ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
I feel you on this one. This is where Air Jamaica comes in. There are some lines you do not cross. Trust is a vital part of any relationship. We have a saying in the islands "Monkey's know which trees to climb." Craig knows you will rant and rave but you will never want to admit that you know he is being dishonest and take action on it. I am not sure the extent of the relationship, but it suggest to me that he has not matured enough to understand what an exclusive relationship means. It means that he has to take the responsibility to set that woman straigh. That is not your job. I see women get into fights with other women over men. Do not get yourself to that point where you have to set a woman straight about your man. It may be a flirtatious thing, him liking the attention and I would have gone with that for a while. But you see that line about the friend at work putting him on her family plan, that is a slap in the face. It is insulting, demeaning, it smacks of lack of respect. You are already pissed about the phone number and he pulls some ###### like that?

I am not sure there is enough left to salvage here. The disrespect is just unacceptable and he is not getting the picture. He is working, therefore he could afford a ticket back home or he could afford to stay here on his own. Unfortumnately that is a call he would have to make. But the call you have to make at this time is how soon does he leave. Do not get into the pissing match with the girlfriend, or the explanations from him. You know what is happening. Your man is disrespecting you and he is trying to make a fool of you. Treat him like you would any man who is cheating. Visa or no visa, this is a straight forward case.
[/quote]


THANK YOU !!!! I've never gotten into a fight with another woman over my man....I just kicked his butt to the curb.

Now, I wonder what I can do, we haven't even filed for AOS. I just spoke with my client that works for immigration and she says she sees this ALL of the time. I emailed my lawyer to ask if I can get an anulment. Do I do this on my own, like would "I" need Craig to be there for any divorce/anulment proceedings????

Again, please keep the info coming!!!!!!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-10-12 08:47:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)


NEW TOPIC .......

Okay, how do "I" handle, take or whatever THIS situation ???????????? I would LOVE to get Trin (or any guys)... point of view as well !!!

Sorry to say, I just do NOT trust Craig (great for a marriage, huh?)!!!.....because he just continues to lie (which he doesn't *think* is a lie) ....anyway, I went in his pants pocket last night and there was a phone number ....her name is SWEETS. So I called it (..blocked my number, just to verify it was a chic) and it was. Then there was also the number of the other "friend" which I guess "I" hoped (even though I KNOW it hasn't been) taken care of. So I started to wash the "dark" clothes and I said, Craig would you like me to wash the jeans that you've been wearing all week? and he says, yeah that would be good and I said, don't forget to clean out your pockets (I had the 2 numbers in MY pocket) and then "I" turn "B" on him and he's like what's wrong.........so I say something about this girls number in his pocket. HE SAYS, she slipped in in there!!!!!!!!! My son was still awake and I did EVERYthing in my power NOT to go postal on him !!!!!!!!! I said, we'll talk when Austin goes to sleep. So we did, NOT pretty. This is a girl he's been working with.............I was like YOU are a GROWN man, WHEN she gave you the number, you should have handed it back and said, no thank you!!!!!

SO, my question to you all.............should "I" be upset that he has a girls number because she's a co-worker??? I mean I'm not being naive about this. Trust me, I'm at my boiling point. Should "I" call her and ask to what extent their relationship is?? Should "I" be pissed? Do I just let it go?? Does Craig REALLY "need" to make friends with a woman and someone that "I" don't know??? I have a TON of guy friends, but....he's met EVERY one of them and that was within the 1st week of him being here !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've now taken away his cell phone (which was an extra pre-paid phone my son lent him) because I don't TRUST the phone calls that are being made, received, etc. I told him last night, if "he" WANTS a "real" phone..........than GO AND BUY YOUR OWN !!!! He told me that someone at work (a female) was going to put him on HER family plan and I was like, nooooooooo YOU go and GET your OWN phone !!!!!

He STILL continues to say that the other chic is a "friend".....don't believe him there either.

I told him that this relationship is a TOTAL joke because he does NOT respect me OR my son. That HE is the one f-g up MY LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!

Please chime in EVERYONE ...........how would YOU GUYS handle this situation ???!!!

Thanks!

Frustrated, pissed, ready to LOSE my mind, etc etc etc I'm TRYING to keep that "happy face" in front of my son, because if he sees me pissed off at Craig, those that have kids know, they go into PROTECT mommy mode !!!!!


First of all good morning!! I'm going to make this as brief as possible, because to me, it really isn't that complicated. I believe that you already know what's going on with your man....we women always do, but for one reason or another we always want to second-guess ourselves or come up with a variety of excuses to try and explain away this obviously deceitful and wrong behavior. I, personally, believe your man is stepping out...and although it may not be a physical thing YET, it is still stepping out. He's accepting phone numbers from women at work, and he still hasn't respected you or your son enough to tell the chic that's in NY to stop calling. Period. He's married, and he's GOT to do better. There are no excuses for this kind of behavior. If the girl at work really is a friend, then why hasn't he said, "Hey baby, I met this new girl at work today and she seems really cool or something" (not that that would fly too well with me either, but at least he wouldn't be hiding) I know if it were me, the whole chic from NY thing would have ended our relationship if he hadn't dealt with it in the matter that I thought was appropriate. If he sees something is bothering you that much and hurting you that much, then why wouldn't he do everything in his power to see that it is stopped because you are the queen in his life and the one that means the most to him in this world. Personally, I just don't deal with cheating or lying of ANY kind. I have no tolerance for it. But I am not in your situation, and we may handle things in different ways. Honestly though, if your gut tells you that he's being shady...then he is...but what are YOU going to do about it? What kind of message is this sending to your son? Although he may not be in the same room when you guys are talking about these things, believe me he knows what's going on. I am a therapist that works with kids, and they ALWAYS know, no matter how much you try and keep it behind your bedroom doors, or how you try and wait until they go to sleep. And being a child growing up in a household whose parents "waited" until my sister and I were asleep to have their fights, let me just tell you that we were NOT asleep! Craig is living in your house and being the "father" to your son....is he providing the example of how a man should behave and how a man should treat a woman that you would want him to? Is your son learning how a man should respect and treat women from your husband? You and your son's well-being are your top priority (or should be at least). If I were you, I would seriously consider how detrimental this relationship is being to you AND your son both mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. If it is not uplifting and making your lives better, then actions must be taken...SOONER rather than later...



[color=#6666CC]
THANK YOU for being honest, upfront, etc etc.....!! I'm going to show him that "I" am not crazy.

I KNOW that I do NOT want to be in this relationship and have told him time and time again, IF this situation was different (him living here), he'd be WAY gone by now !!!!!! I've given MY all and he's given NOTHING!!! I'm going to contact my friend who is a lawyer today.

My son, truly does NOT know!!! He was WAY asleep when we were talking. He has NO idea that there's anything to do with another woman, but he does see how disrespectful he is, but I don't say....oh, it will be okay, I fight back and TELL HIM in front of my son, that your behavior is unacceptable on EVERY level!!!!

So would you call the girl from work????????? or leave it at that???

KEEP the advice...and opinions COMING!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-10-12 08:26:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
NEW TOPIC .......

Okay, how do "I" handle, take or whatever THIS situation ???????????? I would LOVE to get Trin (or any guys)... point of view as well !!!

Sorry to say, I just do NOT trust Craig (great for a marriage, huh?)!!!.....because he just continues to lie (which he doesn't *think* is a lie) ....anyway, I went in his pants pocket last night and there was a phone number ....her name is SWEETS. So I called it (..blocked my number, just to verify it was a chic) and it was. Then there was also the number of the other "friend" which I guess "I" hoped (even though I KNOW it hasn't been) taken care of. So I started to wash the "dark" clothes and I said, Craig would you like me to wash the jeans that you've been wearing all week? and he says, yeah that would be good and I said, don't forget to clean out your pockets (I had the 2 numbers in MY pocket) and then "I" turn "B" on him and he's like what's wrong.........so I say something about this girls number in his pocket. HE SAYS, she slipped in in there!!!!!!!!! My son was still awake and I did EVERYthing in my power NOT to go postal on him !!!!!!!!! I said, we'll talk when Austin goes to sleep. So we did, NOT pretty. This is a girl he's been working with.............I was like YOU are a GROWN man, WHEN she gave you the number, you should have handed it back and said, no thank you!!!!!

SO, my question to you all.............should "I" be upset that he has a girls number because she's a co-worker??? I mean I'm not being naive about this. Trust me, I'm at my boiling point. Should "I" call her and ask to what extent their relationship is?? Should "I" be pissed? Do I just let it go?? Does Craig REALLY "need" to make friends with a woman and someone that "I" don't know??? I have a TON of guy friends, but....he's met EVERY one of them and that was within the 1st week of him being here !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've now taken away his cell phone (which was an extra pre-paid phone my son lent him) because I don't TRUST the phone calls that are being made, received, etc. I told him last night, if "he" WANTS a "real" phone..........than GO AND BUY YOUR OWN !!!! He told me that someone at work (a female) was going to put him on HER family plan and I was like, nooooooooo YOU go and GET your OWN phone !!!!!

He STILL continues to say that the other chic is a "friend".....don't believe him there either.

I told him that this relationship is a TOTAL joke because he does NOT respect me OR my son. That HE is the one f-g up MY LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!

Please chime in EVERYONE ...........how would YOU GUYS handle this situation ???!!!

