Forum	Title	Content	Member	Sex	Country	Date/Time
Philippines	Does your wife think the US is too cold ?	Just wondering after your bride gets to the USA if she has problems adjusting thinking the USA is too cold all the time even in normal temps. My wife to be said it was "cold" a few times in phil and I was thinking I wonder what she's talking about because I can see in the weather report the low is like 70-75 degrees at the time. When I was with her on Christmas in Mindanao I was sweating all the time as usual.. lol. One time at night maybe it was 70 or 72 and she said it was cold. I was wondering what she was talking about but sometimes we had the air con on in the room and I was a little cold but she was ok. My Dad's friend married a girl from Thailand and the weather was a big adjustment thing to her even though she moved to Arizona. I saw one guy here lived in Alaska and had pics of his wife in the snow and they looked happy as could be. I'm just wondering from your experience if the weather was a big adjustment issue for your wife or if it wasn't much of a big deal... If you filled out your timeline, it would help those who you want feedback from. For example, does my wife who has now been here in the states for nearly 3 years think it is too cold? No. Did she think that when she first arrived? Yes...and we live in sunny and mild weather here in So. California. Another point - she has relatives who live in New Jersey and have lived there now for over 20 years. As remarkable as it may seem, Filipinos can and do adapt to colder climates. Just give her some time to be acclimated. Also, when she first arrives, all the changes are a bit stressful and become magnified. It's best to make her feel as much home as possible by finding other Filipino families in your area.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-01-04 12:39:00
Philippines	Is it wise to teach a 41 year old Filipina to drive?	Oh brother....	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-07 14:01:00
Philippines	Is it wise to teach a 41 year old Filipina to drive?	I hate women with hairy legs, Or legs that have been shaved and feel like sand paper. I think its a good gerneralization that Filippinas dont have hairy legs Boy did I marry the wrong Filipina....if she doesn't shave her legs, it's like sleeping next to a porcupine.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-07 11:28:00
Philippines	Is it wise to teach a 41 year old Filipina to drive?	I can't believe you're marrying another Filipina. Are you a glutton for punishment?	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-07 02:01:00
Philippines	Filipinos Join March for Justice in the Workplace	By Henni Espinosa, ABS-CBN North America Bureau SAN FRANCISCO – Filipinos joined about a hundred protesters last night, braving the rain and marching through the streets of San Francisco with one message — stop abusing workers! Reverend Israel Alvaran of the group, Clergy and Laity United for Economic Justice, was one of the religious leaders who organized the candlelight procession. He said, "We want to offer the light that faith brings — to strengthen workers and also ask management to have a change of heart." At the center of their advocacy — the plight of 9,000 hotel workers in the country who continue to work without a contract. More than 16 months have passed since the workers and their union have been trying to negotiate better wages and benefits. Josephine Rivera, union organizer for Unite Here said, "The workers and the union go into the negotiating table with hope, because management gives us hope that things would get better. But they never follow through. So it's very frustrating for people who do not get the help they need." Francisca Ramos has been working in the hotel industry for 21 years. She said she's never seen workers so devalued. She said jobs have been lost, hours have been cut — and yet workload has increased. She said, "People at work are stressed, not knowing if they will have a job tomorrow. There are bills to pay and families to feed. But we know that the only way to put a stop to this is if we fight together and make sure we get the contract we deserve." Following the candlelight procession, the workers barged into the Grand Hyatt Hotel, armed with a different kind of Christmas card. The Grand Hyatt Hotel is one of th emajor hotels in the U.S. negotiating with the workers. Alvaran said, "The card says that in this time of darkness, there is hope and light for workers…management needs to have a change of heart and treat workers well now that the holiday season is here." Hotel spokesperson Sam Singer said they do care for their employees — but the bad economy makes it harder to give them what they want. Singer said, "The Grand Hyatt Hotel in San Francisco is working hard to make sure the rooms are filled so the workers can have good benefits and good salaries. We're doing our best in a difficult economy." Protesters said that even with the tough economy, these hotels earn millions and should start investing in their workers. In the middle of their boycotts and strikes, these workers and their advocates say they can only pray that their employers would somehow be enlightened and realize that it's never too late to make things right. http://www.balitanga...-the-workplace/	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-15 08:29:00
