ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!
ja ja ja da hast du recht es ist schon ziemlich teuer hier aber was soll da muss man halt durch ... und wenn man will kann man es schon hinkriegen ... wie lange warst du hier anne?
MsAMFemaleGermany2007-04-30 11:55:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!

YEA ma endlich jemand in meiner gegend!!!!! bin in northern NJ.... 15 minuten von manhattan entfernt...


na dann muss ich dich ja zu meinen freunden hier machen .... ist ja so ganz nah ... ich wohne in manhattan.
MsAMFemaleGermany2007-04-29 19:25:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!

@MsA: willkommen im deutschen forum!

deiner timeline nach zu urteilen ist es bei dir in ein paar tagen ja auch soweit mit der hochzeit ...



danke anke .... he he he dann werd ich auch alles zusammen stellen oh ja ist jemand in new york oder halt ahnung wie lange alles hier dauert?
MsAMFemaleGermany2007-04-29 17:06:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!
wollte mal schnell hallo sagen zu allen deutschen ... bin neu bei dieser seite aber finde die echt toll!!! :thumbs:
MsAMFemaleGermany2007-04-28 19:37:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!
naja vielleicht wird das wochenende nict so ganz schlimm hab heute mein NOA bekommen und kann jetzt mehr oder weniger mich auf dienstag (unser anniversary :crying: ) auch vorbereiten ... manchmal glaub ich es nicht so ganz aber muss halt durch.

glueckwunsch an alle mommies to be und happy memorial day weekend an alle :thumbs:
MsAMFemaleGermany2010-05-28 17:58:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!
da muss ich wohl durch ...

am 06/01 is our anniversary und ich weiss schon dass wird mal nicht so einfach :crying: aber wenigstens hat USCIS meine papiere erhalten und mal sehen was so noch auf mich zukommt.
MsAMFemaleGermany2010-05-26 12:35:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!
danke an euch alle und ja seine family hilft so gut wie sie koennen aber das taegliche leben ist halt schon schwer! er war halt schon sehr krank und ich finde dass es das beste ist das er nicht mehr leiden muss ... life must go on one way or the other!!!
MsAMFemaleGermany2010-05-24 09:26:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)German people...rührt euch!!
halli hallo aus new york ... es ist mal wieder zeit hier meine journey mit I-751 und ohne meinen USC spouse (due to leukemia ... RIP MyLove!) durch zustehen ... hoping for smooth sailing :unsure: pretty plz!!!
MsAMFemaleGermany2010-05-20 10:09:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)Packet 3 and Medical Appointment

Where are you doing your medical exam?
The doc in Stockholm will send your results straight to the embassy, you don't have to wait for any papers before you send the packet in...



The best would be to ask your doctors (or who ever answers the phone) what to do. When I called to make an appointment I asked if I can send my forms back to the embassy, how much would it take to get the results, and they said the same day.
KlaxiFemaleSerbia2012-03-23 05:40:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)K1 hilfe
Hallo Lene,

entschuldigung für mein Deutsch but ich hoffe du kann alles verstehen :)

So, du muss auch einige Dokumente senden, nich nur deine Verlobte.

Du brauchst:

- 4 fotografien mit deine Unterschrift im Hintergrund
- Bestätigung das du nicht verharaitet bist
- Formular G325A ausfüllen
- Die Geschichte von Ihrer Beziehung schreiben

Er schickt das alles mit seine Dokumenten.

Ich hoffe das hilft.


