biggish data

I don't follow old Hugh around but he's 85 and has done pretty well with a string of 18-21 y.o.'s over the years. Who is Donald Trump with these days? It is an endless list but in general it is acceptable for the rich and powerful to do it in America. They can even get paid handsomly to be on magazine covers or centerfolds for it. Treated like royalty. Royal priviliges.

Oh, but to see a mere commoner do it - why we can't have that! These men are not worthy, and neither are the girls.

Please don't take offense, I am trying to point out a general hypocrisy I see that may not be yours. You may be offended by old Hugh or the Donald et al too, but tens of millions of others sure aren't.

It's always been a bit scandalous looking on the surface, no matter who the couple is. We were at our son's first soccer practice a couple of weeks ago, and the soccer coach, who is also a dad, put his foot in his mouth when he asked one of the other dads if he was the grandfather of one of the players. He looked at least 30 years older than his younger, Asian wife.

Edited by 8TBVBN, 30 June 2011 - 08:25 PM.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2011-06-30 18:06:00

Oh man ... you got that one right. Have you seen some of these guys?? Yikes! Myself excluded of course ...Haaa... yea right.

You and your wife are a nice looking couple, but lets be honest, Paul, do you think you would have been able to find a woman of her age and beauty here in the states? For example, there are millions of Filipino-Americans living here in the states and plenty of young, beautiful Filipinas, yet the frequency of these Filipina Americans marrying much older, American men is very low compared to the ones coming from the Philippines. So it's obvious that there are incentives for middle-aged to older American men to look to the Philippines for young, pretty Filipinas.

Edited by 8TBVBN, 30 June 2011 - 10:20 AM.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2011-06-30 10:17:00

I can fully agree with this, cause Ive seen it on here. I've also seen it in person at Paradise Island and our hotel in Manila. There were men in their 50's with young girls and I mean as young as 18. I was telling my fiance who is 10yrs younger then me but still within an acceptable age bracket for me being 40, that there is no way they could bring them girls back to the states and it be acceptable by there families. I'm sure most of those men had children older then the girls they were spending their time with. It actually made me a little uncomfortable seeing that. Just is not right in the American Eye. But you have to admit that the Philippines does have the most beautiful women.

It is what it is and it's hard to say which marriages are more legitimate than others, but obviously there is an incentive for older men who want a younger, prettier woman, to look to women from Third World countries who also have an incentive to seek out American men.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2011-06-28 19:23:00

I was hoping this topic didnt take a left turn....So again share how you and your fiance met

Most couples here met online via an international dating site, so talking about why someone chose a particular dating site and what the criteria was for women who became members is part of the story here. Are there any Filipino men who use the site to find American women? Are there any American women who find Filipino men? It's a niche market - middle aged or older men pairing up with young Filipinas, and with that, all kinds of problems.

As for how I met my wife, we were introduced by mutual friends. These friends I had met from a previous trip to the Philippines, where I did get to know another Filipina that I connected to through one of those dating sites. That connection ended up being a disaster. I had used local dating sites (Lava and another one I can't remember) prior to trying an international dating site and the interactions with the women are much different in comparison. For example, on a local dating site, the interactions are very casual, cautious and lighthearted. You also have snowball's chance in hell with dating-up to someone who is ten times more good looking than you. With an international dating site, women will practically throw themselves at the men, regardless of his physical appearance. The reality is, that for many Filipinas who use those dating sites, it's a potential ticket out of a meager existence, so the men have the upper hand and therefore can date-up to girls who would never give them the time of day if they were living in the U.S..

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2011-06-28 17:02:00

With so many Fil/Am couples here that have met through international dating sites, surely there's got to be some bad experiences - like being asked to send money, finding out that she's got a pinoy bf, or that she's juggling several online bf's.

Do any of these dating sites offer any guarantees or rigorously screen the girls? Do the girls pay to become a member? While I think that dating sites in general can be a good place to meet someone, there's also a lot of potential for scams. So I'd be curious as to what your criteria was for choosing a particular dating site for those who found their fiancee's that way?

