Forum	Title	Content	Member	Sex	Country	Date/Time
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Case Filing and Progress Reports	March 2009 k-1 people	QUOTE (Richard-Joanna @ Oct 5 2009, 07:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (VSCvictim @ Oct 5 2009, 08:36 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Good Morning ! quick question. when should i start calling NVC to follow my docs? I called this morning they said 4 weeks after NOA2. When u found out if ur docs reached NVC ? Thanks !!!!! Some take only 3 or 4 days to get there, others like me, are still not there after 2 weeks. I call several times a day... to the best of my knowledge, they do not track your calls..... at least before they get your file... Missy did say that the NVC knows how many times she calls... so that must be after the file gets into the system. If you are not in the system, they can't log your calls into their system because they don't have your case number yet. Once they have your case number in their system, they make notes. If they are saying 4 weeks after NOA2, do they know that you are K1??	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-10-05 08:45:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Case Filing and Progress Reports	March 2009 k-1 people	QUOTE (Stephen + Elisha @ Oct 5 2009, 06:58 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hello from South Korea! I got here Friday evening and have been having a WONDERFUL time with Elisha and her family ever since. And... Elisha's interview is TOMORROW! Pray for us that all goes well and that we'll have the visa in hand in time for us to travel back together on the 10th! Hugs to all the March family—hope everyone gets moving along soon! I am so happy for you guys! The interview will be great and soon you will be on your way home to start your new life together! Take care and tell Elisha that we are all anxious to "meet" her and wish you all the best!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-10-05 08:42:00
K-1 Fiance(e) Visa Case Filing and Progress Reports	March 2009 k-1 people	Good morning March! All of you Stan Fans out there - I talked to Stan this weekend!! He and Amy are doing fine but the stress of the wait has been tough for them. They feel positive that the sputum test results will be good and they can continue on to an interview in November. I told him how much he's missed around here and he said to tell everyone hello!! Richard I hope you turn up at NVC today and I hope I get out! I have tried hanging out in the "Stuck at NVC" thread but guys, those people are DEPRESSING!! whispers ---> plus they are so sensitive, can't go over there and crack jokes like I can here. Kata, how are you and Freddy doing?	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-10-05 05:41:00
Canada	Should I stop the process?	QUOTE (July09Bride @ Apr 9 2009, 02:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Apr 9 2009, 03:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> You know, sometimes you read things that seem to be posted at exactly the right time. Last night we had an extremely hard time talking. The waiting, the emotions, I had reached the "throwing my hands in the air" point last night. I tossed and turned all night and then got up this morning and started reading here and discovered that we have all been through this, to some degree. It's normal. That makes me feel so much better. I don't even really belong in the Canadian forum but just happened to drop in and read the original post. So, thanks to all of you - I hope this helps the OP, but really, you guys have helped ME today. Thanks! I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason.... So glad we could help in some sort of way! If this is what is meant to be, you WILL make it through the rough times and everything will work out the way it is supposed to be! Best of luck to you! Thanks! We're going to be fine - it was just so great to read that I am not the only one feeling the roller coaster ride. I firmly believe that anything (or anyone) worth having, is worth the hard work.....thanks again. BTW - I love the Canadian forum, I'm a frequent "lurker."	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-04-09 14:34:00
Canada	Should I stop the process?	You know, sometimes you read things that seem to be posted at exactly the right time. Last night we had an extremely hard time talking. The waiting, the emotions, I had reached the "throwing my hands in the air" point last night. I tossed and turned all night and then got up this morning and started reading here and discovered that we have all been through this, to some degree. It's normal. That makes me feel so much better. I don't even really belong in the Canadian forum but just happened to drop in and read the original post. So, thanks to all of you - I hope this helps the OP, but really, you guys have helped ME today. Thanks!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-04-09 14:07:00
Canada	Contemplating Divorce	I'm not in the Canadian group but I too wish you the very best and hope things work out. I really, really do.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-05-16 14:50:00
Canada	People who refer to a father figure as "daddy"	QUOTE (jundp @ May 20 2009, 12:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Why is it weird? Especially in the south we often refer to our fathers as "Daddy." And it's generally "Mother and Daddy" or "Mama and Daddy." It's not childish, it's a term of affection. All 4 daughters referred to our father as Daddy until the day he died. Absolutely and my 22 year old daughter calls her fathe Daddy - ESPECIALLY when she wants something.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-05-20 13:43:00