Liebe Grüsse!
KlaxiFemaleSerbia2012-04-06 11:30:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)Bosnia and Herzegovina

Dragi prijatelji,

imala bi jedno vazno pitanje. Naime evo vec neko vrijeme pretrazujem po ovom forumu, a nikako da naidjem na odgovor na moje pitanje. Bila bi jako jako zahvalna ako bi mi neko dao upute kako sta ili bi mi ukazao gdje se to tacno na forumu nalazi

Imam B2 turisticku vizu na deset godina. Nedavno sam se vratila uz US gdje sam boravila turisticki 21 dan
Naime u US imam momka odnedavno ali vec imamo ozbiljne planove. Ja sam sada u Bosni, a on zivi tamo. Momak je isto tako Bosanac ali ima US drzavljanstvo
Mozete li mi reci sta je pametno ciniti u toj situaciji? Cula sam da je vjerenicka viza malo duzi proces da se ceka. Da li je moguce otici u US na turisticku vizu i vjencati se u US? Ili se vjencanje pak treba obaviti u Bosni

Bila bi Vam jako zahvalna ako biste me uputili na prave linkove, potpuno sam nova u ovome, a zelim da se raspitam sta mi je najbrza opcija?

Hvala mnogo!


Pa sve zavisi od tebe, naravno da mozes da odes tamo i vencas se, ali to nije po zakonu! Ja sam se odlucila za verenicku K-1 vizu, jer nisam zelela da na bilo koji nacin radim nesto ilegalno. Isto imam turisticku vizu na 10 godina, ali po cenu malo duzeg cekanja zelim da sve ide po proceduri :)
KlaxiFemaleSerbia2012-04-01 12:54:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)SERBIA
Miriam, nadam se da ce ti mama biti bolje.

Superlove, ja sam ranije uvek citala da ako ides sa bebom koja je USA drzavljanin, cekas red sa njom iako ti nisi jos drzavljanin.
Ja, doduse, imam GC ali sam odmah krenula u red za drzavljane, zbog bebe.
E sad, ja sam nekim sluzbenicima tamo rekla da me puste preko reda, medjutim ili se prave ludi ili sta, cekali smo red od nekih 30-tak ljudi. I kad smo dosli skoro do saltera, jedna sluzbenica mi kaze:Jao, pa sto se niste javili da vas pustim sa bebom.

Mada, kako u Americi tretiraju trudnice i majke sa decom po prevozu, nista me ne cudi kad vas ni ne primete da cekate s malom bebom.






KlaxiFemaleSerbia2014-08-29 11:33:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)SERBIA
A neee, idem sa muzem i detetom. Ali pitala sam na drugom podforumu, ne treba vza za Permanent Resident, evo i link: http://www.cbsa-asfc...v-eng.html#_s2a

Nego, najsigurnije mi da cujem od nekog sa nasim pasosem :)

A izjava mi nije trebala kad sam putovala po Evropi, samo su mi u turistickoj agenciji kad sam htela u Grcku ili Tursku rekli da mora izjava, jer su Turci strogi sto se toga tice.




KlaxiFemaleSerbia2014-07-29 21:39:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)SERBIA
Da li je neko ko ima zelenu kartu putovao u Kanadu??

Planiram put i zanima me da li nam treba viza sa zelenom kartom? Pretpostavljam da ne?


KlaxiFemaleSerbia2014-07-29 05:57:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)SERBIA

Inace, sad ja da pitam za pomoc :)

 

Jel neko putovao sa decom bez muza? Znam da mi Amerikanci ne traze nikakvu potvrdu, ali izgleda da svi ostali traze??? Jel ima neko iskustva sa tim. I gde se u USA vadi ta potvrda?

 


KlaxiFemaleSerbia2014-06-11 12:03:00
Europe & Eurasia (except the UK and Russia)SERBIA
@miriam28, mozes i u Srbiji da prijavis, nego sam ja zapocela sve u NY misleci da cu tu zavrsiti i pasos, ali sam se kasno setila, pa nije bilo vremena.

Moje misljenje je, da ako cete menjati pasos tek kad se vratite u USA, onda putujte sa starim prezimenom. Ako cete u Srbiji, onda s novim.
Ja imam i dete, pa nisam nazad htela da se vracam sa starim prezimenom i novim pasosem, jer se ja u njenim dokumentima vodim sa novim prezimenom i nisam zelela da me zbog toga proveravaju.

