ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 06:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Sep 12 2007, 06:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jengles @ Sep 12 2007, 05:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 05:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 12 2007, 04:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 03:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 12 2007, 04:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 03:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 12 2007, 03:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 02:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif

Does anyone have to deal with a competitive environment at work? If so, how do you deal with it without being unethical? Just a question to through out there.



I think you are going to have to elaborate just a bit on this one, KK, for me to form an answer.



LOL. I guess I'll describe my situation. I'm working with a team where I'm new fairly too. Well, I had to listen for an hour about a former team member that wanted to be the "STAR." And how she would try to give her suggestions all the time. Well, I'm seeing it from another light. It doesn't seem like the old team member was the only fault. I've had conversations with the team on what should be done and was shut down. One team member call manager and manager says same thing I said. Then she just disregarded that I said anything. I'm very technical and can quote standards (Policies and Procedures) and not to say I know everything..but I have something to offer. If I don't know something, I'm going to research the heck out of it. So far several ocassions has past where I put my two cents in and got robbed. LOL. Now, I'm really in the mood to just speak my mind and not in a polite way. mad.gif


How new are you to the team? To the company? Maybe you just have to wait out that period of time where you all get to know each other better and learn to appreciate what everyone has to offer.

I love when someone comes in, knowing important things already; but not running all over everyone. I always step back and see how they interact before I accept them fully. I've had so many new people come in and take over, only to crash and burn later, leaving me to pick up the pieces. Thus, the reason I am cautious. Could it be something like that?



Umm...I guess. But when she is quoting the wrong references...It gets kind of funny. I'm laughing inside right now. laughing.gif no0pb.gif

One....Cause she is "teaching" the group ,using white board and all, on how to do some work. But she is referenceing the wrong references...and the fact that that reference has been superceded by new ones. She should know this.

Two....She calls the manager for everything. Where I came from you made decisions and presented it to the managers. It just make her look weak.

Third....I'm new but we are both "supervisors", why is she reviewing my work. Keep in mind One and Two above. I was told by the manager that he would review. I don't trust her review comments. She don't even know what the correct standard we are following.



That's a little more touchy, KK. Even though I would feel like saying, hey you fool.........you have to be more tactful. You might have to just pull her aside and tell her you thought it was this instead of this or something like that.

Part of your scenario sounds to me like you will just have to wait out the newness. Part of it makes me wonder if she isn't an idiot. Just bide you time, girl. If she is a clown, your time will come to show her up in a very tactful, yet important way, where everyone will notice.


innocent.gif I invited her to a meeting with the client that I'm running. And, I will politely reference the right standards. innocent.gif


just be careful about the reviewing your work, this should be a temporary thing I'm assuming because your new, don't let it become permanent...she probably feels threatned by you because your new. Try making her feel at ease,


If I just read all of this correctly and not knowing the field you're in....... could you go to your supervisor and say.... I just want to make sure that I have up-to-date information/standards or whatever term you would use .... and show him/her what you have been given. Then it would be up to your boss to make sure that everyone (ie that other goofball) has her correct info straight? Is your supervisor one to do something about issues ? or stand back and not take any heat ? Cause those types....argh !!

At my pt-time job my boss (he owns a financial planning business out of his home) just hired 2 new people in the last week. I've been there a little over 2 yrs and he's been through 3 people for that position. I am the one moving desks and having to be inconvenienced to say the least....but I tell him!!! The work that he hired for is VERY easy, but not busy work. The last chic (just quit)...24 yrs old, married to an "older man" (he's 38) and she's a step-mother to his autistic son (I've seen her with him....lets just say she needs ALOT of parenting classes --told me SHE doesn't want kids because that would take up all of HER free time!!!), and then she sucks her thumb !!!! She made a MILLION mistakes, but I made it known that since SHE was making the mistakes and it was reflecting my job and not getting done what "I" need to do to be productive. I'm only there a couple of hours a week, not doing my job AND her job!!!

So one of the employees (a woman) ....thinks SHE knows everything about anything !! I'm not sure how long she's going to last. When my boss called her references, warning flags by a couple of her last employers said, watch her attendance!!! Yesterday when I was there, she was complaining that she thought she was getting sick.....and she's only been there 4 days !!!!

Good luck ! It's a tough position to be in.


It's just hard not being heard.


I totally hear ya....that's the problem with the 2 travel agencies....older folk SET in their ways and their ways, especially in this fast paced industry was NEVER going to work !!!! That's why they are both out of business and here I am truckin along.

Some how, some way..... we gotta get you "heard" !!!! What type of job/position are you in?
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 17:28:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
[/quote]

I just read this part.... see that makes me angry. You bust your butt to go into what you think will be a nice position and then you have brown-nosing person who doesn't know SQUAT and noone sees that ????? Frustrating as all get out KK !!! I've been in your position before TONS of times!!!

The 1st travel agency I worked at...just because one of the other agents knew the owner/boss for a veeeery long time and he NEVER had the balls to fire her ....was extremely frustrating to say the least !!! I was there 5 yrs and this other agent lost 2 of our MAJOR accounts (that helped the business stay afloat), called in sick literally every other day. Made TONS and I mean TONS of costly mistakes and here I was ...low man on totem poll, making the least in the office and bringing in MORE business than anyone, working all godly hours, coming in on weekends. I found out that he was going to be going out of business before anyone else in the office did.........and I got out QUICK and went to the next travel agency working for the 3 owners (all caddy back stabbing women) and being low man ...again...although promised and moon and stars to come and work there --never saw any of that !!! They sought *me* out at a travel show to come and work for them.....worked there 3 yrs, found out that THEY were going to be selling/merging with another agency and my name was never mentioned, so I got out and started my own business cause I could not deal working for anyone like that ANYmore.

Keep on venting here...............it will make you feel ALOT better !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 17:24:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jengles @ Sep 12 2007, 05:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 05:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 12 2007, 04:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 03:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 12 2007, 04:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 03:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 12 2007, 03:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 02:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif

Does anyone have to deal with a competitive environment at work? If so, how do you deal with it without being unethical? Just a question to through out there.



I think you are going to have to elaborate just a bit on this one, KK, for me to form an answer.



LOL. I guess I'll describe my situation. I'm working with a team where I'm new fairly too. Well, I had to listen for an hour about a former team member that wanted to be the "STAR." And how she would try to give her suggestions all the time. Well, I'm seeing it from another light. It doesn't seem like the old team member was the only fault. I've had conversations with the team on what should be done and was shut down. One team member call manager and manager says same thing I said. Then she just disregarded that I said anything. I'm very technical and can quote standards (Policies and Procedures) and not to say I know everything..but I have something to offer. If I don't know something, I'm going to research the heck out of it. So far several ocassions has past where I put my two cents in and got robbed. LOL. Now, I'm really in the mood to just speak my mind and not in a polite way. mad.gif


How new are you to the team? To the company? Maybe you just have to wait out that period of time where you all get to know each other better and learn to appreciate what everyone has to offer.

I love when someone comes in, knowing important things already; but not running all over everyone. I always step back and see how they interact before I accept them fully. I've had so many new people come in and take over, only to crash and burn later, leaving me to pick up the pieces. Thus, the reason I am cautious. Could it be something like that?



Umm...I guess. But when she is quoting the wrong references...It gets kind of funny. I'm laughing inside right now. laughing.gif no0pb.gif

One....Cause she is "teaching" the group ,using white board and all, on how to do some work. But she is referenceing the wrong references...and the fact that that reference has been superceded by new ones. She should know this.

Two....She calls the manager for everything. Where I came from you made decisions and presented it to the managers. It just make her look weak.

Third....I'm new but we are both "supervisors", why is she reviewing my work. Keep in mind One and Two above. I was told by the manager that he would review. I don't trust her review comments. She don't even know what the correct standard we are following.



That's a little more touchy, KK. Even though I would feel like saying, hey you fool.........you have to be more tactful. You might have to just pull her aside and tell her you thought it was this instead of this or something like that.

Part of your scenario sounds to me like you will just have to wait out the newness. Part of it makes me wonder if she isn't an idiot. Just bide you time, girl. If she is a clown, your time will come to show her up in a very tactful, yet important way, where everyone will notice.


innocent.gif I invited her to a meeting with the client that I'm running. And, I will politely reference the right standards. innocent.gif


just be careful about the reviewing your work, this should be a temporary thing I'm assuming because your new, don't let it become permanent...she probably feels threatned by you because your new. Try making her feel at ease,


If I just read all of this correctly and not knowing the field you're in....... could you go to your supervisor and say.... I just want to make sure that I have up-to-date information/standards or whatever term you would use .... and show him/her what you have been given. Then it would be up to your boss to make sure that everyone (ie that other goofball) has her correct info straight? Is your supervisor one to do something about issues ? or stand back and not take any heat ? Cause those types....argh !!

