ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
PhilippinesSo before you say "I Do"
Oh wow! How could I have missed posting the source! I am terribly sorry. It's an article that was just forwarded to me.

And Tallcoolone - Didn't you get any from last night? Why are you so cranky? I bet you are miserable you got nothing better to do. I pity your poor unhappy soul.
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-30 10:05:00
PhilippinesSo before you say "I Do"
So before you say "I Do", make sure you have at least considered these:

• Ability to Compromise: There are subtle changes that most people can make in their lives in order to make their spouse happy. This is part of the never ending compromise phase that is critical. When single, I'd watch football games at bars every Saturday and Sunday (and sometimes Thursday). Once married, I toned it down to one day. This is a manageable change that I was willing to make. However, had my wife insisted that I give up all sports entirely, I would have resisted and eventually resented her. That resent would have spread and ultimately influenced my overall attitude towards her. The same is true for just about everything. The willingness of the other person to compromise today (of the lack thereof) and your reaction to it will prove to be a precedent setting event. If someone is absolutely unwilling to compromise on minor issues, you should expect the same for larger issues. Don't be shocked and appalled by it when it happens three years from now- you knew this going in and you accepted it!

• Money - Yes, we all want it but once we have it who controls it. My wife started direct depositing her paychecks into my account after 3 months of dating. I actually don't recommend that so soon but she was bad with money and she admitted it. For us, it was a matter of getting our credit into shape (we had 640 credit and back then, now its 850 836) and we needed a strategy to pay off college and personal debt. Once that debt was paid off and we moved into our house, I turned the finances back over to her after a crash course in on time payments and credit. I never looked back. I enjoyed the strategy part of it but not the day-to-day grind of bill paying. She actually enjoyed it because as a stay at home Mom, it gave her the insight she needed to plan for grocery purchases, clothes for the kids, etc. So before you get hitched, what is your plan today and 5 years from now? Who is handling what?

• Who cleans the toilets? - Toilets and the remainder of the housework is a constant issue. It all needs to get done and it's not the most fun. Setup a plan for this in the beginning. My suggestion is a weekly rotation - perhaps you'll come up with something different. The point of this is to set the expectation on both sides so that someone doesn't feel like a housekeeper. Chores need to be shared regardless of the work and income situation. Being a woman doesn't mean the wife has to handle at all.

• The plan: In talking to people, it became pretty apparent that their initial goals were in line but after the kids are born and careers take off, there is a fork in the road. I agree that all plans change and there is no way to write a script for your marriage but a lot of the confusion can be removed by having a 1, 3, 6 and 9 year plan. You should have this conversation now and then revisit it all the time. This does not mean you only review goals at these intervals. These are simply due dates. I am often questioned as to why 1,3,6,9. o 1 Year Plan: This one is obvious. After the wedding, where will you live, where will you eventually live. Who handles what, what is the combined income, what can we afford etc. o At 3 years: You are no longer newlyweds and you are perhaps considering kids. Heck, you may already have a kid at this point. You need a plan for that, a plan for who works, who stays home, what type of daycare, etc. This is also around the time that your first condo or "couple's house" loses it appeal. What kind of house do we want? Where? Can we afford that? How are the schools? What is Plan B if someone gets fired? Do we know what utilities cost? o 6 years: We have all heard of the 7 year itch. Therefore, it stands to reason that you have a plan set with a deadline of 6 years. Where do you want the marriage to be in 6 years? Communication habits, sex life, careers...everything. Talk about it now and periodically consider making adjustments based on the the success of your approach. Plans are meant to be changed. o 9 years: Again, where do you want to the marriage to be in 9 years? Why? What will life be like? How many kids will we have by then? Are we sending them to public school? What if someone's parent dies?

• Holidays - Just discuss how and where you will celebrate holidays. This is a battle for nearly everyone I know.

• Discipline - Are we spanking the kids, are we talking and coaching or are we doing both? No matter how happy you are now, if you're against physical discipline and your spouse is not, you will slowly learn to resent and dislike him/her each time a spanking is doled out. Discuss it NOW and avoid a surprise.

• Ok, religion - How important is it and how will we teach the kids?

