Forum	Title	Content	Member	Sex	Country	Date/Time
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	ladyc, how lil (big) man do last night? The same like he does every night girl. We put him to bed and he started to bawl as usual but we ignored him. When that did not work he kept coming out to go to the bathroom. G put him back to bed and then he started turning the lights on and off. I was trying to help G fill out all his employment papers so when I got up and told him to stop he kept up the bawling. We finally went to our room and I have no idea when he stop bawl. SMH	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 11:27:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Congrats LadyC on your husbands new job. Thanks Bajan not a ting mi deya a easy! been around just not here! hehe..how yuh bambinas doing and hubby of course and that big man of urs LadyC congrats to hubby on new job cause dem no easy fi get these days Thanks Chiney	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 11:16:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	YAY!! That is excellent how is the new van working out? The van is great....How is baby doing? Is your morning sickness slowing down yet?	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 11:15:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Oh I forgot to say that My hubby started his job today....	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 10:36:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Tam..PLUS..just like adults have to adjust our children have to also!! Its no secret Kashi has 3 other kids..and there is never a thought of them not living or spending alot of time with ALL of us at some point...My bilogical kids NEED to know their sisters I send my kids to visit with her sisters and Kashi's ex LOVES my kids as I do hers..I think when the wife and child's mother develop a decent relationship things are better IMO. I love Jaheim as if he is my own and I have an ok relationship with his mom. We have never had any issues. She admits that she did not help with his behavior and when ever he acted up she did not punish him some times she spank but most times she would tell him to leave her alone and go play or do what ever it is he wanted to do (her words not mine). When he is screaming sometimes we call her and she said this is how he behave with her but when she get tired of the screaming she give in to him.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 10:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	LadyC, I don't think that JaE was trying to be disrespectful at all. I imagine she's just passionate (as are many) about this topic. I laud you for raising your kids to be good kids, because many can't/don't. I just want to strongly encourage you and your husband to seek some outside professional assistance from a therapist or counselor. Finding someone who specializes in behavior modification techniques would be good. If you could find someone who specializes in working with immigrant families would be even better, but I'm not sure what's available in your area/with your insurance. I just don't want you to give up so soon. Although it sounds like he might be a true terror. Remember this is a lifetime of behaviors he has learned--and while you say, "he's only 7", 7 years of learned behaviors that are detrimental and dangerous is 7 years too many. If you're willing, it's gonna take months of work to work out. This wsan't something that he learned overnight. That's just the truth of the matter. And that's if you AND your husband are putting 200% of your efforts into working on it TOGETHER! If not, then it's gonna take much longer than that, with less successful results. We are all really here for you. Even if we're not around much. Hope things work out. Thanks Mrs Palmer I understand what you are saying but I dont not need to be attacked for my venting. Yes I know that my VJ sisters are here for me but If and when I vent that does not give anyone the right to attacke me and that is how her post came across to me. I am a mother first and foremost so I know how to parent with love. I know this wont be easy but I am willing to try. Ok some peole might not like what I said about sending him back but thats how I felt at that moment. Would I put him on a plane today and send him back no. Do I expect over night change no. But it does get frustrating when he screams at the top of his lungs for no reason until after midnight. I live in an apt complex and mi nah want no police come knock pon mi door. Again Thanks for your advise. Goodmorning yardies, I've been reading from my phone and I see I havre alot to reply to. In the meantime I am happy to say NO TUMOR!!! Yea KJ	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 10:05:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Awww shoot I forgot to say good morning to everyone...Morning Yardies	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 09:46:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Hell, this is going to upset enough people anyway, let me just say the rest as well. Lady C, when you married your husband, you accepted him AND his child. So it PAINS me that LESS than a MONTH after the boy gets here, you're talking about shipping him home because he doesn't fit in with your expectations of behaviour?????????????? If as you say, this behaviour started and was accepted in Jamaica, what did you think was going to happen when he came here? And if you didn't know about it, do you think it'll take a WEEK or even a MONTH to change? Let me ask you, let's say YOUR children had the behaviour problem, (yes I know they are well-behaved rae, rae), and your HUSBAND decided he