Takodje, nisam cula da je iko vracen jer je imao razlicito prezime zbog udaje. To je specificna situacija sa kojom su upoznati na aerodromu i vencani list je dovoljan da se prodje.

Nemoj uopste da razmisljas o tome, neke zene tako putuju godinama, sa razlicitim prezimenima u pasosu i na americkim dokumentima/karti.
Da napomenem da sam vise puta putovala avionom i u okviru USA, isti slucaj, karta na novo, prezime na staro, i uvek je vencani list resavao 'problem'.

Edited by Klaxi, 11 June 2014 - 12:14 AM.









KlaxiFemaleSerbia2014-06-11 00:13:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusShe Dumped Me!!
QUOTE (kd4uvc @ Mar 10 2008, 02:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They, the biddies, have convinced her that I will bring her here and dump her on the streets. Now, why would I spend so much money and just do that?


Why is it so difficult for guys to read the 38-point, boldfaced writing on the wall? This woman does not love you, she does not even like you, she has no respect for you. If you continue down this path with her you'll be milked for everything she can get from you and then finally tossed aside. Her behavior isn't something that stems from cultural differences or because her friends have brainwashed her. (Quite the opposite, really: I'd bet my next paycheck that her girlfriends admire and envy her for the way she has played you. Only a virtuoso could treat a guy like garbage and then have him crawling back for more.)

QUOTE
We each have our own standards.


We sure do.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-03-25 14:12:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusWorking in the USA question
QUOTE (eekee @ Apr 14 2008, 12:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why not?

QUOTE (groovlstk @ Apr 14 2008, 10:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Whatever you do, do not allow your fiancee to fall into the trap of working for Russian firms or Russian people when she arrives.



I know a good number of Russian people in the NYC area. All who work for Russians or Russian firms are paid a pittance and treated poorly. The managers of such firms know that most expats come to work for them because their English is not up to snuff or they don't yet have the confidence to leave their comfort zones, which gives them wide lattitude for abuse. (And this is not a knock against Russians - many immigrants are subject to this if they are reluctant to integrate yet want to work).

We have friends who've been in the US for 8+ years, and those working for Russian firms can't speak a lick of English - and they probably never will because they never leave their protective Russian enclaves. I've noticed that those Russians who never integrated are, in general, unhappy with their lives here and very critical of the US. I've also noted exactly the opposite in those who learned English, have American friends, etc.

On a separate note, I'd encourage guys who have fiancees planning to work in the US when they arrive to be protective but not cloying. My wife accepted her first two job offers yet quit after a single day at each. There are companies out there, small firms in particular, that will see her immigrant status and lack of perfect English as an opportunity to exploit her. Be it for something as heinous as requiring sex or simpler abuses like no vacation time and long hours, involve yourself in her job search and be patient. If she hates her work it's bound to carry over into her personal life; a little patience and understanding while she finds a job she enjoys can go a long way.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-15 12:20:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusWorking in the USA question
Whatever you do, do not allow your fiancee to fall into the trap of working for Russian firms or Russian people when she arrives.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-14 09:57:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusGodzillas hostel?
QUOTE (Satellite @ Apr 24 2008, 11:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I should go back to Moscow and lease a place for a year, furnish it, and sublease it too all the westerners needing a place to house their loved ones during the interview process. Profit can be had! What do you think Slim, joint venture? tongue.gif Leasing a place a for a year would probably only run about $500 - $800 a month. At $100 a day you could recoup that in a week!


Two years ago this month I spent $70 per night for this place, which is a block from the Belaruskaya metro station:
http://arendakvart.n...tevskaya23.html

As you can see the price is closer to $110 per night, now. As a previous poster wrote, you are not going to find a decent place she can stay alone in within the garden ring for $50 per night, not going to happen even if you were a local.