At my pt-time job my boss (he owns a financial planning business out of his home) just hired 2 new people in the last week. I've been there a little over 2 yrs and he's been through 3 people for that position. I am the one moving desks and having to be inconvenienced to say the least....but I tell him!!! The work that he hired for is VERY easy, but not busy work. The last chic (just quit)...24 yrs old, married to an "older man" (he's 38) and she's a step-mother to his autistic son (I've seen her with him....lets just say she needs ALOT of parenting classes --told me SHE doesn't want kids because that would take up all of HER free time!!!), and then she sucks her thumb !!!! She made a MILLION mistakes, but I made it known that since SHE was making the mistakes and it was reflecting my job and not getting done what "I" need to do to be productive. I'm only there a couple of hours a week, not doing my job AND her job!!!

So one of the employees (a woman) ....thinks SHE knows everything about anything !! I'm not sure how long she's going to last. When my boss called her references, warning flags by a couple of her last employers said, watch her attendance!!! Yesterday when I was there, she was complaining that she thought she was getting sick.....and she's only been there 4 days !!!!

Good luck ! It's a tough position to be in.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 17:13:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
USCIS Application and Receipting Update

U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) advises customers that, due to a tremendous increase in the number of applications filed, processing of fee payments and entry of cases into our tracking system is behind schedule. As a result, applicants can expect notices of receipt to be delayed. USCIS is working hard to deal with the increased volume.

Delay in fee processing and data entry will not affect an applicant's Change of Status or Extension of Stay eligibility if all other eligibility requiements are met. USCIS continues to process Premium Processing Service requests within 15 days.

USCIS will honor the actual date that an application was received in our mailroom; this date will be indicated on the receipt (in the Received Date box) when Form I-797, Notice of Action, is mailed. Until this situation is resolved, USCIS will provide these weekly updates on progress in issuing receipt notices to our customers. We appreciate your understanding.

As of September 7, 2007, USCIS has completed data entry and issued receipt notices for applications and petitions received on or before the dates indicated:

California Service Center
Form Number Date Received

I-130 8/07/2007
N-400 7/24/2007
All Other Forms 8/28/2007

Nebraska Service Center
Form Number Date Received

I-131 7/29/2007
I-140 7/29/2007
I-485 Employment
Based 7/29/2007
I-765 7/29/2007
N-400 7/25/2007
All Other Forms 8/05/2007

Texas Service Center
Form Number Date Received

I-131 7/02/2007
I-140 7/02/2007
I-485 Employment
Based 7/02/2007
I-765 7/02/2007
N-400 7/16/2007
All Other Forms 8/19/2007

Vermont Service Center
Form Number Date Received

I-130 7/26/2007
N-400 7/22/2007
All Other Forms 8/30/2007

USCIS Lockbox
Form Number Date Received

I-485 Family Based 8/15/2007
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 12:06:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
**OFF TOPIC** -- travel info -

American Airlines and United Airlines have dropped the points required for short-haul award tickets. On American, you’ll only need 15,000 miles (not the usual 25,000) for roundtrip nonstops of 750 miles or less (booked for travel by Feb. 29, 2008). Meanwhile, United will give award tickets for 15,000 points (not 25,000) for flights of 700 miles or less booked by Dec. 12 for travel through Dec. 14.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 11:58:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (12/11/2006 @ Sep 12 2007, 11:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (nannygirl82 @ Sep 12 2007, 09:11 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
well you would think with me being preggo things with mike would be different....but nah....i installed a spy program on the computer just to see what was really going on...and well ya he gave a girl on myspace his number...and telling her that she is sexy..not sure what i'm going to do.....


I'm so sorry to hear this. You definitely don't need to go through this especially because you are pregnant. Communication is key in this situation because as far as you know he hasn't officially cheated and maybe you wanna ask "why are you displaying interest in another person and especially at a time like this?" I would let him know that it's not acceptable at all. Does he have other children? Has he been through this process before because if its his first he should be excited about the baby and about you having the baby.

Men what do you do? Can't live it with em and can't live without em!!!


Maturity....key word and chattin with other women --is emotional cheating, which in my opinion is way worse than the physical !!!! We could repeat it a MILLION times that it is not acceptable, still does NOT sink in !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 11:20:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Sep 12 2007, 10:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Sep 12 2007, 08:25 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Well, until you have a child that goes through the system here..... you'll probably agree with what she said. My son has ADD (now called ADHD), but he's very very borderline. Middle school (6th through 8th grades) THE WORSE ever !!! They literally pushed him through!! I had him evaluated extensely in the beginning of this year because he was doing so poorly in school, just was struggling unbelievably (mostly because the teachers don't give a rats you know what!!). I would help him study for hours and he *knew* the material and would get into the class and totally fail.....so the pychologist tells me he has a learning disability i.e. NO long term retention. The reason being, is that from Kindergarten through 5th grade schools/teachers nowadays (well for the past 6-7 yrs) that they are taught for "short term tasks"....meaning they are NOT required to "memorize" anything before they go onto the next subject. For instance multiplication ....you do NOT "memorize" anymore. They go through the entire work in a week and if you don't know it....oh well, move on. So, when he got into 6th grade, everything he "learned" up till them....he had no memory of and basically was failing every class --that's when I had him evaluated for Attention Deficit. Then 7th grade, is a review of 6th grade...he got all A's & B's and then there was 8th grade...........shoot was THE worse because they are preparing you for high school and the "memory" of everything up to that point. My son STILL does not know (or remember) his "x" tables. He has a hard time "remembering" the flippin months of the year (in order). He used to remember the trips (and details) that we've been on..... not anymore. There is no long term memory !!

His last report card for middle school (the one that comes home in the mail -this summer) ...he got 3 D's (and one was an E, but she moved it up a point to make it a D), 3 C's and one B (in PE) and they passed him....no questions asked......nothing!!!! In our county you are not "allowed" to be passed to the 9th grade if you have any D's (or lower). I was in his middle soooo much the flippin janitors all know me. I met with his teachers on numerous occassions. It was ridiculous !!

SO, there was no way that I wanted him to go into high school ...continuing this way. I met with the Special Ed teacher over the summer and she "assured" me that Austin would have a very smooth transition. When I went to orientation the Friday before school started..."I" was soooooo darn excited to see that they DID do everything for him to make it less stressful, complicated and whatever else you wanna call it. His 1st period class has only 5 kids in it and it's called a "Tutorial", basically a refresher class and the teacher helps with ANY assignments they need help with, or questions with homework for any class. Second period, he has the Varsity soccer coach and he doesn't play....but doesn't give homework. Third period....health. Fourth/5th period Math -- double dose and 2 teachers and only 15 kids. Sixth period-English --only 11 kids and 2 teachers and then he's in Spanish Honors with only 16 kids (since he passed Spanish the past 2 yrs).

He LOVES high school, LOVES all of his teachers (so far). It has been a total nightmare up to this point! Now there's another huge incentive, he canNOT get anything lower than a C (or maintain a 2.0 or higher) grade average to play sports!!! That could also be keeping him very motivated!!!

Sorry for the long post ............but, you just wait. I can only imagine what the school system (especially public school) is going to be like in 4-5 yrs !!!!!

I can only hope that the educational system will improve in the US. Both my sisters are middle school teachers - math and science. When my sister (the math teacher) told me that the administration "encouraged" her to pass a failing student so that he can move on to the high school. When asked why she should send this student unprepared on to high school, the response was, he can't drop out in middle school, but he can do that in high school. That floored me! mad.gif


Yea...the whole "no child left behind" TOTAL and absolute joke !!! I know soooo many children (boys and girls) that can read, but canNOT comprehend (my child included) what they've just read !!! I've tried eeeeverything, went to an educational center (which was great), but just couldn't afford it anymore. I've read to him since he was an infant. I'm huge on reading and read all of the time. Sunday mornings....when no soccer, let me have my cup of coffee (or 2) read and catch up!! My son asked me when he got his schedule for HS..... do I have a reading class? I said, nope....doesn't happen after middle school !!! I told him that I still want him reading every day/night and then writing a small paragraph about what he just read. Yeah, okay....when there's time and he has the energy !!