couldn't deal with it, would you ship your kids off to your ex?? Yes I know he probably supports you, rae rae....But this is a CHILD we are talking about, your HUSBAND's CHILSD. Who he LOVES. Why would you send him back to a home that has failed him in your words? Because you signed up for better but not for this worse? Philly's kids in her own words have been a HANDFUL, do you see her husband walking away? Hell no, he STAYED and DEALT with it as a TEAM. Damn, the kid is SEVEN years old, take the reins and do what you need to, support your husband and help him deal with his son, because he is YOURRRRRRRR joint responsibility now! ALl I can say is the more I read this board the more I am appreciative of what I have, and NO life isn't no bed of roses round here. But when my son threw my husband's advances back in his face, my husband never told me to send him away. And when my son acted the hell up, my husband dealt with it. And when my son came back from his dad's with a whole new set of retorts, he dealt with it. And still deals with it. Ok JaEnglish I dont know who or what rubbed you the wrong way but in no way that has anything to do with me or anyone else who voice their opinions on this board. You do not have to like what is said but you do have to respect people for saying whats on their minds. First off we only know each other from this board so no one has any right to judge any one. I did marry my husband and I also married his child just like he married mines. I thought my children manners and I also thought my children how to treat people. So if my kids got out of pocket with any one I would put a stop to it. I have raised 3 children and I did a great job as a single mother. So this is why I know how kids should behave. I also have a right to try and help my step son and if its not working I also have a right to send him back to his mom. Thats between me and my husband. I have talked to my husband about this before and after my step son came. You do not live in my home and I only voiced a few of his actions on here so you have no right to attack me for what I have to say. Yes its only been a week that should let you know just how bad it is. If you want to give advise then give it but by no means do you have to be nasty in giving it. Dont yell at me in your answer. I read things on here that I dont like and if I dont like it I dont comment. I do not rule my husband and my husband do not rule me but when it comes to his son we discuss everything. So any decision that is made for him will be by both of us. Thanks	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 09:33:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Thanks for the love ladies!!!! I'm home and feeling aight y'all are right, it wasn't that bAd... I do remember the first thing I asked while I was in the recovery room was "when can I eat?" only me, only me LMAO THANK GOD FOR CODINE (sp) Justucia im so glad everything worked out safe for you. Please take it easy and relax. ((hugs))	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-11 08:32:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Ok ladies im out. Chat wid uno lata	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 15:53:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Lady C, your mama brought it to you straight up didn't she? Dang, she knocked you out cold. Girl I needed that laugh for my commute to the house. I'm just getting the image in my head of your sister pouring that water over you to bring you back... Dens my mama is no joke. I hit the radiator so hard I was knocked the F > U > C > K out	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 15:29:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Girl no, I live in ATL. I'm not trying to have my husband having all "Hard Legs" as friends...no, no, no. Dens You are crazy	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 15:26:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	It sometimes makes me wonder why people are suprised that the babymothers don't want to send their kids to the States. Why??? I would NEVER send my child to the States to live with their father unless they are suffering. And the other thing that cracks me up is how EVERY babymother is an unfit mother.....My two cents! Well I cant speak for everyone but who feels it knows it. We all have diffrent stories to tell. I do not have Baby Mama drama so I cant speak about that but I can say that my step son mother did not do a great job in the discipline area. She herself admits to the role she played in his behavior. He was allowed to behave badly with not much discipline. As for sending your child away I would not do it at a young age but if its for my childrens benefit I would do it. Better education, being with their dad etc. To each his/her own	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 15:24:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Hello Ladies I'm new to this tread, so I'm just going to see how it goes. What's up with everyone and there step-kids, My husband baby mama is RUDE and will not let my husband bring his daughter. Oh well!!! Hi BlessMe..Welcome to the board and good luck on your journey. Girl if I knew the answer to your question I would tell you. But this ride is not easy it come with lots of ups and downs.