Philippines	Have we gotten lazy?	Understood But, it seems that there are quite a bit of beneficiaries who are trying to fill out forms that are required at the USCIS stage of the process. I can wholly understand about being panicked at the interview stage, or even the pre-interview stage, just to make sure everything is filled out correctly. But, if the petitioner was as involved as they should be, the paperwork should be squared away ahead of time. It just seems that a lot of beneficiaries are left hanging once the package leaves US soil, and heads for where ever it's going. Asking questions is ALWAYS welcomed, and recommended. Especially on this site. As I stated the advice given from the seasoned VJ veterans is priceless compared to even an immigration lawyers advice. Yeah, I don't really follow the threads close enough to know what's being asked by whom, but even if I did, I don't think I could jump to any real conclusions about their commitment to the process with a clear conscience. If I were to generalize though, I'd say a lot of these beneficiaries (pinays) are well educated and probably have better reading and cognitive skills than their USC counterparts, but that's just me.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-09 12:57:00
Philippines	Have we gotten lazy?	I feel total pity for the folks that come to us for advice because they are panicking, rather than having their lazy a$ed USC SO do the research for them. That's a bit presumptuous. Unless a beneficiary has specifically said that they are doing all the paperwork on their own, there's no way to tell how involved the petitioner is with preparing the paperwork. The fact that many beneficiaries are getting involved and asking questions here is a good thing, IMO. That means they are less likely to be in-the-dark about the process.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-09 09:34:00
Philippines	Married Filipinos who send money to family back in Philippines	I learned my lesson, stay away from Filipinos. They are bred to do one thing, get as much money as possible without working for it. Well your ex-gf deserves better. No use in her spending any more time with a racist.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-13 02:21:00
Philippines	Married Filipinos who send money to family back in Philippines	QUOTE (DianneWalgreens @ Dec 22 2009, 02:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> i wonder if this guy is really married to a pinay dude u cant even spell the right word its Filipina, Filipinos, WRITE, PAWNED, PAWN and again its WRITE not right! LMAO He's not the sharpest tool in the shed.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2009-12-22 17:11:00
Philippines	Who are the Filipinas here that received money before getting married to their foreign fiance and sending money when they got here in US?	If someone could wave a wand and make the Philippines have a robust economy like other Asian countries such as South Korea and Japan, then we wouldn't have the kinds of discussions we have regarding money and it's influence on Fil/Am courtships. One of the things that has taken my wife some time to get used to is understanding what a Middle Class is. When she first arrived in the states, we were living in Orange County, California, and every time she saw a Mercedes Benz or a Cadillac SUV, she thought those people must be rich. For Filipinos, they have no real concept of a Middle Class. Everyone is either dirt poor or well off. It's a country that miraculously stays together fairly peacefully despite the large income disparities. I'm surprised they haven't had more revolutionaries. Edited by 8TBVBN, 13 December 2010 - 02:18 AM.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-13 02:18:00
Philippines	I get to eat at Jolibee now.	As for burger places, I'd definitely choose Jolibee over McDonald's. I'd take Whataburger over either one, but Jolibee was just fine for me. My only complaint with Jolibee is that they always seemed crowded. I guess that's a good problem for a business to have. Taco Cabana is fine, but here in San Antonio there are Mexican food restaurants everywhere you turn. I'm not complaining but I am getting fatter. Go Spurs Go. It's time for another river parade. B. I could live the rest of my life eating Mexican food every day and not grow tired of it, which drives my wife nuts. She has slowly grown to mildly like Mexican food, but starts to break out in hives if she doesn't have some variation of asian food regularly. My 9 yr. old son, who lived in the Philippines until he was 5, loves the burger steak at Jollibee, and I have to admit it is pretty tasty. But again, if I had a choice between an authentic Filipino restaurant or Jollibee, it would be no contest.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-16 16:31:00
