ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusMarrying in Russia
Maybe better to celebrate wedding and do church ceremony but actually get married here in US?If it speeds up the process...
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-12-16 12:09:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusPertussis
OMg Vika is so cute:))))how is she adjusting here?Kids are nice at her school?Or not so much?what about Language?any trouble?
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-12-16 12:07:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusGoing back to Russia to renew a passport
My pasport expires in summer 2009and i will change it in san francisco after my trip to russia..I wuold not risk to do it in russian-dont want to be stuck there for another year
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-09-19 18:55:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusNotice The Signature Update
QUOTE (Thomas-n-Elena @ Nov 16 2008, 08:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
That is awesome news, finally the wait is over now the journey begins. Congrats to both of you. Welcome to America Alla sorry about the economy.



Yeah economy sucks right now...but it is getting better!
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-11-17 18:35:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusNotice The Signature Update
OMG!!!!!!!!finally!I can not believe it finally happened to you guys")))Happy for you!congratulations!
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-11-13 18:16:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow do you keep romance?
I do foot massages too:))he loves that,but thats more sweet rather than sexual...
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-12-19 13:38:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow do you keep romance?
QUOTE (mox @ Dec 16 2008, 09:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Kotenochek @ Dec 16 2008, 09:03 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You Guys are so funny:)))My husband buys me roses pretty often,I nearly always have fresh ones:)From my side i do a lot of private "halloween"parties,where for example yesterday i was a "maid"lol
Well if i get what i want why not give my "Master"lol what he wishes:))))

Great Kotenochek, now we're going to get a bunch of drive-bys from the other forums complaining about how you are terrible because you objectify Russian women. laughing.gif



Hahaha,no not at all,I love my husband and love to see his face each time i dress up:))thats it:P
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-12-16 12:18:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow do you keep romance?
QUOTE (slim @ Dec 16 2008, 11:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I can do a pretty good "worm" as well. (Dancing of course, if we were talking about other stuff, it'd be more like a boa or python or something else that's both cylindrical and GINORMOUS.)

In all seriousness, my ol' Russian girlfriend, before my wife, she used to call me "slonik" and my wife was saying something the other day about "hubbit." Those aren't references to my weight.....



You Guys are so funny:)))My husband buys me roses pretty often,I nearly always have fresh ones:)From my side i do a lot of private "halloween"parties,where for example yesterday i was a "maid"lol
Well if i get what i want why not give my "Master"lol what he wishes:))))
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-12-16 12:03:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow do you keep romance?
I have a question to All of You!

I am sure it is hard for everyone to keep relationship on high at all times...Well lets face it we all come from different backgrounds,different cultures...and plus this economy stress...

So my question is:How do You feel right now about your relationships and how do You keep Your romance high?
KotenochekFemaleRussia2008-12-03 18:19:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusInternational Women's Day
Are you paying her car payments?smile.gif)))
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-03-22 20:45:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusGuys - what did you do to celebrate women's day for your SO or wife?
We both decided it is stupid to support hallmark holidays,so we both bought satellite radios for our cars:)))way more fun:)))
surprises are hard to do when you come from such a different cultures,so we decided from now on we will just plan things to do for fun together instead of surprises that leave us disappointed....:)More fun and less money wasted wink.gif
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-03-22 20:42:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusEasing the transition to the U.S.
Make sure she learns to drive in her country-its cheaper,so when she gets here she gets license right away!
Get her a car -that will solve half of the problems so she does not to feel trapped!

The best would be to get her into some kind of school while waiting for her papers to work.
Economy is bad so it will be hard to find a job right away..Do not try to find more Russians to be her friends.I was very disappointed that most of Eastern europeans in US are scam artists,now I know why Americans think all Russians are bad guys....
It is a long process to find the right friends...
So warn her that Russians in Russia and In USA are two different nations:))))Some might not agree,but that is so true and if you have not discovered it yet,believe me you will!!!!
It is very hard to find a true Russian friend that is not a scam bag or a whiner(complaining about her life and husband and still living it:))Maybe i am harsh but i am honest!:)

As for buying her hair stuff such a flat iron the best one is:GHD try to get some friend to buy it in a beauty supply store its 100$cheaper there!
Buy her some hair shampoos,depending on her hair type.so she notices you tried:)
But all that is not as necessary as knowledge of the local mentality! It is going to be shocking,just be ready to deal with it:)
I been here almost 2 years now and i think i am adjusted more or less:)I finally enjoy America:)

Edited by Kotenochek, 22 March 2009 - 08:37 PM.

KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-03-22 20:32:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusMoscow approval
congratulations!thats a great news:)
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-03-28 15:34:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusEnglish for Russian ...men
QUOTE (slim @ Mar 24 2009, 10:29 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Nobody here believes me when I tell them girls like her are "average Russian girls." (Gorgeous, intelligent, fun.... all pretty normalna for Russkayas, nyet?)



yeah pretty much:))))
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-03-28 15:36:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusEnglish for Russian ...men
Haha she is cool:))))loved her videos:)She is hot too! good.gif
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-03-22 20:54:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusDoes Evidence Need to be Translated?
I know you already were told No,but i confirm it!Because i know how anxious you get about anything little during this process...
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-04-09 17:54:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFailing relationships
Ok Guys,first I want to thank you all for trying to give advices:)))You are the best!!!
I am sorry to be away for a while had to work on a relationship...
So .I took all of your advices and started very aggressively search for a job.I asked all people I know to help me...Tomorrow I already have an interview..Hopefully something will come out of this...
I think if I have my full time job and always gone,he will realize what he is missing on and time we spend together will turn into a quality time...


Slim,you are right my husband is a great guy,I just guess this is a 2 year crisis....Just got to live through this and see how it goes...
I also agree with all stuff you wrote there...It is all true!!!!I wish government made it easier on couples to give them more dating time before marriage.It is just crazy to get married within 90 days!

P>S> never meant to say American guys are bad...Just trying to figure out His(AMERICAN) mentality smile.gif))

Edited by Kotenochek, 11 May 2009 - 02:10 AM.

KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-05-11 02:08:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusFailing relationships
QUOTE (slim @ May 7 2009, 12:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I've actually tried to post some of the "bad" stuff here because I believe the other part of our Visa Journey (The unofficial stuff that doesn't directly deal with visas, immigration, paperwork, etc. - The everyday life stuff.) is just as important, maybe more so, than the visa. My wife wasn't thrilled when I shared some personal details here on the forum but I think it's a great place to get feedback and advice and to also help us realize we're not alone and many of us here are going through similar situations. Sure, we're not all best friends, but we're not really strangers either. Some things we can share because we don't really know each other but other things we try to keep private when really, we should be sharing. I made a good friend through VJ, met in person, and wouldn't feel funny sharing anything with him or his wife. Several others here on the forum I've never met but I'm pretty sure we'd be good buddies too. (On that note, it's time to get a VJ Russia Forum meetup going!) Anyway, we're all going through something, and maybe what you're going through is exactly what someone else needs to hear. So, that's my little plea to everyone to open up a little more. Don't feel like you have to keep everything private. Share!


OK - Kotenochek, from the limited bit of things you've posted about your husband, he seems like a pretty good guy, and what sounds like is happening is just the lull that naturally occurs once the fire and passion and the "newness" of being together wears off and the daily grind sets in. My wife absolutely HATED me for about a year (OK, more like two years) because she expected all those nice things that I did while we were still in the "warming up" stages to continue indefinitely. I'm telling you, as a man, I'm not going to buy flowers all the time. I'm not going to go out of my way to be romantic, all the time. As a matter of fact, now that we've been married for a while, dare I say, I shouldn't have to. - And that's where the problems start.

See, women expect a man to always be that guy. The guy who they fell in love with, the guy who waited out in the rain for two hours, the guy who held their hair while they puked (bad example, but you get the point) the guy who cared about them and asked them how their day was. That nice, wonderful, loving, adoring guy.

Men, on the other hand, expect that she will be that same girl. That girl who didn't care if he went out with his buddies because they'd catch up later. That girl who didn't care if he wore pants with wrinkles in them. That girl who would "surprise him" while he was driving to dinner. That girl who was fun to be around, who didn't care if he wanted to do his own thing, who didn't really make a big deal about anything except spending time together once in a while.

