ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
CanadaAny problems obtaining Employment?
QUOTE (Emancipation @ May 22 2008, 06:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (anxiouslywaiting @ May 22 2008, 09:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Emancipation @ May 22 2008, 07:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (anxiouslywaiting @ May 21 2008, 02:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I will be living in Connecticut. I guess my concern is that I know I won't be able to work right away as I have to wait for my SSN and what not so I was wondering if I should still start applying before I get the authorization to work? (sorry I don't know all the names and what not for that stuff).

YEAHHHHH Another Nutmegger!!!! You do realize that CT is where Insurance started in the US right? the heads of many Insurance co's are in Hartford smile.gif So if you are moving close to Hartford then you are all set!!!

If you are moving near New Haven.. the word on the street is to get on with temp agencies that place people into Yale - it's employees get AMAZING benefits (try 1 month off vacation a YEAR), etc.. so it's the most desired place to work and they have all KINDS of different jobs to do over there..

I had no problems finding work in CT.. seems like a dedicated, hardworking and intelligent worker is difficult to find in these parts (who knew).. the hardest thing in CT is to actually find a job that pays well... that's the trick.. it's an expensive state so you need to make 15$-20$ an hour to even think about it being worth it!!

http://www.ctjobs.com/

http://www.kaiserwhitney.com/


thank you so much, finally another person in CT!!! I know that Hartford is the Insurance Capital of North America but for me to drive into Hartford from where I will be is aroundan hour or more! We are in Redding, CT! I don't know how far away we are from New Haven (not too familiar with CT). But I definitely like the idea of 1 month vacation!!!

I know that CT is expensive, gosh just by looking at the prices of houses I almost had a heart attack! How do people afford to live there! That is good to know about the hourly wage, thank you!

Thanks for the websites, I will keep them handy when I start to look for work. Still waiting on my interview! Just a quick question is the second website you gave me a temp agency??? Thanks again.


Yep the second is a temp agency that fills positions at Yale.. but yep.. New Haven will be further for you than Hartford.. and from where you'll be geographically the traffic to Hartford would be attrocious!! Danbury will be your closest "big" city.. haven't tried a job search there, but CT jobs might be a place to start! smile.gif People here find it pretty hard to make ends meet here.. We struggle, but make ends meet by getting stuff for free or almost free with CVS (drugstore) and shopping at Aldi's (super discount food place), and just watching the gas we use (it's 4.14 a gallon here tonite) UGH>. anyway, I'll help ya out as much as I can with the "do's and don'ts"!! I'm just thrilled there's another CDN out there in CT!! YEAH!!!


Yeah I talked to my fiance tonight and he said that New Haven is a bit of a hike and so is Hartford where we are right now. I don't anticipate we will stay in Redding forever, since my fiance has to be within so many miles from work that will limit me as to where I can work but if I do end up working in Hartford our plan would be to move somewhere that is between Hartford and Newtown. I have heard that CT is very expensive and it does worry me especially since I am moving there without a job. I would absolutely love to know the dos and donts especially when it comes to saving money! I am totally thrilled that there is another CDN down in CT!
anxiouslywaitingFemaleCanada2008-05-22 19:26:00
CanadaAny problems obtaining Employment?
QUOTE (Emancipation @ May 22 2008, 07:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (anxiouslywaiting @ May 21 2008, 02:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I will be living in Connecticut. I guess my concern is that I know I won't be able to work right away as I have to wait for my SSN and what not so I was wondering if I should still start applying before I get the authorization to work? (sorry I don't know all the names and what not for that stuff).

YEAHHHHH Another Nutmegger!!!! You do realize that CT is where Insurance started in the US right? the heads of many Insurance co's are in Hartford smile.gif So if you are moving close to Hartford then you are all set!!!

If you are moving near New Haven.. the word on the street is to get on with temp agencies that place people into Yale - it's employees get AMAZING benefits (try 1 month off vacation a YEAR), etc.. so it's the most desired place to work and they have all KINDS of different jobs to do over there..

I had no problems finding work in CT.. seems like a dedicated, hardworking and intelligent worker is difficult to find in these parts (who knew).. the hardest thing in CT is to actually find a job that pays well... that's the trick.. it's an expensive state so you need to make 15$-20$ an hour to even think about it being worth it!!

http://www.ctjobs.com/

http://www.kaiserwhitney.com/


thank you so much, finally another person in CT!!! I know that Hartford is the Insurance Capital of North America but for me to drive into Hartford from where I will be is aroundan hour or more! We are in Redding, CT! I don't know how far away we are from New Haven (not too familiar with CT). But I definitely like the idea of 1 month vacation!!!

I know that CT is expensive, gosh just by looking at the prices of houses I almost had a heart attack! How do people afford to live there! That is good to know about the hourly wage, thank you!

Thanks for the websites, I will keep them handy when I start to look for work. Still waiting on my interview! Just a quick question is the second website you gave me a temp agency??? Thanks again.
anxiouslywaitingFemaleCanada2008-05-22 08:21:00
CanadaAny problems obtaining Employment?
QUOTE (liz_legend @ May 21 2008, 07:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
you CAN apply before you get work authorization!
apply as soon as you get into the US!!!!