You should also be aware that this whole process doesn't get less expensive once she arrives. Please know that if you're nickel and diming over a few hundred dollars now, you may really struggle when she is here.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-25 12:23:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussia girls are amazing!
QUOTE (Ilya R. @ Apr 29 2008, 12:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Fetisov is awesome, I've played with Kasatonov who also was part of devils when Fetisov played. I have few pics with Fetisov which I treasure dearly!


You know then that Fetisov and Kasatonov had a big falling out before coming to the US? When they both played for the NJ Devils, they refused to speak or acknowledge each other to the point where it drove their teammates crazy. The team would have to split into two separate groups when going out to restaurants, etc. because they refused to go out together. I'd always hoped that they'd reconcile someday...

Kasatonov was the better player at that point in their careers but Fetisov had the stones to rebel against the Soviet system without defecting. I remember reading about how much he hated the successful Red Army coach, Viktor Tikhanov, because he felt he was responsible for the death of a friend and teammate (I believe his name was Valeri Kharlamov). Tikhanov controlled every aspect of his players' lives, including how often they saw their wives and children. At one point Kharlamov was in Tikhanov's doghouse and when he asked that repairs be made to his car's brakes, Tikhanov refused. Soon after Kharlmov died in an auto accident when his brakes failed.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-29 12:18:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussia girls are amazing!
QUOTE (eekee @ Apr 28 2008, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I've skated a few times before, and I used to be really into street hockey as a kid. I learned how to skate using hockey ice skates, and when i went to Russia and skated with figure skates I was informed that I skated boy-style, like you do when you wear hockey skates. I didn't even know there were boy and girl skating styles. tongue.gif maybe if i learned girl-skating, I could walk like a Russian on ice. yes.gif


I've played ice hockey for more than 30 years, although since my wife arrived I haven't had the proper time to devote to it (and most likely never will...).

One of the highlights of my hockey days was playing with Slava Fetisov during summers when he was part of the NJ Devils team and wanted to stretch his legs before training camp began. He was mostly past his prime when he left the Red Army team to play in the NHL, but all the players who followed him in later years should kiss his feet for blazing the trail.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-29 09:58:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussia girls are amazing!
QUOTE (seanconneryii @ Apr 28 2008, 04:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (eekee @ Apr 28 2008, 04:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Of course i know that russians wear their rings on their right hand. My mom did as well.

For the record, I also have single male russian friends who hooked up with said married girls. The attitude about married people seems to be, male or female, is that their marital issues are not your business and if someone is cheating it just means their marriage is bad and it's not immoral to sleep with them. This is what people in russia have said to me about this issue. This one woman i know accused her boyfriend's wife of stealing "her" man. laughing.gif

QUOTE (seanconneryii @ Apr 28 2008, 04:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I hope you remembered that Russians wear their wedding rings on the right hand. Nonetheless, seeing a ring on someone's hand and making judgments about them is weak in my view. Unless you actually know their martial status, you can't really be sure of very much.

And maybe some were married but separated, as can be the case in the USA. I've seen US women I know were separated still wearing their rings...what does that really tell me?


This may be a generational issue...the way the young Russians are operating in the big cities. Doesn't sound like what I've heard from the older Russians I've hung out with. If a Russian man heard his wife was hanging out at a bar kissing all the guys in the place (and the word would get back to him), I think there'd be hell to pay for the wife. OK for the guys to have lovers...not for the women. That is the Russia I hear about.


There are plenty of married Russian women who cheat on their husbands, it's simply something they do surreptitiously. I believe the myth that Russian men are "bad" (alcoholics, serial adulterers, etc.) is the kind of stuff spewed by marriage agencies that want western guys to believe their penpals are sweet, innocent wallflowers. From my experience Russian women are much more sexually sophisticated than their Western counterparts, have fewer hangups, and won't stigmatize a friend or colleague who is cheating.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-28 16:06:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussia girls are amazing!
QUOTE (seanconneryii @ Apr 7 2008, 05:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
As I said, living together in Russia with the comfort of her native language and surroundings, tells very little about her success in the USA.