And what happened?

He turned into the guy who stopped trying. Who was unwilling to go the extra mile. The guy who would rather watch TV than give his wife a massage. She turned into the girl who now, instead of saying, "I'll see you later" said, "You better see me now or else there won't be a later." That funky spontaneity was gone, and everything turned all serious!

Why?

Well, short answer is you went from "dating" (and trying to impress upon each other 100% of your good qualities and mutual interests) to "cohabitating" (living together and sharing every single little itty bitty piece and intricate detail of your entire life) and now there's no more room for 100% to be good. Bad things are a part of life, and they have to be dealt with together.

It's hard to do. Especially in cases like ours where you take two adult people who are accustomed to living totally separate lives and then try to mesh them into one, and do it in a hurry. Usually the cohabitating stage can be prolonged before marriage and serious relationships develop over time. She leaves a toothbrush. He has a drawer. She stays over more and more. Then they decide to be together forever. In our cases, we jump in head first then have to sort out who gets which drawer and where our toothbrushes go.

And it's an ongoing process. My wife and I celebrated our second anniversary with a nice dinner and toasted to getting divorced. We seriously were at that point where we just could not stand each other anymore and both of us were ready to throw in the towel. We actually sat there and told each other how pissed off we'd become and then drank to getting it over with. The weird thing is, that was kind of a release for both of us. Once we took that stress off each other, and started doing our own thing, it started working out pretty good. Right now, she's in Florida with a buddy of hers and I'm here at home. Why? Because that's what she wanted to do and I'm glad she's doing something to make herself happy. When she makes herself hapy... I DON'T HAVE TO!!!! When the obligation is gone, and you're free to enjoy yourself, it's a lot more fun to enjoy together.

Men and women are different. The person you married isn't exactly who you thought they'd be, but you do like each other. If you take the stress off of trying to make it work, and just let it naturally work itself out, it will. There are going to be rough spots and things that don't seem all that great, but if you do your own thing and make yourself happy through them, then your partner is free to do so as well. You can't make your partner happy when you're not happy yourself. And really, it's not your job to make your partner happy, it's their job to be happy together with you. If they're not, you can work on it together, but really, it's up to them. Trying to "make them happy" will not only NOT make them happy, but it won't make you happy either. Make yourself happy, and your partner will most likely be happier with you having done so.

There's an interesting video out there, maybe you should watch it. The guy pretty much sums up the interesting dynamic of the difference between what's going on in our brains.
KotenochekFemaleRussia2009-05-10 21:39:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussian Military Certificate--please help!
A quick update, in case this information may be useful to future VJers!
I finally got a reply to my e-mail from the consulate in Moscow about the military certificate. They said that since my husband is a Muscovite (never lived anywhere else his whole life) and served in Moscow, he does not need the military certificate (what a relief!). It seems to me (although they didn't specifically say this) that if you had served somewhere else in Russia, i.e. not in your home city, instead of getting a police certificate for the time you lived (served) in that city, you could INSTEAD of that get an army certificate stating that you weren't convicted of anything while you served in the army. This also makes sense if you carefully read the instructions pertaining to this certificate, which say "should" ("mozhet" in Russian) instead of "must" obtain. So since my husband had been in Moscow all along, his police certificate will suffice.
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-04 07:42:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussian Military Certificate--please help!
QUOTE (eekee @ Jan 31 2009, 06:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Were the instructions for all countries or just Russia? I would call the embassy, because perhaps his ??????? ????? and the stamp in his internal passport will be enough to prove he served.


These are instructions specifially from the U.S. Embassy in Moscow. We actually just talked to a (male) friend who recently went throught the same process, and he said he just got a document from his local ????????? stating that he served in the army, and when. It didn't say anything about convictions on it, but they accepted it at his interview. We should be able to get a similar document, I think. I also e-mailed the consulate here in Moscow to ask if this certificate is really necessary, but I am still waiting for an answer.
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-01 05:41:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussian Military Certificate--please help!
Hello! We are currently preparing for my husband's interview for a IR-1/CR-1 visa at the consulate in Moscow. We have already obtained the police certificate, and now we are trying to figure out how to get the military certificate we need (since my husband served in the military).
This is the requirement "If the applicant was on military service, he/she should bring the certificate from the local draft board."
In the Russian version this document is called "??????? ?? ?????????? ????????? ?? ???????? ???????????? ?? ????? ??????????"