Getting off the subject a little....it amazes me.... he's up at 6:30am, school starts at 7:25am. Eats lunch at 11 or 11:30am (depending on the day). Has soccer *right* after school at 2:30pm-5pm. Now yesterday they had their 1st away game for soccer. They are not allowed to leave school, because a bus picks them up (times vary) for their 4pm game. Then they *have* to sit and watch the Varsity game. I didn't pick him up from school till 7:45pm !!! He had a small snack that I put in his bag.....but shoot, he doesn't get to really eat until he gets home !!! They have a concession stand at the HS, but it's all junk ......Unbelievable... so eating and homework is to happen ???
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 09:52:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Sep 11 2007, 03:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Sep 11 2007, 03:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Sep 11 2007, 03:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Fi real!!! Last night our topic of conversation was poor Empress' issue!! He doesn't really smoke...but I wanted to reiterate...just in case! Again...I got..."Ooman,yuh Mad a who? Nuh suh, mi sorry fi deh Sistren, she deserve better than dat. But dat nuh guh reach we!!! I need fi inna deh States wid mi wife & family!!"

I am just so grateful that people here share the good as well as the bad...so others can learn from them!

Totally agree. Called hubby at lunchtime and told him. He said the same thing.


I am stressing now over the second hand weed smoke i know u guys said not to worry but if around it all day with friends i cant see how it would not enter ur system his friend was just smoking in the car i ask him not too! he still did and fiance said nothing which kkinda piss me off! its like he dont think and hes so stubborn he think he know it all sometimes but something so serious as passing ur medical and gettin the visa so we can be togher id stay as far away from tht stuff as possible


The medical test is blood. I'm not a smoker, never been there done that. I was just reading up on 2nd hand smoke and ganga ---

Second-hand marijuana smoke — buzz producing, or not — can leave traces of the chemical tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) in your urine for a day or so after breathing the smoke. Usually, the amount is not enough to make you test positive. Most drug tests have intentionally high standards to avoid false positive results due to incidental ingestion of second-hand smoke.

Hair testing (which is rarely done because the results are not as reliable as results from urine tests) can give information about someone's drug use over a longer time period, say a month or so, rather than just a few days (for most drugs), or a few weeks (with heavy marijuana smoking, for example).

By the way, in order for you to test positive for THC, the marijuana smoke would have to be so thick that it would irritate the eyes of smokers and passive smoke breathers alike. Avoiding smoke-filled cars, unventilated rooms, and other enclosed smoky spaces can help ensure that you can hang out while your friends toke and still be clean for bugle call in the morning.

Other info --
Irrespective of body size, the degree of second hand exposure is influenced by one or more of the following: size of the room or space you occupy, air circulation and quantity of smoke in the air, duration of time you are exposed and potency of the marijuana.

Exposure to second hand smoke can cause a drug test to be positive. A “contact high” indicates that THC has entered the blood stream where it is then detectable by drug analysis. If you do not feel “high” after exposure this does not mean that you are necessarily THC free.

If the exposure is inconsistent, the guidelines for minimal use apply and you can expect to be “clean” in approximately 10 days, possible fewer. If you have prolonged exposure (e.g. living with a frequent user), THC may be detectable for as long as a month.

Hope this helps...
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 07:35:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (AlienUKGirl @ Sep 12 2007, 08:13 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Sep 12 2007, 04:28 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Sep 11 2007, 09:51 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Yuh dyam right...again!! Preach, Preach Sis! I would move home inna heartbeat if I couldda live inna JA deh life I live 'ere! I always seh I would LOVE fi send mi pickney dem to school inna JA. Believe it on not, it is a much better educational system den the one here!

We've had this discussion on here before and I totally disagree with you. yes.gif What are you basing this off of? You can get an education ONLY IF you can afford to pay for school, pay for books, pay for uniforms, and pay to get to and from school. Here in the U.S. education is free to everyone. Not to mention, the standards are a lot different. My husband went up through 10th grade and can barely read and write. Here, you wouldn't even get past 2nd grade without these basic skills.

I went to school in Jamaica.
When I went back to England, I was shocked and amazed at how backward a lot of the people were who went to school in England.
From my own personal experience, I would say my education in Jamaica was FAR better than a lot of people in England received.


I remember one time when we were in Jamaica, my son was in the 2nd grade and there was a little Jamaican girl that was staying at the hotel with family. She was doing some homework (she was 5 yrs old) and I asked if she could show me her notebook in what she was working on.....I was SHOCKED that she was doing work (math) that my son was just beginning to learn in the 2nd grade!! She was a smart little cookie. My son is very street smart.....not book smart.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 07:29:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Sep 12 2007, 04:28 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Sep 11 2007, 09:51 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Yuh dyam right...again!! Preach, Preach Sis! I would move home inna heartbeat if I couldda live inna JA deh life I live 'ere! I always seh I would LOVE fi send mi pickney dem to school inna JA. Believe it on not, it is a much better educational system den the one here!

We've had this discussion on here before and I totally disagree with you. yes.gif What are you basing this off of? You can get an education ONLY IF you can afford to pay for school, pay for books, pay for uniforms, and pay to get to and from school. Here in the U.S. education is free to everyone. Not to mention, the standards are a lot different. My husband went up through 10th grade and can barely read and write. Here, you wouldn't even get past 2nd grade without these basic skills.



Well, until you have a child that goes through the system here..... you'll probably agree with what she said. My son has ADD (now called ADHD), but he's very very borderline. Middle school (6th through 8th grades) THE WORSE ever !!! They literally pushed him through!! I had him evaluated extensely in the beginning of this year because he was doing so poorly in school, just was struggling unbelievably (mostly because the teachers don't give a rats you know what!!). I would help him study for hours and he *knew* the material and would get into the class and totally fail.....so the pychologist tells me he has a learning disability i.e. NO long term retention. The reason being, is that from Kindergarten through 5th grade schools/teachers nowadays (well for the past 6-7 yrs) that they are taught for "short term tasks"....meaning they are NOT required to "memorize" anything before they go onto the next subject. For instance multiplication ....you do NOT "memorize" anymore. They go through the entire work in a week and if you don't know it....oh well, move on. So, when he got into 6th grade, everything he "learned" up till them....he had no memory of and basically was failing every class --that's when I had him evaluated for Attention Deficit. Then 7th grade, is a review of 6th grade...he got all A's & B's and then there was 8th grade...........shoot was THE worse because they are preparing you for high school and the "memory" of everything up to that point. My son STILL does not know (or remember) his "x" tables. He has a hard time "remembering" the flippin months of the year (in order). He used to remember the trips (and details) that we've been on..... not anymore. There is no long term memory !!

His last report card for middle school (the one that comes home in the mail -this summer) ...he got 3 D's (and one was an E, but she moved it up a point to make it a D), 3 C's and one B (in PE) and they passed him....no questions asked......nothing!!!! In our county you are not "allowed" to be passed to the 9th grade if you have any D's (or lower). I was in his middle soooo much the flippin janitors all know me. I met with his teachers on numerous occassions. It was ridiculous !!

SO, there was no way that I wanted him to go into high school ...continuing this way. I met with the Special Ed teacher over the summer and she "assured" me that Austin would have a very smooth transition. When I went to orientation the Friday before school started..."I" was soooooo darn excited to see that they DID do everything for him to make it less stressful, complicated and whatever else you wanna call it. His 1st period class has only 5 kids in it and it's called a "Tutorial", basically a refresher class and the teacher helps with ANY assignments they need help with, or questions with homework for any class. Second period, he has the Varsity soccer coach and he doesn't play....but doesn't give homework. Third period....health. Fourth/5th period Math -- double dose and 2 teachers and only 15 kids. Sixth period-English --only 11 kids and 2 teachers and then he's in Spanish Honors with only 16 kids (since he passed Spanish the past 2 yrs).

He LOVES high school, LOVES all of his teachers (so far). It has been a total nightmare up to this point! Now there's another huge incentive, he canNOT get anything lower than a C (or maintain a 2.0 or higher) grade average to play sports!!! That could also be keeping him very motivated!!!

Sorry for the long post ............but, you just wait. I can only imagine what the school system (especially public school) is going to be like in 4-5 yrs !!!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-12 07:25:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 14 2007, 08:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 14 2007, 06:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**OFF TOPIC** (but gosh what isn't?)