Philippines	I get to eat at Jolibee now.		one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-16 16:12:00
Philippines	I get to eat at Jolibee now.	I don't know - Jollibee is no different than McDee's or another fast food chain, other than it originated in the Philippines (by a Chinese businessman). I realize it's become iconic with Filipino culture, but the food tastes like your typical fast food variety. I'd much rather have an authentic Filipino restaurant open up in town than a Jollibee.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-15 17:47:00
Philippines	Philippines fire kills 15, many nursing students	By JIM GOMEZ, Associated Press Jim Gomez, Associated Press MANILA, Philippines – A fire rapidly swept through a budget hotel in the northern Philippines early Sunday burning to death 15 people — several crammed in bathrooms where they fled in panic. Nine of the victims were nursing students in town to take a licensing exam. Some firefighters were moved to tears after finding the badly burned bodies in the upper floors of the five-story hotel and offered prayers before retrieving the remains, fire investigator Daniel Abana said. The fire raged for eight hours and gutted the Bed and Breakfast Pension House in Cagayan province's capital of Tuguegarao city. The students who survived the fire went on to take the exam on Sunday, including one who showed up in slippers and sleeping clothes. Relatives grieved at a morgue where remains of victims, 14 burned beyond recognition, were brought. Some fainted as body bags were brought into a funeral parlor. "Their families spent fortunes to send these children to school only to see them end that way," Abana told The Associated Press by telephone. The fire started on the ground floor, apparently fueled by car tires and other combustible materials stored in an automobile parts store. Paint cans also may have been in the building, which was recently renovated, Abana said. Dozens of guests, roused by the commotion, were rescued by firefighters and police out of the still-smoldering building through the main gate and fire escapes. Some managed to escape on their own but others may have panicked and got trapped by the flames, Cagayan police chief Mao Aplasca said. The dead included nine nursing students. The rest were members of the family that owned the hotel, including three children, Aplasca said. Many of the dead had crammed in bathrooms on the top two floors. One victim had a foot stuck out of a window in a desperate attempt to survive, Abana said. At least 12 nursing students were taken to hospitals with minor burns. The building was still smoldering when firefighters broke in and scrambled to search for the 15 victims, police said. "It's so close to Christmas, we wept when we saw their bodies," Abana told The AP. A nursing college instructor, Romeo Opido, told police that about 36 nursing students from nearby provinces were at the hotel in Tuguegarao, about 215 miles (350 kilometers) north of Manila. At least 27 escaped and 9 were missing, he said before the bodies were discovered. Aileen Gonzales, an aunt of one of the students believed to have perished in the fire, said what happened was a twin disaster because her nephew died just days before Christmas and her family had hoped she would pass the nursing exam and work abroad. Many Filipino students from middle-income and impoverished families have taken nursing courses in recent years in the hope of landing relatively high-paying jobs abroad. Their massive departure has alarmed officials in the poor Southeast Asian country, which sorely lacks medical workers and hospitals. Cagayan fire official Neil Caranguian said investigators have not determined the cause of the blaze. Faulty electrical equipment, overcrowding and weak enforcement of safety regulations have been blamed for many deadly fires in the Philippines. http://news.yahoo.co...ines_hotel_fire	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-19 05:27:00
Philippines	Filipinos and saving money for retirement	It's funny how someone just happens to stumble on to this site and with a day or so is posting like a pro. I smell a troll.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-13 23:11:00
Philippines	Filipinos and saving money for retirement	I think it can't be ignored the differences in domestic policies like Social Security and Medicare that we have in the U.S. vs. what is available for retirees in Philippines. That said, there are a lot of Americans who retire with little or no savings. If you give a homeless man a twenty dollar bill, do you think he's going to invest 20% of it? When people are accustomed to a meager existence, there is no tomorrow - only today. Saving for a tomorrow is a luxury for people who know with reasonable certainty there will in fact, be a tomorrow.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-12-13 02:09:00