Has anyone obtained one of these before? If so, how? Yesteraday my husband called his local draft board, where he was told that he should come today and just bring his '??????? ?????' with him. So he did that, but when he got there, they told him he also needed to bring some documents proving his employment, plus some sort of special form that they need in order to issue his document. He asked them where to obtain this form and what is was, and nobody would tell him. So later today he called the office again, asking what he needed to bring, and (not so surprising for Russia) the person on the phone said they do not and WILL NOT issue him any such certificate. (by the way, his local draft board is ?????????? ?????)

So what to do now? He plans to call back again and hope that someone else will answer the phone....Everything was going so smoothly up till this point! Now we are at a loss.

How have others obtained this military certificate? Do they ask for it at the interview?

If I don't get any answers here and we can't work something out with the draft board I guess I will e-mail the U.S. embassy and ask them.

Any help will be appreciated!

Alexandra
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-01-28 07:16:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusInterview: Success!!!
Congrats!!!
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-01-30 06:58:00
Russia, Ukraine and Belaruswould you live in your fiancee's country?
I wouldn't anymore. I am currently living in Moscow, but we will be moving to the States in the summer. I really do love the city, but I can't see myself living here permanently. In the beginning it was really fun and "oh, it's so cool how they do this differently!" but after a while that wears off, and you get tired of the impossible bureaucracy (see my post about the military certificate), salespeople who yell at you, the fact that half the time I go to the grocery store they're out of whatever I want to buy, and of course, the high prices--not only high prices, but because this city caters to the rich, you always feel like you're poor. The only way I would agree to live here is if I had tons of money. Then you could have a pretty good life. Also, I wouldn't want to raise my kids here. For a number of reasons. That said, I really do love Moscow, it's an exciting and happening place. We will definitely be coming back to visit, but not to live(and lucky for me, hubby would also rather live in the States!).

P.S. I speak fluent Russian and know a lot about the culture, so this has nothing to do with that. It's all about personal preferences.
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-04 14:04:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusLack of proof of childhood vaccinations
Very interesting. Unfortunately, we're out of time, as the medical's the day after tomorrow. But good for future filers!

FYI, for those of you who would prefer to do titers (if you don't have your records), they DO do them here, at least at the Meditsina clinic, but it takes a while to get the results. I don't know how long, but more time than we have. If you get started a month prior to the interview though, you should be able to do it.
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-10 13:36:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusLack of proof of childhood vaccinations
[/quote]

I know that some people in this forum with the same issue have gone to local schools and had them sign some kind of paper authorizing that they have gotten the shots, because obviously everyone who went to school in the Soviet Union got the same shots.
[/quote]

Interesting. Probably to do that, I'm guessing you should know someone at the school? I can just imagine what the response would be if you walked into some random school (or even your school that you attended years ago) and ask them to give you a document stating which shots you got. If we had lots of time on our hands and were extremely patient we might even try it. But after hearing that neither his own clinic nor a private clinic would provide him with anything, well, that just made us give up. I still think the situation is ridiculous, but what can you do? It's not worth going through the hassle.

Do you think there is any danger in getting the vaccinations again? I know that not all doctors are that keen to give you shots for no reason (and getting a second round because your medical info. was lost is pretty close to no reason).
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-09 01:18:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusLack of proof of childhood vaccinations
Today we called a private clinic (i.e. one that is not assigned to you based on where you live and where you pay them for their services), explained our situation, and asked if they could do do either a titer or at least give him the vaccinations he needs all over again. Their answer? No! Of course not! You have to go to your local clinic! Unbelievable! What is the purpose of private clinics if not to do the same thing as local, government-sponsored clinics, but for money and with less of a hassle? They acted as though vaccinating someone is illegal if it is not that person's local clinic. So then how is it, I wonder, that the pre-approved clinics that work with the U.S. consulate have no problems administering them? Just another Russian mystery.... After wasting too many hours on this issue, we are just giving up and going to have my husband receive all the vaccinations again on the day of his medical exam. Even if they would give him the titer test there, I have read it can take up to 12 days to get the results, which is too long to wait, since his interview is in 12 days from today.