• Communications, cheating - I don't care how many conversations you have, no one will ever openly state that they "may cheat". A key here is to be undoubtedly sure that the precedent is set for open communication. If a wife is not happy, the FIRST action on her part should be to talk to the husband (and vice versa). The only way to do this consistently is to talk; not yell, not argue, but talk like civilized people. If you become enraged every time your spouse tries to talk to you, you are pushing away an opportunity to fix a problem. Take time out and actually LISTEN. Marriage is not an argument or a punishment unless you make it one.

There are clearly a lot of other things to consider. Bad choices are going to made regardless of how thorough you plan; that's life. You wouldn't go on a 1,500 mile road trip without putting some thought into it and your marriage should be thought of in the same way. By planning and talking, the aim is to minimize the possible obstacles by first identifying them and getting them out in the open before they reach a critical, war-type, level.


HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-29 13:58:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
M back - just to say hello and have a great week ahead of you.

Seriously, work mode muna ako at andito na uli si bossing, baka dagukan ako. smile.gif

*waving from Cebu*
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-12 21:05:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
teka lang... at ang fiance ko baka umusok ang tenga kakaantay sa tawag ko. Praying for all your visas!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-12 07:38:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
OMG... Kakaibang level na to! Nawala lang ako 1 day, waaahhhh... page 92 na??? *faints*
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-12 07:28:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
BRB people... Church muna ako. smile.gif Happy Sabbath everyone.
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 21:09:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Mariel - love your sense of humor... Tayo tayo ng parlor. Ikaw bugaw, este, marketing!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 20:45:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Mariel - Medyo high end ang brands na binibili ko kasi worth it din... Di na paulit2 ung application. Di gaya ng ibang brands na after mong mag touch up ng powder, wala na... Yung role ko naman complicated. I do "old people" makeup... Alam mo kasi yung professor namin sa theater medyo nagwawala pag di maayos from costume to makeup so it had to be perfected. Practice lang lagi. Gagaling ka din.
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 20:31:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
MJ - thanks a lot!

I actually just completed my certification for cosmetology at TESDA just for the heck of it so I can get a certification and license in my fiance's state, then I will go as freelance makeup artist and hairstylist in KY. Let me know and I would be more than willing to share what I know. smile.gif
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 20:24:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Thanks Mariel. Practice, practice, practice is the key.

I used to be in theater and performing arts too so alam ko na as early as 13 kung pano maglagay ng iba ibang style. Be it glamor, mime, horror or simply stage makeup. smile.gif hehehehehe

I guess I am just lucky... tongue.gif
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 20:10:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Wahahahah!!! Oh my gosh you sisters are going to get me started...

Skin care : Clinique 3 Step System for Combination Oily Skin... I know it's kinda high end but it lasts forever.. I mean yung sakin umaabot ng months. Do it twice a day. Always use, makeup remover too before cleansing para malinis talaga skin mo.
Clinique - All About Eyes Rich
Body Shop Body Butter
Elizabeth Arden body care system biggrin.gif

Makeup:
Clinique - Eyeshadow
Body Shop - eyeshadow and liquid eyeliner
MAC - foundation
Avon - lipstick
MaxFactor - Lipfinity
on and on and on...

The reason why I have several brands is because you cannot always get all the best shades from just one brand. I try to stick to browns and earth colors. Try to do away with metallic during daytime as that kinda makes your skin look shiny and oily. smile.gif I have bad oily skin so that's a no-no for me at daytime.

Yes, I do have YM. PM me so I can send it to you. smile.gif

HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 19:59:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Wahahaha! Sayang! Will post the wedding pics here for sure. smile.gif Makeup was one of the things I have loved doing ever since I was in high school.

QUOTE (felb @ Apr 10 2009, 06:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
waah. sa washington state ako. pano ko mareredeem yun? hehehe.

post your wedding pics here ha!


HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 18:02:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Sureness will share my trade secrets!!! FYI, I will do my own hair and makeup on my wedding. Hehehehehhe I am sooo excited!