Philippines	Pinoy Couple Fights Deportation Order	By Don Tagala, ABS-CBN North America A Filipino couple from New Jersey are fighting a deportation order they received right before the new year. The U.S. Citizenship and immigration Services ordered the voluntary deportation of Rica and Gideon Tonog. Rica had earlier applied for permanent residency based on a work visa. Immigration authorities rejected her application, saying that Rica’s employer, a Filipino-owned staffing company is not financially capable to sponsor foreign workers. Rica’s husband Gideon suffered a similar immigration problem after the company that had sponsored his work visa was shut down. The Filipino American Legal and Education Fund (FALDEF) is helping the Tonogs fight deportation. Lawyers for FALDEF hope to have the deportation deferred through a public petiiton. Rica has cancer of the uterus and hopes to continue cancer treatment in the U.S. http://www.balitanga...ortation-order/	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-01-04 00:44:00
Philippines	Which city and state are you?	Hi Ryan, Can you put us down on your next update? Steven and Jinky - Lake Forest, CA ....also Sherif Uling (Ahmari and Jhen) should be on that list. There are many many here in California...maybe you've just got really adverstise your list so they know about it.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2008-07-28 21:16:00
Philippines	Share some Filipino Recipes!	He doesn't like sinigang??? That's just blasphemy! Just kidding. I'm the USC husband, and I'm also half Filipino. So I suppose my answers will be biased. But here are a few that I find delicious: 1) Adobo (pork or chicken...or both) - Most everyone seems to love adobo. 2) Sinigang - I still can't believe he doesn't like this! 3) Kare-kare - You can use boneless beef, if he doesn't want to try oxtail. 4) Pinakbet - Definitely one of my favorite recipes! If he is a fan of veggies, this should be the winner. 5) Lumpia - Another excellent dish. More of an appetizer though, IMO. 6) Giniling - A basic dish of ground pork, diced potatoes, carrots, and some crushed garlic. 7) Inihaw na liempo - One of my favorites! Hard to beat Andok's, though. 8) Kaldareta - Traditionally made with goat. But I would stick with beef or even lamb. Goat has a very gamey smell that may turn him off to trying. 9) Bicol express - a sweet and spicy dish. Shrimp is very good, but ground/diced pork is great, too! These are more exotic recipes that, hopefully, he would try: 1) Dinuguan aka chocolate meat - Excellent, excellent dish. Easily a top five dish, in my book! Hopefully, you have access to fresh ingredients. 2) Sisig - Born in Pampanga, Philippines. One of the best polutan dishes ever! Best served with some alcohol. Well, this is my $0.02. I sure hope he finds at least one he likes. My wife and I also cannot survive on fast foods here. She and I both grew up eating rice daily. Good luck with cooking here in the States. The ingredients may be, at times, challenging to find. But it is very do-able. All the best! I love giniling with lots of ketchup (banana or tomato). My wife now dreads making it because she insists on chopping the carrots and potatoes by hand, which takes a lot of time. There aren't too many Filipino dishes that I've tried that I didn't like - the food is just so dang tasty (perhaps all the MSG). Sinigang - love the eggplant and other vegetables. Pancit - so many variations, but my favorite is the thinner noodles with the strips of fungus Biko (sp) - the sticky rice dessert Hoomba (sp) - chunks of flavored pork Sotanghon (sp) - the glass noodles in a soup base ...perfect on a cold day. and probably my favorite, Kangkong (sp) - I love the contrast between the crunchy stalks of the water spinach with the mushiness of its sauteed leaves.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-01-22 08:10:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	Geez, Steven. I thought you got sucked into the dark side. My Kano said he married a Pinay because the Kana girls wouldn't bite. I go, what's up with these Kana girls? My Kano is well educated (MBA), has a very good job, not "kalbo" (bald), not "tabatchoy" (fat), may be hitting his big 5-0 but he definitely looks young for his age. The Kana girls' loss, my gain! I hit the jackpot with him but he won the Mega Lotto with me LOL! I've always had a little twist of the dark side. You are lucky and so is he, sister. You might want to recreate your story, in detailed installments on this discussion board, a la Ken y Leidys! It's so much more fun to write fiction though.