I finally just finished ready the thread of EI and that is my understanding just to apply as soon as I get to the US. I guess my confusion lies with the whole K1/I194 (or whatever it is called) and the 90 day work thingy. My lawyer advised me that I would be able to work as soon as I entered the USA but from reading this thread it doesn't appear that way at all. SO CONFUSED!
anxiouslywaitingFemaleCanada2008-05-21 19:26:00
CanadaAny problems obtaining Employment?
QUOTE (trailmix @ May 21 2008, 06:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (anxiouslywaiting @ May 21 2008, 04:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thank you everyone for your responses. I guess I have having a little bit of anxiety because I am leaving such a good job and an amazing company and it would be absolutely dreadful if I wasn't able to find decent employment. Don't get me wrong the reason why we chose to live in the US is because my fiance has a really good job but that doesn't mean I don't need to work. One of the reasons why I am not so sure if I want to stay in the Insurance industry is because in Connecticut you need to have a licence so I am not sure what the process would be to go about getting that but if I am not able to work for 3 months then I guess that will give me some time to get the licence!!!


Don't forget to apply for EI!


I know I just found out today that we can apply for EI ... how great! The only thing is that we can't apply until we have our work authorization which can take up to 3 months to get so that means by the time I can qualify for EI I may have already found a job! Oh well at least it will be a back up plan if I can't find employment right away.
anxiouslywaitingFemaleCanada2008-05-21 18:13:00
CaribbeanWebsite says ISSUED!!!
Have you received your visa in hand yet? My status changed to issued on the 31 of July. Trying to get an idea as to when he can pick it up.
nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-08-05 14:02:00
CaribbeanJamaican Embassy... please help
You will get a reply soon. Keep in mind today Thursday was a holiday so it did not count. I recommend you resend the email again tonight to BOTH email addresses. I have gotten responses as early as 7am Jamaica time. DOS can give you your interview date. But they cannot give you the interview letter that you NEED for the medical and embassy entrance. So bottom line you must find a way to obtain a copy of your appointment letter.
Btw here are the prompts to press for DOS gets you through quickly. 1,6,2,3,2,0,0
nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-08-01 22:58:00
CaribbeanNon-impediment to marriage in Jamaica
It shows that you are FREE to marry no existing marriages as it is illegal to be married to two different people at the same time. So if you are the fiancé living in JA then yes go get the non impediment to prove you ate now single and FREE to marry
nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-07-27 18:37:00
USCIS Service CentersDo NOA 2's arrive by e-mail only at night/early morning?
I got my text at 1pm on a Tuesday.
nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-05-22 19:12:00
US Embassy and Consulate DiscussionEmbassy in Jamaica
Honey. Don't hold your breath. My fiancé never received his package! This is what I did. I personally sent the embassy a emailed scanned sighned copy of the DS-230. I waited 5 days. Then I emailed them and asked that they assign him a interview date. And send me an exact replica of the packet they will be mailin to him. That is how we progressed. My fiancé interviewed on June 28 and to this day the packet never reached his post office in Portland. So don't wait for it trust me! Inbox me if you need more advice
nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-07-17 16:57:00
US Embassy and Consulate DiscussionK1 Jamaica medical apt

I just asked my fiance and he said they did not ask to see his passport when he went for the medical.


Can you ask him wich center he did his medical in please?

Edited by nadi2444, 30 May 2013 - 06:07 AM.


nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-05-30 06:06:00
US Embassy and Consulate DiscussionK1 Jamaica medical apt
So my fiancé has his interview scheduled for June 28th. There is a hold up with his passport it won't be ready till like June 24th.

My question is: will they allow him to take the medical without the passport? Or will they allow him to take the medical 4 days before the interview to assure he had his passport?


nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-05-29 15:50:00
US Embassy and Consulate DiscussionU.S. Embassy in Jamaica; 4-6 weeks to receive interview date for K1 Visa?
Yup sounds about right. It takes a little over a month to get a date. And this has been the trend for K1 filers all year. Check some timelines as reference. Use the time to get ready as the previous person suggested. You medical alone will have to be done 2 weeks before the interview. So the time flies.
Not to mention after you are approved it takes another month or longer to get the visa in your hand!!!!! The wait is barely over but you ate half way there.
nadi2444Not TellingJamaica2013-07-27 05:57:00
VietnamI-130 Approved

Good morning Vietnam!

 

Good news this morning. I received and email last night (Vietnam night/USA day) that our I-130 petition was approved. Took about 120 days from NOA1 to NOA2. We did have an RFE which slowed things down by about a month. Anyway, thanks for all the support here in the Vietnam regional forum. Hopefully that continues through the next step of the process at NVC.

 

Those that are still waiting. Be patient. If you did all your paperwork correctly and took time to do things right, collected all the needed supporting documents then your time will come soon.

 

Happy Times!

 

Congrats!!! I'm very happy for you! :D

Now I have a sudden urge to watch "Good Morning Vietnam". :P


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-18 07:01:00
VietnamNew here and very confused!

TF, I am glad to hear that.

So did you ever find out why your friend's son didn't get married when he went to Vi?t Nam?