Canada	Selling your home in a tough market and quickly after you bought it...	I'm a realtor and just wanted to put in my two cents..... As a realtor, most of us are trained to discourage people from renting - if you rent it and don't let me list it and sell it, I won't get paid!! Don't let that discourage you. I moved to Sweden in 2007, for one year. I rented my house then and my best friend looked after that situation until we got back last year. I have had the same tenant in the house the entire time and other than her being slow at paying the rent sometimes, it's worked out just fine. I have placed the house on the market again and hope to have it sold sometime this summer and my tenant wants to buy it......fingers crossed that she can pull it off! The point is - being the landlord can suck sometimes.....but if you are careful and diligent, it can work. There are people who okay credit but their scores are not high enough to qualify in today's market....they usually have really great jobs and can pay the rent you need to cover your mortgage.....they just can't qualify for a mortgage right now. These people are willing to pay for what they want. That's how I got my tenant. Her credit is okay, just not good enough for a mortgage with an interest rate she can afford. She makes great money......just a slow payer some months (commission sales). I don't know what the market is like where you are but overall, it's starting to come back somewhat and this is the VERY BEST time to try to sell, if you are going to do it. If you cannot get it on the market immediately to take advantage of this time of year then I would recommend that you wait until the Spring to try and sell it. I'm a Canadian Forum Lurker......I just love you guys!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-06-21 10:52:00
Canada	You moved to the U.S. to be with your SO	I am the U.S. Citizen and I moved out of my country to live in Sweden with my SO for a year. It was the hardest thing I ever did and my family still talks about how much I called and cried. My kids are grown but I had never spent an holiday away from them before, I have always lived within a few hours of ALL of my family and I have never been so homesick in my entire life. I was so lucky, my SO was very patient and loving throughout. I can tell you the things that helped me. He forced me to get out and grocery shop and explore by myself. When I didn't want to go anywhere, he MADE me take walks with him, ride our bikes and just get out. The worst thing you can do is stay home and sit at the computer. I can't stress this enough. I avoided the malls or big shopping centers on the weekends. It's hard to describe this but it felt like every time I would go to a mall or city center for shopping, every family was there and they all seemed big and happy and it just reminded me that I didn't know anyone there and of what I had left behind.....and that would set off a crying fit. I just timed those trips to during the week, kids in school, people at work.... I learned a little Swedish but most people speak some English there. I also scheduled times to call home. If I knew I was going to talk to everyone on a certain day and time, it was much easier for me to not cling to the phone all of the time "in case" someone was going to call. I learned how to knit, I started sewing again and I read a lot. The hobbies helped tremendously. It got better, with time. And by the time we decided to move back to MIssissippi, I was feeling fine and adjusted. I am supposed to move to Africa with Lars next spring......not looking forward to going through it all again but I think this time will better just because I know what to expect and how to cope.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-09-28 14:26:00
Canada	Is this too much to ask?	I'll add my two cents worth as well - someone very wise told me a long time ago - when conflicts arise, you handle YOUR family and let him handle HIS family. Of course, I never took that advice, but I wish that I had. It would have saved me tons of heartache and hurt feelings. If it were me, I'd tell him how it makes you feel, tell him you don't want him to be in the middle of this but his family has put him there so he will need to address it. Both of you need to agree, either he goes and you stay with your mom, all of you go, including your mom, or none of you go and the three of you spend Christmas together, or everyone comes to you (your house, your rules!). If you start pretending now, if you start making excuses now, this will grow into something unmanageable, very fast. Boundaries need to be established and maintained. Good luck to you on this, I hope you get it worked out and everyone is happy. Maybe this is all a misunderstanding and miscommunication between all parties and it's not exactly what it appears.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-08-18 16:50:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	VSC K-1 Approval in 124 days!!!	Congratulations! Hope they are speeding things up now!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-04-03 15:09:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	RFE -- detailed anal highlighting fanatic	I'll validate you! We received an RFE in October and it took me a month to gather what I "thought" they wanted. I sent over 6 pounds of paper to them. I highlited AND put notes all over it all, and I separated everything by colored paper. We got the text message last night - card production ordered. If you didn't get an RFE, it's easy to brush this off and tell others to take it easy. However, having had an RFE - we freaked out. We are in our 50's and our lives are not as merged as other, younger couples are. We had to dig deep to find enough to send, thankfully - it was enough. Maybe the notes and highliting helped.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-12-18 13:55:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	November 27, 2012 is when I sent in the response.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-12-19 10:21:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	I know - so relieved it's over for a while! I believe they judge these by the pound. When I sent in the initial paperwork, I didn't send in too much but what I thought was enough. After the RFE - I sent in SIX POUNDS of paper! Congratulations! What a long journey!