VENTING and question for you guys ....

Craig's brother got married (in the *real* ceremony to an american woman) this weekend in Philly. I didn't know anything about it until about 2 weeks ago. We never received an actual invitation. Craig was his brothers best man. His brother, over the phone last week Wed asked me if I was coming. I asked him....when, where, what time, I would need to find a sitter for my son (didn't sound like my sound was invited...at least his brother didn't say...bring him) just a bunch of questions....and he could not (or chose not) to answer any of them......sorry, but I wasn't going to be able to make it...

SO, I get a call from Craig's father today....TELLING me that Craig was going to stay late and when "I" would need to pick him up at the bus station. I said, sorry sir, but that is not an option ...Craig and I discussed that the 8:20pm bus would be the latest for me to go DOWNTOWN Baltimore to get him. Then he asked me if "I" knew his name and then said that they were at a "family" function ....and I said, okaaay??? His father is "controlling" and has NEVER been in Craig's life. Craig is the product of an affair that his father had. He's been living in Philly for a year and **now** just calls me (and he's never once called Craig since he's been here)???? Anyway, "daddy" asks if Craig could come home tomorrow and I said, it doesn't matter to me when he comes home as long as he has a ride from the bus station since I'll be working and then I need to pick up my son from soccer practice. So then he asks if I could speak to his Auntie...........not wanting to............I said, sure. So she gets on the phone and says (rudely) WHY AREN'T YOU AT THE WEDDING ??!! I wanted to go off, but nicely I said, I didn't know anything about it until 2 weeks ago, my son has obligations on the weekend, we don't have anyone that could watch our cats..... she could have CARED less what I said.... I was pretty ticked....

Anyway, question that I have is..... should we have been sent a wedding invitation? I mean 150 people were coming to the wedding!! Craig had no clue what his brothers wife's name is.


I'm sorry, as Whitney would say..."HELL TO THE YEAH", you should have had an invitation!!! What deh hell they tek dis thing for ??? Especially having never met you!

Trust me it's so not you...it's THEM!! I would have told Craig's father, Auntie, brother, Sister, Granny, or dawg...the same thing! I am in no way travelling into Baltimore, put myself and my child at risk, that time of night to pick up anyone! Since they feel so strongly about him staying then, send him home with cab fare! Plus, why didn't Craig call himself...why are you playing 'Operator' with family members?

I don't mean to insult you, I know I don't know you and I am SO not trying to get into your business...but in the future let hubby know don't send no boddi fi duh his dutty work! He wants to ask you something...then HE should ask! You married a MAN, not a child!

And his Father and Auntie are dyam outta order! mad.gif Dyam facety bunch!

my 2 cents...blessed- heart.gif Gill


I've met Craig's brother...last May when I went down for the interview and hung out with him for 48 hours.....but still.....invitation in writing ???!!!!! What trying to save flippin 41 cents ???!! TOTAL FLIPPIN BS !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-14 20:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (sjb1221 @ Oct 14 2007, 08:15 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jamerican @ Oct 14 2007, 07:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 14 2007, 03:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**OFF TOPIC** (but gosh what isn't?)

VENTING and question for you guys ....

Craig's brother got married (in the *real* ceremony to an american woman) this weekend in Philly. I didn't know anything about it until about 2 weeks ago. We never received an actual invitation. Craig was his brothers best man. His brother, over the phone last week Wed asked me if I was coming. I asked him....when, where, what time, I would need to find a sitter for my son (didn't sound like my sound was invited...at least his brother didn't say...bring him) just a bunch of questions....and he could not (or chose not) to answer any of them......sorry, but I wasn't going to be able to make it...

SO, I get a call from Craig's father today....TELLING me that Craig was going to stay late and when "I" would need to pick him up at the bus station. I said, sorry sir, but that is not an option ...Craig and I discussed that the 8:20pm bus would be the latest for me to go DOWNTOWN Baltimore to get him. Then he asked me if "I" knew his name and then said that they were at a "family" function ....and I said, okaaay??? His father is "controlling" and has NEVER been in Craig's life. Craig is the product of an affair that his father had. He's been living in Philly for a year and **now** just calls me (and he's never once called Craig since he's been here)???? Anyway, "daddy" asks if Craig could come home tomorrow and I said, it doesn't matter to me when he comes home as long as he has a ride from the bus station since I'll be working and then I need to pick up my son from soccer practice. So then he asks if I could speak to his Auntie...........not wanting to............I said, sure. So she gets on the phone and says (rudely) WHY AREN'T YOU AT THE WEDDING ??!! I wanted to go off, but nicely I said, I didn't know anything about it until 2 weeks ago, my son has obligations on the weekend, we don't have anyone that could watch our cats..... she could have CARED less what I said.... I was pretty ticked....

Anyway, question that I have is..... should we have been sent a wedding invitation? I mean 150 people were coming to the wedding!! Craig had no clue what his brothers wife's name is.



My question is why wasn't craig calling you to discuss this??? You shouldn't have to go through family to discuss your and craig's plans.


Right. And why didn't Craig tell you about the wedding before two weeks ago? Have you talked to Craig since you talked to his father?


Exactly !!!!! Not exactly sure what he was (or wasn't) thinking. Yep, I've spoken to him several times. He "missed" the early bus and now he's on the late bus.....withOUT a ride home.......NOT my problem. He's called several times, saying he doesn't have money, blah blah blah blah....whatever....he knows I'm pissed about this entire weekend (and lack of phone calls---ie letting me know he got there safe )!!!! I told him about 30 min ago ...why didn't HE have the balls to stand up to "his family" and tell them....my WIFE is picking me up at such and such and that he HAS to be at the bus station at 5pm!!! Meanwhile, he says....we were at a "family" dinner and I'm like...............AND ???!!!!






QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 14 2007, 08:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 14 2007, 06:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**OFF TOPIC** (but gosh what isn't?)

VENTING and question for you guys ....

Craig's brother got married (in the *real* ceremony to an american woman) this weekend in Philly. I didn't know anything about it until about 2 weeks ago. We never received an actual invitation. Craig was his brothers best man. His brother, over the phone last week Wed asked me if I was coming. I asked him....when, where, what time, I would need to find a sitter for my son (didn't sound like my sound was invited...at least his brother didn't say...bring him) just a bunch of questions....and he could not (or chose not) to answer any of them......sorry, but I wasn't going to be able to make it...

SO, I get a call from Craig's father today....TELLING me that Craig was going to stay late and when "I" would need to pick him up at the bus station. I said, sorry sir, but that is not an option ...Craig and I discussed that the 8:20pm bus would be the latest for me to go DOWNTOWN Baltimore to get him. Then he asked me if "I" knew his name and then said that they were at a "family" function ....and I said, okaaay??? His father is "controlling" and has NEVER been in Craig's life. Craig is the product of an affair that his father had. He's been living in Philly for a year and **now** just calls me (and he's never once called Craig since he's been here)???? Anyway, "daddy" asks if Craig could come home tomorrow and I said, it doesn't matter to me when he comes home as long as he has a ride from the bus station since I'll be working and then I need to pick up my son from soccer practice. So then he asks if I could speak to his Auntie...........not wanting to............I said, sure. So she gets on the phone and says (rudely) WHY AREN'T YOU AT THE WEDDING ??!! I wanted to go off, but nicely I said, I didn't know anything about it until 2 weeks ago, my son has obligations on the weekend, we don't have anyone that could watch our cats..... she could have CARED less what I said.... I was pretty ticked....

Anyway, question that I have is..... should we have been sent a wedding invitation? I mean 150 people were coming to the wedding!! Craig had no clue what his brothers wife's name is.


I'm sorry, as Whitney would say..."HELL TO THE YEAH", you should have had an invitation!!! What deh hell they tek dis thing for ??? Especially having never met you!

Trust me it's so not you...it's THEM!! I would have told Craig's father, Auntie, brother, Sister, Granny, or dawg...the same thing! I am in no way travelling into Baltimore, put myself and my child at risk, that time of night to pick up anyone! Since they feel so strongly about him staying then, send him home with cab fare! Plus, why didn't Craig call himself...why are you playing 'Operator' with family members?

I don't mean to insult you, I know I don't know you and I am SO not trying to get into your business...but in the future let hubby know don't send no boddi fi duh his dutty work! He wants to ask you something...then HE should ask! You married a MAN, not a child!