The rest of what you said is common sense so I have no further comment except one week together (24/7) is equal to dating and American woman for several months if you consider that dating might only entail meeting once or twice a week for 4 or 5 hours on a date...so you should consider that to be fair.


IMHO you're putting too much emphasis on a woman's ability to make a go at life in the US.

If what you share with your wife is love and not some facsimile, it's not that big of a sacrifice. I don't mean to shrug off the difficulty of making such a monumental transition, but in my experience it was just one of many compromises and sacrifices my wife and I made that were necessary to make our relationship work. I will say, however, that without love we would have failed within the first six months.

I dated a lot of Russian women living in the US before I met my wife, almost all arrived here on K1s and divorced after a few years. Never did I hear the excuse that the divorce resulted from difficulty in adjusting to life here; rather, most women married puppylove-struck guys whom they liked and trusted and with whom they hoped they could one day love. (And those were the decent women, others were far more calculating.) Some time after arrival, stress and loneliness - not love - entered her life and things fell apart. The curious thing is that the guy in such failed relationships always has some excuse - her friends whispered lies in her ears, she missed her mom too much, she had difficulty learning English, etc., etc. He can't accept the simple fact that she never loved him and never could.

I think Kazan Tiger did it right - love was in his equation before he filed the K1, he won the battle on her turf, he did things in their proper order and took the time to make sure it was genuine. Was four years too much? I don't know, but I'd put a lot more stock in his chances than the guys who spend a week with a girl who can't speak English and believe her when she says "I love you, too."
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-08 08:27:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussia girls are amazing!
QUOTE (seanconneryii @ Apr 3 2008, 11:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
And you living with her for one year is very unique...and I wonder why so long but that's really your business. Clearly very few of us can or would want to spend a year in an environment that does not resemble the ultimate world we must share with our wives down the road. And if you fail, you've given up one year and all the associated sacrifices you made. That's a lot of risk to accept, in my eyes...but then, you're a younger man so maybe you see it differently.


A greater risk than wasting a year of one's life is spending a week or two with a Russian woman and then proposing to her. I see all kinds of wacky stuff on these boards by guys (like sense1) who are willing to throw caution to the wind and insist they're simply true romantics who are trusting their instincts. The original poster and his wife deserve credit for taking the time to get to know each other before making such a serious commitment. In terms of pure risk, I'd bet that they'll be together long after the guys who propose to women they can't have a conversation with sans interpreter, the guys who propose after an internet correspondence + week's vacation together, and those who simply don't know their partners. They risk being used for a green card, bought up on domestic violence charges to expedite residency, or worse...

FWIW, being able to live for a year in Russia is impossible for most of us who have careers, but if you marry a stranger from a (relatively) poor land, don't come crying to papa when the blindfold is ripped from your face and you realize you are a latter-day version of the pheasant who swam across the river w/the fox on his back, only to have the fox eat him upon arriving at the opposite bank. headbonk.gif
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-04-07 13:35:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusMy closing comments
QUOTE (slim @ May 20 2008, 09:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
However, when it gets to the point of causing stress..... it's time to bust out that playstation.


My wife and I sometimes play 1 on 1 in Call of Duty IV on our PS3. She's so funny, we'll be having dinner and she'll suddenly say (oh-so-innocently), "let's shoot each other tonight."
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-05-20 14:12:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusMy closing comments
QUOTE (jsouthwick @ May 20 2008, 10:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Although my wife has met a few Russian women that will not, absolutely not return to Russia for any reason, even to visit family members. This she atributes to their total embracement of American attitudes, chasing the almighty buck and striving to get ahead. Who knows.


Strangely enough, before I met my wife I dated a lot of Russian women living in the US. Many arrived here on K1s and divorced, and were extremely bitter about Americans and American life in general. If I was a safe enough distance away I'd always follow up by asking, "if you aren't happy here, why don't you return home?" I never got a straight answer.