I was just wondering what is the age gap between you two?



My girlfriend will be 25 in 2 months and I'll be 33 in 3 months. My friend's son is about 24 and the girl is 23, just a FYI. :)

 Well at first, my friend didn't know anything about what had happened and he was there. Which was puzzling. All he said was that his son came running into the hotel room, planted himself face first into a pillow and was crying. At home, his son started having random outbursts of rage like slamming doors and yelling a lot. I believe after a month or so, he finally calmed down and told his dad what happened. Apparently, this girl he was supposed to marry left her phone at their hotel room. So my friend's daughter decides to go through it, as she had that "female intuition" feeling. She found messages from a man saying "I love you my angel", things of that nature. When my friend's son found this out, he called off the wedding. From then on, the story got bigger and bigger. I heard things about like during the wedding photo shoot, the girl was flirting with the photographer (he has a business with his wife and she was there too) and while she was changing into her dress, the photographer saw her half naked. Also at dinner, she was sitting next to the photographer and not her soon-to-be husband. Later on, I befriended my friend's son and daughter as I was invited to join them in going to Vietnam next year during Tet. We went out to eat together and my friend's daughter did all the talking. Her husband and her brother hardly said a word. But that is all she talked about was her brother getting fooled and I should watch out for the girl I'm talking to (pre-relationship status with my girlfriend). They wanted to "hook me up" with a girl they knew instead. I didn't like the idea at all because in my experience with people trying to hook me up with someone they THINK is a good match, it never turns out good. But anyhow!

 Over the course of months, their story would change. First it was a laptop found in the hotel, then a mobile phone. Then it was she came back for her phone that same day and grabbed it out of my friend's daughter's hands, deleting all the messages from this guy. And apparently they talked to this girl's mother, saying a rough looking guy is always hanging around her. The guy quit school and does other bad things (god, this sounds like a Korean drama I've watched!). This is around the time I contacted the girl to ask her side of the story. I never could go a night at work or a day at home without hearing SOMETHING about it. It haunted me to the point where I started questioning my girlfriend and being mean to her. My girlfriend and I stopped talking for awhile because I was so confused on who to believe. Several weeks went by and I felt terrible for how I acted towards her. So we made up. She understood my doubts and was willing to give me another chance. Not too long after my girlfriend and I made up, I lost about 5 people on my Facebook in the span of minutes! My friend's family deleted and blocked me from Facebook! Later on I received a text message from my friend's daughter saying they "caught" me liking and commenting on that girl's (the girl my friend's son was supposed to marry) Facebook. She also seem to believe that I was talking to her because I wanted to be with her. She wished me the best of luck and said to be prepared for a lot of heartache and wasting my money. I had never laughed so hard! So they didn't delete me because I made up with my girlfriend, but they think I want to be with this other girl. WOW! I was so stunned! So that was that. :)



 

 When I contacted this girl my friend's son was supposed to marry, she told me some things that was not told from my friend's family. My friend's sister-in-law told this girl that she was ugly, not of light skin and too short for her nephew. She also said that she was never given a chance to explain herself. I totally understand this because they never gave me a chance to explain why I contacted this girl in the first place. My friend's daughter basically gets on Facebook and puts out an "APB" to anyone who is friends with me or this girl and to delete them NOW! At least, that's my opinion. I don't know how I was deleted by 5 people so quickly.


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-18 11:41:00
VietnamNew here and very confused!

TighField, I agree with Chris & Trinh. Any relationship is hard work, when you face someone everyday, there are ups and downs in one's life that the other needs to know how to listen and comfort in order for the relationship to last. Talking online everyday probably will only shows you one side of the person. But in order for you to truly knows the person and if that person will be a good wife a good mother you need to interact with her in person to see. So on your trip maybe for the first 2 weeks hang out with her and her family then 3rd do the Dam hoi if you really want to start the visa process.

Don't be offended from this next suggestion ok. I am just putting it out there since I don't know your relationship details. Is there any doubt that she wants to use you to get out of Vietnam? How long have you guys talked online? Vietnamese are fairly conservative so why did she suggest she wants to marry you first? And how come her mom doesn't mind if the wedding is in the US or in Vietnam? She doesn't want to see her daughter in a wedding dress? Those were just some red flags for me and it could be red flag later during the interview.

 Thanks HaleyD, for replying to my post. My girlfriend and I have had many, many conversations on the phone and Skype about the ups and downs of a relationship. We both understand the hard work we are faced with and I understand that talking online only gets you so far with someone. Meeting in person will be like icing on the cake, the finishing touch. Whether that cake is good or not is yet to be seen (get your minds out of the gutter, gentlemen!) I wish I could visit Vietnam sooner or more often but like I said, my job won't allow that and we have a strict policy on vacations.

 My girlfriend and I have talked online since December 2012. Prior to our conversation about marriage, we've talked about it before but that's all it was. She would often tell me not to think too much about it, that we don't know what the future holds. But once she wanted to have that serious conversation about marriage, it just opened up so many things for us to talk about. As far as her mother not minding where the wedding is (US or Vietnam), I had thought about if we could fly her mother in the states for a duration for the wedding. We still have so many things to talk about, so I can't be certain when, where, why, etc. And I don't want to talk about everything in one day. I wanted us to take our time discussing it since we still have over 6 months until my trip, but I don't want to wait till last minute either.