And his Father and Auntie are dyam outta order! mad.gif Dyam facety bunch!

my 2 cents...blessed- heart.gif Gill


No insults taken here at all. I truly appreciate your honesty !!! "I" know I'm not crazy and "I" completely think it's soooo out of line what his family did !!! I can ONLY imagine the conversation they had when I got off the phone with Auntie !!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-14 20:12:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (jamerican @ Oct 14 2007, 07:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 14 2007, 03:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
**OFF TOPIC** (but gosh what isn't?)

VENTING and question for you guys ....

Craig's brother got married (in the *real* ceremony to an american woman) this weekend in Philly. I didn't know anything about it until about 2 weeks ago. We never received an actual invitation. Craig was his brothers best man. His brother, over the phone last week Wed asked me if I was coming. I asked him....when, where, what time, I would need to find a sitter for my son (didn't sound like my sound was invited...at least his brother didn't say...bring him) just a bunch of questions....and he could not (or chose not) to answer any of them......sorry, but I wasn't going to be able to make it...

SO, I get a call from Craig's father today....TELLING me that Craig was going to stay late and when "I" would need to pick him up at the bus station. I said, sorry sir, but that is not an option ...Craig and I discussed that the 8:20pm bus would be the latest for me to go DOWNTOWN Baltimore to get him. Then he asked me if "I" knew his name and then said that they were at a "family" function ....and I said, okaaay??? His father is "controlling" and has NEVER been in Craig's life. Craig is the product of an affair that his father had. He's been living in Philly for a year and **now** just calls me (and he's never once called Craig since he's been here)???? Anyway, "daddy" asks if Craig could come home tomorrow and I said, it doesn't matter to me when he comes home as long as he has a ride from the bus station since I'll be working and then I need to pick up my son from soccer practice. So then he asks if I could speak to his Auntie...........not wanting to............I said, sure. So she gets on the phone and says (rudely) WHY AREN'T YOU AT THE WEDDING ??!! I wanted to go off, but nicely I said, I didn't know anything about it until 2 weeks ago, my son has obligations on the weekend, we don't have anyone that could watch our cats..... she could have CARED less what I said.... I was pretty ticked....

Anyway, question that I have is..... should we have been sent a wedding invitation? I mean 150 people were coming to the wedding!! Craig had no clue what his brothers wife's name is.



My question is why wasn't craig calling you to discuss this??? You shouldn't have to go through family to discuss your and craig's plans.


Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight !!!! I'm not quit sure why they ALL think that "our" business is supposed to be a group discussion !!! It's absolutely and totally Bulls*** and his brother called me last night.... 1st ???
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-14 19:00:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
**OFF TOPIC** (but gosh what isn't?)

VENTING and question for you guys ....

Craig's brother got married (in the *real* ceremony to an american woman) this weekend in Philly. I didn't know anything about it until about 2 weeks ago. We never received an actual invitation. Craig was his brothers best man. His brother, over the phone last week Wed asked me if I was coming. I asked him....when, where, what time, I would need to find a sitter for my son (didn't sound like my sound was invited...at least his brother didn't say...bring him) just a bunch of questions....and he could not (or chose not) to answer any of them......sorry, but I wasn't going to be able to make it...

SO, I get a call from Craig's father today....TELLING me that Craig was going to stay late and when "I" would need to pick him up at the bus station. I said, sorry sir, but that is not an option ...Craig and I discussed that the 8:20pm bus would be the latest for me to go DOWNTOWN Baltimore to get him. Then he asked me if "I" knew his name and then said that they were at a "family" function ....and I said, okaaay??? His father is "controlling" and has NEVER been in Craig's life. Craig is the product of an affair that his father had. He's been living in Philly for a year and **now** just calls me (and he's never once called Craig since he's been here)???? Anyway, "daddy" asks if Craig could come home tomorrow and I said, it doesn't matter to me when he comes home as long as he has a ride from the bus station since I'll be working and then I need to pick up my son from soccer practice. So then he asks if I could speak to his Auntie...........not wanting to............I said, sure. So she gets on the phone and says (rudely) WHY AREN'T YOU AT THE WEDDING ??!! I wanted to go off, but nicely I said, I didn't know anything about it until 2 weeks ago, my son has obligations on the weekend, we don't have anyone that could watch our cats..... she could have CARED less what I said.... I was pretty ticked....

Anyway, question that I have is..... should we have been sent a wedding invitation? I mean 150 people were coming to the wedding!! Craig had no clue what his brothers wife's name is.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-14 17:38:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (USA-Jamaica @ Oct 14 2007, 01:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 14 2007, 12:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi everybody! thanks for your well wishes and encouragement it means alot to me im just gettin myself together today im gonna go in town have a good day the rain has cleared it was sunny today and yesterday. The day i get here Chris decides to say that hes not ready to get married. Im like when did u plan on sayin this. helpsmilie.gif

IM prayin that everyone get their interview dates soon!!! have a blessed day everyone good.gif


Kim,

I will keep you in my prayer. Marriage is huge responibility that anyone who enter into it must be sure. If Chris is telling you he does not want to get marry. Please listen to him. Some things you can talk people into doing but you never want to talk a man into marriage. My advice is just to listen to Chris and hear what he is saying to you. PM me if you want to talk.

Jenice


I absolutely agree 100% !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-14 15:44:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 11 2007, 03:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 11 2007, 03:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 11 2007, 02:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 11 2007, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 10 2007, 07:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 10 2007, 08:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Oct 10 2007, 04:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 9 2007, 03:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They went on and on about their fine "boyfriends" and everything that happened on the trip. I asked how long that had been with their boyfriends...and all of them admitted that this was their first trip to Jamaica. When I asked them how they dealt with the attention from gigalos...they all looked at me like I had two heads and said what gigalos?

Oh boy unsure.gif I can already see how this is going to end. It's sad but I see it happen all the time while I'm down there. Last time, a guy on the beach was trying to get ME to give him money - even after I pointed out my JA husband napping on a nearby lounge chair wacko.gif He wanted me to sneak him $20 so he could get home. I told him to take a Juta bus or route taxi and no way would it cost him $20! laughing.gif That got rid of him!!


I have talked to a lot of men that have decided on this way of life in Ochi...of course most are gone now (some moved away to Kingston...got greencards...got ship work...or were actually murdered sad.gif ). After the inital approach and me letting them know that it wasn't going down...we actually had some very enlightening conversations. I have watched some of them "work" and watched the women come and go...and be replaced by other women sometimes on the same trip. The men often have several women at one time that live in the US or Canada or the UK. I have tried talking to some of the ladies...but to no avail. It is amazing how defensive women can get when potential love is threatened. I don't try to tell the women that their relationship is not real...just try to have casual conversation about the possibility of meeting a hustler...and I get treated like I'm a man thief or something. The hustlers that I got to know over several trips, looked out for me, and let the "newbies" know that I wasn't buying. LOL

I have not had the best experiences in Jamaica either. I have almost been raped...three times. I have been called a lesbian...you name it. Some of the men can't believe that a woman (single or married) would return again and again and not be looking for the "hood". At one point, my bad experiences just trying to come to a place that I loved outweighed the good experiences and I made up my mind never to return. I am still deathly afraid of using a taxi driver that I don't know (even if a friend recommends them)...I won't do jet ski rides that require alone time with the guy...and will not visit the beach alone at dusk. Other than those precautions...I decided not to let a few bad mind people ruin something that truly brings me joy and peace in my life.

The guys I met years ago were much more civil and respectful...and actually respected me when I gave them a polite no...but was always open to conversation. The guys now are a lot more aggressive and angry and hostile....a fuse waiting to blow. So, I mind my business now and I don't talk to the women that are love interests at all now or the hustlers after the initial not interested. sad.gif

I love my country and my country-men, but some of them can be so "ignorant". In their minds they are God's gift to women and how dare you rebuff their advances. Dem can call mi stuck up (though of course they will call you worse), but mi nah give dem de time of day, especially when them ready fi class yu because yu nuh talk to dem.

Jawi, I don't blame you for being as cautious as you are. A lot of people go on vacation and take down the guard that they regularly have, which will keep them away from danger (Natalie Holloway + a female journalist who went missing in Jamaica). As a tourist, you think the natives will take care of you, but too much bad mind people out deh. Yu haffi careful. I hope I never fall into that tourist trap and listen to my instincts.