Thanks!

Frustrated, pissed, ready to LOSE my mind, etc etc etc I'm TRYING to keep that "happy face" in front of my son, because if he sees me pissed off at Craig, those that have kids know, they go into PROTECT mommy mode !!!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-10-12 06:23:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
I just went to breakfast with my best friend. She said she had been thinking about me a lot. I haven't talked to her about the problems before because - I guess I was embarassed. She told me that she wanted me to be happy - and she would stick with me through anything. But she also said that I deserve more - much more - and she dosen't think I should settle.

You are right about feeling bad because your man left all he knew in JA. I keep thinking of how proud he is and how embarassing it would be for him to go back. I worry about his health, his teeth, and how he will feel going back to a life of such poverty. I love him so very much. But I know that I need to love myself more.

Ever since he came here things have been bad. My house is a mess - my Pergo floors are ruined - by window broke, my small stained glass window ornament is broken... My girlfriend says it is because I am "out of order" (she is referring to God's plan for my life - I am currently living in sin, etc.). I am not overly religious, but I do love God and I totally see her point.

He started his new job today. We went to get him a pair of black pants last night. The guy bought him the Dockers and I told him he should try it on. He was like "I can't boder with trying on nutten now man, believe me...". I told him he really needs to since he is starting the job in the morning and he won't have a seocond chance to find a pair that fits. He sucks his teeth and mutters under his breath and storms off to the fitting room. The salesman looks at me. I look down. I am embarassed - not just in how he treats me, but that I am engaged to a child. :( When we were checking out he starts telling the guy to hurry because he is hungry. And he says: "Me hungry man, believe me, a hungry man is an angry man..." I was like "WHAT"? But I said that in my head because I didn't want to argue and I wanted to get the heck away from the sales man as soon as possible.

Ladies, I barely even want to have s*x anymore. Are you allowed to say that here? Anyway, I certainly won't get into the details - but suffice to say that things are much LESS fun than they were in JA. Not saying things are NEVER fun, but nothing like before.

So I'm here - in a messy house with broken stuff... I've been embarassed in front of a jillion people (my Dad visited from Texas last week and at 7:30 p.m. when we were all watching TV he announces that he is tired and actually lays out on the floor in my sister's house and starts to go to sleep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). The romance is all but gone. And I feel like a fool.

At this point I really think he needs to go back to JA. So why am I having such a hard time just saying that to him? :unsure:

I went to his job today to give him some money and I just looked at how incredibly handsome he is. He was so proud to be working. And he told me the reason he needed money is because he opened a bank account and couldn't take it out today. And whenever I see these tiny rays of hope I think - maybe I should give it more time... maybe I'm being too hasty.... And it breaks my heart to see him and be thinking in my head that I've all but decided not to marry him.

Well - enjoy the rest of your Saturday ladies.......

Take care
T


T, I think that once he's working and really gets into the swing of things that will help him.....just to see and FEEL how things "outside the home" work on his own. Craig likes to take the 2 hour (only 20 min by driving to work), because it makes him feel independent. When we're out, I'm constantly helping Craig "say" things, or the polite way to say things is....he can be VERY rude and I'm in TOTAL shock because he was NEVER like that in Jamaica!!!

I was just updating Craig's resume and he said he's been checking out jobs (because he's getting laid off in 2 weeks) and I asked, what are you wearing to "check these jobs out" and he's like, what I have on from work ...which is jeans (some holey) and I was like you HAVE to dress to impress even if it's for a warehouse position. You don't *have* to overdress, but wearing nice Khaki's .... he was like, other guys wear....and I said, listen to me Craig and NOT your homey's !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shauna you've been on my mind ALL day!!! We said a likkle prayer for ya this morning ....

Today is MUCH better of a day. The 3 of us are chilling. Austin and Craig have been outside playin soccer, now they are sitting on the porch just shootin the s**t. It's NICE .....to see that, it truly is !!!! We've ALL been gettin along today like it's SUPPOSED to !!!! Craig said, lets go grocery shopping....I almost fell over!

Have a nice rest of the day.... and a nice Monday off (for those that have off) :D
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-10-07 14:33:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'

Thank you you all for the replies.

We have talked about several times and for the most part my little ones are fine. I never ignore it when it comes up I do correct them if I see anything, I know it takes time, but I want it to stop. After finally getting my daughter to talk to me yesterday. Kelly you are right I am sure that most of this because of her age. She feels that the break up was all my fault, she feels sorry for for her father blah, blah...He lives in a one bed room blah blah..He trying blah working, he misses you blah blah. He's wroking blah blah. David feels that I sugar coat things when it comes to her so I told her flat out why I left, how things are and how things are going to be. Again that disrespect will not tolerated. David states that he is "uncomfortable" telling her what to do and she rolls her eyes ect. and not to over react he just won't discipline her at all. He assure me that he is not going any where but doesn't want to say anything that her father will overreact to. I have given him acceptable ways to discipline her if I am not there to deal with her and she know what they are. Have no problem with him discipline the other two, He even spanks the smallest one, she has the nerve to tell me she feels the he should not be hitting him, I put her in her place right away. :angry: So I think we made lots of progress yesterday :yes:

Something David said did that kind of bothered me. When my daughter said that her father was working and "trying to help" so to speak he laughed, you know, to show disbelief calling her father a workless mon bela, bela well my daughter started crying even more. I tried to tell him that this did not help the situation at all. :unsure: In Ja we do this blah and blah. We don't allow out chidren to blah blah, I would have knocked my daughter on her backside by now blah blah :unsure: My daughter has never been a problem child and hasn't gotten very many spankings ect. so I don't feel comfortable breaking out the belt now and beating them (her) for every thing....hopefully our family talk helped :huh: I will continue to pray about it, It will one day pass.

Sorry so longs thanks again for the replies.

:ot2: How do you track your AOS online ;)


Dee, it will all work out, it truly is JUST a phase and I'm sooooooooooo serious when I say it's the age!!! The pre-teen HORMONAL age is driving me absolutely NUTS!!! I don't spank my son, a swift smack across the back of the head within the last 2 yrs and I can count on 3 fingers how many x that's happened....works! Thank god it's only me and I don't have the back and forth with the sperm donor!! What she really reeeeally needs is a girls day out. Say to her, okay...tomorrow or the next day blah blah we're setting some time for US, me and you, that's it and the days on YOU and commit to it. We can get our nails done or have lunch (or dinner) ...whatever YOU want to do (within reason). My son and I have like "date nights" just mommy and me time (although we're with each other 24/7), but it's just noooooo stress...time to talk, catch up, etc etc. I took him out to dinner last night and we just chatted and chatted. It's nice to re-group every now and them and make THEM feel THAT special. Today he's been such a giggle pot and just having a really really great day. Puts a smile on my face.

For you mommies to be, I wish I could have my little baby back in a heartbeat !!! Once they hit middle school.....dear lord, give us ALL some strength!!!

If you ever need to vent....please feel free to call or email.

Have a great weekend everyone and a safe and wonderful holiday.

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-04-14 13:05:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'

:ot: :ot: :help: :help:

Any comments will help.

Lately I find when I have to leave the kids home with David, they run over him. in other words are not obeying his orders, for instance if he tells them ( mainly my 12 year old daughter) to clean their room ,take a bath, wash dishes ect. esp after they have been to see their Father. David and I had a conversation this morning and he basically said that he doesn't feel comfortable living in a house where the children do not mind :huh: . For the most part my children fear me and will do what I ask the second or third time at least :wacko: I'm not sure what I'm asking, but I don't want to be too hard on my children because I feel that they have gone through a lot in the past few months, Right now I feel like hanging the oldest one cause she just doesn't listen. I told her to clean the kitchen before I left for work, he told her again, again her excuse was she needed to do her homework, the same homework that she told me was complete before I left. So David is saying that he is backing off because he doesn't want confrontation form their father, he feels that he must be telling them not to obey him as it happens, like a said when they have been around him. I just want everyone to get along. It's not so bad for the boys, they are okay for the most part, but the other day my three year old said, "Jeffrey didn't have a home and now he dose", I'm like where did that come from?? I love this man so much, he is trying so hard and I want my children to see him for the man that their father is not. :( :( I don't like to see him hurting because of this, I feel like I'm protecting them from each other. I think it's beginning to affect how he treats my children, the same day he caught my daughter rolling her eyes, he told her not to look at him like that, that he has a daughter as old as she and she doesn't disrespect him like that and neither would she. :crying: I say nothing a pray that this will pass, but it keeps coming up...Anyways this is getting long, I think ya'll know where I'm coming from.I was open to any suggestions or comments anyone may or may not have. Things were going so good, I'm sure that it will pass but it scared me when he said he not comfortable, well, how do you think I feel :unsure:


Dee, don't worry to much....trust me it's the age!!! My son is 12 1/2 and does NOT listen or follow directions. Ya gotta jack her (them) up a bit and put your foot down. Have a heart to heart...maybe girls day out and then maybe a "family meeting" of how to respect and what to expect. Keeping the lines of communication open are key....but seriously, this too shall pass. I wish it would pass SOON !! This age is killin me right now.

