics and like to hear sweet nuiances in their ears. I think also Evan is missing his baby and needs to hears those things to re-affirm your love for him.

Just my $0.20.

Now ge me back me change

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 23:46:00

LAWD ME ADDICTED TO VJ. ME LOG ON FRAM ME COME HOME FROM WORK AND NOW A 1130 AND ME STILL DEH YAH. a WRANG WID ME EEHHH????

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 23:36:00

QUOTE (clairern @ Mar 5 2008, 10:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (BelwinMills @ Mar 5 2008, 10:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Congratulations Claire!!! On your case being completed. Time will fly by now in a few months you should have an interview. All the best with the next stage of your journey.

Thanks Jax

Thank you all ladies for your kind words and congratulations.

Hopefully he will get an interview date for next month

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 22:59:00

QUOTE (BelwinMills @ Mar 5 2008, 10:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Congratulations Claire!!! On your case being completed. Time will fly by now in a few months you should have an interview. All the best with the next stage of your journey.

Thanks Jax

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 22:46:00

QUOTE (JaEnglishGirl @ Mar 5 2008, 06:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

THEY CASHED MY CHECKS!!!!!

FINALLY dammit!!

YEAH!!! :dance:

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 15:24:00

I am about to go get ready for work. I am on call today and they already called me since 0500am to come in. I do not want to be late. I will try to catch up with you all today at some point. Hope you all have a great, wonderful and productive day. Love you all my VJ sistas.!!!

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 05:40:00

QUOTE (Marlita @ Mar 5 2008, 12:16 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Congrats Claire....I just saw your case completed!! I hope you get a April interview.

Yall pray for me and my lost in visa space CR1 application. As you can see from my timeline I sent it a LOOOOONNNNGG time ago...me and Shrewdie. SO keep us in your prayers for a soon come approval.

Thanks Marlita. Sending positive vibes your way and hope that CR1 application become earth bound soon and you get your approval soon.

QUOTE (brownnskinn @ Mar 5 2008, 05:32 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (clairern @ Mar 4 2008, 11:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Lawd, oonu hole me dung, hole me dung, woieeeeeeeMik

e case comple 3/3/08. Now me hope me get de intaview soon.

Congrats...u a hot mess too.

Thanks Browning;

Hot, hot, hot????.

Me tiyad a dem deh feeling dat wake me up inna the middle of de nite

Edited by clairern, 05 March 2008 - 05:38 AM.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-05 05:37:00

Lawd, oonu hole me dung, hole me dung, woieeeeeeeMik

e case comple 3/3/08. Now me hope me get de intaview soon.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-04 22:07:00

Bwoy, oonu caan chat eehh?

We very popular.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-03-04 21:08:00

Reasons a K1 Application would be denied?

QUOTE (JOURNEE1125 @ Aug 6 2008, 11:19 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Although I have not started my paperwork as of yet. I am in the process of creating my own check list with descriptions of all the do' and donts. Can some one please send me some info on what will cause a K 1 to be denied.

Thnx Journee

Journee, as you might have read in the yardie thread one of the reasone we have seen for denial is admitting to smoking ganja ever. Even if your drug test comes back positive, they will still deny and impose a ban. I don't know about your SO but this has to be addressed ASAP. The other reason is if the CO has doubts about the genuinity of the relationship, so start gathering your proofs.

First on the checklist--DO NOT ADMIT TO EVER SMOKING WEED.

Edited by clairern, 06 August 2008 - 11:08 AM.

clairern

Female

Jamaica

2008-08-06 11:08:00