I tell all of my clients that when you go away so a place you've never been and let your guard down....ever !

I know ALOT of people in Negril, from the locals (especially the beach area) to management staff at many of the hotels. When we (me, my son, my best friend and her husband) were in Negril 2 1/2 yrs ago ....my friend and husband were robbed at knife point on the beach....45 min before me, my son and Craig walked past the *same* area. She told everyone that we know in the area, about the incident and they were in shock! My best friend and I have been traveling to Jamaica for 10 1/2 yrs and her husband only goes once a year and is WAAAAY friendly. That particular night he had walked back to the room a couple of times and later we found out that he "made conversation" with some boys on the beach (that he didn't know) and we think that they are the ones that robbed them. My friend didn't recognize these young boys at all. Unfortunately it has left a terrible taste in their mouths that they haven't been back to visit since!!!

I've only been treated with disrespect by 2 losers in the 26x that I've been going to Jamaica and I just told them basically where to stick it !!!! The "gigalos" on the beach in Negril know me ...and have never approached me, from day one, with disrespect. I don't get bothered by anyone when I walk down the beach....ever. They've never asked me to buy ganga, or to buy this that or the other. Now, my best friend gets stalked by everyone cause she buys EVERYthing in sight and they think "she has money"!!! My son knows sooooo many darn people from all the years of playing soccer and volleyball on the beach, I feel like I'm with a flippin celebrity when we go for walks or out at night !! He goes to the bars at night with us and even some of the "ladies of the night" now know him....it's funny. They do not approach him, just rub his head and say hi ! Next trip, I'll have to keep a VERY close eye on those ladies...since he'll be 14 yrs old ! He hasn't been in 2 yrs .....and he's buggin the heck out of me as to when we're gonna go back !!!

Soon come, I say !


Meant to say.........don't EVER let your guard down !!!!!


Good advice no matter where you are. I was more scared in Washington, D.C. in June then I have ever been in Jamaica.


Shoot my good jamaican friend (that I've known for 9 yrs from the beach area of Negril) lives in Baltimore City and when he 1st moved here 4 yrs ago, me and my son went down to his house to pick him up and take him to a soccer game......"I" was SCARED out of my mind!!!! We made a wrong turn....that was NOT a good idea. I called my friend and was like, get me the f** out of here !!! and he said, why....what's wrong ??? Then he wanted me (and my son) to come in and meet his wife and my son said, we **have** to get out of the car???? I will only go there now, in the daylight ....when everyone is sleeping !!!


Oh and I took Craig to his house last year....and Craig was like, now this is where I wanna live and I'm like....wha ???? You're CRAZY !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-11 14:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 11 2007, 03:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 11 2007, 02:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 11 2007, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 10 2007, 07:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 10 2007, 08:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Oct 10 2007, 04:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 9 2007, 03:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They went on and on about their fine "boyfriends" and everything that happened on the trip. I asked how long that had been with their boyfriends...and all of them admitted that this was their first trip to Jamaica. When I asked them how they dealt with the attention from gigalos...they all looked at me like I had two heads and said what gigalos?

Oh boy unsure.gif I can already see how this is going to end. It's sad but I see it happen all the time while I'm down there. Last time, a guy on the beach was trying to get ME to give him money - even after I pointed out my JA husband napping on a nearby lounge chair wacko.gif He wanted me to sneak him $20 so he could get home. I told him to take a Juta bus or route taxi and no way would it cost him $20! laughing.gif That got rid of him!!


I have talked to a lot of men that have decided on this way of life in Ochi...of course most are gone now (some moved away to Kingston...got greencards...got ship work...or were actually murdered sad.gif ). After the inital approach and me letting them know that it wasn't going down...we actually had some very enlightening conversations. I have watched some of them "work" and watched the women come and go...and be replaced by other women sometimes on the same trip. The men often have several women at one time that live in the US or Canada or the UK. I have tried talking to some of the ladies...but to no avail. It is amazing how defensive women can get when potential love is threatened. I don't try to tell the women that their relationship is not real...just try to have casual conversation about the possibility of meeting a hustler...and I get treated like I'm a man thief or something. The hustlers that I got to know over several trips, looked out for me, and let the "newbies" know that I wasn't buying. LOL

I have not had the best experiences in Jamaica either. I have almost been raped...three times. I have been called a lesbian...you name it. Some of the men can't believe that a woman (single or married) would return again and again and not be looking for the "hood". At one point, my bad experiences just trying to come to a place that I loved outweighed the good experiences and I made up my mind never to return. I am still deathly afraid of using a taxi driver that I don't know (even if a friend recommends them)...I won't do jet ski rides that require alone time with the guy...and will not visit the beach alone at dusk. Other than those precautions...I decided not to let a few bad mind people ruin something that truly brings me joy and peace in my life.

The guys I met years ago were much more civil and respectful...and actually respected me when I gave them a polite no...but was always open to conversation. The guys now are a lot more aggressive and angry and hostile....a fuse waiting to blow. So, I mind my business now and I don't talk to the women that are love interests at all now or the hustlers after the initial not interested. sad.gif

I love my country and my country-men, but some of them can be so "ignorant". In their minds they are God's gift to women and how dare you rebuff their advances. Dem can call mi stuck up (though of course they will call you worse), but mi nah give dem de time of day, especially when them ready fi class yu because yu nuh talk to dem.

Jawi, I don't blame you for being as cautious as you are. A lot of people go on vacation and take down the guard that they regularly have, which will keep them away from danger (Natalie Holloway + a female journalist who went missing in Jamaica). As a tourist, you think the natives will take care of you, but too much bad mind people out deh. Yu haffi careful. I hope I never fall into that tourist trap and listen to my instincts.


I tell all of my clients that when you go away so a place you've never been and let your guard down....ever !

I know ALOT of people in Negril, from the locals (especially the beach area) to management staff at many of the hotels. When we (me, my son, my best friend and her husband) were in Negril 2 1/2 yrs ago ....my friend and husband were robbed at knife point on the beach....45 min before me, my son and Craig walked past the *same* area. She told everyone that we know in the area, about the incident and they were in shock! My best friend and I have been traveling to Jamaica for 10 1/2 yrs and her husband only goes once a year and is WAAAAY friendly. That particular night he had walked back to the room a couple of times and later we found out that he "made conversation" with some boys on the beach (that he didn't know) and we think that they are the ones that robbed them. My friend didn't recognize these young boys at all. Unfortunately it has left a terrible taste in their mouths that they haven't been back to visit since!!!

I've only been treated with disrespect by 2 losers in the 26x that I've been going to Jamaica and I just told them basically where to stick it !!!! The "gigalos" on the beach in Negril know me ...and have never approached me, from day one, with disrespect. I don't get bothered by anyone when I walk down the beach....ever. They've never asked me to buy ganga, or to buy this that or the other. Now, my best friend gets stalked by everyone cause she buys EVERYthing in sight and they think "she has money"!!! My son knows sooooo many darn people from all the years of playing soccer and volleyball on the beach, I feel like I'm with a flippin celebrity when we go for walks or out at night !! He goes to the bars at night with us and even some of the "ladies of the night" now know him....it's funny. They do not approach him, just rub his head and say hi ! Next trip, I'll have to keep a VERY close eye on those ladies...since he'll be 14 yrs old ! He hasn't been in 2 yrs .....and he's buggin the heck out of me as to when we're gonna go back !!!

Soon come, I say !


Meant to say.........don't EVER let your guard down !!!!!


Good advice no matter where you are. I was more scared in Washington, D.C. in June then I have ever been in Jamaica.


Shoot my good jamaican friend (that I've known for 9 yrs from the beach area of Negril) lives in Baltimore City and when he 1st moved here 4 yrs ago, me and my son went down to his house to pick him up and take him to a soccer game......"I" was SCARED out of my mind!!!! We made a wrong turn....that was NOT a good idea. I called my friend and was like, get me the f** out of here !!! and he said, why....what's wrong ??? Then he wanted me (and my son) to come in and meet his wife and my son said, we **have** to get out of the car???? I will only go there now, in the daylight ....when everyone is sleeping !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-11 14:28:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 11 2007, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 10 2007, 07:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 10 2007, 08:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Oct 10 2007, 04:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 9 2007, 03:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They went on and on about their fine "boyfriends" and everything that happened on the trip. I asked how long that had been with their boyfriends...and all of them admitted that this was their first trip to Jamaica. When I asked them how they dealt with the attention from gigalos...they all looked at me like I had two heads and said what gigalos?