Keep your chin up :thumbs: - I know for a fact that I'll go through the same thing. :(
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-04-13 22:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
[quote name='Dee&Dav' date='Apr 5 2006, 04:47 PM' post='113634']
I don't know the itinerary yet...the Jamaica Tourist Board is sending them out soon. The actual show is in Negril on Apr 25th and I believe we'll have a "free" night that night, but won't know for sure. I'm also going to see if I can extend my trip a day. I'll let you know when I know. I'll also be in Montego Bay, but don't know if that will be the 1st day or the last 2 days? With these travel agent trips, we're doing site inspections of different hotels --so that we can come back and sell the properties. The trips are alot of fun...but you can't beat $199.00 for 3 nights, includes airfare, hotel, transfers, all meals and drinks !!
[/quote]

Okay....Now how do I become a travel agent ;) I actually had a lady call me about starting my own business as a travel agent. I haven't returned her call, maybe I should :P
[/quote]


Well for starters, you need a very large client base that will also provide you referrals. It's a very challenging business--because of the ups and downs and there are down times, at least 2 to 3 a year. I've been in the travel industry for 16 yrs 1/2 years now and a travel agent 11 of those years and have an extremely large *committed* client base and each week I'm getting at least 7-10 referrals from my existing clients. If you ever need any information, I'll be happy to provide it. It's extremely easy to "startup", at least here in Maryland you don't need a business license.

It does have it's perks though !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-04-06 06:50:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'



Congrats Joanna- May 9th will be here before you know it :yes:
Eric your time is just about here and I'm thinking of you and your wife.
Mrs. Squitto-hopefully everything will be resolved today.
Tenika have a great trip and a successful interview!
Dee and Dave- hopefully everything will work out with his daughter (L)
Anna-good to see you and congratulations to everyone on their weightloss :thumbs: .
Lee- you already know :star:
Good evening everyone.

Michele (F)



DITTO to everyone !!!

Well, we (me and my son) are definitely not going down to JA for spring break, a little bummed......but....I just found out about an hour ago that I got confirmed for a travel agent trip to Montego Bay/Negril for April 24-27th. I'm WAY psyched !! I requested another month for our case and it was granted. They seem to reply back to my emails quickly? So time is ticking....

Who is going to Jamaica ? Where is everyone staying ? and what dates will those that are heading to JA be going ?

Kelly


Hey Kelly,

I'll be in Negril the 19th to the 26th. When will you be in Negril?



I don't know the itinerary yet...the Jamaica Tourist Board is sending them out soon. The actual show is in Negril on Apr 25th and I believe we'll have a "free" night that night, but won't know for sure. I'm also going to see if I can extend my trip a day. I'll let you know when I know. I'll also be in Montego Bay, but don't know if that will be the 1st day or the last 2 days? With these travel agent trips, we're doing site inspections of different hotels --so that we can come back and sell the properties. The trips are alot of fun...but you can't beat $199.00 for 3 nights, includes airfare, hotel, transfers, all meals and drinks !!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-04-05 15:18:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'

Congrats Joanna- May 9th will be here before you know it :yes:
Eric your time is just about here and I'm thinking of you and your wife.
Mrs. Squitto-hopefully everything will be resolved today.
Tenika have a great trip and a successful interview!
Dee and Dave- hopefully everything will work out with his daughter (L)
Anna-good to see you and congratulations to everyone on their weightloss :thumbs: .
Lee- you already know :star:
Good evening everyone.

Michele (F)



DITTO to everyone !!!

Well, we (me and my son) are definitely not going down to JA for spring break, a little bummed......but....I just found out about an hour ago that I got confirmed for a travel agent trip to Montego Bay/Negril for April 24-27th. I'm WAY psyched !! I requested another month for our case and it was granted. They seem to reply back to my emails quickly? So time is ticking....

Who is going to Jamaica ? Where is everyone staying ? and what dates will those that are heading to JA be going ?

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-04-04 18:59:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
[quote name='jkb919' date='Mar 16 2006, 11:40 AM' post='78895']
[quote name='luvtravlin' post='78592' date='Mar 16 2006, 08:31 AM']
Is there a blank form of the DS230 listed on a website somewhere? Or does anyone have a copy that you can fax to me or email me a copy ?? I'm trying to help Craig fill out his information and it's frustrating to say the least (as you all know).

Thanks !

Kelly
[/quote]


Hey Kelly,
Look under "Examples Forms" here on the VJ site and you can get a copy of the DS230 form...it is a fillible forms that is where I got Adrains form from....Hope this helps

Hello everyone else, I am going to do my bridal registry today at Bed Bath and Beyond, I dont need too much but there are a few things we could use, my friend is throwing me a bridal shower at the end of April, she wants to have it before Adrian gets here so I dont have to leave him alone, while I go have a party.

So will chat later, Joanna


Thanks Joanna--to be honest, I haven't had time to "research"....I filled it out and I'm going to send it to him.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-16 15:56:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
Is there a blank form of the DS230 listed on a website somewhere? Or does anyone have a copy that you can fax to me or email me a copy ?? I'm trying to help Craig fill out his information and it's frustrating to say the least (as you all know).

Thanks !

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-16 08:31:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
Looks like a few of us will be in Jamaica within the next few weeks-from what I can recount:

Jill (ChrisineJames) [are you packed yet?]
Kelly (luvtravelin)
Michele (Jamaica to CT)
Dru (woogietail)
Eric (eric_drewey)
Jax (BelwinMills)
anybody else?


If I'm able to go....I don't know where they will be putting us and I'll be "working". Some of these trips don't allow us alot of down time. I'm going to work on the "sitter" part tomorrow, so that I can at least go on that trip.

We'll have to link up for those that will be in Negril !!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-15 21:31:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'


I don't know if I'm definitely going or not. Soccer was the issue, but now it alllll depends on Craig. Our case "expires" on April 15th....and if he stays true to his word, he's working on the stuff that HE needs to get done to help finish up this part of it.


Kelly -- April 15th is coming up pretty fast. Aren't you freaking out? I would be!! I don't want to get up in your personal business BUT :lol: -- when will you know if Craig is doing what he is suppose to do? What exactly do you have to file before your extension expires? Too much stress for me.....you are much stronger than I am!!!



Hey Mindy,

I'm not freakin out at all...just don't have time to be stressed about it. If we're meant to be, we will be...if not now, than definitely in the future. We both love each other very much and just know (and feel) we're meant to be together. As everyone knows, it is stressful and frustrating being so far away and not being able to hold their hands (literally) through this process. Craig is *supposed* to get the forms from I think it was packet 3 filled out, get a passport and get the Police Certificate and now that darn marriage certificate. I said to him last night that he needs to work quickly (US time, not JA time) !! to get that stuff done and if he wants this, us and our relationship as much as I do, than "he" HAS to do the next step....quickly. At this point, it's not up to me...cause I can't do the running around, so we shall see if he gets his rear in gear !!

If he doesn't, most likely no spring break trip for me and my son, I'll go on that travel agent trip and then we'll (me and my son) will go to the Dominican Republic in May or June. No sweat.

Plus you know....all of the BS I have to deal with from family.....that's another whole ball of ...argh to deal with !

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-15 16:48:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
Hi Kelly,

I'm not sure where the school is but I live near Mechanicsville. Which Sheraton are you staying at? The Marriott is very close to my house. I used to work next door to it.
[/quote]


Hi Ann,

We're staying at the Sheraton Park South--located:
9901 MIDLOTHIAN TURNPIKE
RICHMOND VA 23235

The Sheraton is about 25 min or so from the field, but it looks like a nice place and the price was right.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-15 16:35:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
Hey Kelly,

Are you going to JA in April, what date do you know yet?



Hey Dru,

I don't know if I'm definitely going or not. Soccer was the issue, but now it alllll depends on Craig. Our case "expires" on April 15th....and if he stays true to his word, he's working on the stuff that HE needs to get done to help finish up this part of it.

There is a travel agent trip to Negril on April 24th for 3 nights...it's $199.00 includes everything --hotel, airfare and all meals. I just need to work on who would watch my son.

I'm soooo flippin busy with the travel business and soccer and the part-time temp job has offered me a permanent part-time with VERY flexible (come and go) hours....that I just don't have enough time in the day to get everything done.

I haven't replied on this new site yet...I hope I did it right?!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-15 16:32:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
I'm taking a moment to breathe from work (can't catch up) and soccer practice. I wasn't staying out there in the windy cold weather. I hear ya about this crazy weather. I wore shorts yesterday --it was 85 degrees and have long pants and winter coat on today.....nuts !

Rhonda -- alot of my clients have stayed at Secrets (I had a group of 82 people stay there last year and the only complaint that I received was the waves were to big...like "I" had anything to do with that), but I sell tons and tons of Punta Cana. Other popular resorts that I sell alot of is Sunscape and the Iberostar properties--mostly Iberostar Bavaro or Iberostar Dominicana or the RIU properties. I have a small group going to the Ocean Blue in May.

Ann- Our field just got changed today (about 2 hours ago) because the field conditions are unplayable at the original field and now we are playing at Atlee High School #4 on Atlee Station Road in Mechanicsville, but I have to register the team in Glen Allen Friday night and we'll (me and my son) are going to be staying at the Sheraton in Richmond. I got an awesome travel agent rate of $39/night!! The team is staying at the Marriott downtown at $125/night. Being that my son is a guest player, we don't have to stay with the team. Next weekend we'll be in Manassas, but I'll be staying with friends in Lorton/Mason Neck. We have an 8:15am next Sunday, so I'm booking most of the team to spend Saturday night --in the Manassas area.