Sang state ka ba? Bigyan kita ng free makeover when I get there. biggrin.gif
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 17:53:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Matsalams everyone! Oh it's your turn now!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 17:43:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Awwww... Thanks felb. That's a sample of the DIY makeup and hazel colored contact lenses. smile.gif *wink*

QUOTE (felb @ Apr 10 2009, 06:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (HappyDancer @ Apr 11 2009, 06:14 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Here's mine!


gosh. you look like a doll! i want eyes like those.



HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 17:29:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Here's mine!

Edited by HappyDancer, 10 April 2009 - 05:14 PM.

HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 17:14:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Banat... Simulan na!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 16:50:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
bawal nakabikini!!! biggrin.gif
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 15:40:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
PPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

Teka lang mga inday at mga dodong! One hap nalang kayong lahat ha!

Brek... Este BREAK!!!

Grabe ang haba... Nalingat lang ako!

Pictures with the partners naman... Wahahahah...

Ang gaganda ng mga sisters ko! Kahit semana santa, keri pa rin!


HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-10 14:11:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
lalalalalala... M loafing at work!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 13:11:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Sige... Ako magbibitbit nga walis sa picture!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 13:06:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Kardi - diko alam pano palakihan. Pero you can click on the pic, it will bring out a bigger pic.

RonMay - Thanks! pakapalan ng mukha? Ay di ako mahuhuli jan!

hehehhehehhe

Naman! I'm the hottest housemaid my fiance can ever have! Bwahahahahhah

Edited by HappyDancer, 09 April 2009 - 01:00 PM.

HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 13:02:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Ayan!!! Tada!!!

Kala niyo kayo lang marunong? HD at her best... Guts in, exhaling after the click. biggrin.gif
Wahahahhahahah!!! Kinaya ng powers ko!

Edited by HappyDancer, 09 April 2009 - 12:53 PM.

HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 12:52:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Wait lang ha... hanap muna ako
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 12:37:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Hala mga sisters... Mukha na akong tanga dito sa office ko... Yung mga staff ko tinitingnan na ako.. Manager nila naloloka na daw. biggrin.gif

Pa cute lang ako eh... Kasi dapat sa mukha lang kayo titingin... sa katawan... mapagkakamalang wrestler e. Di pang beauty pageant ang beauty. Pang street fighting.

Edited by HappyDancer, 09 April 2009 - 12:21 PM.

HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 12:20:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Oiii... Pinay ako... papilit!!!

tongue.gif
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 12:14:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Wow!!! Natulog lang ako tapos ganito na kahaba??? Wahahahahah!!! Lufet!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-09 12:11:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
She's very pretty!!!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 22:41:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
LOL He does look like he's lovin' it!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 14:53:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
QUOTE (sunandmoon @ Apr 8 2009, 01:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Kardi_Shian @ Apr 8 2009, 09:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Please post your best pics. We will vote which is the hottest and full of confidence!

Disqualification:

-no naked pics
-no bikinis
-no private parts showing


what's left to bare.. unsure.gif


Uh... the teeth?

HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 13:08:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
That pic needs waxing! LOL


HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 12:12:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Bring in the cape for the contenders!!!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 12:09:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Oooiii... Pinoy na pinoy... Nagpapapilit. biggrin.gif
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 12:00:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
I have the perfect finger... It does the perfect thing in the world. tongue.gif No pics for that... Bawal...
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 11:58:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Ayan... sige ang mauuna bongga!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 11:55:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Hmm... How about no private parts but the pics of our WAXED underarms! LOL That would be a good start! And someone would start yakking again. KWIM? Just for entertainment. hehehehe
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 11:46:00
PhilippinesDare to Bare?
Click attach on the bottom right part of the page when you post a reply. Make sure it does not exceed 1000k.
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-04-08 11:44:00
PhilippinesAge difference between Filipinas and americans (Poll)
I'm 27 and my fiance is 31.
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-01-21 06:03:00
PhilippinesWould it affect my fiancee's K1 VISA with a denied tourist VISA
These are two separate processes. Don't worry, just makle sure she doesn't deny it when the consul asks here if she's ever been denied a visa. It's her integrity that counts. Good luck!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-02-01 10:50:00
Philippines7 year anullment
Oopps... not true!
HappyDancerFemalePhilippines2009-02-05 17:53:00