Oh boy unsure.gif I can already see how this is going to end. It's sad but I see it happen all the time while I'm down there. Last time, a guy on the beach was trying to get ME to give him money - even after I pointed out my JA husband napping on a nearby lounge chair wacko.gif He wanted me to sneak him $20 so he could get home. I told him to take a Juta bus or route taxi and no way would it cost him $20! laughing.gif That got rid of him!!


I have talked to a lot of men that have decided on this way of life in Ochi...of course most are gone now (some moved away to Kingston...got greencards...got ship work...or were actually murdered sad.gif ). After the inital approach and me letting them know that it wasn't going down...we actually had some very enlightening conversations. I have watched some of them "work" and watched the women come and go...and be replaced by other women sometimes on the same trip. The men often have several women at one time that live in the US or Canada or the UK. I have tried talking to some of the ladies...but to no avail. It is amazing how defensive women can get when potential love is threatened. I don't try to tell the women that their relationship is not real...just try to have casual conversation about the possibility of meeting a hustler...and I get treated like I'm a man thief or something. The hustlers that I got to know over several trips, looked out for me, and let the "newbies" know that I wasn't buying. LOL

I have not had the best experiences in Jamaica either. I have almost been raped...three times. I have been called a lesbian...you name it. Some of the men can't believe that a woman (single or married) would return again and again and not be looking for the "hood". At one point, my bad experiences just trying to come to a place that I loved outweighed the good experiences and I made up my mind never to return. I am still deathly afraid of using a taxi driver that I don't know (even if a friend recommends them)...I won't do jet ski rides that require alone time with the guy...and will not visit the beach alone at dusk. Other than those precautions...I decided not to let a few bad mind people ruin something that truly brings me joy and peace in my life.

The guys I met years ago were much more civil and respectful...and actually respected me when I gave them a polite no...but was always open to conversation. The guys now are a lot more aggressive and angry and hostile....a fuse waiting to blow. So, I mind my business now and I don't talk to the women that are love interests at all now or the hustlers after the initial not interested. sad.gif

I love my country and my country-men, but some of them can be so "ignorant". In their minds they are God's gift to women and how dare you rebuff their advances. Dem can call mi stuck up (though of course they will call you worse), but mi nah give dem de time of day, especially when them ready fi class yu because yu nuh talk to dem.

Jawi, I don't blame you for being as cautious as you are. A lot of people go on vacation and take down the guard that they regularly have, which will keep them away from danger (Natalie Holloway + a female journalist who went missing in Jamaica). As a tourist, you think the natives will take care of you, but too much bad mind people out deh. Yu haffi careful. I hope I never fall into that tourist trap and listen to my instincts.


I tell all of my clients that when you go away so a place you've never been and let your guard down....ever !

I know ALOT of people in Negril, from the locals (especially the beach area) to management staff at many of the hotels. When we (me, my son, my best friend and her husband) were in Negril 2 1/2 yrs ago ....my friend and husband were robbed at knife point on the beach....45 min before me, my son and Craig walked past the *same* area. She told everyone that we know in the area, about the incident and they were in shock! My best friend and I have been traveling to Jamaica for 10 1/2 yrs and her husband only goes once a year and is WAAAAY friendly. That particular night he had walked back to the room a couple of times and later we found out that he "made conversation" with some boys on the beach (that he didn't know) and we think that they are the ones that robbed them. My friend didn't recognize these young boys at all. Unfortunately it has left a terrible taste in their mouths that they haven't been back to visit since!!!

I've only been treated with disrespect by 2 losers in the 26x that I've been going to Jamaica and I just told them basically where to stick it !!!! The "gigalos" on the beach in Negril know me ...and have never approached me, from day one, with disrespect. I don't get bothered by anyone when I walk down the beach....ever. They've never asked me to buy ganga, or to buy this that or the other. Now, my best friend gets stalked by everyone cause she buys EVERYthing in sight and they think "she has money"!!! My son knows sooooo many darn people from all the years of playing soccer and volleyball on the beach, I feel like I'm with a flippin celebrity when we go for walks or out at night !! He goes to the bars at night with us and even some of the "ladies of the night" now know him....it's funny. They do not approach him, just rub his head and say hi ! Next trip, I'll have to keep a VERY close eye on those ladies...since he'll be 14 yrs old ! He hasn't been in 2 yrs .....and he's buggin the heck out of me as to when we're gonna go back !!!

Soon come, I say !


Meant to say.........don't EVER let your guard down !!!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-11 14:17:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 10 2007, 07:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 10 2007, 08:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Oct 10 2007, 04:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 9 2007, 03:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They went on and on about their fine "boyfriends" and everything that happened on the trip. I asked how long that had been with their boyfriends...and all of them admitted that this was their first trip to Jamaica. When I asked them how they dealt with the attention from gigalos...they all looked at me like I had two heads and said what gigalos?

Oh boy unsure.gif I can already see how this is going to end. It's sad but I see it happen all the time while I'm down there. Last time, a guy on the beach was trying to get ME to give him money - even after I pointed out my JA husband napping on a nearby lounge chair wacko.gif He wanted me to sneak him $20 so he could get home. I told him to take a Juta bus or route taxi and no way would it cost him $20! laughing.gif That got rid of him!!


I have talked to a lot of men that have decided on this way of life in Ochi...of course most are gone now (some moved away to Kingston...got greencards...got ship work...or were actually murdered sad.gif ). After the inital approach and me letting them know that it wasn't going down...we actually had some very enlightening conversations. I have watched some of them "work" and watched the women come and go...and be replaced by other women sometimes on the same trip. The men often have several women at one time that live in the US or Canada or the UK. I have tried talking to some of the ladies...but to no avail. It is amazing how defensive women can get when potential love is threatened. I don't try to tell the women that their relationship is not real...just try to have casual conversation about the possibility of meeting a hustler...and I get treated like I'm a man thief or something. The hustlers that I got to know over several trips, looked out for me, and let the "newbies" know that I wasn't buying. LOL

I have not had the best experiences in Jamaica either. I have almost been raped...three times. I have been called a lesbian...you name it. Some of the men can't believe that a woman (single or married) would return again and again and not be looking for the "hood". At one point, my bad experiences just trying to come to a place that I loved outweighed the good experiences and I made up my mind never to return. I am still deathly afraid of using a taxi driver that I don't know (even if a friend recommends them)...I won't do jet ski rides that require alone time with the guy...and will not visit the beach alone at dusk. Other than those precautions...I decided not to let a few bad mind people ruin something that truly brings me joy and peace in my life.

The guys I met years ago were much more civil and respectful...and actually respected me when I gave them a polite no...but was always open to conversation. The guys now are a lot more aggressive and angry and hostile....a fuse waiting to blow. So, I mind my business now and I don't talk to the women that are love interests at all now or the hustlers after the initial not interested. sad.gif

I love my country and my country-men, but some of them can be so "ignorant". In their minds they are God's gift to women and how dare you rebuff their advances. Dem can call mi stuck up (though of course they will call you worse), but mi nah give dem de time of day, especially when them ready fi class yu because yu nuh talk to dem.

Jawi, I don't blame you for being as cautious as you are. A lot of people go on vacation and take down the guard that they regularly have, which will keep them away from danger (Natalie Holloway + a female journalist who went missing in Jamaica). As a tourist, you think the natives will take care of you, but too much bad mind people out deh. Yu haffi careful. I hope I never fall into that tourist trap and listen to my instincts.


I tell all of my clients that when you go away so a place you've never been and let your guard down....ever !

I know ALOT of people in Negril, from the locals (especially the beach area) to management staff at many of the hotels. When we (me, my son, my best friend and her husband) were in Negril 2 1/2 yrs ago ....my friend and husband were robbed at knife point on the beach....45 min before me, my son and Craig walked past the *same* area. She told everyone that we know in the area, about the incident and they were in shock! My best friend and I have been traveling to Jamaica for 10 1/2 yrs and her husband only goes once a year and is WAAAAY friendly. That particular night he had walked back to the room a couple of times and later we found out that he "made conversation" with some boys on the beach (that he didn't know) and we think that they are the ones that robbed them. My friend didn't recognize these young boys at all. Unfortunately it has left a terrible taste in their mouths that they haven't been back to visit since!!!