Dealing w/the USCIS and logistics of all this is cake compared with the actual marriage part. The accounts of others, particularly during the adjustment period, are ultimately more valuable than anything else you read here.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-05-20 14:05:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFavorite Pictures in Russia
QUOTE (kud @ Feb 14 2008, 10:18 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Even with that it hasn't been easy. The cultural differences can be tough to deal with. We came close to calling it quits a few times. But her toughness trumps my stubbornness thank GOD. So live goes on. I do hope all of you will be happy in the end.


I can only shake my head when my married friends (American couples) talk about their disagreements and issues - usually silly stuff like they're arguing over where to go for their next vacation, whose turn it is to clean the bathroom, etc. That stuff is so trivial compared w/the challenges we faced (and continue to face, only less often, thankfully).

It sounds trite and cliched, but if you both have a lot of love and at least a little patience to avoid doing anything stupid when disagreements/misunderstandings crop up, everything will be fine.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-02-14 13:05:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFavorite Pictures in Russia
My experience has been similar to Slim's, although in the last few months my wife has opened up to two couple friends of ours (both Russian couples) and now almost every week we make plans to hang out with them. It took a long time before she was able to trust them enough to get close, however. During her first year here, we spent every moment (outside of work) together except for a single evening when she went to see a Broadway play with the wives of the aforementioned couple. And it wasn't easy, I think I got about 100 text messages from her while we were apart. And please don't get the impression that my wife's a wallflower. She takes the subway to work every day, doesn't hesitate to stand up for herself, has many friends in her native Moscow, and enjoys a rich professional life.

I'm not complaining as we genuinely love each other's company, but if you're a very social person accustomed to contemporary western relationships (wherein it's not odd for a woman and man to have their own exclusive social circles) I'm sure it can be exhausting.

From my experience, there are two factors at work in this phenomenon:

1) Sorry to say it, but it's not easy to find decent Russian woman/Western man couples in the US. Every female my wife met who came here on a K1 instantly grilled her about our income, cars, home, etc. They clearly had no love for their (often much) older husbands and were in it for the upscale lifestyle. Many of these women were shockingly frank about the lovers they took to fulfill their sexual needs, and my wife wanted nothing to do w/them.

Also, I'll never forget the first parties we went to at Russian homes. Always there were several unattached Russian men who hovered about, my wife explained later that they expected our marriage to be a sham and were hoping she'd be looking for a relationship on the side. wacko.gif I'm sure most of you who've gotten as far as the K1 stage know that there will be plenty of American people who will be very skeptical about your relationship when she arrives. Be prepared for local Russians to share the same skepticism, only they won't be sympathetic to you.

2) Your own friends may accept her instantly but more likely they'll be skeptical about her and decide to wait and see. While my friends weren't cold to her, they were obviously waiting to see if she genuinely loved me before warming up.

Anyway, my advice would be to abandon your expectations for her in regards to friends, never pressure her and be prepared to abandon any friends who don't accept her.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-02-13 13:53:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusThe Interview...Russian Or English??
My original comment was mostly facetious, quite frankly it would be a nightmare to have a CO probe into the specifics of a relationship in order to determine whether or not to issue a visa. (I believe they DO practice this to a very limited extent, however.)

To play devil's advocate, upthread Turboguy complained that his ex-fiancee had the interview from h*ll at the Moscow embassy. TG, since that K1 didn't work out, do you not think the CO might have had more than an inkling that things would go belly up for you both very quickly?

To get back on topic... my wife was really nervous for her interview and initially asked that it be conducted in Russian. However, the CO who interviewed her spoke fairly lousy Russian so my wife switched to English (much to the CO's relief).
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-06-27 16:42:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusThe Interview...Russian Or English??
QUOTE (slim @ Jun 27 2008, 02:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I disagree. The C/O's main purpose is to ascertain if the petitioner and beneficiary are complying with the law in terms of getting the visa applied for. They're not there to be the "marriage police" or screen for possible marital problems down the road.