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 22:57:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	Still waiting to hear your story. Oh, my real story? hehehe.... We were introduced by mutual friends, but via online. I had visited the Philippines the year before to meet another girl that I met through a dating site. Prior to joining that site, I had dated locally, and was in a relationship for about a year and half before that. Anyhow, the person I met the first trip, it was a disaster except for me meeting two very good people (boyfriend and girlfriend) who I maintained contact after I returned home. Several months later, I happened to see that they (insik and tambok) were online (Yahoo Msgr), connected to their webcam and they had a friend with them. I didn't think much of it until months later, I remembered her distinct name (Jinky) and noticed her on my friend's Friendster (another social network site like Facebook) list. I sent her a 'hello' and we just started exchanging messages back and forth until we decided to meet online to chat. Both her parents and my parents were apprehensive about long distance relationships, and also wondered about the stereotypes. However, later on, her parents flew to Dublin, Ireland to visit two of their other daughters who are RN's and my parents happened to be visiting Ireland at the same time (they have duel citizenship). So they all met and that eased everyone up a bit. She never belonged to any dating site, however, I don't think there is anything wrong with couples meeting that way. There are risks involved for both sides, but I'm sure it is possible to find lasting love that way. As to why I initially tried an international dating site - I always found people from different cultures interesting, nothing more. There was nothing special that I was drawn to the Philippines or Filipinas. Physically, I've always been more attracted to brunettes, particularly Mexican girls. The woman I was in a relationship here locally was Puerto Rican. My ex-wife is Mexican. But, beyond any physical attraction, I don't see any real fundamental differences, in spite of cultural differences. People are people, no matter where they come from.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 18:26:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	OK, I'll go. Here's my story.... A few years back, on a whim, I checked to see how much money I would be making when I retired. I realized I wasn't happy with what I found, so I started thinking about solutions. One solution was retiring overseas. I started looking for a country that had certain qualities; low cost of living, English speaking, and doesn't hate Americans. The Philippines quickly moved high on the list. I've always been single; but it's by choice. I wasn't hurt by American women. I have nothing bad to say about anybody. I also hadn't heard anything really special about Filipinas. I was really just thinking about a place to retire. But then the idea hit me about maybe meeting somebody from the Philippines who could live with me here and then, when I retire, we could both move back. So, I started looking at dating sites. Yikes!! For a long time, the results were less than encouraging. Whenever I would talk to a woman, the conversation would eventually lead one of three ways. 1. Can you send me some money. 2. If I take my clothes off, would you send me some money. 3. Can you visit me here; and bring some money. None of these were what I was looking for. So, I quickly decided the dating sites were a waste of time. I logged on one last time so that I could delete my account. And I saw the picture of a beautiful smiling face that had just looked at my profile. I said a quick hello to her and she began apologizing for looking at my profile since she was younger than the ages I had put I was interested in. So, she was apologizing and I was trying to make her feel better. And then we just kept talking. A year later I'm visiting her on the other side of the world. Eventually I happily deleted my account. She's perfect for me not because she is a Filipina; but just because of the person she is. She talks to my family on line. I love her family. Her mother and her older brother are simply some of the best people I've ever known. I don't know much about what all Filipinas are like; but I am very happy with Jessa. Thanks for sharing, B. I always thought you were BJ, but now I see the 'J' is for Jessa.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 16:41:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	I'm sorry. My wording was not clear enough. (morning coffee hadn't kicked in yet) I mean...How about you explain the motivation behind your joke. It's pretty obvious, there are some that you might enlighten. See post #30.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 11:56:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	Steven, I'll have to agree with happyndinlove. If any Filipinas took offense to my posts here, I apologize. The jest was aimed at the stereotypes themselves and those who perpetuate them. It would be refreshing to hear more candid attitudes about the motivations, intentions and viewpoints of some here as to why they married a Filipina, even if some might find such ideas offensive or even repulsive.