 As far as her using me to get out of Vietnam, no. She's perfectly happy with her job and where she lives. She has many good close friends and a wonderful family. This isn't a story about the poor girl looking to swindle the so-called rich American. She doesn't work at a bar or a dancer at some club, like so many stories I've heard. My girlfriend and I know these stories, from both sides. Her mother has told her about what most American men only want but also how some Vietnamese women trick the unlucky American men. I really appreciate all the comments about this. It's good to know there is a place like this to go to for advice or just a simple inquire of the process and it's nice to know I'm not alone. smile.png




Edited by Tighfield, 18 July 2013 - 06:53 AM.

TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-18 06:49:00
VietnamNew here and very confused!

 

Seriously how can you marry someone you have not even met. Even if the best intentions are there, online and reality are not always the same. Marrying in Vietnam culture is a lot different than in Western culture. What happened to your friend's son, happens many times here and is very common even amoung Vietnamese marrying another Vietnamese. The wedding gets called off at the last minute for many different reasons, mostly one side of the family disagrees about something, or the bride finds a richer man to marry. I'm not even joking. I've lived here for 4 years and have seen it all first hand.

 

Come here as planned and get to know her personally in person. Do some traveling together. Sure, a dam hoi is a good start and will help your guy's visa process if that is what you both wish to do after your meeting together, which hopefully it is and makes you guys even closer. However, meeting one time, getting engaged, and then applying for a K1 wont be the easiest road by any means. A dam hoi will help though for sure. Make sure to keep records records records of everything. Receipts, chats, photos, airline records etc......

 

I am not meaning to talk bad about Vietnamese women by any means by what I said above. I married a Vietnamese woman and am the happiest. She is a wonderful wife and mother to our son. Life is great. You just need to be open minded and not have a one track mind clouded by bad decisions and judgements because online everything si perfect. It is easy to be taken advantage of here. So keep that in mind, but try your best to cover all your bases and give it the best chance you can.

 

Good luck

Thank you for your words. By no means do I take your reply negatively. I understand your concerns about not meeting first because everyone asks me the same thing. Even when I told them about my girlfriend and I being officially a couple, many didn't understand. My friend who I am travelling with has been very supportive as well as a few people I work with. My parents however do not understand. They never understood online dating with local women, much alone internationally. I will keep what you have said in mind. Thanks again. :)


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-14 11:06:00
VietnamNew here and very confused!

 

you need to see the visa timeline,  you can go there and propose the first week at a restaurant somewhere nice western style and also meet her parents, possibly have dinner every day there the first week allow them to get to know you a bit informally.,  but also Plan your Dam hoi or asking/engagement ceremony to take place  the 2nd week. and on the third week tour the country some. it takes 6 to 7 months to clear the states NOA2 then one more month thru the NVC to the consulate.  then it is between 96 to 108 days for the interview. so 10 to 11 months minimum.

Here are some problems you may face:

  1. Proof of inperson meeting, it is illegal for you two to stay in the hotel together unmarried. you can still do it but the hotel will not provide documentation for you to use as they turn in the names to the local police. Get photos with date/time stamp on them. bookings for tours that record your names, in country flights with the itenarys with both of your names on them. Airline tickets don't have the year on them so they get rejected but the luggage claim tickets do why is that I don't know. I had trouble with this even with hundreds of photos. (no time stamp)
  2. not being on this site when I started and not sending in all the proper documents. Print them all and bring with you. She will need to sign at least the Fianc'e intent to Marry form. also the her biographic form and her part of the I129f.

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I really like how you laid out the week to week planning. That sounds like a great idea! I know she wants to take me to Vung Tau because I have never seen the beach, as funny as that sounds. Actually my friend and I are getting a hotel that is literally 7-10 minutes from her house. Her mother wanted me to stay in my girlfrend's brother's room so she can get to know me better, but I told my girlfriend that I would not want to be a burden. Plus my friend is coming along and I think he would feel uncomfortable. Her mother said that was okay just as long as I visit her every day. Haha! :)


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-14 08:29:00
VietnamNew here and very confused!

Hey y'all! smile.png

  I have been reading many stories on this forum for a few months now (off and on), so I have finally decided to sign up. I feel that this journey is not only a long road ahead, but a lonely one. I do not have the support of my parents nor my friend (who is married to a Vietnamese woman and has children). A little background about me, my girlfriend and why I mention my friend...