Are you familiar with where we're playing? We play at 9:30am (playing a team from New Jersey) and 3:30pm (playing a team from North Carolina) on Saturday and Sunday's games depends on how we do on Saturday, so I have no idea on the times yet. This tournament is huge, it's called the Jefferson Cup.

That would be very cool to meet up!!

Shemonya, I will touch base soon....I promise.

Dag Ten, I hope he's okay !!! That sucks when people feel the need to have to steal a kids bike!! I gotta remind my son alllll of the time to bring his bike in. We live in the front of the apartment...and ya never know.

Gotta run since I have some time to myself to play catchup !!

Have a great rest of the day/evening. :P

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-14 17:26:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'
Jus checking in. We had our 1st out-of-state soccer tournament in Virginia this weekend and the weather was absolutely beautiful. Our team didn't do so bad, considering we have 5 new players on our team. My son played in 6 games because our coach needed him as a guest player for our other team and we are both exhausted running around all part of Virginia all weekend. I took a nap when I got home and here it is
1 am and I can't sleep !

Congrat to everyone on their continuing cases, marriages, pregnancies, etc and to those that are in need of prayer...my thoughts are with you.

Rhonda that stinks that you guys got sick. I can't remember which hotel you stayed in, but I know it's was one that I've never sold to any clients before. What makes people sick in the Dominican Republic and Mexico is the water. You cannot even brush your teeth with it. Bottled water for everything !! The beaches are beautiful and the food was outstanding where we've stayed. Yes it's a spanish speaking country and there are some hotels that "cater" to the spanish speaking, not Americans. Punta Cana is the most requested destination that I sell, then Las Vegas.

I'm hoping and praying to head to Jamaica next month....just depends on our darn soccer schedule because we may be playing in yet another tournament. We have tournaments in Richmond Virginia and Manassas the next 2 weekends.

Have a great week everyone !

Kelly :D
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-03-13 01:13:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin'

It's certainly expected that as old journeys are completed and new ones are started that some will leave and some will come in. It is noted that some have been conspicuously absent of late and we miss you. We hope you're doing well, and if not, there's support here for you too. Things may not be as they were before but your input was and is still invaluable for those of us who are trying to determine if we can survive this crazy process, those in the midst of the process and new ones to come. I invite you to come back and join us, even if it's just to pop in and say hello, since we know that many lead busy lives; afterall that's what friends are for. Please don't forget the ties that bind us.

Michele (F)



Hi Everyone, I'm popping in to say hello and many many congrats to those....list is just way to long.

I had a heck of a time finding the link when it all changed over, but I checkin every now and then. I really don't have much to contribute, but do think of you guys and thank you to those that are still supportive, it means alot.

Gearing up for a trip to Jamaica in April with my son for his spring break. Looking forward to the much needed getaway. Business has been absolutely fantastic, which I'm happy that everyone's back to traveling again!

Take care and I hope I've posted this right..

:D Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-02-22 19:08:00
Mexico, Latin & South America*Off Topic*
Just curious.............how do your men shave their faces? With a shaver? clipper? or razor ? Do they do anything *special* to not have and/or get bumps?

Craig is driving me absolutely NUTS about shaving....cause he can't go to the "barber" to get a flippin shave (like he did in Jamaica)....and when he used my clipper set (don't know if he used the right settings), he got bumps.

ANY and ALL help with giving him some advice would be GREATLY appreciated ASAP !!!!

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2006-07-12 07:22:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
... and it is VILE!

One Love!
[/quote]


Definition of vile --
1. disgusting: causing disgust or abhorrence
vile smell


2. wicked: despicable or shameful
vile crimes


3. very unpleasant: extremely unpleasant to experience
vile weather


4. worthless: of little or no worth ( archaic )
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-04 23:07:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Also, you are giving ANY (young) Jamaican THEIR LIFE DREAM, to come here to the states and have someone pay for their OWN place, food, lights, cable ...actually anything and to NOT HAVE to "live like the family" they KNEW they were coming here to do in the 1st place??????????????? Just sounds crazy to me !!!!

Just my honest opinion from someone who has been there and done that !!!!! Who are you marrying your family or your fiance??


I can't take this anymore. Why do you insist on thinking that every Jamaican is as worthless as the man you married??? You are a trip!!!! I am sick and tired of reading your whining!!!! GET DIVORCED and get over yourself!!!!!! More reasons for you to all dislike me now. I am a YOUNG Jamaican, with 2 degrees (I have proof!) and I have owned my own home for the last 4.5 years that my American husband and I are going to move into (we curently live in his in Ct but we are moving to Atl). I have shown some of these posts to my husband and his response: "Now you know why I did not marry an American woman." Drama! Drama! Drama!

I am sorry if I have offended some of you but I am a fiercely proud Jamaican and I DO NOT like some of the negative insinuations and false generalizations! This is the last time I will visit this forum. It is supposed to be of some assistance to the people going through this process but it has evolved into something else... and it is VILE!

One Love!


I feel you . Do not give up on the people on here. Sometimes love makes us do odd things and I think some people just get a bit carried away. i agree that not every Jamaican dreaming of the streets paved with gold. I think the comments just got ahead of her.


I don't believe that I said every Jamaican...... I said any....there's a difference. As we've said in here, we're here for SUPPORT, right?
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-04 23:06:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Also, you are giving ANY (young) Jamaican THEIR LIFE DREAM, to come here to the states and have someone pay for their OWN place, food, lights, cable ...actually anything and to NOT HAVE to "live like the family" they KNEW they were coming here to do in the 1st place??????????????? Just sounds crazy to me !!!!

Just my honest opinion from someone who has been there and done that !!!!! Who are you marrying your family or your fiance??


I can't take this anymore. Why do you insist on thinking that every Jamaican is as worthless as the man you married??? You are a trip!!!! I am sick and tired of reading your whining!!!! GET DIVORCED and get over yourself!!!!!! More reasons for you to all dislike me now. I am a YOUNG Jamaican, with 2 degrees (I have proof!) and I have owned my own home for the last 4.5 years that my American husband and I are going to move into (we curently live in his in Ct but we are moving to Atl). I have shown some of these posts to my husband and his response: "Now you know why I did not marry an American woman." Drama! Drama! Drama!

I am sorry if I have offended some of you but I am a fiercely proud Jamaican and I DO NOT like some of the negative insinuations and false generalizations! This is the last time I will visit this forum. It is supposed to be of some assistance to the people going through this process but it has evolved into something else... and it is VILE!

One Love!


I commented on attitudes like the comment you`ve highlighted an was told that people were just tallking about `their` experiences.....But I would whole-heartedly agree with you - people NEED to stop stereotyping! Because you have a few Jamaican friends and happen to have a Jamaican man, does NOT make you an authority on Jamaicans as a whole!



.......just a "few" jamaican friends......??? sorry, but certainly not in my case
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-04 23:03:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
I can't take this anymore. Why do you insist on thinking that every Jamaican is as worthless as the man you married??? You are a trip!!!! I am sick and tired of reading your whining!!!! GET DIVORCED and get over yourself!!!!!! More reasons for you to all dislike me now. I am a YOUNG Jamaican, with 2 degrees (I have proof!) and I have owned my own home for the last 4.5 years that my American husband and I are going to move into (we curently live in his in Ct but we are moving to Atl). I have shown some of these posts to my husband and his response: "Now you know why I did not marry an American woman." Drama! Drama! Drama!

I am sorry if I have offended some of you but I am a fiercely proud Jamaican and I DO NOT like some of the negative insinuations and false generalizations! This is the last time I will visit this forum. It is supposed to be of some assistance to the people going through this process but it has evolved into something else... and it is VILE!

One Love!
[/quote]

Do you have children? If so, how old? Remind me how old you are again?

If you can't take it anymore, do not read what we (or I guess what "I") have to say. I am NOT whining goofball, so get over YOURself!! I am being honest, truthful and realistic. I know for a FACT that there are ALOT of women on this site that have NOT made it. "I" am just the only one that's posting my experience through the eyes of many.

"I" am NOT being "stereo-typical". I know ALOT of Jamaican men AND women that live here and in Jamaica and they've ALL said the same things. I'm going by MY 10 years of "jamaica/jamaican" personal experience and what I've heard from many many people !!!

My husband isn't "worthless"....stupid sometimes and good for you that you are one in a MILLION that is "young" and has 2 degrees. I applaud you, but not EVERYONE is like "you" either !!!

It amazes me your rude comments back to me and potshots as "I" am trying to help those that just really have NO experience with Jamaicans, Jamaica, the culture, etc etc !! I too have my reasons for not marrying an American man as well..........and so his point is ???? Not that color is an "issue"....does make a difference in some of our relationships......but is he white or black??