Anyway, thank you for your input (and the information on the titer), and for those of you who have lots of time before your interview and would prefer not to receive another dose of required vaccinations, plan ahead and see if you can manage to get something from your local clinic, or at least have them administer a titer. Good luck!

By the way, titer in Russian is just "????."
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-07 17:00:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusLack of proof of childhood vaccinations
QUOTE (payxibka @ Feb 6 2009, 11:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
unless the "titer" test is available... this test is designed to find certain anti-bodies and if present, re-vaccination is not needed


You wouldn't happen to know how to say that in Russian, would you?
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-06 11:35:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusLack of proof of childhood vaccinations
How did all of you deal with the vaccination part of the medical exam? My husband doesn't have proof of his childhood vaccinations, although of course he had them (it was mandatory in the Soviet Union). Yesterday he went to his local clinic to see if they could find his records or at least give him some kind of note stating that he has had them all. They told him to come back today. So today he went there, spent about 3 hours in line, then was told to go to another line, the person there said he needed to go to the first line again, first line person said the person who makes those decisions is gone, doesn't know when she'll go back. The short of it is that they said they will not give my husband any such document! He had even made up a document listing the types of vaccinations and years so that they could just sign it, but they refused. I know that he can just have them all re-done at the same time he goes for his exam, but, besides it costing us more, I think it is ridiculous he has to get all his childhood vaccinations again just because his clinic says they don't have his records and won't give him a document saying he has had them.
Dealing with them was a disaster, hubby was so mad when he got back! I guess the only thing to do now is for him to get all the vaccinations again, right?
Has anyone else gone through this? Were you successful in obtaining anything from the local clinic?
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-06 10:57:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusI-864 on assets alone?
QUOTE (slim @ Feb 11 2009, 02:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I have no experience with the I-864 so I don't know what they're specifically looking for but I do know the main thing they're really trying to determine is if you're going to have enough to support yourself and your beneficiary.

Obviously, as a student, you're not going to be doing it alone. As long as your dad has the assets he says he has, and can prove he has them (through statements, etc.) then you should be OK.



Thanks, Slim, for answering! I've been worrying a lot about this lately, but I think it will be okay. They are looking for employability and if they think that person is able to keep the immigrant off welfare. With my dad's record, plus assets, I think we'll be okay. Also, he might be getting a new job as early as next week...

Now I just have to worry about whether my husband's finger will heal (!) in time for the interview. We got a piece of paper from the embassy that says you have to reschedule if you have any bruises or cuts on any of your fingers. That will be a good story to tell when people start asking me how the interview went and I say it didn't yet because he hurt his finger smile.gif
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-12 15:43:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusI-864 on assets alone?
Has anyone tried to use only assets to meet the requirements for the I-864 in Moscow?
I am a student and therefore my only income is through student loans. My dad is the joint sponsor. The problem is that he was just laid off (in January). Before that, his salary was much more than what was required for the I-864 (about 4 times more). So we decided to use assets (5X 125% of what is required). The assets include 401k, stock, and his investment portfolio. All of them can be converted to cash in less than a year. He is still receiving severance from his previous job, as well as actively searching for a new one. His tax returns for the last three years show a high, stable income.
Also, he used my mom's income as a household member. She does not make enough to meet the requirement, but at least this will show that she currently has a job.
So we have included proof of all assets, the last three pay stubs from his job, severance pay stubs, my mom's information, and an explanatory note explaining that he is using assets since he just lost his job due to the economic crisis.
It seems that, in theory, we have met the criteria for the I-864, but I understand that using only assets is tricky and doesn't always work.
How good/bad are our chances? This was quite unfortunate and came as a shock for all of us. Of course it would be best to find another sponsor, but so far I haven't been able to.