Then why do the COs ask questions like "what is your husband's profession?" or "what is your fiance's father's name?" when all that proof is documented within the petition that sits on his desk during the interview? It seems they do have a role - albeit very limited - in determining that there is a basis for a relationship beyond vacation photos together, emails, and copies of boarding passes. Or am I incorrect?

QUOTE
And truthfully, if they were, then none of us would've gotten a visa because marrying someone from a foreign country that you barely know has all the makings of disaster. So does marrying someone from right next door. Over half the marriages in the U.S. end in divorce so strictly speaking, they could deny everyone!


There's a difference between marrying someone you've never spent more than two weeks at a time with and marrying a complete stranger. I know guys who've used marriage agencies and caved under pressure from the agency owner who insisted that it's perfectly appropriate - indeed expected - for an American to propose to one of his girls after spending 3-4 days together, despite the fact that she can't speak a word of English whistling.gif I'd be willing to bet that the standard 50% divorce rate nearly doubles under such circumstances.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-06-27 14:17:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusThe Interview...Russian Or English??
QUOTE (MarkandLada @ Jun 27 2008, 01:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
While I agree with that statement, I was simply referring to unnecessary abusive, condescending, or general poor treatment. I would think that the obvious non-legit applicants tend to stand out.


Funny enough, my wife had nothing but praise for the American employees at the Moscow embassy, particularly her CO. It was the Russian employees who checked to make sure all the applicants had their docs in order prior to their interviews who treated everyone shabbily.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-06-27 14:02:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusThe Interview...Russian Or English??
QUOTE (MarkandLada @ Jun 27 2008, 09:47 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If they are gone, then that is a good thing. These ladies do not need any more undue stress!


Considering the number of failures I'd say that the COs should be more inquisitive - they'd save time, money, and heartache for many involved in this pursuit who choose to marry virtual strangers after a few days of face time together.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-06-27 12:04:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusAmerican movies!
QUOTE (slim @ Jun 25 2008, 01:01 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm also highly anticipating HBO's Generation Kill that comes out next month. I loved the FX original show Over There but for some reason it was only on for one season. Hopefully Generation Kill will take over where it left off.


I saw a screening of the first episode of Gen Kill, it's awesome. It's going to be a 7-part series; movies and series about Iraq have been a huge bust for most studios, but HBO isn't beholden to advertisers or ratings as much as other networks.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-06-25 15:30:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusAmerican movies!
If you have HBO, look for the movie PU-239. Don't be put off by the odd title!

It's about a Russian husband and father who works in a Russian nuke plant during the 90s. Things are falling apart and he's warned management that the conditions are unsafe. The unthinkable happens and he's exposed to a lethal dose of radiation. Instead of helping him the plant managers fire him. He knows he's a dead man walking and steals a portion of weapons grade plutonium in hopes of selling it in Moscow to provide for his family when he's gone.

It's tremendously sad and brutal, and funny in parts. I can't believe I was actually rooting for him to sell the stuff before the end of the movie blush.gif
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-06-24 12:35:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFriend Gets Goodbye Email from Fiance
Korat,

I won't comment on your accusations about this girl, only to say that I wouldn't be surprised in the least if the gist of your account was true; girls like this are all too common in the MOB world but most guys involved are afraid to look behind the mirrors.

That said, I think you should take a step back and analyze your own behavior. Don't you think it's odd that years after this woman screwed you over, you're still tracking her every move? Do you think you come off as rational when you pry into her personal life and seek out snitches like hospital workers and bank managers?

And most of all: do you really think anyone here believes you're doing it to protect other men? Here's a bulletin for you: you're doing it for yourself (although I'm sure on some level you know that).