So please, stay out of the business of telling me that I'm whining....just read on if you don't like what's being said!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-04 22:57:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
I am sitting here totally bewildered.
So he comes to the US and he and your daughter do not get along intially. What happens after 3 months? Do you extend the lease and see how things go. I am going to put aside the whole fiance situation for a min and just deal with this from the perspective that I am not sure your jamaican fiance is trying you on for size so why are YOU trying him on for size?This is a life changing, give everything up and move scenario. We Americans have to understand that just because some Jamaicas are so keen to move here does not necessarily give us the right to encourage them to move from thier comfort zone while we try to work out these domestic situations. I am reading on here about people being afraid to face parents about thier decsions, or face family , or face children. There is a certain sequence of events that should take place before we get our foreign fiance's to make this major sacrifice and move to the United States. Getting the family, children , parents and the like on board is something that needs to be resolved BEFORE if they are that important. Cause if I am an Jamaican fiance and I move to the US and then have an American fiance tell me that either the kids, parents , friends, or the likes do not like me so I have to go back, I may not necessarily take it so nicely. Leave him in Jamaica until you are certain you are going to stick it out no matter what. When he moves here, it should be straight to your home, to your bed and whereever you are from the day he arrives.Besides the obvious problems with immigration, what kind of security are you providing him in this situation. If I was the Jamaican fiance and you came to me with a proposal like this............you will get a rather rude crash course in Jamaican patois and it would not sound good.
[/quote]


The only thing that I don't agree with that the "family" and "parents" issues NEED to be resolved before he gets here. My parents and I aren't that close and have never been. They never ever ask about "my life" whose in it, etc etc....never. It's not brought up by either. I think they know I have a "special someone", but they don't ask. I've been "dealing" with their prejudice my entire 41 years and I will never ever "change" the way they think or feel. Them not knowing is no big deal for me and Craig sees that as well and was WELL AWARE of the entire situation waaaaay before he got here....doesn't understand, but gets it now. My brother and sister don't know either, but I never ever speak to them ...okay wait, maybe once or twice a year and that's at passing at family gatherings. My parents and extended family have *their* issues and I'm not living my life *for them*. My sons opinion is ALL that matters to me.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-04 19:31:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Hey VJ Family!

I got in last night from Jamaica and felt a serious sense of sadness pulling up in my driveway without my honey! The trip was extremely successful, we got approved for the visa, I got to know his family a lot better, and my daughter was able to spend time with my honey to develop a relationship with him prior to him coming here. I was hoping that he would be able to come back with us, but our interview was on 3/27 and of course the visa didn't come in time.... based on all that I have read, and the experience Texas Bound is having, I don't expect him before the beginning of May.... which is probably for the best, because I have some preparations to make....

Ok... I've been gone for over a week, so I've read all of the posts to catch up.... so, I will first describe my experience with the interview, and then would like to comment on some topics discussed....

Our interview was very straight forward, no nastiness like what Ricardo faced! Section A she asked for all of the documents.... didn't specify which documents, and because of everyone else posting their experiences, I was prepared with all of my documents, from the 157, 157K, 230 Pt. 1 &2, Affidavit of support, all supporting financial documentation, Notarized letter of intent from me, his No-Impediment, Police Record, Birth Certificate, Passport Photos, Receipt from paymaster..... everything was in an envelope in a logical order. So when she asked for it, I pulled it out and handed it to her. She went through everything, checking off on her list as she looked at the paperwork. No Problem....

Then at the next window they took his fingerprints.... no problem. Third window.... interview. The lady asked him basic questions about me, asked him to write my name, and asked to see pictures.... no problem. It was nothing like what I had prepared myself for... I think it just boils down to who you get as the interviewer.... and being prepared for anything!After the interview, we were able to spend a wonderful week together.... no complaints, no problems... his family was so gracious and welcoming (we stayed with his mother). My daughter felt at home, I felt at home, and it was simply paradise!

Now, my issue now is very similar to other posts regarding family acceptance of our SO's. I have an 11 yr. old daughter, and my fiance is 24.... my family is flippin out! I just told them he is coming (they don't know about this process or that we are getting married). They say I don't really know him because I have only been around him in a vacation setting.... I am opening the door for tragedy to occur that could permanently ruin my daughter..... How can I make such an irresponsible decision to bring this young man into my home around my daughter! I am 11 years older than my fiance. To make matters worse, I have not had the best luck with relationships in the past.... I admit that I have rushed into relationships, been in two failed marriages that only lasted 7 months each ( I ended both of them)! I will say for certain however, that nothing has every kept me down, the marriages didn't work, but I kept it moving, and never found myself in a worse off situation. I am very responsible, maintain my own home, bills, and am a damn good mother! My daughter and I are very close and we discuss everything! I understand my family's concern, but am upset that they don't think that I've thought about any of this! All they want to do is focus on my bad decisions in the past. They don't consider that I am grown, responsible, and don't ask anyone for anything.... Not to mention, they don't seem to have any concern for me any other time... no one calls to see if I need anything... if I need any help around the house.... need my grass cut.... but now everyone wants to give input on my choice of a mate!!! I am pissed!

I know that they love me and my daughter and don't want to see us hurt, but they don't know how much they are hurting me right now. I don't want him to come here and on top of all the other issues we will be faced with, have to deal with the nastiness of my family! So, I have decided that he will get an apartment for 3 months when he gets here. That will give he and my daughter time to be totally comfortable with each other (they hit it off fine when they met), and it will give time for my family to get to know him. It will be an additional burden on us financially, but I belive it will be worth it in the long run. I have been searching today for rooms for rent, or apt's to share in my area and have come across a few. So, I am hopeful to have something lined up for him. Also, I will be inquiring about work for him working with a contractor, or Lawn care company so that he can have some income coming in right away (where he gets paid cash for each job he does... there are alot of those types of jobs around). This way he will be busy, and making some money until we get the AOS. I am hoping this plan makes things easier for us. I really understand my family, but I also understand that my fiance is leaving familiar territory, supportive family, and his homeland to be with me. I know that has to be scary and hard, and I want to help make the transition as stress free as possible.....

So thank you to everyone that has shared their experiences.... I wish us all success and happiness! :D


My take on this is that if you feel that having him stay in his own apartment is best for YOU and your DAUGHTER, then you are definitely doing the right thing.
If on the other hand, you are doing ir BECAUSE OF your family, I would definitely re-think.
Basically, you are a grown woman, YOU know what's best for YOU, do not allow anyone to DECIDE that on YOUR behalf.....
Would ask though, how does your finace feel about living seperately??
Ie, waking up the morning after he gets here in a strange house on his own??

I wish you the best in your journey, I hope the choice you make is the best one :)


Thanks.

I have thought about why I came to that decision to make sure it was for the right reasons. And, I talked to my daughter about it. I don't want her to feel that I am forcing my fiance on her. She is used to it just being her and I.... Although she likes him, she did express that she would feel more comfortable being around him a while longer and getting to know him better before he moves in the house with us. So that is the main reason I am doing this. The fact that it will give everyone time to get to know him, and ease the stress.... is a big plus.

I guess I should not have made it sound like it was my decision alone. I of course discussed this extensively with my fiance. He totally understood my reasoning, and agreed that this would be the best course of action for now. The plan is to find someplace within 5 min. of my house, and he will likely spend most of the time here at the house. He doesn't want me to be stressed, he doesn't want my daughter to be uncomfortable, so he totally supports this decision. He is truely wonderful!

I do agree with others that the 3 months is a critical time to get to know one another up close and personal. I believe I can still do that even though he will have a seperate place. We will still spend the majority of our time at our home, and will definitely see each other daily. It will also give him an opportunity to establish friendships. We are not looking for an apt. actually but more of a roommate situation. I found a few yesterday where STRAIGHT men were looking to rent rooms in their condo/house. I have an appt. on Saturday to check out one about 5 min. from me.



I personally think that is THE WORSE decision you could possibly make....living apart. As a parent of a 13 yr old (single mom from day one) and VERY VEEEERY close to my son.....this is YOUR decision, your CHILD needs to respect YOUR decision in bringing him into YOUR immediate family!!! You won't change the opinions of your parents, but your child is what matters the most, which is great she would want to be comfortable and you value her opinions, she's also 11.....but maybe that's when you could have taken more time in getting to know him together (in trips to Jamaica---which we veterans have stated NUMEROUS times is absolutely and completely different than living here) and not have gone through the process until SHE felt "more comfortable".

TRUST ME, you NEED to live together, especially that you have a child, because the situation is WAY different than it would be if it was JUST the 2 of you. What happens when you get married on the 90th day and you "move in", and you DO NOT get along????? and who is to say that after the 3 months he (or your daughter) says that "they aren't ready"????

You do know he still has up to 6 months (after the VISA is approved) to arrive into the states???

Also, I would assume with immigration, that would be a HUUUUUGE RED FLAG to them showing that he came here to "live on his own" and NOT live with YOU as stated on ALL of your paperwork????

My family doesn't know about Craig, don't need to because I am not living for them, I'm living for myself !!

Also, you are giving ANY (young) Jamaican THEIR LIFE DREAM, to come here to the states and have someone pay for their OWN place, food, lights, cable ...actually anything and to NOT HAVE to "live like the family" they KNEW they were coming here to do in the 1st place??????????????? Just sounds crazy to me !!!!

Just my honest opinion from someone who has been there and done that !!!!! Who are you marrying your family or your fiance??
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-04 10:54:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

We have lots of Jamaican restuarants and grocery stores in our area. Some are good while others are terrible but we have plenty to choose from. We recently found a restuarant called "Jus Jerk" owned by rastas. The chicken is cooked on a open pit like in JA -- the best jerk chicken and festival out of JA. Damien says it's the best (and we've eaten at dozens of restaurants) besides the American jerk chicken I cook for him :lol: I guess that's a compliment...not sure :huh:

We also to go to a restaurant called Caribbean Delight...he loves their ackee and saltfish and I love their oxtail.