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 10:49:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	C'mon Buscador. You are taking the joke too far and it's getting offensive. How 'bout you reign it in now.? (This isn't OT) I think you should explain your motivation so the obtuse can catch up. (and since your at it already) How 'bout you can clean all the ladies' shoes that you muddied. (it's seems you enjoy sociology but this isn't a very nice way to provoke and observe) Michael Hermano Miguel, We're a mixed bag here of various motivations, intentions and viewpoints about marrying Filipinas. Why fight it? If some here want a little sex kitten as their own in-home gym, who are we to judge?	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 10:29:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	ha! ha! ha ! that was funny but true. One thing i can add is because we filipinas prioritize our marriage and family first and foremost more than anything. We always make sure we takes care of our family . You Filipinas sure do. You are all these little sex kittens just waiting to pounce...hahaha. It's like having your own in-home gym. I don't know where you get all that energy.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-11 01:24:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	She makes me laugh all the time. My family chat with her online and they love her. Even though we are still 8000 miles apart, she makes me always relaxed. I love my Filipina wife! Mine too. Does she show you sexy, sexy when it's just the two of you chatting online? Was she your first pick or did you have to go through several profiles to find her?	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-10 18:57:00
Philippines	Men Your Thoughts On Filipina	...what is it about your filipina that made you decide she is the one? I married her for her broken English. It's just adorable. And how she irons my shirts, and how she always has a hot cooked meal for me, even when I come home drunk at 2am. And that she's like a little sports car, revving and ready for me to take her for a ride, even if she's been slaving over the hot stove all day. All the hype about these Filipinas is TRUE! She even thinks my rolls of fat and baldness make me look guapo. It was money well spent!	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-10 18:17:00
Philippines	Sending money to your wife's family for hospital expenses		one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-11-11 05:13:00
Philippines	My New Job in Philippines - Airport Police	Thanks for sharing these photos, TLC. I feel like we are good friends. If we're ever in your neck of the woods in Texas, I hope you'd take us in as your guests.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-03-15 01:39:00
Philippines	Is it really such a bad thing for a filipina to be with a foreign man?	I ask because cathy and i have been having alot of cultural talks of late thanks to some of the posts i have read here and it brought up something i didnt know happened when i was there that she finaly told me. Mind you she is rather passive and lets alot slide, i on the other hand am not and let very little slide. When i visited cathy for the first time she really didnt stay in my hotel and her parents always made her sister accompany us until they were comfortable with me (which i thought was kinda cool and old school ) The last night i was there we got in late and i was leaving on the early flight so we went back to teh hotel picked up my things and left. Since it was so late her sister stayed home. When i was in the cab i didnt have any cash to pay the driver as i gave it all out in tips when leaving. We stopped at a BDO to use the atm at like 4 am. i couldnt find my card and was taking a bit longer at the ATM than i realized. Cathy did something odd that i didnt pay much attention to, she got out the car and came to the ATM to ask me if i was alright. I didnt pay much attention at the time cause she was waaay overprotective of me while i was there and we were in a rush to pick up her parents as they were comming to the airport with us to see me off. Now she tells me that the cabbie said something waaaay screwed up to her and offended her and thats why she got out cause she didnt want to be alone with him in the car. Mind you i was just saying to her Wow that guy was nice, he told me that i better hold onto you becasue you are a keeper, he said you were a good one and must be raised very well because of the way you carry yourself and that i am lucky. When i said that she got upset then told me everything. She didnt tell me then becuase she said i would make a scene. hehe me, make a scene. hehe. Now if this was the only time it wolda been nothing, but i had to put a few guys in their place while i was there and she would always tell me "just wear your smile", which kills me when she says that, even when its obvious shes uncomfortable. i mean why smile at someone being rude to you. She started to explain to me about how some view filipinas who date older foreign men. But i dont fit the mold of the average foreigner coming to the phills. So im just curious, is it me or have others encountered crazy things when there or am i just making a big to do over nothing? Try to put yourself in