Any thoughts?

sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-10 13:39:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusRussian titles for movies
What I usually do is go to yandex.ru, the Russian search engine, and type in the name of the movie in English. Usually that automatically brings up something with the movie's name in Russian. It will have most information in Russian but then somewhere it will have the actual title listed. I think that the websites of movie theaters often do that as well--not just for English, but somewhere in their information they'll have the name of the movie in its original language. If you're trying to find out the English name of a movie whose title you know in Russian, that could be a little harder. But you could try to do the same thing. That is, type in the Russian title of the movie, and then the word "movie" or something, in English. A search engine like Google might work better in this case.
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-18 01:28:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusAfter all this, now we have to reschedule...
Rescheduled! And we got the exact date and time we asked for---March 6th at 8 AM! Now the waiting begins again!
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-19 07:07:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusAfter all this, now we have to reschedule...
QUOTE (slim @ Feb 18 2009, 12:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The reschedule is pretty painless. And, it's actually pretty quick. Your husbands finger will probably take more time to heal than when they could reschedule you. I busted up my finger 10 weeks ago and it's still not 100%. The skin has healed (well, it's ugly, but it's there!) but it's still kind of tender.

I had finger surgery many years ago and the fingerprint will come back pretty quick. He'll have to take it easy when doing the prints though. They like to grip that finger and roll it across the machine. OUCH!

Good luck!


Sounds painful! The most annoying thing is that his finger has almost healed---but we don't want to risk it, even if it's 80% healed already. It's okay--as you said, Mox, we've waited this long, what's another month? They should have a special number you can call just for rescheduling. I have always done everything in my power to avoid using the call center number(and have thus far been successul). But they can be a little slow answering e-mails at the consulate, sometimes it takes them a week. I thought I would have to call them Thursday afternoon if they still hadn't gotten back to me. Thankfully, I talked to someone today who knows someone who works there and she said they'll make sure to reschedule us tomorrow. So I won't have to talk to a robot after all. What a relief!

As a side note, why do they need prints of all ten of your fingers? Just in case, after committing a crime, you happen to only leave one single fingerprint behind?
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-18 13:00:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusAfter all this, now we have to reschedule...
...because my husband's finger hasn't finished healing properly. And of course they need clear prints from all ten fingers. I can't believe that after going through everything, finishing the paperwork, medical, obtaining all certificates, etc., etc., now this happens! I know that we may have to wait a while now for another interview. Has anyone else recently rescheduled? How long did you have to wait?
Also, I sent an e-mail to the consulate last night asking them to reschedule. Sometimes they take a few days to go through their e-mails. I guess if I don't hear back from them by Thursday I have to call the expensive $10-minimum-a-call call center, right?
Fortunately, we're not planning to move until summer, so that's not a problem. But when you've been waiting for a date for so long, it's a bummer when things like this happen!

To everyone out there still waiting for your interview: please take extra special care of your fingers before the interview, and don't open up any laundry drying stands on your own! Get someone else to do it for you! smile.gif
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-18 01:42:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?
It's great to hear others' stories. Thank you for sharing. Everyone has good suggestions, and it's nice to know we're not the only ones going through this.
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-05 15:25:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?
[/quote]

Go wait for him at a bar or restaraunt, have him approach you, and then tell him, "I don't speak Russian. I speak Engish." Then have him kick his best English lines to you. If he doesn't do so well, no dessert for him!
[/quote]


yes.gif
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-04 13:53:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?
QUOTE (mox @ Feb 3 2009, 02:32 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (slim @ Feb 2 2009, 11:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (mox @ Feb 2 2009, 02:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Sticky notes, videos, and the like will help, but speaking--constant speaking--is where it's really at.


Save that for when you get here. While still in Russia it's not going to do much good because everything around you is still Russian. I will agree in that you should do as much as possible, but you're still in a Russian world so still be Russian. Once you transition to the States, then hit him with the English only.

Yeah, I said this in my first post ("when he gets here") but should have reiterated in my second post. As slim says, it's useless to try it in Russia. He has too many ways out, and when his head hurts he can just walk outside and speak Russian to anyone. The true "boot camp" begins when you get stateside. He will literally be a captive audience, and it will be up to you to be rigid about speaking English only, even when you feel sorry for him. The more disciplined you are about it, the faster he will learn.