  Last year (Fall of 2012), my friend told me that his son was getting married to a Vietnamese girl in Vietnam. They had been talking online (Skype, Viber, Facebook and e-mails) for 2 to 2 1/2 years, BUT have never met. Having studied Korean culture for 5 years, I was intrigued about what Vietnamese culture was all about. My friend told me a lot of things about Vietnam and a little bit about the culture. I was hooked and dying to try some ph?! December of 2012 is when my girlfriend and I began talking online. At the time, it was just simple messages back and forth about our cultures, food, music and language. I had never even considered, at this time, she would end up being my girlfriend. She was just someone teaching me about their culture. Her English is very good although sometimes her meanings for things is misunderstood, but I am a patient man and always ask questions. January 2013, my friend flew to Vietnam for his son's wedding. After about a week had passed, I expected to see wedding pictures on Facebook from his son's wedding. I checked every day and nothing. Something was very strange! Then one day I saw their relationship status on Facebook go from "Engaged" to nothing! I was seriously worried by this point, but I had no way of contacting my friend so I had to wait until they flew back to the US. When my friend returned home, I was right, something did happen! His son didn't get married! And even to this day I don't understand completely what happened. I've heard multiple things said about what went down and the stories change every time I hear them. I even went as far as contacting the girl my friend's son was supposed to marry! And while her story matched up on some things that my friend's family had said, other things didn't. It just sounded like one huge misunderstanding... on both sides. And because I contacted the girl my friend's son was supposed to marry, my friend and I are no longer friends. His WHOLE family hates me now because they think I was trying to get with this girl, which yet again, another misunderstanding. I wasn't even allowed to explain myself. Sure, I probably shouldn't have done it but my girlfriend and I thought it was a good idea at the time.



 

 So now this brings me to the present. My girlfriend and I have just recently been talking about marriage. We were looking at pictures of half-Vietnamese / half-American children that other couples post on Facebook and joking around saying "Hey! Does this little girl look like you or me?" Then my girlfriend says to me, "I have something serious to talk to you about." She told me that she wishes to marry me and asked me how I felt about it. I literally almost fell out of my computer chair after hearing this! I told her I would love to marry her. Now I know what y'all are thinking. Stupid right? Because we haven't met yet. My girlfriend and I literally talk every day via Skype, Viber and Facebook. I work 3rd shift so I am on the same schedule as her, so it is easy for us to talk whenever throughout the day. I have planned a trip to go see her next year during Tet holiday and I am going with a really good friend of mine, so I won't be alone. The more we talk about this marriage, the more serious it gets. We love and care for each other very much and we know that this is the direction our relationship is going. And since we have started talking about marriage, I have been looking up everything I can find and think of to better educate me in how we can get married. My brain is on overload from all this and it has left me confused and her too! We thought about doing the K-1 Visa but we need to be engaged. And then I read on Fred Walh's site (that guy that "specializes" in matchmaking) that Vietnam has one of the highest rejections rates of K-1 Visas. Mainly because they look for how long you've been engaged and whether or not you had a large, formal engagement party in Vietnam (not on the first trip!) This worries me, because I am not in the position to make all these trips back and forth, back and forth to Vietnam. My job won't allow it! I'm lucky enough to even be allowed to fly there next year and stay for 3 weeks. So maybe the K-1 Visa isn't the best option? My girlfriend has said that her mother approves of us getting married and her mother doesn't mind if the wedding is in Vietnam or the US. She only wants her daughter to be happy. Now you see, my friend (ex-friend I mean), his son was only going to make the one trip and he proposed to the girl over Skype. My girlfriend doesn't not want a proposal over Skype, she wants it in person and I can understand her reasoning.

  So! VJ community! This is where I ask for your advice on how my girlfriend and I can handle this. I know that no matter what road we take, it will be difficult. Would it be better for us to marry in Vietnam, as my ex-friend's son was going to do or could I get engaged to my girlfriend during my trip next year and come home then start the K-1 Visa process. I know I still have awhile before my trip to Vietnam, but I always like to be prepared and I know that some good information would ease my girlfriend's feelings. We are both just so confused about this. sad.png

 Thank you in advance for any advice y'all can provide and I deeply apologize for this long post. Have a great day everybody! smile.png




 


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-14 07:18:00
VietnamWhen you're gathering your chat logs, e-mails, etc...

Thanks for the information, y'all. :)


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-24 08:48:00
VietnamWhen you're gathering your chat logs, e-mails, etc...

Hey y'all!

 I know it's still early in the game for me to be printing out chat logs, e-mails, etc. as I would have to be very updated with them by the time I needed. But one thing I was wondering. We have messages from a site where we first started talking. The thing is, I have no way of saving these messages or copying/pasting them. Your inbox pretty much looks like what your e-mail inbox would look like, each message (send & received) is separated. I'm just wondering if I would be allowed to take a screenshot of each message..? I know this would be a very tiresome task, but it's how we met online so it's very important. helpsmilie.gif


Edited by Tighfield, 21 July 2013 - 08:30 AM.

TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-21 08:28:00
Vietnaminterview

my wife has an interview in Ho Chi Minh,  Vietnam on Aug 16

It has been a long road, and in sight is The beginning of A new wonderful world

dancin5hr.gif

 

Congratulations! Best of luck to you and your wife! kicking.gif


Edited by Tighfield, 26 July 2013 - 10:02 AM.

TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-26 10:02:00
VietnamQuestion regarding foreign degrees and working in the US.

I have a very similar situation she has a degree as medical translator VN - French and VN - English.   Although I don't want her to work until she is comfortable with the culture and also we have imidiate family planning because of my age, I'm guessing it will be beneficial for her to go to the university and take the courses or test out if they will allow her to. I'm not sure if she will need to do SAT like young college students do. If she is pregnant School it something to keep her busy.