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 14:52:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Afternoon Yardies! How is everyone? I've seen a few things on FB but other than that, need to catch up & I know it won't happen since I can't read back so far. Hope everyone had a nice Mother's Day weekend. I miss my Ma...she had to work yesterday & I had wanted to see her. Hope some of you got to see your Moms or that you got special Mom treatment yesterday. Hey Ells how are you and the hubby doing. My mom live in Nashville, TN so I did not get to see her either. I see, We applied for the CR1 and I am doing the waiting game... Really I do understand your concerns regarding your stepson, It is a difficult sitiuations for EVERYONE involved. As JG has stated the child is in a new environment and I am sure totally out of his element. So we have to realize that this MAYBE his cry for attention in order to feel secure. But I am with you, the problem requires a Solution because this reckless behavior will not help him here in the US. I though that with my stepson I would work on this now but my stepsons mother has stated that she doesn't want him to come up to the US now and I cool with that maybe she can get some control over her son. As for you and your stepson TRY to keep it positive and remember that he is a little boy trying to find his way and let's keep the prayers going up for the kids.... Thanks for your feed back Dan-Dan	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 14:36:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Lady C I know we will need the prayers so I am on bended knee for us too... I wondered if the mother put the child up to this? She was a bit upset that the child likes me (are so I thought ). I know what you mean about the schools, I was telling my family that I am not sure how my stepson will do in the American School System. The schools are not having this AT ALL they will label you with the quickness. So did it take a long time to get him over to the states and what are the stipulations on his coming? Dan-Dan I applied for the K2 at the same time I did the K1 for my hubby so they were both approved at the same time. But we waited until now to bring him up.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 13:28:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	C, I'm not saying those aren't serious issues. They most certainly are. And, yes, I see that his upbringing is going to cause you a lot of hardship in the near future till it gets under some sort of control. I'm just saying, it's not going to be an instant change. It's going to take lots of time. I do hope he has not overheard you say you would send him back if he didn't behave. JG I dont expect instant change but I do expect some change. Every day gets worse and worse. No I did not tell him about sending him back but I did talk to his dad about it.Thank you for your input it helps Edited by LadyC, 10 May 2010 - 01:27 PM.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 13:26:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Then you can't possibly think just cause it was your household, he was going to change his behavior overnight then. This is going to take lots of time, C. I wish you luck. JG its not just adjustment. I know adjustment takes time this kid has no form of behavior. He was allowed to get away with his mess so now that he see he wont be able to he is acting up more. He is used to people saying ok go do what you want, go to bed when you want, dont do your school work etc. He was spoiled rotten and now he see he wont be continued to be spoiled.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 13:13:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	LOL, This sounds like my experience with my stepson, when I visited last month he stayed with his father and I for a few days. This little boy was SOOO unruly and rude that I was glad to come back to the USA! We where cooking dinner and he wanted to eat snacks so I said that he should wait a few mins until I could prepare him a plate. He was not having it. He went to the freezer and got out the ice cream bar and his father told him to but it back. So my hubby went to the store and the little terror let me have it.. He began to scream and shout for all of 20 mins. then I packed him up the stairs to the bedroom and did the stone cold fool he started to spit in the bed and took ALL of the linens off the bed when he saw that I wasn't having it he started in on me, he tried to hit me, kick me, bite me and the all time worst spit on me. #######??? His father arrived back but the boy could not see him so I told my hubby to walk up and look at what he was doing this 4yr old was throwing my clothes out of my bag. That was It!!! I was time for one of us to get a break, So after dinner we took him back to his mother. On the car ride home he ask "Do mi have to go down by mi mothers yard? I replied, YES SIR You do!!! My hubby said that when he goes to visit him on Friday the boy always ask is he coming back to Runaway Bay by my yard... He doesn't know that his father leased the place together but I am in the States THANK GOD... OMG Dan-Dan ah di same rasscloth thing mi ah deal with. I remember back in the days West Indian parents used to be so strict but not any more. These kids dont have no mammers and respect. Girl Im praying for us.