We had a Jamaican day yesterday - started off with chicken from Jus Jerk and festival, then to the Caribbean grocery store to shop for Easter's dinner. Damien got two large HTB easter buns and cheese along with other good food. I got a small round spice bun with cheese which I ate this morning :rolleyes: The cricket match was on so we stayed to watch some of it...he was happy to watch the match with other Jamaicans. Afterwards, we went to the Jamaican ice cream store (they have flavors like sweet sop, sour sop, guiness, guineup, mango etc) for his favorite grapenut ice cream...it is very good ice cream, all natural. Then we went to the Caribbean club last night....we danced the entire night. Boy, I am still full and tired....



Hey Shemanya,

Where are those places located exactly? I've searched our area....Ellicott City and Columbia areas and I haven't found any good Jamaican places. There's an African store across the street, but they don't cook stuff. Do you know of any place in my area??

Gosh, that's crazy to hear about Damien !!! I'm happy that he's okay.....AND wearing his flippin seat belt. Yet, another issue with Craig ....NOT wearing his seat belt !
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-02 09:46:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
[quote name='Jonesie' date='Apr 1 2007, 05:10 PM' post='813255']


Thanks Jonesie.....but....at this point, I do want OUT !!! His bags have been packed for over a month (his choice), but he will NOT flippin leave!!! Yes, I could call immigration and have him deported, but...I just don't want him to get into trouble even for HIS stupidity!!!! I've given him options--- leave the country, leave this house, stay here WORK it out, stay here go through AOS then get divorced. I am emotionally exhausted from 8 months of stuff !!!

Thanks B)
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-01 16:19:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Please you guys, don't feel "sorry" for me. Just being realistic with how it is (or may be). I am a VERY strong woman. I keep on truckin and doing my best to make the BEST out of my crappy relationship!!! I truly truly WISH it was different, trust me "I" have done EVERYTHING!!! Craig is the one that makes HIS life miserable. The things he does HE choses to do and screws HIMself over !!!! I will not baby-fy him in ANY way.

If I let this stuff reeeeeally get to me, I would be a total basket case!!!! I keep myself VERY busy, just to not "wally" in all of it.

Also, I'm very fortunate to have TONS of hook-ups here as well. I get 4 tickets (free) to all of our indoor professional soccer games. I'm sooooooo into sports (especially soccer) that now Craig goes around telling everyone that he HATES soccer because of me!!! (although he knew that I was into it --my sons been playing since he was 5)!! Since I do the travel for the owner of one of our arenas here in Maryland, I've been able to score tickets (free) to Cirque du Soleil ...Scream Tour (hip hop/rap concert), Circus, Monster Truck, Indoor Football and then another concert tonight (Street Tour). I had an invite to the Jamaican celebration in DC that I took him to. I had a travel function at Medieval Times 2 weeks ago that I took him to. Craig does NOT appreciate of it !!! Its sad!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-01 13:21:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Immigration has basicly in my point of view, taken away their manhood.

Yes, I agree with this. When you're in Jamaica you're on THEIR turf. You have to RELY on them for everything. :yes: Where to go, what to do, how to get there, the culture, norms, exchange rate, etc.. Then they get here in the U.S. and they have to rely on YOU for everything. They are not the man of the house or head of the house - you are whether you like it or not. They have to learn a whole new set of rules and laws and cultures and norms. It's a complete role reversal. Add to that the major fact that they can't even work and help "bring home the bacon" and it really depresses them.



I don't believe that I am on "his" turf in Jamaica. I personally have never ever ever had to rely on Craig for anything in Jamaica. I already knew the area, culture, norms, exchange, etc etc waaaaay before I met him. I have friends that have their own ride and have driven us places. I actually showed HIM around Negril and the West End and places to eat and visit. Craig had never gone jet-skiing until I hooked him up with a friends jet ski. He even went to several travel agent functions a couple of times when I was there and he got to see how that whole part of my life was (is).

I do my best to make him feel that "he" is man of the house, but........when he's absolutely NOT trying to be a responsible and mature role model.....????? that's where MY frustration goes out the window. Once he started working I showed him (several) times how to budget. Bought a book for him to start writing things in, keeping track of work, receipts, etc. Showed him how I do my budget every month. I showed him how to file things away, like his pay stubs, work stuff, resumes and trying to keep him organized.

I rarely ask Craig for money, but he NEVER offers it on his own either. The my money is my money....and basically you (being me) pays for everything. That mentality of coming here and the WOMAN paying for EVERYTHING has been Craig's motto....but that was after he got here that I found that out!!

His cousin is here (got married to an American in Jamaica and then came -lives in New York) and his woman is LOADED, so Craig THINKS that I am. I laugh....cause I'm not. I don't own my own house or car and he knew that WAY before he came here. He constantly thinks that "I" am hiding money, but I budget. He ALWAYS says I'm "tight" with my money....yep, I am to a degree. I don't believe in spending LOADS of money on clothes and material things. I don't shop at Nordtroms (sp?)...I'm an Old Navy buff, Target, Walmart and JC Penney's. Craig thinks that since spend "cheap" that my clothes are cheap....whatever. I'd rather spend my money on vacation, but while on vacation I don't spend and spend and spend. I've gone to Jamaica for a week and only had $100 (extra) to spend. So I never had money being "flashed" around. I have TONS of "hook-ups" and don't have to pay for this and that.

Before Craig came here, I went over the "head of the house" stuff......he "said" (a trillion times) that "he understood it would be that way". If I had a penny for everytime he told me that HE would work veeeeeeeery hard to work AND support his family....I would be RICH !!! Unfortunately, that has NEVER happened. I could be driving him back and forth on fumes ...and Craig would NEVER offer to buy gas !!!!

So, in my situation, it's different and I HOPE TO GOD, that noone has to go through what I have gone (and still am) going through!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-04-01 13:09:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Oh, Kelly (from one Kelly to another!), I'm so sorry. I feel for you.

My friend, Niina, who lives in Canada had this same kind of thing happen to her....after 6 years of marriage. She even lived with him in Jamaica for 3 years before they got married and immigrated. She actually kicked him out; but he has chosen not to go back. It's been really hard on her too.

Yes, there comes a time when everyone has to grow up. If he can't, they he can't.

Does he work? When you say boredom, do you mean when he's not working? or is this an all the time thing?
[/quote]


He's not working right at the moment. He works for 3 temp agencies in the area.....and I tell him HE has to be "pro-active" in looking, they will not knock on your door. His last job ended last week and he drives me CRAZY !!!

I truly truly know that it's hard on Craig coming to someplace that he's never been and experiencing everything for the 1st time. We TALK about it ALL of the time. I'm constantly trying to help him in ways to better himself but not tell him what to do. Granted I've had to teach him how to use EVERYTHING ...he's got the laundry and doing dishes down to a science. But for instance, I asked him NICELY last night (AGAIN for the trillionith time ---that's where patience comes into MAJOR play --especially after a reeeeeally long day), that when he comes in can he just try his best to put away his stuff.... like glasses, CD player, shirt laying around the kitchen, cup in another location, lights on, doors open. I'm not a neat freak, but just to have the common areas "straightened up" in case I have a client that's coming over.

Craig USED to be kind, sweet and thoughtful to me. Did really nice things for me in Jamaica.............but..........haven't seen THAT person since he's been here !!!!!!!

Okay, I gotta do some work today :blink:
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-30 13:22:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
[quote name='Jayandmars' date='Mar 30 2007, 01:51 PM' post='810117']


Whenever I do visit again, I want to go to Negril. Jay liked it a lot..less harassment than in other locations.

Just an FYI..... in Negril there is TONS and TONS of "harrassment"!!! It's gotten sooooo bad (as most parts). Two years ago, we were all out celebrating (basically just hanging out) watching a local band for my friends husbands birthday with ALL of our local friends that we've known over the past 10 yrs. I was leaving the island the next day and they (her and her husband) were still there. She called me and told me that after we had gone back to the hotel (we stayed at different ones this trip), they were robbed at knife point!! It happens alllllll of the time, but you just never read (or hear) about it!!! and this is one story of maaaaany that I know about !
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-30 13:10:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

I think quite a few generalizations are being aired in this thread.
In MY experience, Jamaican men who have to be treated like children are the EXCEPTION rather than the norm, certainly none of the Jamaican men I have been out with have acted like kids.
I think the problem in some cases may be that if you treat a man like a child, he acts like one. If you treat a man like a man and take if for granted he will act like one, in my experience this has been the case.
Again, I may be too sensitive, but I seem to see a trend to 'classify' Jamaican men, as if they are a 'species', there are good, bad, honest, untrustworthy men in every country.