their shoes. Imagine if 'wealthy', older Arab men from the Middle East were flocking to the town you live in, courting young American girls and taking them to their country, what do you think your honest reaction would be? And imagine that for most of these young women, their only chance of making a better life for themselves is to leave your town and go live in the Middle East? I would recommend you try and understand rather than get defensive. In the most cynical and perhaps pragmatic view of Fil/Am courtships is that it is a commodity. Countless young Filipinas sign up with international dating sites in the hopes of courting a Kano or other 'wealthy' foreigner to escape the cycle of poverty that most of them are stuck in. While there are plenty of Filipinas that don't fit exactly into that generalization, a good majority of them do. Does that make these relationships a sham or less valid than other marriages? No. But understanding that reality of Fil/Am courtships will help you to better deal with the problems that go along with it, including the disapproving glares from bystanders. When I first visited my wife in the Philippines, I was fortunate enough that her parents allowed me to stay in their home, although they were a bit apprehensive toward me. I just tried my best to let them get to know me. And as far as my parents were concerned, they were even more apprehensive about me getting involved with a woman who lives thousands of miles away. Edited by El Buscador, 29 October 2010 - 10:45 AM.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2010-10-29 10:42:00
Philippines	Culture, misunderstanding, or just plain used?	The question put to her by him (paraphasing) - "We can be together now, or you and the kids can stay there in the Philippines for a long time before coming over?" would have been so insulting and preposterous (if I were her), that I'd probably give him the same answer. He may have legitimate financial concerns about waiting, but he should have figured that out long before he started courting her. He sounds like he's putting her on layaway. Hopefully, this will be a lesson learned.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-07 15:38:00
Philippines	anyone else told at there interview that we think you not get married	test scan.jpg   502.21KB   24 downloads When you appeal, redo all your evidence and spend time on the phone with your fiancee with the two of you talking about your long distant relationship. It's a good idea to recap how the relationship developed and how the two of you maintained that relationship over a long distance. She should get a photo album and use it as a presentation of all the paper evidence of the relationship. My wife put plane ticket stubs, receipts in the album, making it easy for the CO to peruse through. If your fiancee's command of English is not good, work with her by talking on the phone, so that when she gets another interview, she'll be able to effectively communicate to the CO about the relationship. She needs to realize that it is her personal testimony in the interview that the CO will be primarily making the decision on. The paper evidence is merely supplemental/corroborative.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-27 00:14:00
Philippines	anyone else told at there interview that we think you not get married	Of course everyone has their opinion as to what evidence is more crucial than others, the bottom line is that rarely do COs look at ANY of it. Just ask a few questions, maybe look at the pics sent with the I-129, and that's it. Not sure how you can say a phone log is more credible than anything else... particularly in light of the fact that I don't call my fiancee. Why? Well, when I COULD call her, it was much cheaper and easier to use Skype, particularly in light of the fact that there is video. So we spent hours and hours on Skype. And now that I am deployed, telephonic commo is almost impossible, and reserved only for emergencies. Still email & Skype, and Gmail video chat (whatever happens to work at the moment). Just not sure where you get your data for (basically) claiming that phone records are "the preferred" method of proof of commo. And I sincerely hope you are wrong, cuz we just ain't got it. The few times I did call, it was from a cell that is pre-paid, using a calling card that is pre-paid, and no billing records. But I am sure chat logs and bank statements will qualify just fine to show a relationship and continued support. It's not like I send money to strangers overseas just because I am a nice guy and want to save the world... At any rate, I guess we will find out in August if phone records are all that critical. Here's hoping our CO doesn't believe in phones! From common sense. Does it mean that couples who don't spend much time on the phone are not legit? Not necessarily but if I were a CO, I would question why they don't. So perhaps, for those couples who have an alternative way to communicate that is comparable to talking on the phone, should explain to the CO how the relationship works over long distance. From what I recall my wife telling me about her interview with the CO, he wanted to know from her how we met and how we stay in contact. If a Filipina goes into the interview thinking she can just simply dump onto the CO, evidence of relationship, and think that she doesn't have to tell your love story (in a nutshell) then I think you're setting yourself up for delays or possible denial. The so-called evidence is at the CO's disposal to help supplement/corroborate with the personal testimony of the beneficiary.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-26 11:11:00