 

Thank you for the replies! ^^

When I told her that the US wouldn't recognize her degree and she may have to get back into school, she sounded excited at first but was very quiet about it. It makes me feel bad because she's worked so hard to get where she's at now. She has the opportunity to take on one of two job offers later this year. One she talked about would require her to travel all over Vietnam and aboard. I was very happy for her, but my stomach sank at the same time. I'm going to look into getting my degree in Computer Information Systems online. I don't have the luxury of going to an actual college being as I have to work full time at my job to maintain my house, pay bills and take care of my daughter. I'm really not sure what the future will bring for us. mellow.png


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-08-02 20:27:00
VietnamQuestion regarding foreign degrees and working in the US.
My girlfriend has a Master's degree in Linguistics. She works at a university mainly and travels to other schools as needed. She loves education and learning as well as teaching children. She has also mentioned owning a coffee shop together. Now I know from reading up on the K-1 Visa process, the beneficiary can't work right away until their status has been changed, correct? Since she has a degree from Saigon, would the US even recognize this? Or would she be able to get the degree transferred from a US university? I just would some feedback on this so I can give my girlfriend some options and something to think about.
TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-08-02 05:17:00
VietnamHome Preps to ease Cultural Differences

I did something to help her with this awful wait time last week, her friends from work were saving for a trip to Malaysia/singapore/indonesia 7 days tour. so they couldn't go eat with her after work. Her life is on hold wating on the uscis papers.... anyway, I suggested she go with them and well I had to talk her into it citing it would probably be the last time she got to do that with her friends. I sent her a little money and really bought her some happiness to break up the time waiting. I told her to take lots of photos to upload to FB and make some fun memories with her friends. It also made me feel better knowing it made her happy. This may not be a prep but it certainly is something mentally good to help with the long wait time.

That was a good idea! This is something I will consider myself, though my girl likes to drown herself with work all the time as opposed to going out with friends. She said the only person she cares about is her mother. That was a very considerate thing you did for her. Little things like this will go a long way. :)


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-08-01 13:01:00
VietnamHome Preps to ease Cultural Differences

 

Ha ha well that is one advantage of marrying a man from a western country. We don't expect the woman to know how cook or to cook every meal. We are use to woman not cooking in our culture. So she should be happy about that!!

 

Does she like American food? I know my wife's enjoys some things but not all. The rest of her family pretty much hates American food. I remember talking my wife's family out for American food and they all thought it was the worst ever. Very funny experience.

 

Hopefully she likes American food somewhat. Luckily in the U.S. it is pretty easy to eat pretty much any style of food you want.

What is classified as American food anymore? Burgers and fries? Haha! I have several Vietnamese restaurants near me as well as a HUGE international grocery store. I do believe there is an Asian market somewhere here, but I'm not sure. The only things I know she eats now is Chicken Fried Rice, Instant Noodles and Pasta (which I can make). I would honestly give up American food. I love Korean and Vietnamese food. The last thing I want to do when I go see my girlfriend during Tet is eat American food. :P


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-20 12:52:00
VietnamHome Preps to ease Cultural Differences

Hmmmmmmm....what is it so rare? do you expect all Vietnamese girls/females  born with a wok attached to their hands? or better yet been force to learn how to  cook ,serve and please their future  husbands/men? man, you are stuck in the 19th Century,this is the new Vietnam and has being for the longest time and changing by minutes.

Actually, a lot of Vietnamese men expect the women to be good cooks. My girlfriend was afraid to tell me at first because she was afraid I would not like her anymore. The thing is, I don't mind it at all. :)


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-20 10:34:00
VietnamHome Preps to ease Cultural Differences

I have often thought about how different things would be for my girl. She doesn't know how to cook, but keeps her room very tidy. I can barely cook anything except pasta, which she loves. I was thinking her and I can take some cooking classes together. I always see this in Korean dramas with couples who are getting married. :)

My only issue is my house is small. It's a one bedroom house and my daughter has the bedroom. My daughter is only here 3 days a week. I have a really nice sofa bed out in the living room, but I know she'd prefer for us to have a bedroom. I could turn the basement into a bedroom, but I don't know if that'd be worth the money. I've already tried to sell this house once and the people who seemed interested just laughed after they heard it was a one bedroom. We've talked about kids in the future, so this house won't cut it. dry.png


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-07-19 08:41:00
VietnamOnline program to learn English in Vietnam

I recently found this site, http://www.goenglish.me

I appreciate you sharing this! My girlfriend needs to improve her English as well. After Tet holiday, we were going to enroll her in English classes but this seems better suited for her. Thanks a bunch! ^^


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-11-06 15:31:00
VietnamVisa fee for tourist visa

There are two ways to obtain visa:

1) Leaf visa which is required the copy of your passport.
2) Send the passport to Embassy.


You can ask for fast service which costa you 30 dollar more. What did you mean your passport isnt here yet? You meant you dont have passport to send to Embassy? It usually takes 5 business days to get your visa including shipping time.