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2011-06-28 02:35:00

Throughout the islands I saw internet cafes full of girls chatting with foreigners. I had been to Luzon, Mindanao, Samar, Leyte, and Cebu by then - the same thing everywhere. The survey I saw here indicates the internet is by far the most common way people are meeting. It was interesting that people always asked us over there if we met on the internet, but in a way that cast suspicion upon us somehow. I didn't understand why, so I asked my wife. She said it was all these Filipinas stripping on the internet. Ha ha how silly. Sure, that was my thinking too - I just preferred the hands-on approach.

For many, the internet has replaced the bar girl scene. It's cheaper and you're less likely to get an STD from computer keyboard.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2011-06-28 02:22:00

Porterhouse dear, I can tell you hang out / spend more time getting exposed to more Filipinos than other Asians and young American & European teens today. Yours truly have been around for quite an amount of time with Japanese, Koreans and Singaporeans once in my lifetime during grad school, but man! I think they're in love with themselves. Until I got back to Philippines at the time that digital cameras and camera phones became dirt cheap, and selfies then were not called selfies yet, and dining at a restaurant with good plating style was still a luxury and a status symbol.

But these days, no thanks to Instagram and facebook and twitter ... <and what have you>, with celebrities and socialites doing #ootd and the likes, there's just no stopping for anybody, photogenic or not.. It's not only Filipinos. Just saying.

Thanks. You're probably right that this is the trend for all younger generations growing up with social networks. I hope that as the novelty wears off, people will spend less time on looking good for the camera and live the moment like nobody is watching them.

Here's an example of taking it to extreme during Sinulog.

http://cebufinest.co...g-sinulog-2014/

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 15:46:00

I've noticed many Filipinos seem to enjoy being in pictures a lot more than most Americans. They also seem to like singing a lot too.

But, I'm not going to criticize the way people are just because it's different than me. Who ever said my way, or the American way, is better? They all seem way happier in their pictures than I am sitting there looking at their pictures.

Different cultures influence one another and in the Philippines, you can see the many influences like their love for karaoke, or what many call, videoke. That trend started in Japan but was once wildly popular in South Korea. Japanese tourists were once known to take a lot of photos and perhaps that had some influence, but the noticeable difference is how comfortable Filipinos are in front of the camera. I personally find that admirable - they seem to be a lot less fussy or self critical of their appearance than Americans. Terrific. But many take photo taking to an extreme. Maybe it's the digital age combined with social networks - but it gets a bit overdone. Just my observation of bein married to one for 7 years and being around many Filipinos as well as being connected on Facebook. If someone wanted to comment how Americans seem to supersize everything in the appropriate discussion forum, I'd be welcoming the conversation.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 14:35:00

What about Filipinos taking pictures of the food before they eat so they can post it on Facebook and Instagram? Does that annoy you too? hahaha!

I like seeing pics of food! But there's a bit of narcissism when you constantly upload selfies on Facebook just so all your friends will validate your beauty.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 10:44:00

Lol, I hear you. I am a Filipino and I do love taking pictures and love being in the picture, but not to the extent of exaggeration. My husband (american) doesn't like taking pics or being in the picture. His not a camera shy, but he just doesn't care much about it.

You should know the new trend right now which they called "selfie", that every time they get the chance they would take pictures of themselves and post it on social media platform, sometimes it's annoying. Some would even post a picture of themselves with the caption " sleeping" duh,..

Thanks. Yeah, maybe it's a growing global trend but I think most people are self conscious about having their photo taken, but Filipinos feel very comfortable and confident in front of camera...lol! That's great, but how many selfies do you upload to Facebook before you say enough is enough? Yikes.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 10:39:00

Ok, but what prompted you to report this random observation? lol

This is the Philippines forum, bro. We talk about Filipino culture all the time. If you want to hang out here, that's cool, but don't expect us to be talking about chinese food.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 04:22:00

Ummm... what?