As for some Jamaican men seeing Americans as being rich because of ipods, Xboxes etc, it all depends what social strata they come from.
If you are dating a gardener, a taxi driver in ANY country I am sure they would have some illusions about how they see someone with all the trappings mentioned.
Again, I lived in Jamaica often not knowing where the next meal would come from.
Here, I live in a modest apartment, have two holidays aborad a year, my son has an Xbox, expensive clothes, and damn right I feel 'rich'.
I am by no means rich by western standards, but I can basically buy anything I fancy within reason and have the luxury of knowing that I can maintain this lifestyle.
I think part of the problem with unrealistic expectations stem from behaviour of visitors to Jamaica. If you are anything like me, I save the whole year to go to Jamaica, I comb through the sales to buy new clothes to wear there, I set myself a generous daily spending limit etc. When people there see how you 'live' for the two weeks or week you are there, they think that's how it is always.
But I think the best thing to do is to prepare your other half for the reality of living here.
That you may cook one night and eat the leftovers the next, etc etc.

though i have not posted for a while i still read this thread everyday..................... but this topic struck a nerve so i had to comment........ as a Jamaican man i totally agree with u "alienuk" u cant classify all Jamaican men as on thing even if a percentage of them have certain personality trates i have lots responsible hard working friends who act like men and not children an on the other i have friends who are the complete opposite. it all boils back down to u really knowing the man u are with or dating, an these men they don't change as soon as they come to the u.s this way they were b4 the personality trates just become more obvious. the bottom line is get to know the person i mean really get to know them b4 u plan to live with them .




Alcohol in our house is a "no-no" too. I used to keep a six pack or a bottle of wine in the frig...for a chilly when I got home from work, or at the end of my day working ..on a Friday..or when I cook I throw in some wine. Now....NO WAY, can't keep any of it in the house because it WILL be gone!! and the temptation is there for "whenever he wants to"....11am on a Sat????

I've been going to Jamaica (all over, but mostly Negril) for 10 yrs now and up to 3 to 4x in a year, mostly staying at the same hotel. I have TONS and TONS of Jamaican men FRIENDS. I've never had an intimate "true" relationship with a Jamaican man until I met Craig. TRUST ME there are TONS of Jamaican men JUST LIKE CRAIG. I saw it each and every day that I was in Negril or Montego Bay or Ocho Rios. They are everywhere, just like here in the states......and I also didn't meet Craig on my 1st or 2nd time to Jamaica........it was my 20th time!! I know more people in the area where I met him than he does, but eeeeeeeeveryone told me that Craig was a TOTALLY nice guy, shy, doesn't drink (like crazy), etc etc BEFORE I even started a relationship with him.

When we took our friendship into a relationship, all we did was TALK......TALKING and TALKING and MORE talking.......I mean we talk about absoLUTELY everything under the sun !!! He was unlike any other Jamaican man (or American man) that I've ever met, we completely connected on a TOTALLY different level. "I" am NOT one to "fall in love" at 1st site and didn't....took me awhile. We never went to "clubs", he's not a club person. I am. We went and had dinners on the beach at small places and TALKED!!! We've too sat on the balcony or porch and TALKED.

We talked everyday, several times a day, for hours.....and "I" THOUGHT we knew each other QUITE WELL !!! Once we decided the next step was for him to come here, I brought pictures of my apartment complex, pictures of my entire inside of my apartment, my cats, my friends, the roads, my office, my part-time job, my sons soccer, my sons school, my sons friends, family, anything and everything that I could to *share* with him and give him some type of idea about how it is here and what to expect and that you HAVE to work hard to make it, etc etc. But as Shauna said, when he talks to friends and/or family....THAT is ALL thrown out the window and you start from scratch!!

SO, when he came here........HE CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All of my friends (here and there) that knew Craig have seen the change and especially me AND my son and it's NOT for the better !!!

I just don't know what to do about Craig. His bags have been packed (for the 4th time) for over a month. Options that I gave him, leave the country OR buck up and MAKE this relationship work. It "works" for a couple of days and then BAM back to the same old A-hole !!!

If he had medical insurance I would have him checked out for a chemical imbalance ....or maybe bi-polar !!! I know it's not me and everyone that knows ME well (and friends that have known me for over 20 yrs) knows that it's NOT me!!! For those that know what I've gone through for the past almost 9 months know that I've given MY ALL and the TONS of patience and whatever else you call it !!! "I" definitely deserve a gold star in heaven !!!!!!

Being bored, yes...makes them do stupid ####### !!! I don't get that either and it's NOT up to me to keep him busy!!! I do NOT treat Craig like a child I treat him as a man ---or one that's supposed to ACT like a man !!! I remind him CONSTANTLY that he HAS to be a positive role model for my son if he's going to be in this relationship and he was WELL AWARE OF THAT BEFORE he came here !!!

Okay I'm done ranting......I don't know........it's frustrating as ALL get out !!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-30 13:01:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Hi everyone I am by know means a Vet I am somewhere in between
I wanted to add my two cents into the adjustment process theirs and ours.
I totally agree with whom ever said that you really don't know your love one untill they are here.
My husband arrived before Christmas we have had alot of hurdles to overcome because we did not know each other. It is real easy to be nice and easy going for a week or two at a time when you are on vacation because most of that time you are making up for lost time :devil: . When they are here 7 days a 24 hrs a day it gets to be more then a challege . You get up and go to work and he's still in the bed :blink: drives me wacko!!! And I know he would work if he could :thumbs: . Finding out that he has to get a GED "WHAT YOU DIDN"T FINISH HIGH SCHOOL"!! That never came up in our conversations :o . You have to be very prepared like the Vets say don't take anything for granted and know yourself. If you are not PATENT you are in for a hard road. I love my husband very much and i would do it again but please be prepared to raise a 5th grader at first!!! Then they start getting cocky when they think they have learned something . Take it day by day and know the road is not easy . LET the love help you through the hard times.
[/quote]
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For those that have known me for the past (almost) 2 yrs.....know that I am honest and NOT embarrassed to air out my "dirty laundry" on here. I am here to HELP those that are going through this process and to listen when others are having problems, etc etc. For those that have been on here for awhile know what I've dealt with in the past.........and to be HONEST, I'm still "dealing" with some of those same issues.

There is an age difference between Craig and myself. Craig was an absolutely TOTALLY different person in Jamaica!!! He COMPLETELY changed about the 3rd week after he got here. Then when he started working and having that "freedom", it was even a million times worse!!!!! Especially for the "young" guys....all the women that are here in the states ....and STUPID ones that don't CARE if the man is wearing a wedding ring and is married......they will do anything to jeopardize that..........and of course, the man has to NOT "promote" that too!!

I have been a single parent of a now 13 yr old boy (my sons father has never been in the picture). I've been "on my own" since I was 18yrs old. Since having my son, I've struggled and for those of us that are single parents (who grew up in a single parent household) know exactly what I'm talking about. My son does NOT have the IPOD, Xbox 360 and cell phone....nor will he anytime soon. HE buys his own shoes, by working for my part-time boss or mowing my parents lawn and he saves his money and then buys those expensive darn shoes. But.....my son has been everywhere, that's where my money has been spent on traveling and letting him experience other cultures and parts of the world. That means more to me than having the material things in life.

Craig STILL does NOT "get" that rent, electric and phone bill HAVE to be paid every month and ON time....he just does not "get that". Now that he has a cell phone, that he went out and bought with his own money and HAS to pay the bill on time AND having his own bank account....hoping that will some day hit him that he does have to have responsibilities. He's overdrawn his bank account a million times !!!

After the rent, electric, phone bill, groceries, gas, cat food, litter, then just other stuff that come up.....they have to be paid!!

I'm very very fortunate to own my own company and I've worked extremely hard to get where I am...and continue to work hard every day. I work from home and come and go as I want. We live in an area that has transportation to everywhere and the grocery store, Walmart, liquor store (can be a bad thing at times), restaurants, bowling alley are RIGHT up the street from our place. I know alot of you guys that live in the suburbs don't have that....and dag I couldn't imagine what you go through.

Most of the times I do NOT take Craig places because he HAS to learn the area and getting around and seeing how it goes here (in this area). I didn't buy his cell phone because he had to know what it's like to "be responsible". I've raised my son and I REFUSE to raise another one, especially an adult.

I have a LOADS of patience....and I've needed to with Craig.....trust me (kisteet)!!! He's tested me in every which way....that's the age difference AND culturally. ALOT of Jamaican men *think* they can do and get away with things here in America like they did down there!!!

So, for those on here that have problems, issues, marital, parenting, etc etc......or can help those that are "comin up"....I beg of you, to "air out" your stuff to be able to help others and actually those of us that are veterans.

I miss the other veterans that haven't been on here for quite awhile and hope they still do lurk 'round ....you know who you are, please stop in to say hi and let us know how you're doing. If things are NOT the way "they are supposed to be"....so what, we are NOT here to judge, but to SUPPORT each other !! Good, bad and the ugly !

(L)

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-29 19:07:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
I am personally NOT surprised at all at the way they treated you guys, especially with the age difference!!

As I've posted in the past, my interview was ridiculous!! Only "I" was interviewed, not Craig and TRUST ME, I should have listened to ALL of the red flags!!!

I'm glad that he was able to "handle" the drilled questions as you PREPARED him for!!! but....it's done FOR a reason!!!!!

I have tried to prepare those that have that age difference (and are white/black couples) as best as "I" can.

I'm going to stress this once again, that this process is NOT easy ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ARRIVE HERE !!!! There's a HUGE adjustment for them --well everyone!!! It does NOT matter how many times you say something and "prepare" them in advance. What they've seen, heard, watched in the movies...will NOT compare to how it REALLY is here in the states.