 

Yes, I am waiting for my passport to arrive so I can send it out. If I have to pay extra, I will. Well, if it takes only about 5 days for processing/shipping then I'm okay. My buddy who is going with me has already received his passport and he wanted to wait until I had mine before sending his. So many things I still have to do for my trip though. Thank you for the information.

Let us know when you receive the Visa, ConGau1981. At least I would like to know. Hehe.


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-11-15 10:30:00
VietnamVisa fee for tourist visa

Thanks for the informations, y'all. My concern is I'm leaving for Vietnam on January 26th, 2014 and my passport isn't here yet. Now I know I need the passport to get my Visa. Am I running out of time or is there a service I can use to help obtain my Visa fast? This is my first visit to Vietnam so I'm a newbie at this. :(


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-11-15 07:49:00
VietnamBringing 2 new iPads to Vietnam as gifts, plus an old personal one, would there be any problems?

I'm leaving for Vietnam very soon and bringing gifts. I thought about taking everything out of the boxes they come in and put them in separate little bags to give to each person. I'm taking 2 perfume bottles (2.2 oz and 3.4oz), 2 wallets, razor and shave gel with replacement blades, hydrated lotion (8oz) and a makeup kit. The razor and replacement blades would the only thing I would not open and for all they know, they could be for me. Arriving in Saigon at 10:30PM after on a plane for so long, I really hope I have no issues. I'll use the $5 passport trick if I need to. mellow.png


TighfieldMaleVietnam2014-01-16 01:35:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

That's awesome - Wishing you all the best!

 

Which area did you visit?  and what did you like best?

 

 

Thanks! ^^

 

I visited Saigon and Da Lat. Da Lat was chilly at night. I froze in my hotel room. Da Lat was very beautiful at night. What I like best was the coffee shops. I find that I drink too much coffee in America to get my fix. Vietnamese coffee is so different and really good. One or two cups and I'm happy. :)


TighfieldMaleVietnam2014-02-19 07:49:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

Sorry guys, I have been rather busy since I came back home. Everything went great! Far greater than I ever could have expected. The flight over there was mind numbing, but completely worth it. Vietnam is a beautiful country indeed. My girlfriend and I hit it off really well and had lots of fun. My buddy had more fun than ever could have expected and made a connection with one of my girlfriend's friends. :)

It's really hard to describe the connection my girlfriend and I have now that we have met. Her siblings like me and her parents like me. I met a few of her friends and they are just really cool humble people. They all accept our relationship. Going to Vietnam during Tet was truly awesome and I'm glad I experienced it. After the first day or two, I started to feel really comfortable. Having lunch with my girlfriend's family was great too. Though I am not much of a drinker, I tried to entertain them. And my girlfriend had to step in and tell her uncles to lighten up, that I don't like alcohol that much. :)

We talked a lot before, but now I don't ever seem to skip a minute without talking to her. We Skype as much as we can and I enrolled her into English classes with a private teacher. It is just one of those things that when you know it feels right, go with it. And this feels right. We've had many conversations about where our relationship will go now. I will see her again this September for 2 weeks this time. We plan on visiting her parents and going to Nha Trang. So thus, everything went very well and hopefully soon I will join the ranks of those who must go through the whole visa process. :)




TighfieldMaleVietnam2014-02-17 08:21:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...
Not leaving until the 26th. :P
TighfieldMaleVietnam2014-01-16 22:47:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

That's why he's tagging along :)


Could be why he is getting excited about going and not sleeping much over it. Haha! But he agreed to go long before all this. I think for him, he just wants to get away from it all for a bit. I was teasing him eariler today saying "So you're coming to the wedding?" He's like "No! I can't afford another trip!" But I know he would just to stare at the pretty girls. Haha!

TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-12-14 00:45:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

Women can change men :) It's some sort of...sorcery.


He went through a terrible breakup with a girl this year that lasted way longer than it should have. I mean, he seems to think my girlfriend's sister is cute, but he has told me before that he cannot even fathom doing what I'm doing.

TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-12-14 00:36:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

I hope your friend doesn't ####### block you :). Gl and have fun.


He has no interest in Asian girls. He only is going for the experience and support. :)

Dont freak your freak. Have a safe trip!


Thanks! ^^




TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-12-14 00:31:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

He cannot file for anything until he at least see her face-to-face.

You do realize that many people only meet once, then file successfully for the K-1, right?

Furthermore, he is not asking about a CR1. How is he going to marry her without meeting face-to-face???????

I don't think 9 months is jumping the gun. Time moves regardless of when they meet and the time frame does not change for the K-1 process. Also, the OP did not ask if his plan is "jumping the gun." He hasn't even file anything. All he wants to do is meet her face-to-face. You pointing out the K-1 is faster than the CR-1 is jumping the gun. For heaven sake, they haven't even met.

For you it's not worth it. You are not the rest of the world. A week may be enough for many people.

All he wants to do is go meet her. Do you think he should continue the relationship on line for 6 months before he goes? What's the difference?

For the OP, maybe a week now is better than 2 weeks a year from now. You don't know and neither do I.