Philippines	anyone else told at there interview that we think you not get married	The fact of the matter is there was pleanty of evidence. she had photos, letters, yahoo chat and the phone bills. He only looked atthe phone bill. never lookedat anything else. at the preinterview where they go through all the papers the girl there looked at everything including the photos and told shine to be sure they see the pictures. but the young man (CO) chose only the phone bill. That's your assumption. Look, it sucks to have this happen, but for whatever various reasons, red flags went off for the CO and he acted accordingly. You may not agree with his handling of your case, but it is his job to verify the validity of the relationship and unfortunately the Manila Embassy has seen it's share of fraudulent cases. Even here on this site, there have been many Kanos that have posted how they were taken for a fool by their Filipina.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-26 10:55:00
Philippines	anyone else told at there interview that we think you not get married	" they never looked at her pictures, never read the ym chat logs. only looked at the phone bill and said a 5 min phone call is not prove a relationship." I have zero minutes logged on a phone with my fiancee over the past year, that does not mean we don't have other evidence. Not all evidence holds equal weight in the eyes of the CO, particularly when they are keen to be looking out for potential fraud. I would imagine that phone conversations, where you are actually talking to your future spouse is the next best form of evidence besides spending time with them face to face. Chat logs and pictures, IMO, don't really prove much - they are more or less supplemental evidence, not primary. For example, I've got a photo of me chumming up with a famous person, but that doesn't mean we're friends. If I were a CO and all I saw were short phone calls, especially accompanied with bank statements showing that I've been sending some girl in the Philippines a steady cash flow, lots of red flags would go off for me. My advice would be to start spending more time talking on the phone with your future spouse and keep records.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-25 19:06:00
Philippines	anyone else told at there interview that we think you not get married	we had are interview on june 22. they deny her because they feel that she was not intending to get married. then the officer tells her she needs to convince them that she is. they never looked at her pictures, never read the ym chat logs. only looked at the phone bill and said a 5 min phone call is not prove a relationship. I really don't understand them. anyone else ever get this kind of result and were they able to convince them they intend to get married. She only brought one phone record and it was only a 5 minute long call? Sounds like she's going to need to bring more phone call logs showing you guys spending more than 5 minutes on the phone with each other. Sorry this caused a snag for you, but in all honesty, if I were the CO of an embassy that sees a high rate of fraud, I'd want to see more evidence than that.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-25 17:48:00
Philippines	crazy question... and still no answers	It's a gesture that they a posing for a photo. I think it's called, jarping. Ask your fiancee. I just watched a documentary on a bar girl in Thailand and she does the same gesture when smiling for the camera.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-30 18:47:00
Philippines	cultural differences vs. stereotyping	I have a friend that married a Filipina to have his arm candy. She married him for money and a green card. They are now getting divorced, what a surprise. Some trophy wives enjoy their new life. We know of a couple where the husband paid for her breast implants. He dresses like a guy would when he's at home on a Sunday watching football, and she dresses like she's a 21 year old clubber, but she seems to enjoy being his arm candy. Who knows though - maybe she's got a boyfriend on the side. Edited by 8TBVBN, 30 June 2011 - 09:55 AM.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-30 09:55:00
Philippines	cultural differences vs. stereotyping	I have a totally irrational fear of dentists. Try being married to one. I sleep with my hand over my mouth.	one...two...tree	Male	Philippines	2011-06-29 19:48:00