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 13:04:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	yeah, he is definitely testing you. that behavior is of a 3 year old having a tantrum...not a seven year old. prolly worked on him momma so he's gonna try it on you. does he want to be living with you? I would say no because he cant get over on me	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 12:39:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	damn, he sounds like a little devil....wonder what he is capable of when he dont get his way better to err on the side of caution than to underestimate him Finesse yesterday he woke up early so his dad told him to go back to his room and watch the TV because everyone was still in bed. When I got up I saw him in the living room trying to wake my daughter up so I told him to go back to his room and watch the TV. My daughter had left the TV in the living room on so I turned it off and went back to my room. As soon as I closed my bed room door he started screaming at the top of his lungs I WANT TO WATCH THE TV. He did this for over 20 minutes. G got up to go to his room and I told him to stay in bed and not to answer him. Finally I got up to use the bathroom and this little boy was standing in the bathroom peeing no tear at all screaming I WANT TO WATCH THE TV. So since the TV in his room was on and he still screamed down the place I unplug the TV and told him no TV for the day. Now tell me if his behind don’t know what he is doing.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 12:21:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	money saving tip NOT to try: I bought "chocolate sandwich cookies" instead of oreos.............and these phockers taste like #######!! Thanks for the heads up Finesse	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 12:07:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Remember it's new and scary and he's in survival mode at the moment. Give him some time to get used to things. The education, you can work that out iwith your local school district. No JG he was the same in JA too. Even his mother said this is how he acts with her but she usually gives in and let him do waht he wants. This boy is grown and he knows what he is doing but I dont give in and Im not scared of him like his mother is. When you give in to him he smiles at you like "Yea I knew you would". That wont fly with me.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 12:05:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Way to go My2 I slammed the door on my mom when I was 15 and all I remember was her kicking the door off My mama did a kong foo kick and the door flew off. She than grabed me and threw me into the wall when I woke up my sister was pooring water over me. I never did that shyt again	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 10:46:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	It is possbility that he feels overwhelmed about leaving Jamaica and feels like an outsider (even though you are the girls have bent over back trying to welcome him!). He might also be pushing the boundaries to see whether you're in it for the long haul. Of course this behaviour cannot be tolerated, perhaps talking to him about his feelings might help. I know my son has done similar with my in-laws, for pretty much the same reason. JaEnglish we have tried everything so far	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 09:37:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	what was the story before he came here? did he just live with his mom and she let him run around and do whatever? i thought only these american kids were rude and disrespectful... Girl he lived with his mother and grand parents. They just did not teach him nothing	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 09:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Wow it’s that bad??? Did he want to come or his dad made him come because it was best? No DaDa he is 7 and I dont think he really understood. No one made him come.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 09:01:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	my son is in his room getting ready for school belting out that rihanna song what i want want want is watcha want want...take it take it baby baby love it love it... or whatver the words are. i dont even think he know the right words,,,just singing any ole words...its funny...he sounds serious too, like he really sound good Too Funny	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 08:44:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Good Morning Yardies.... Bajan Welcome to the board JQ Glad everyone Loveed the surprise My mothers day was good and bad my family took me to breakfast at I-Hop and then they gave me my gifts. I got Coach Sneakers & Juicy Couture Bracelet from my kids and my Hubby gave me the dress I wanted from Zara's. I love my family. The bad part was I had to walk out on them and go by my friend for a drink because I was gonna snap on my husband. I put Jaheim on punishment and he decided to take him off of punishment. Well that shyt was not cool with me so I left and when I came back we had a long talk. The way my step son behave I have only seen on Nanny 911. This pickney is a mess. He is not used to bed time so he HOLLA until he falls asleep. Friday night I had to woop his butt because he was kicking and punching the walls and screaming at the top of his lungs. Sorry to say my hubby is a punk when it comes to dealing with his son. Last nigt was another repeat of screaming 7 people in Jamaica tried to calm him down because he would not stop. This was after 11 at night. He loves the streets so when he is out he is happy and he loves to be in grown folks business but because I do not allow him to rule no one he clings to his dad and his dad lets him do what ever he wants. I was so pissed I cussed G out and told him if he cant be on the same page with me Jaheim will have to go back to his mother.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-10 08:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL MY VJ SISTERS>>>>>> Congrats Suga	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-09 16:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Ok Ladies time to roll out...mi chat to uno lata......	