If you've ever been to a Filipino party, or are connected to Filipinos on a social network, you'll know what I'm talking about. They're very photogenic, but a bit overboard, IMO.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 04:05:00

I'm not sure if it's a cultural thing, but I haven't met a filipino who is camera shy. They love taking pictures and love being in the picture. Americans aren't as photogenic unless we're celebrities or like to pretend we're famous. Granted, this is the digital age and you longer need to purchase film and then pay to have it developed, but good golly, can we put the camera down for a moment, forget about posing and just enjoy the moments for what they are instead of it turning into an audition?

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-21 02:08:00

Building Filipino Community in the U.S.

I've been here for close to 5 years this November,and I have been back to the Philippines once since I moved to the US permanently. Even before I moved to the US, I was not as festive like any other Filipinos maybe in the country. It's not until Im on the the brink of my 2nd year in the states I started meeting Filipinos in the surrounding areas. But you always learn it the hard way that its your own roots can do such damaging things to yourself. (Gossiping, backstabbing, and "trying to keep up with the Jones") I've always mind my own business anyway but I gave myself the chance to be acquainted to the Filipino culture and share it with fellow Filipinos in the area but I was pretty disappointed with the outcome.I threw my hands up in the air, and say...Fuss it! I have my white and black friends.

My ex-husband was never truly excited of Filipino culture and its traditions. So it was pretty hard to share events and occasions with him which made me even just shrug off any Philippine holidays. I came from a family who celebrates "notche Buena' (night dinner) by Christmas eve, to only me and him --eating in Olive Garden the night before Christmas.

Needless to say, Its important to have Friends esp a group of people that understands and share your own culture. Once you have that circle, choose the ones that you think you can trust, and values friendship. These people are the ones that can make you feel "home" away from home. I am blessed to have few but quality friends to celebrate few Philippine events.

Hi CP! Thanks for sharing! I have noticed among the current Filipino community, a lot of drama (backstabbing, gossip) among some of them. It's gotten to the point that some are choosing sides, so we don't see all the regulars at gatherings anymore because of bad blood. I've noticed that some Filipinos, if they feel they've been crossed by someone, they get very vengeful. I don't go to all the gatherings as much as I used to mainly because a lot of the non-Filipino spouses are not very sociable.

My wife has made lots of non-Filipino friends and she seems content knowing that the Filipino community here is what it is - fun to gather from time to time, but not necessarily people she can confide in. Still, it serves a great purpose in keeping her feeling connected to her roots.

Edited by Porterhouse, 22 January 2014 - 10:07 AM.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-22 10:04:00

Building Filipino Community in the U.S.

Greetings to all the Filipinos here! My wife and stepson our about to celebrate being here in the states now for 7 years! She got her U.S. citizenship last summer and is in her final year at a state university, obtaining her bachelor's as a dental hygienist. It's been a long road for us - many pitfalls and many difficulties that weighed heavily on us. We've lived in two different states during that time and connecting to other Filipinos has been essential to feeling a little less homesick (she hasn't been back). I don't know how she could have made it through without that kind of support from our local Filipino community.

For those Filipinos and their spouses who've been in the states now, how has the transition been for you? Have you connected with any local Filipinos in your community (church)? If so, how important has it been to be able to celebrate familiar traditions and how has your non-Filipino spouse integrated into those celebrations? What do you hope your social life to be like as you two spend your lives together?

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-01-22 04:04:00

Advice of Parents refused.....

I like options one and three. 1. Even though she's not the oldest she's still considered the bread winner for the family. I'll never understand how parents can have so many kids and then pick one to be totally dependent on for support. 2. She has an Aunt that would be willing to go along with this but for now it seems unnecessary. 3. I've read so many time on VJ that it wasn't even asked for at CFO. My fiance is not the she shy type and would be more likely to argue the point rather than accept defeat and walk away silently.

1. Because in poor countries, there are few, if any social safety nets, so children are your social security, especially in the Filipino culture where taking care of your elders is considered your duty. Not much different from rural America before FDR and the New Deal. Ever wonder why your grandparents had so many kids? I'll never understand how guys go searching for poor Filipina girls don't seem to get why these girls are looking to marry a foreigner and leave their families behind when their family is everything to them. Best to figure that one out real quick before marrying her, with or without her parent's blessing, because blood is thicker than water.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-02-04 05:18:00

Why is it so hard to find a good Filipino restaurant?