 

Thanks, Aaron. This thread was really only about meeting face to face. Thank you for understanding that. When I first made this post, I had concerns. I had read an article about a backpacker who traveled to Vietnam and was treated poorly because he would not spend a lot of money. Bar girls would try to overcharge him and many people who work street carts would turn him away. Another article came from stickmanweekly.com. Most of those are stories from Thailand, but there are a few stories from Vietnam. An Aussie man gets involved with a Vietnamese girl and she turns out to be a mafia girl. Very crazy story. But after the positive feedback I have gotten and communicating with some trusted friends, I took a step back and realized that I was indeed freaking myself out. This is my first time flying and first time overseas. A lot of new experiences are going to happen. So instead of focusing on the bad, I am going to enjoy myself and my time with my girlfriend. :)

 

I was only asking him why he's going for only 1 week and I, in my opinion said it's not worth it. I didn't ask YOU to respond for him. He didn't say anything about the K1 Visa, not sure why you brought it up. If you think he's planning for a K1 visa and that's the reason he's meeting her for only 1 week then it is jumping the gun in to marriage.

 

My buddy is going with me and he only wishes to stay a week. My original plan was to stay 2 1/2 to 3 weeks. One week is just fine because then I can go again later in the year. I do not have the luxury to go for as long as I want. At the moment, I only get 2 weeks paid vacation at work. I cannot afford to take an unpaid vacation. I have a daughter to take of. But thanks Sparth for warding off DreamNHope. Kudos.

As far as what I am doing and why, I don't wish to share it. There is either someone who belongs to this site that has revealed information to people who do not need to know or something else. I will only provide information as it happens and of course, share my trips to Vietnam. But that's it. Sorry guys.


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-12-13 21:51:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

 
Incomplete statement. When marrying someone in the US, after the marriage, you two just live your lives happily forever (hopefully). And then after the divorce, if any, just pay up the associated cost of the procedure, then move on.
 
But if you're married to a Vnese, one of the following (possible more or all of the above for some people) things will HAPPEN:
 
1) You'll be married to her ENTIRE family, meaning once she gets here, expect to continue supporting her family (sending money to support them indefinitely). She will come back to VN more often than your bank account would like to (and you don't have a saying in that either. Either go along with her plan to keep her happy or else (see the second sentence of this reply)
 
2) After she's become a USC, expect to continue to deal with the USCIS because she will start to file petition to sponsor her family to come here (don't forget if she can't come back to see them, some of them will come over here to see her. Expect room and boarding and short term health insurance for those relatives)
 
3) In the unfortunate event you get divorced, expect to travel to VN to see your children (if you two have any together). She will bring them back to VN and use them as leverage to squeeze money outta you!
 
So it's NOT as cut and dry as you think!
 
Welcome to the game. BE PREPARED TO PAY dearly!













Thanks for the rather grim outlook but who pissed in your Cheerios? Your comments seem rather bitter like you've been hurt in the past. Much like a scorned woman. I know marrying a Vietnamese woman is not all unicorns and rainbows but everyone is not going to have the same experience as you. It is much like a game of chance. Hell, life itself is like a game of chance. I agree with Sparth, grow up.

TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-12-13 14:23:00
VietnamI could be freaking myself out...

Follow your guts. How did you 2 meet. I met mine through close friends and her family is their parents so I'm safer. Follow her actions. Reason to yourself about how she talk. If you feel like she's just want to leave VN and go to US then you might want to asset the situation. When you 2 meet, it'll be awkward at first but be yourself. Express your feelings to her and see if the chemistry is correct when she returns her feelings. The way she talks, dresses, actions...etc can very well portrait what a person she is. When you live with her you'll know. During intimate nights, will she be a pro or amature, ask her about everything...past relationships...etc. You're about to spend a lifetime with a person, make sure you get it out before it's too late so share. It's really hard for me to trust mine at first even though she said things that only a nice human being can say so it was hard to believe. But when I got to know her, I can't believe all those are true and how lucky I am to have her in my life. But I follow my guts and that's the most gifted things God gave us so use it and you won't be disappointed. You will know who's fake and who's not. You will fight, you will make up. You will say mean things, but in the end, it should end like a fairy tail story and that's what love is.

 

Most unsucess stories are just like Vegas stories. You go on a vacation, you meet, you get married and divorce the next day. It's typical. If you are meeting her to see how it goes, you might not want to think too far of the relationship. You're meeting her so you can meet her family, understand her lifestyle and hopefully you get to know for who she is face to face. I hope things go well with you. I'll be in VN again in Jan and I've been more excited everyday, more than the first time I saw her.

 

Thank you for the taking the time to reply to my post. I have not had a lot of positive feedback lately. My family and some other people around me wish to be negative about my situation. I know in my heart this is real and I know she feels it too. Her and I have had very deep conversations about it. But at the same time, I will not drop my guard and I will be ready. I'm more ready to go to Vietnam than ever before. Life is too short to live in fear. I lost my grandfather and my uncle in the same month this year and it was a wake up call for me. My parents may not believe this is real. My friend's family may think I'm crazy, but I must do this. After this, I can cross it off my bucket list and rest for awhile.


TighfieldMaleVietnam2013-12-12 04:15:00