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:58:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Mi sista you gotta make it happen ((((((((hugs)))))) @ Lady C... likkle more see it deh....ah dat mi a seh.....Likkle more Tee	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:42:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Girl, I know. I have indeed been there and it took a lot out of me. But I had to keep in mind that he was dealing with a lot of issues not just the schooling. He also had to adjust to me and not being with his mom, him realizing his dad was with me and was not going to be with his mom, the fact he was not our only child, and on and on and on to add to the fact that he was behind and he knew daddy would take up for him. Believe it or not your daughters are more on track because a firm no nonsense way worked with me (the same way I was with my girls, but more understanding of his situation…loving but still no nonsense). I had to let him know that my house was going to be ran the way I said and I had to get his dad to understand my side and to back me up when I said something. We would discuss things later away from the kids if dad decided he disagreed with the way I handle dealt with him. Thank J2A this is how I am and will continue to deal with this situation. Me and hubby had a very long talk last night and I told him he has to step up and stop babying him and be on the same page with me because I am not in this alone and I am doing this for his son's bbenefit.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:40:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	send him back! just kidding... it is a huge adjustment for everyone, especially him....luckily kids his age are much more easily adaptable than older kids. since hubby is the only one he listens to then he's gonna have to step up and get on the same page with you in order for it to work. hubby can make excuses and ignore all he wnats, the problem wont go away...the sooner you make a plan and lay down the rules and stick together, the better for all of you Finesse I have benn humming "Return to Sender" in my head all damn day...But im not ready to give up just yet but its gonna be a hard road to travel.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:28:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	My comment wasnt for you, it was in response to what Just said. Im good though. No harm done nor taken. I think I had a frustrating week last week. I was looking at some of my responses on the board. I really just spoke out when I shouldve kept somethings in.. Im good though. I have to give my hubby his props though. When I think about what other marriages may be going through, Im truly blessed to have him. Love you Steve Hey Tee whats up girl...TGIF sis TGIF	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:21:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Awwwww CONGRATS JQ!!!!! LadyC – sorry the first few moments of adjustment are getting off so rough. It’s tough being in your situation, I was there once. I hope he learns soon how much you love and care for him and allows you to help him come up to speed. J2A I hope it gets better soon cause this is too much. My kids are looking at me like if we tried this shyt you would have clocked us. My girls are really friendly and like to help but they say they cant deal with him.	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:15:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Hi Lady C! I believe others have had similar issues with their stepkids being so behind in education.....dillon, 1luv maybe??? they might be able to help. why is he at your friends and not in school? Finesse its too late to put him in school. The school is in the process of doing Final Exams so it dont make any sence to start him until next term. Im getting him a tutor but his behavior is so bad I have to wait a few weeks for him to get into my way of behaving	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 15:10:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Good Afternoon MrsT, Finesse, JQ and all my other Yardies...wahhhhh gwan? Well I have an update on my step-son first fews days. Im gonna need you all to pray for me because this will be very hard for me. This little boy is real out of pocket. He knows how to play people but him cant play me. When his daddy is around he acts like a baby and wont do what he is told with out his dad ok. Well that cant fly in my house. Any hooo he is so far behind in education its sad. At 7 he cannot count past 29 when he gets to 29 he jumps to 40 and then jumps around all the numbers. He cannot say his ABCs without help and he cant spell simple site words. I have to put him in sometype of program but if you even mention school work he starts to bawl dat him miss him madda. G is no help because he wants to cover up the fact that he needs help and his behavior is not that of a 7 year old. I could go on and on but my friend that watch him just called to complain about him and it just hit me. wha!???!!! mi knoa dem sexy parties a get yuh in trouble sooner or later! congrats ooman! watch.....a twins yuh go ave!! JQ ah Breed...LAWD im not drinking the VJ wata.....CONGRATS JQ	LadyC	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-07 14:46:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Morning, Dillon, KJ,1luv, Finesse,Heart_inJamaica. Hope y'all have a blessed day. Thanks TAMH. You do the same! Not posting much cuz I am hard at work and reading Mrstee's Subway letter. LOL	Heart_In_Jamaica	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-06 10:47:00
Mexico, Latin & South America	Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!	Good Morning Everyone!	Heart_In_Jamaica	Female	Jamaica	2010-05-06 09:10:00