Agreed. I know that it would be impossible here in Russia. However, I still make an effort to speak to him in English some of the time. Once we get to the States, I am not sure that I will be able to speak only English with him 100% of the time(we will have to have some conversations where I need to be sure he understands everything), but at least most of the time. Full immersion is definitely the way to go, provided you are in the right environment (i.e. the U.S. in our case).
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-03 11:56:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?
QUOTE (slim @ Feb 2 2009, 11:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You have plenty of time so start small. Keep in mind when transitioning to English, it's not so imperative that he learn grammar and a lot of rules. Start with basic vocab words of things around the house and basic verbs. (Point and grunt transitioning to "Juice" and "I want.")

I had about 1,000 yellow sitickies (3M Post It notes) on almost everything in our house with a Russian word on them and then the English translation. It's hard to not notice when you sit down on a chair and the sticky says "????/chair" on it. Couple that with a sign on the wall next to your table and chairs with a few related sayings or verbs. "To sit. To eat. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, I'm hungry, etc." I ordered a few children's books with big pictures and words (My first 1,000 words in Russian, Russian street scenes, etc.) from Amazon and then made the signs based on what I saw inside the books. You should be able to do it without books being that you speak Russian already, however, your husband may benefit from seeing the pictures.

Knowing 100% spelling and grammar rules, etc. isn't so important when first learning the language. However, it will be important later so make sure he knows the ABCs and has a general idea about spelling. I will say oral communication is 1,000 times more important than written but he will eventually need to transition so it is important that he at least be able to read English. Writing will come once he learns reading.

Lastly, keep in mind men are puppies. He needs to be given a treat when he does good. Reward him when he makes progress and he'll always want to play!


Going out to buy post-its tomorrow! That is really a great idea! You're right about oral communication being more important at this point. Fortunately, he already knows the alphabet and can read English. Spelling is a bit of a problem (as it is even for some native speakers of English) but I'm sure that will come in time.

I will also keep in mind what you said about puppies and rewards (my husband agrees with you, by the way)smile.gif
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-02 13:03:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?
QUOTE (K1researcher @ Feb 2 2009, 08:42 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
good methods that I have found for learning languages and used with success in practice:

1. Get movies in the target language and watch them with CC subtitles (same language) this aids in reading and listening comprehension
2. Find enjoyable music in target language. This trains the ear to understand the sounds with different inflections
3. Childrens books and TV shows! pickup some kids books and Sesame Street. Disney movies are excellent as well for enlgish
4. Praise! be sure to let him know he is doing well. you must be VERY patient. Unless he is a linguist he will find the process tedious and painful
5. Speak to him in WELL pronounce full spoken words. Do not speak casual at first. Be sure to speak correct enlgish. As he begins to understand you better move closer to your normal speech speed and "mumbling"
6. practice practice practice

Having taught language to students before i find that these tips help a great deal The more excited the student can get about the language the better. That said since my fiancee already speak english we are planning on setting up alternating speaking days so i can get my russian to be native sounding :-)


Excellent tips! Thank you! Will definitely try some of those. I especially liked the Disney idea. I thought of Sesame Street too, but don't think I would be able to find it in Russia. I do have some children's books though. Also, as you said, being patient is very important (and very hard!).

sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-02 09:16:00
Russia, Ukraine and BelarusHow hard was it for your spouse to learn English? How did you help?
QUOTE (mox @ Feb 2 2009, 12:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You're going to have to practice some tough love here. ONLY speak English to him when he gets here. You'll of course have to give him a pass occasionally when he really needs to understand, but otherwise stick to it. He's an adult, he'll know this is the way it has to be, so it shouldn't impact your relationship negatively. You'll feel bad about it while he's struggling, but it really is the best way.



Thanks, guys! Yes, I guess the best way really is to speak more English in him. We both know how important this is. And especially once we arrive in the U.S. we will be speaking much more English at home.

In the meantime I found some good DVDs for learning English where they speak slowly and you can also read English subtitles.

Does anyone else have any stories of personal experiences they would care to share?
sashitaskiFemaleRussia2009-02-02 04:19:00