Do NOT go into this with blinders on and think that everything will be sooooooooo hunky dory.

IF you do not have children, it will be like having an ADULT CHILD for awhile !!! If you do not have patience ....

If anyone has any questions, please feel free to PM me.

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-29 10:34:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Just another tidbit of information (and/or suggestion).......

Instead of paying for passport photos upon passport photos..... I had one of Craig's passport photos that he gave to me (in the very beginning) and I brought it home and made copies on my copier/scanner at home onto FUJI photo film and so he had a TON, but it only cost me $4.00 for 12 sheets of glossy film paper. He had about 15 photos that I copied.

If anyone has capability of doing that....and getting it to your SO.....it saves in the extra expense!

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-19 11:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
[quote name='nannygirl82' date='Mar 16 2007, 07:15 AM' post='780850']
good morning.....aaahh winter is back... :angry: i was getting used to the warm weather...


I hear ya !!! It was 80 degrees 2 days ago, 75 yesterday till about 3pm....and today, coooold, sleet, rain and also calling for 2-4 inches of snow !!! I said to Craig this morning, you've now seen ALL of our changes in season within 2 days !!!!

Have a nice weekend everyone. For all you Irish folk (like myself) --Happy Patty's Day !! Our soccer tournament in Virginia was canceled this weekend, so it's nice to HAVE a weekend to do nothing !!

Enjoy... :dance:
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-16 11:44:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
ok. as said before you need to go to a paymaster BEFORE the interview!!!! you need the reciept at the interview because basically you are paying to have the interview NOT the visa....AFTER you are approved they will give you a piece of paper you go over to airpack and i think it is like 11 bucks US dollars and i am pretty sure you don't have a choice they will deliver it to you!!!!!!
[/quote]


To reiterate as to what Jonesie, Mindy, Rhonda and Shauna have all said......ladies (and/or if we have any men that are newbies)....

My suggestion.....have a file in your computer (or print the information and have a file) --I have both....name your file
VJ info and everything that has been said that is IMPORTANT information and/or simple things like paying the $100 PRIOR to your interview and KEEPING the receipt (because you take that into the interview with you). You can pay ahead of time, we paid the day before. Keep that information somewhere that the same SIMPLE questions are right there in your "saved" file. Having the forms TYPED, not handwritten, that kind of stuff...

The process is very very cut and dry if you have the information all in one place, you'll be good to go. I had the forms all completed a month prior, but I re-printed everything the day before I went down for the interview. I had updated letters of intent (not signed by Craig) printed up so that he could sign them. They do NOT need to be notarized and they never took them.

Sorry that "I" am being harsh, but there is simple stuff and then questions that need to be answered because things HAVE changed and constantly are changing. The only things that have changed ---the Embassy moved, they now need the
no (non)-impediment BS thing --which took about a month for Craig to receive, Frontal photos, no sides (as Mindy stated) and forms to be typed. I just took the example that is on VJ and typed "my/our" info in there and printed it out.

I also keep a file (in my computer) of everyones interview information, ie what was needed, taken, etc etc for those that have questions in the future.

Its about time that the Embassy gets even MORE strict with paperwork (a little more organized would be ALOT better and less hassle) ....what "I" truly wish is that they make it MANDATORY for the ones that are coming here to go to a school for 90 days (or so) to help them learn and understand what to expect in the US!!! and if they can't get through the SIMPLE stuff, than they are denied.

It does NOT matter HOW many times you tell your man about things here, they will NOT "listen" (and/or believe you) until they get here and they deal with it themselves. Craig STILL thinks money grows on trees and working HARD for a paycheck is just ???!!! Each and every day is a challenge and like I've mentioned tons of times before, if you don't have children.....you NEED patience with your significant other when they arrive!!!! and be prepared to repeat and teach them almost EVERYTHING !!!!! I've raised my son (who is 13) ....didn't really and truly think I'd have to basically raise another one !!!

Even if we weren't ####### before this process, we turn out to be that way!! We've all had different situations with dealing with the Embassy and some harder than others....mine included. As I've stated numerous times in the past, "I" was the one interviewed NOT my husband at all --which is crazy!! If you don't intend to go to the interview, they will ask LOTS of questions and the interview is nerve wracking as ALL GET OUT!!! I felt like crying, throwing up and laughing hysterically all in one breath !!! Giving birth was easier !!!

If you have ANY questions feel free to PM me !!!

We're all here for SUPPORT and answer the tough questions, although ...again, us "veterans" may not have the "new" answers......only the newbies can help those that are going through the process especially since Dec 2006

Good luck !!!

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-15 12:18:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

I decided on that house. My granny and I went to look at it today. It's a special gem. I really could see us not living there. My granny lives 10 minutes away and I couldn't live that close to her. She is so against our marriage. Divorce is what she says will become of us. We aren't like my parents she said who have been married for 35 years. She asked why isn't he here yet shouldn't he be. You have been waiting since you got married and he could try a little hard to be here with you. If he loved you he be here now. I said the visa takes a while. Right now the negativity makes me not want to live next to her. A bad in law for us would spell bad news. She was negative about helping full fill his dream of college and told me he should pay and let him go into debt. This small minded woman has left a bad taste in my mouth. Do you guys run into these type of family members? :angry:



Jax, my family ESPECIALLy my parents will never support my relationship with Craig....ever!! He's been here since June of last year and we live less than 5 miles from my parents and they STILL have NO CLUE about my relationship.....nor do they ever ever ask. I'm not "that" close with them, never have been BUT....if and when they do find out.....or lordy, it will be reeeeeally reaaaally bad. I just think of how it will affect my son. For me, I've dealt with their BS prejudice-ness my entire life and I will never change how *they* feel and trust me, your granny will never change either and you won't be able to see it any other way. The reason why Mindy, you and myself (if there are any others, please speak up)....but since we are caucasian and the other is black/brown....THAT is still, unfortunately not "accepted". I'm "not allowed" to bring black people down to my Uncle's beach house !!!! soooo, I don't go there anymore, ever!!

The absolute ONLY support I've had are the friends that I have met on this site !!! I can't even talk about Craig with my best/close friends. I've lost a close relationship with one of my cousins, sucks....but that's life and we deal with it the best that we can. Folks that are not in this type of situation/relationship will never ever ever "understand"!!

We all here for support !!

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-14 12:55:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
[/quote]

Good evening. I know you're frustrated and tired of interviewing but don't be so hard on yourself. The good thing is that these can be fixed. And in regards to your extension, you canfile for one but sounds like you may be given an automatic extension based on the circumstances.

Taxes are a big issue - three years is a must. For bank statements I submitted six months worth, some actually print out a years worth. You can sign on to your account online and print out the monthly statements.
I didn't submit a notarized letter from the bank - they printed out my account information and the branch manager signed and dated (with blue ink) - but this may have changed since we filed in 2005. To be safe I'd do all of the forms online and print out.

Hang in there (F) and realize that you haven't been denied! This will all work out and your honey will get approved :yes:
[/quote]



I didn't have any bank statements at all and was never asked for any of them. I ONLY took letters for each account (1-for business & 1-for personal) from my bank manager stating when I opened my account and that I have an outstanding ....?? can't remember, I would have to dig that stuff out. The interviewer never ever looked at my bank stuff.

Also, at our interview ONLY "I" was interviewed, Craig was not asked one thing, he was sent to sit down. The interviewer ONLY looked meticulously at our pictures (25 or so of them---that I had sent in with my original paperwork), he did not want employer letters, new pictures, new letters.

Every interview is entirely different, you just HAVE to be OVER PREPARED, because you never ever know WHAT they'll ask for!!!!

Your man will HAVE to write (and print) your name, at least that's what almost everyone of us veterans had to do. So make sure they are practicing !!!

From my understanding now, they are saying 7 to 10 BUSINESS days for the Visas. I would definitely wait that long, because again, you never ever know !!! We had almost 2 weeks before Craig finally got his Visa, because noone knew where his medical stuff was!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-03-01 23:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
He's coming over on a K3" right? won't he be able to work when he arrives in the US? The extra income would help.
[/quote]

He is coming on a CR1 but he will need to adjust for at least a month. I remember trying to get work for myself when I was in college here and it was hard. He will start GED classes first and then add part time work. When reading this thread everyone at first said it was hard for their SO to get a job or a real good paying one.
[/quote]


Craig was VERY fortunate to be able to work when he got here (cause my client works for immigration). He started his 1st job a month after he got here and that actually helped him learn alot! He even took the bus to and from and he said he likes that alot because it helps him get to know the area (although for a 20 min regular drive it takes about 2 hours by bus). He worked in a warehouse for a football (equipment & apparel) company and when they moved their offices and was laid off, he's employed by 3 different temp agencies and keeping pretty busy (except for the past 2 weeks). His lowest paid job has been $10.50/hour and he'll start a new one on Monday at $15/hour. I don't think that's to bad??

Grocery shopping....between my son & Craig, we are at the grocery store at least 2x a week. Craig loves ALL food here, well except for broccoli & mushrooms. He says he sometimes misses Jamaican food but he absolutely LOVES the food that I "put together". I'm one of the cooks that just throws things together and makes up stuff as I go along. Craig makes AWESOME chicken and he's learning all the time to "throw stuff" together like me.

Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaarin ----where are ya girl???
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-02-27 19:56:00