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-12-18 10:12:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Got the text message last night - On December 17, 2012, we ordered production of your new card. WHEW!!!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-12-18 09:09:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	RFE received today I sent in what we have - the mortgage for our house, joint; joint bank accounts, tax returns with his name on the return, but he wasn't filing as he had no income (didn't work for a year and a half). I'm not really sure what else to send them. We don't have much more than that. We have another year of tax returns, another year of bank statements, another year of mortgage payments..... Any suggestions?? For the list the RFE was dated October 12.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-10-16 16:08:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Biometrics done Friday - it was the same agent that helped us get Lars' AP expedited when first got married. She remembered us and we talked for a while. Glad to have it behind us. Now waiting to see what happens next...interview or not!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-02-19 08:42:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	In other news, the receipt number on Elisha's biometrics notice is finally showing up in the online case status application. Of course, like a doofus, I immediately signed up for e-mail and SMS updates. Ours not showing up yet :-(	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-02-12 11:53:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Please update Missmissy - NOA1 January 31, 2012; Biometrics February 17, 2012. Whew! We thought UPS had lost the packet, it wasn't scanned somewhere along the way and the tracking stopped. How many actually have interviews - any ideas?	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-02-07 07:51:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Congrats, Missy! And now the love-hate (or rather, love-to-hate) relationship with VSC begins anew! You are so correct about that!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-01-30 13:30:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Add us to the list - sent the packet off today! I had that last minute OMG - as I dropped it into the UPS box, did I include everything that was needed? Was it enough? What if I forgot something? At least he's here with me now and he can "enjoy" waiting by the mailbox as much as I did last time!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-01-30 13:24:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Things are great - the time has flown by! We are mailing the packet this week, I just need to get my two affidavits back from our friends and we are good to go! So happy to see you here! Hey Missy! It's been ages. I was also hoping to see some of our fellow Marchers around here. How are things? Have you guys filed for ROC yet?	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-01-24 15:41:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Hi!!! I was hoping to find some of our "old group" hanging around! Missed you! As of this morning our checking account shows a pending debit from "VSC FIELD OFFICE PAYMENT," so it looks like our NOA1 is on the way! As an aside, the electronic debit thing annoys me... back when I filed the I-129F for my then-fiancee's K-1, I was able to get the receipt number from the online check image well before the paper NOA1 showed up in the mail. No more, apparently.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-01-24 13:10:00
Removing Conditions on Residency General Discussion	I-751 January 2012 Filers	Hey all! We are getting it ready to mail, hopefully by next week. 2 years went by FAST!!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2012-01-19 15:12:00
Philippines	Passing Time	I taught myself how to knit and now I knit all the time and mail the things that I make to everyone back in Denmark.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2008-12-21 15:57:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (Pinay Wife @ Jan 19 2009, 02:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 20 2009, 04:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Now, I HAVE to get some work done! People are buying houses today and I have closings this week. Have a great one! That's good news for the economy. Are house sales picking up lately? Yes, things here are picking up. But, in Mississippi, we didn't suffer the really awful drop that most of the rest of the nation did. 2008 was a good year for me.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-20 10:39:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	Now, I HAVE to get some work done! People are buying houses today and I have closings this week. Have a great one!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 15:24:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!		missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 15:11:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 01:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>  marriage01.bmp   297.12KB   33 downloads Ahhh #######! I didn't mean to do that!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 14:31:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	marriage01.bmp   297.12KB   33 downloads	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 14:30:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 12:04 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 11:27 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Wife: "You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?" Hubby: "When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears." Wife: "You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?" Hubby: "Yes! I see your picture and ask myself, 'what problem could be greater than this one?'" Husband: "What are you doing?" Wife: "Nothing." Husband: "Nothing? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour." Wife: "I was looking for the expiration date." A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor." Boy: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries and troubles and lighten your burden." Girl: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles." Boy: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet." Wife: "Do you want dinner?" Husband: "Sure. What are my choices?" Wife: "Yes or no." WHY IT'S BETTER TO BE A WOMAN 1. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours. 2. We can cry and get out of speeding tickets. 3. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance. 4. We have the ability to dress ourselves. 5. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems. 6. We'll never regret piercing our ears. 7. We can fully assess a person just by looking at her or his shoes. 8. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing. 9. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point). 10. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions Why men die first If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race - you're a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework - you're a wuss If you work too hard - there's never any time for her. If you don't work enough - you're a good-for-nothing lazy #######. If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay - this is exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay - you should get off your lazy azz and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her - that is favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you - it's equal opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks - it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet - it's male indifference. If you cry - you're a wimp. If you don't - you're an insensitive #######. If you make a decision without consulting her - you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you - she's a liberated woman. If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy - that's domination. If SHE asks you - it's a favor. If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear - you're a pervert. If you don't - you're gay. If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape - you're sexist. If you don't - you're unromantic. If you try to keep yourself in shape - you're vain. If you don't - you're a slob. If you buy her flowers - you're after something. If you don't - you're not thoughtful. If you're proud of your achievements - you're full of chit. If you're not - you're not ambitious. If she has a headache - she's tired. If you have a headache - you don't love her anymore. If you want it too often - you're oversexed. If you don't - there must be someone else. Men die first because they want to. I knew all of those emails that I had been saving would come in handy one day..... Men approve of premarital sex until daughters are born. If a man appears sexy, caring and smart give him a day or two, He'll be back to his usual self. A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she gets a divorce. Marriage certificate? It's just another name for her work permit. When a newly married woman smiles, all know why, but when a ten-years married woman smiles, all wonder why. "It was on this day two years ago that I lost my dear wife and children. I will never forget that game of cards..." Men lie about their jobs, drive cars they can't afford, wear toupees and loose shirts that hide their stomachs, and say they want a "real woman"... Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a mans sex drive by 90 percent.... Wedding cake!!! Bigamy is having one husband too many. Some say monogamy is the same. If a man suggests that you take a break from vacuuming the living room and relax what it means is he can't hear the TV If you think he's listening to you, you're wrong he's trying to convert what you just said into something with a sexual connotation If a man had a thought in his head, it would get lonely! If men got pregnant.... abortion would be available in convenience stores and drive-through windows. Men are like roller coasters: when it's good you don't want to get off, and when it isn't... you can't wait to throw up. Behind every great man is a woman with a vibrator If he asks you if you're faking it tell him no, you're just practicing. Scientist have finally discovered the chemical formula for Viagra. 1% Sodium 1% Iron 1% Phosphate 97% Fix-a-Flat Remember; you are known by the idiot you accompany Definition of a bachelor: A man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable. Women don't make fools of men most of them are the "do-it-yourself" types. The best reason to divorce or break-up with a man is for health reasons you're sick of him. The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him check books. A man's idea of serious commitment is usually, "Oh alright, I'll stay the night." What Would Be Different If Men Really Ruled the World Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number. Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to "I love you." Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again" cards. When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the #### and a "Nice hustle, you'll get 'em next time" would pretty much do it. Birth control would come in ale or lager. Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the NFL team of your choice. The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO. At the end of the workday, a whistle would blow and you'd jump out your window and slide down the tail of a brontosaurus and right into your car like Fred Flintstone. Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the "public ugliness" ordinance. Tanks would be far easier to rent. Garbage would take itself out. Instead of beer belly, you'd get "beer biceps." Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your wife- to-be with a giant foam hand that said, "You're #1!" Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years. On Groundhog Day, if you saw your shadow, you'd get the day off to go drinking. Mother's Day, too. St. Patrick's Day, however, would remain exactly the same. But it would be celebrated every month. Cops would be broadcast live, and you could phone in advice to the pursuing cops. Or to the crooks. The victors in any athletic competition would get to kill and eat the losers. The only show opposite Monday Night Football would be Monday Night Football from a Different Camera Angle. It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car, as long as you returned it the following day with a full tank of gas. Every man would get four real Get Out of Jail Free cards per year. When a cop gave you a ticket, every smart-aleck answer you responded with would actually reduce your fine. As in: Cop: "You know how fast you were going" You: "All I know is, I was spilling my beer all over the place." Cop: "Nice one. That's $10 off." People would never talk about how fresh they felt. Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 13:12:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 10:56 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 10:36 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 10:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 09:53 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 09:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 09:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> A man found a Magic Lamp. The genie asks what he wishes for. The man asks to be irresistible to women, So the genie turned him into a box of chocolates. "Men are like grapes. You have to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with." One day a woman was granted one wish from a genie. She could have anything in the world and she asked to never have to cook or clean again. The genie sat there for a moment, smile and then POOF!!!! She made the woman a man. Why do men want to marry virgins? Because men can't stand criticism. I got a million of em! why are women's feet so small? so they can stand closer to the sink while washing dishes. what's the difference between a washing machine and a woman? a washing machine doesn't think you have a relationship just because you dropped a load in it. why does the bride smile when she walks down the aisle? because she knows she just gave her last bj. why does the bride wear white? so she'll match the rest of the kitchen appliances. what's the definition of a wife? an attachment you screw on the bed to get the housework done. i got millions of them too You are are funny!! (ha ha, not like a clown) Why were men given larger brains than dogs? So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. How many men does it take to do the dishes? I don't know but I will let you know when it happens. What's a man's idea of cleaning the bathroom? Flushing the toilet. I would much rather laugh at this issue than get mad about it. Let's turn this around, start posting your jokes! wait, we have larger brains than dogs? how many women does it take to change a lightbulb? none, they'd rather sit in the dark and b!tch about it. What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side. Why don't women wear watches? There's a clock on the stove. How many men does it take to open a beer? None, it should be opened when she brings it to you. What do you call a woman with two brain cells? Pregnant. Why haven't any women ever gone to the moon? It doesn't need cleaning yet Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die. Any married man can forget his past mistakes, there's no reason for two people to keep track of the same things. God spoke to Adam: GOD: Adam - first, the good news! I have given you a brain & a #######. ADAM: Wow, thanks God!! Now... what's the bad news? GOD: You have only enough blood to use one at a time. How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious oders and half the time they don't work. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to screw in the bulb and two to brag to about the screwing part. What is the difference between a sofa and a man watching Monday Night Football? The sofa doesn't keep asking for beer. made this one back when i had a dog: 10. she does not care what time i come home, just that i came home. 9. she does not need a car to drive, jewelry, or expensive clothes 8. she does not mind when i pet other dogs 7. she does not get upset when i drink a beer, or burp, or fart.. 6. she does not care if i leave the toilet lid up or put the tp on the other way 5. she does not need to go shopping 4. she does not care if i buy myself something and not her 3. she does not go through pms or ask me if i think she is fat 2. she does not mind being called ###### 1. she has 10 tits! TOP 10 REASONS WHY A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN: 10. You can trade your old .44 for two new .22's. 9. You can have one handgun at home and another for the road. 8. If you admire a friend's handgun and tell him so, he will be flattered and let you try a few rounds with it. 7. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a backup. 6. Your handgun will stay with you, even if you are out of ammo. 5. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space. 4. Handguns function normally every day of the month. 3. A handgun won't ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?" 2. A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you've used it. AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN: 1. You can buy a SILENCER for a handgun Wife: "You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?" Hubby: "When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears." Wife: "You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?" Hubby: "Yes! I see your picture and ask myself, 'what problem could be greater than this one?'" Husband: "What are you doing?" Wife: "Nothing." Husband: "Nothing? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour." Wife: "I was looking for the expiration date." A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor." Boy: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries and troubles and lighten your burden." Girl: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles." Boy: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet." Wife: "Do you want dinner?" Husband: "Sure. What are my choices?" Wife: "Yes or no." WHY IT'S BETTER TO BE A WOMAN 1. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours. 2. We can cry and get out of speeding tickets. 3. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance. 4. We have the ability to dress ourselves. 5. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems. 6. We'll never regret piercing our ears. 7. We can fully assess a person just by looking at her or his shoes. 8. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing. 9. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point). 10. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 12:27:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 10:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 09:53 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 09:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 09:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> A man found a Magic Lamp. The genie asks what he wishes for. The man asks to be irresistible to women, So the genie turned him into a box of chocolates. "Men are like grapes. You have to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with." One day a woman was granted one wish from a genie. She could have anything in the world and she asked to never have to cook or clean again. The genie sat there for a moment, smile and then POOF!!!! She made the woman a man. Why do men want to marry virgins? Because men can't stand criticism. I got a million of em! why are women's feet so small? so they can stand closer to the sink while washing dishes. what's the difference between a washing machine and a woman? a washing machine doesn't think you have a relationship just because you dropped a load in it. why does the bride smile when she walks down the aisle? because she knows she just gave her last bj. why does the bride wear white? so she'll match the rest of the kitchen appliances. what's the definition of a wife? an attachment you screw on the bed to get the housework done. i got millions of them too You are are funny!! (ha ha, not like a clown) Why were men given larger brains than dogs? So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. How many men does it take to do the dishes? I don't know but I will let you know when it happens. What's a man's idea of cleaning the bathroom? Flushing the toilet. I would much rather laugh at this issue than get mad about it. Let's turn this around, start posting your jokes! wait, we have larger brains than dogs? how many women does it take to change a lightbulb? none, they'd rather sit in the dark and b!tch about it. What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side. Why don't women wear watches? There's a clock on the stove. How many men does it take to open a beer? None, it should be opened when she brings it to you. What do you call a woman with two brain cells? Pregnant. Why haven't any women ever gone to the moon? It doesn't need cleaning yet Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die. Any married man can forget his past mistakes, there's no reason for two people to keep track of the same things. God spoke to Adam: GOD: Adam - first, the good news! I have given you a brain & a #######. ADAM: Wow, thanks God!! Now... what's the bad news? GOD: You have only enough blood to use one at a time. How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious oders and half the time they don't work. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to screw in the bulb and two to brag to about the screwing part. What is the difference between a sofa and a man watching Monday Night Football? The sofa doesn't keep asking for beer.	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 11:36:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (charles! @ Jan 19 2009, 09:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (missmissy @ Jan 19 2009, 09:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> A man found a Magic Lamp. The genie asks what he wishes for. The man asks to be irresistible to women, So the genie turned him into a box of chocolates. "Men are like grapes. You have to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with." One day a woman was granted one wish from a genie. She could have anything in the world and she asked to never have to cook or clean again. The genie sat there for a moment, smile and then POOF!!!! She made the woman a man. Why do men want to marry virgins? Because men can't stand criticism. I got a million of em! why are women's feet so small? so they can stand closer to the sink while washing dishes. what's the difference between a washing machine and a woman? a washing machine doesn't think you have a relationship just because you dropped a load in it. why does the bride smile when she walks down the aisle? because she knows she just gave her last bj. why does the bride wear white? so she'll match the rest of the kitchen appliances. what's the definition of a wife? an attachment you screw on the bed to get the housework done. i got millions of them too You are are funny!! (ha ha, not like a clown) Why were men given larger brains than dogs? So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. How many men does it take to do the dishes? I don't know but I will let you know when it happens. What's a man's idea of cleaning the bathroom? Flushing the toilet. I would much rather laugh at this issue than get mad about it. Let's turn this around, start posting your jokes!