It?s curious because Filipinos are the second largest Asian population in the US. In a few cities, like Las Vegas, Philippine restaurants are starting to pop up, though. But before we dive into the restaurant scene in Sin City, first let's address this basic question: What exactly is Filipino food?

It?s hard to define, says Cathy Ferrer, a manager with Max?s Restaurant, "Cuisine of the Philippines."

?When you say Filipino food, it?s actually a fusion of many cultures and many countries,? Ferrer says.

Philippine food has Chinese, Malaysian, Spanish and American influences ? all cultures that have shaped the Philippines. Filipinos eat a lot of rice, pork, chicken and, of course, fish ? the Philippines is an archipelago of more than 7,000 islands, after all. All the food is spiced the Philippine way:

?Tons and tons of garlic, soy sauce, vinegar, onions,? says Ferrer

Ferrer helped open the new Max?s in Las Vegas a few months ago. The chain restaurant also has locations in California, Hawaii and New Jersey and has been serving food in the Philippines since 1945.

In Las Vegas, my hosts served me soft Pancit noodles and garlic fried rice and pork ? cooked Philippine Adobo style, braised in soy and vinegar. And, of course, we had to have Max?s famous fried chicken.

?We love crispy stuff,? Ferrer says. ?Deep fried stuff.?

It all tasted good, a bit heavy, but good. The restaurant was appealing. The servers were friendly. So what?s the problem here? Why aren?t more Americans eating Filipino food? Ferrer had one theory.

?We have a term that we call turo-turo: all food is already in a serving dish, and you just point to what you want,? she says.

Turo-turo, which means ?point-point? in Tagalog, is buffet style. Max?s did away with that.

Here?s another problem, as I see it: the food didn?t taste all that different from basic Chinese food. So why switch?

Ferrer says her country?s food actually has quite a few surprises. She says she ordered me the ?safest food? as a sampler.

?They gave you the ?white guy menu,'" says Brock Radke, food editor at Las Vegas Weekly Magazine. ?That happens a lot at ethnic restaurants.?

Radke has tried a fair amount of Philippine food and has good things to say about it. He thinks it hasn?t quite caught on in the US because it's considered rustic, homey food.

"Every time I ask someone, 'What's the best Filipino restaurant in Las Vegas?' most people tell me, 'There really isn't one ... my mom's house,'" Radke says.

He also thinks non-Filipinos might be intimidated, scared off by the food. For example, in the Philippines, fish, sometimes big fish, are served with the head intact. It?s done that way in the US sometimes. To be fair, many other cultures serve fish this way, too.

Radke told me about a bowl of sinagang he recently had at Max?s.

?It?s kind of a sour stew, with really giant chunks of food in it, like whole shrimp and big pieces of bok choy. It?s like they didn?t bother to cut it up. It?s kind of clumsily assembled, but I say that with affection. It?s kind of fun to eat, also.?

I had the same soup. Staring at the shrimp, and it?s many, many legs, well, it was a bit off-putting.

?I think the average suburban Las Vegan would probably be terrified to see a whole shrimp in their soup,? Radke says.

For the record, Radke liked the soup, as did I.

So how exactly does an eclectic cuisine gain acceptance? How did sushi catch on? Thirty years ago, who would?ve thought Americans would develop a love affair with raw fish wrapped in seaweed? What will it take for Filipino food to get to that point?

?It?s hard to say,? Radke says. ?There are a lot of Filipino chefs in Las Vegas. Maybe somebody will, kind of, go the extra mile to put it into some kind of a package that?s a little more friendly and approachable for people.?

http://www.pri.org/s...pino-restaurant

Edited by Porterhouse, 06 February 2014 - 07:53 PM.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-02-06 19:52:00

Seems that a lot has changed...

Good to hear from you and that you and your family are doing well! Best of luck with your citizenship! My wife got hers last summer.

one...two...tree

Male

Philippines

2014-03-28 01:39:00