Nadya may have screwed you over and part of your motivation is surely revenge, but no one would hang on this long unless they were lovesick. I've met guys like you before, and the unspoken motivation obvious to anyone but him is, "if I can't have her, no one else will." There's also the (ridiculous to anyone but you) notion that you are somehow responsible for her behavior because you "spoiled" her long ago, and thus feel a guilty responsibility to protect other guys from her. So noble of you! But the white armor you're flashing to everyone here is actually the emperor's new clothes; or better yet, the armor is a sad green mix of envy, jealousy, bitterness, and unrequited love.

And you accuse Kurt of living in a fantasy world??? headbonk.gif

One question: does your current "fiancee" know that you track your ex's every move and sabotage her attempts at scamming others? I'd bet my next paycheck that she has no idea about your crusade and no matter how much you've managed to deceive yourself about your motivations, you are wily enough to keep this off her radar because you know she'd dump you if she saw how obsessed you are with Nadya. Sound about right?

Dude, get over her, move on or you'll drown in your own bilious poison.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-07-23 09:15:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFriend Gets Goodbye Email from Fiance
QUOTE (khengool @ Jul 11 2008, 03:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A few questions:

If the chick loved the guy, but not the American economy, why didn't she just ask him to live in her home country?


Because for a guy whose relationship is grounded in fantasy it's a lot easier to attribute her indifference to him on cultural differences or other such nonsense whistling.gif
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-07-11 16:37:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFriend Gets Goodbye Email from Fiance
QUOTE (mox @ Jul 10 2008, 03:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Understood, but what I mean is that a woman who is predisposed to going after the next best thing is going to do it no matter what her stated motives. With any marriage, especially of the K variety, you go in with certain expectations. Those expectations may be a loving relationship, or one of convenience as Chuckles describes. In either case, there is a trust factor. A woman who professes to love you is not going to be any more or less trustworthy than a woman who agrees to a marriage of convenience.


The devil's in the details, of course. Sure a woman who professes to love you can be lying. By taking the time to get to know her before proposing, however, you can at least mitigate this risk. I haven't seen anyone posting here who willingly married a Russian woman knowing it was a marriage of convenience, and IMHO any guy so p****whipped to beg for a role as a sperm bank with a checkbook just to have the attention of a pretty Russian wife deserves the sad fate that certainly awaits him.

FWIW, I realized when I proposed to my wife that we had additional risks due to culture and language. As you can probably guess from my posts I'm fairly skeptical, but when I slipped the ring on her finger there was absolutely no doubt in my mind that she loved me (and to this day I still don't understand how she could have fallen for a bum like me).

(AFAIK, there was nothing in the OP's tale that indicated his friend was willing to marry for convenience, so this discussion is purely hypothetical.)

Edited by groovlstk, 10 July 2008 - 03:22 PM.

groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-07-10 15:20:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFriend Gets Goodbye Email from Fiance
QUOTE (mox @ Jul 10 2008, 03:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (groovlstk @ Jul 10 2008, 12:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Happy? Maybe for a short time. Unless a guy's extraordinarily wealthy, what's to prevent his Russian wife from upgrading once she arrives in the land of plenty? Not much! If she's young and attractive she'll have plenty of suitors to choose from when she's here.

Not sure I understand the point. This could be said of any marriage.


I'd thought it was obvious, but a woman who actually loves you isn't going to be constantly on the lookout to upgrade her relationship. A woman who marries simply for a $better lifestyle$ has nothing, outside of the material comforts you provide, to keep her from straying.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-07-10 14:35:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFriend Gets Goodbye Email from Fiance
QUOTE (Chuckles @ Jul 10 2008, 02:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Is she marrying him for the money? Probably.

If that bothers him, then he needs to leave. If it doesn't bother them, they can still be happy.

No point in judging people. Love is not always the cornerstone of marriage. That is a modern, western ideal.


Happy? Maybe for a short time. Unless a guy's extraordinarily wealthy, what's to prevent his Russian wife from upgrading once she arrives in the land of plenty? Not much! If she's young and attractive she'll have plenty of suitors to choose from when she's here.
groovlstkNot TellingRussia2008-07-10 14:16:00