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 10:53:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	QUOTE (vbtbmrt @ Jan 19 2009, 06:37 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> this might not go over well but here is something i found one time and it took alot of thinking before i realized it hits home real close Top Ten Reasons Why American Women Suck 1) Selfish - to the point where they don't know the difference between love of self and plain downright greed--and drilled into believing that whatever happens is the fault of whatever man is in their life because of the feminist crud drilled into them by the cadre of asexual closet cases called "therapists" who appear on "Ricki", "Oprah" or other such electronic drivel Don't know what to say to this - I had to work to support our children while he drank and gambled away everything we had. He sold anything that wasn't hidden at my parents house. 2) Deluded - into thinking they "deserve" a rich, model-handsome husband who will "take them away from all of this"--whatever the "this" might be--and leading to resentment when they discover that the universe does NOT revolve around them I did want someone to "take me away from all of this" I admit it. And I did have fantasies of someone rich coming into my life and making it all better. 3) Angry - ALL the damn time about things which are so far out of their control as to be nonsensical--and constantly wanting to "discuss" this mind numbing drivel ad nauseam I didn't get angry until we were separated and then I got angry about how long it took me to see what was going on. 4) Psychotic - multiple personalities in the same woman - as "Nomad" put it in the "Star Trek" episode: "Woman...a mass of inconsistencies...", and also when the feminist voices in their heads start with the regrets and victim acculturation Huh?? 5) Worthless - anything that does not immediately resolve itself in her favor or to her benefit is meaningless to her, especially husband and family I worked two jobs for many years, to keep food on the table and a roof over our heads and to pay for college tuition for 3 kids. There wasn't any time for anyone's panties to be in a wad over anything. 6) Lazy - drilled into their head that they "deserve" a maid, nanny and personal slave to take care of every detail - and that their husband/boyfriend is REQUIRED to cater to their each and every mindless whim I wish I had had a maid and a nanny, I wish that my ex had washed a dish or bathed a kid or even worked an hour or two occasionally. 7) Resentful - especially of other women who have things that they do not, in material, spiritual and esoteric senses Again, no time to be resentful 8) Greedy - to them, "housekeeping" means getting the house in the divorce (thanks to Zsa Zsa for that immortal line) and sucking the guy for every last cent, even if they had nothing to do with the building of the nest egg I didn't get to keep the house, even though I made the mortgage payments, paid the taxes and insurance, maintained the outside and inside, kept the yard up....his mother hired a big fancy lawyer for him and I lost the house. He wanted support as well but I didn't have to pay him. 9) Mindless - constant, irritating, idle prattle about topics they read about in some women's magazine and then become instant experts--particularly pop psychology and the latest ####### they see on "Oprah" or "Ricki" Whatever! I spend my time getting riled up by what I read on VJ these days! 10) Vain - believing that they are irresistible to everything in pants and therefore are allowed to behave sluttish and without any honor. I'm 49 and not delusional. I know that I'm not irresistible to everything in pants and haven't behaved sluttish in......hmmm.......well I was in Denmark visiting my SO last week, I guess I acted a little sluttish then...but he liked it![b]	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 10:21:00
Philippines	American Woman Bitter and Lonely?!	A man found a Magic Lamp. The genie asks what he wishes for. The man asks to be irresistible to women, So the genie turned him into a box of chocolates. "Men are like grapes. You have to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with." One day a woman was granted one wish from a genie. She could have anything in the world and she asked to never have to cook or clean again. The genie sat there for a moment, smile and then POOF!!!! She made the woman a man. Why do men want to marry virgins? Because men can't stand criticism. I got a million of em!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-19 10:07:00
Philippines	Cheaters..and those who marry cheaters	I want to play too!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-01-27 13:22:00
Philippines	WHAT IF.......	Surprised that this thread is still hanging around....I thought it had all been said by now	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-03-16 13:16:00
Philippines	Good Free Dating site	QUOTE (lotus101 @ May 1 2009, 10:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE missmissy' wrote I haven't told my SO about the foot fetish thing yet. Do you think he will be upset? My guess is, he will not likely upset about it, if he is into it he probably will like it as much as you do. Thanks!!!	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-05-01 10:29:00
Philippines	Good Free Dating site	QUOTE (felb @ May 1 2009, 01:06 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (4MYMEVE @ May 1 2009, 02:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> QUOTE (lotus101 @ Apr 30 2009, 10:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> or a guy who has a foot fetish and don't even bother to tell you about it. & just what the Heck is wrong with that?! not telling is wrong. I haven't told my SO about the foot fetish thing yet. Do you think he will be upset? QUOTE (uscandual @ Apr 30 2009, 09:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> This should be entertaining to watch. The weekend coming up, lots of people with nothing better to do....	missmissy	Female	Denmark	2009-05-01 09:53:00