I've only been treated with disrespect by 2 losers in the 26x that I've been going to Jamaica and I just told them basically where to stick it !!!! The "gigalos" on the beach in Negril know me ...and have never approached me, from day one, with disrespect. I don't get bothered by anyone when I walk down the beach....ever. They've never asked me to buy ganga, or to buy this that or the other. Now, my best friend gets stalked by everyone cause she buys EVERYthing in sight and they think "she has money"!!! My son knows sooooo many darn people from all the years of playing soccer and volleyball on the beach, I feel like I'm with a flippin celebrity when we go for walks or out at night !! He goes to the bars at night with us and even some of the "ladies of the night" now know him....it's funny. They do not approach him, just rub his head and say hi ! Next trip, I'll have to keep a VERY close eye on those ladies...since he'll be 14 yrs old ! He hasn't been in 2 yrs .....and he's buggin the heck out of me as to when we're gonna go back !!!

Soon come, I say !
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-11 14:16:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 9 2007, 01:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 9 2007, 11:56 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 9 2007, 12:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 9 2007, 11:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 9 2007, 12:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 9 2007, 11:28 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 9 2007, 12:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 9 2007, 11:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (shawn99 @ Oct 9 2007, 10:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Mi know sey, mi aaa nuff a yu a nuh fren pon ya. But mek mi tell you someting. When you people a guh a Jamaica nuh buss yu head fi charter no airline fi carry sinting fi nobody. Most Jamaicans down there dont have any conscience. Everybody want dis and dat like sey yu a bill gates. From dem hear America dem start tink bout money and expensive clothes and boot. Let dem know seh farrin a no bed a rose, and life hard up here. Down there all when yu a 100 year old yu mumma still lef dinner fi yu and sleep and live free.

Vex if yu want, but mi know sey nuff a yu mother-in-law wouldn't luv yu if yu did live a Jamaica, dem only want if know seh dem pickney a get a buss and dem a benefit, when dem si unnu dem start show teeth an want hug up an boast pon dem neighbor bout dem daughter in law from America. Mi have sister to and mi nuh want si nobody tek her fi a ride. Some a you pon here a get used, as soon as as di man get di unconditional greencard, dawg naym some a unnu suppa, ole time gal or baby madda from Jamaica tek over. Save unnu strength fi dem days and nuh badda fi trace mi. Remember mi nuh seh all a unnu. It can be 1 out a every 5.

All who a seh who trace mi off nuh have no sense, mi try fi show respect, but mi jus love to talk the truth, so who dont like it...who cares, cause dis bway nuff fraid a no man, no gal, nowhere, no time.

Blessings.


Wow !..u really di come a better this time. And i do agree with u on the whole bringing stuff down for people. And the whole use thing to greencard happens to some and it's sad that u really have to watch out for it especially if u didn't know him/her from Jamaica..And while u are to be honest..u don't have to come off so harsh...



Well, the reality is, the subject is harsh no matter how you look at it. I agree that warning is a good thing to at least read. If there are signs, heed them. I know some who have been taken and it is not a pretty thing. Shame on anyone who uses someone like that.

I do think, though, that sometimes Jamaicans take a beating on this subject. Of course we hear about the bad ones, caused the devestated spouse shouts warnings in anger from the rooftops. But, those who are happily married, just move on to their daily busy lives and leave the internet and web sites like this behind. There are many, many happily married couples involving Jamaicans and visa, as well. We just don't hear about it.

So, while I believe in heeding warnings and listen carefully to other's stories, I also believe in trusting my own instincts all the same.

Shawn, I am glad to see you on here today. You have started a conversation and have interesting things to say in an appropriate manner. Thank you for that.



Right..but to get a point across u don't have to stomp on everyone involved..that's all...It is a VERY TOUGH subject...and people should follow their gut feeling....[/color]


I know what you are saying. I think my problem with the whole subject is people tend to lump all Jamaicans into this using us to get a green card lump. And, we all know that isn't true. It's easy to get mad at one group of people....say Jamaican men.....or, hell, yesterday, Jamaican MIL's.....

[color="#9932CC"]Agree I don't like lumping either...it's anyone from anywhere
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-09 13:35:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 9 2007, 11:05 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (shawn99 @ Oct 9 2007, 09:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Mi know sey, mi aaa nuff a yu a nuh fren pon ya. But mek mi tell you someting. When you people a guh a Jamaica nuh buss yu head fi charter no airline fi carry sinting fi nobody. Most Jamaicans down there dont have any conscience. Everybody want dis and dat like sey yu a bill gates. From dem hear America dem start tink bout money and expensive clothes and boot. Let dem know seh farrin a no bed a rose, and life hard up here. Down there all when yu a 100 year old yu mumma still lef dinner fi yu and sleep and live free.

Vex if yu want, but mi know sey nuff a yu mother-in-law wouldn't luv yu if yu did live a Jamaica, dem only want if know seh dem pickney a get a buss and dem a benefit, when dem si unnu dem start show teeth an want hug up an boast pon dem neighbor bout dem daughter in law from America. Mi have sister to and mi nuh want si nobody tek her fi a ride. Some a you pon here a get used, as soon as as di man get di unconditional greencard, dawg naym some a unnu suppa, ole time gal or baby madda from Jamaica tek over. Save unnu strength fi dem days and nuh badda fi trace mi. Remember mi nuh seh all a unnu. It can be 1 out a every 5.

All who a seh who trace mi off nuh have no sense, mi try fi show respect, but mi jus love to talk the truth, so who dont like it...who cares, cause dis bway nuff fraid a no man, no gal, nowhere, no time.

Blessings.



While I hate to admit it, I am in agreement with you everything you said up until the green card statement.


I have to agree wholeheartedly with everything.....but not *all* people come a foreign for their GC. Yes it happens, but the woman/man has to have that in the very back of their head, especially for those that don't know their man/woman for a looooong period of time. Everything else, right on the money!!! Literally ...
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-09 10:11:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
[quote name='Deyoungting' date='Oct 9 2007, 08:26 AM' post='1244521']
[quote name='JA Tam' post='1243967' date='Oct 8 2007, 09:16 PM']offtopic45vn.gif How sad is it what happened in Washington? It is so scary...someone who is suppose to protect and serve taking the lives of so many young people sad.gif

Are you talking about what happened in Wisconsin? If so....yes, very horrible!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-09 09:12:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 8 2007, 04:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 8 2007, 03:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Belly @ Oct 8 2007, 03:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 8 2007, 03:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ok all...so we Finally went to go see my MIL...2wks ago..and BWOY she is something else. She is reminiscing about yrs ago from he was 10yrs old...I just said hello and kept it moving. She starts whispering, not saying it was about me but this is how rude she is. Then as we were leaving she is questioning him about us moving, and telling him "when i call u to come over just come" basicly no excuses. I over heard her telling him "oh mi soon caan see as much when u move" as if we are moving to washington. This lady drives me nuts. She he on his a** everywhere he turns. i hate to see her treat him like a child...Seriously I am gonna blow up, b4 I do do u guys have any suggestions on how I should bring this about to both of them..this has to be done wit all three of us. He says she will take things to heart and that's why he allows her to just do whatever. I told him, she knows exactly what she's doing..I CAN'T STAND IT..i told him that next time he can go by himself ..cause I can't deal mad.gif


I don't know what the best way to handle this is...I know everytime I take issue with the way my fiance's mom babies him or treats him it's like WW 10!! helpsmilie.gif ranting33va.gif protest6wz.gif A Jamaican man's relationship with his mother is a sensitive subject. I tread very lightly and it usually takes me days to figure out how to say things without it being such a problem.



Thank's girl...but why do I have to tread light and I am his freaking wife..as if that means nothing to her. Almost as if she expects him to do things w/o my knowledge..as if I'm just some freaking girl.i GUESS I'm just venting...He needs to get it 1st..if he allows her to continue, then she won't change.... ranting33va.gif


I don't tread lightly. I say how I feel. My MIL may be playing games; but I do not. I will not lie or try to play him to get what I want. And, I do point it out when she is doing that.

What I have found works best for me is to tell him exactly what I am thinking when I make some comment. For instance, his mom calls and wants money for something. If we don't have it, I tell him flat out, we don't have it. If we have some earmarked for something else, I say "well, you can't get that (whatever) you were eyeing" or "well, we can't go to the movies" or "we won't be able to have that oil change now" or whatver. Whatever is the truth. I've even said I don't like that she now calls every 2 weeks or I don't like doing this cause now she will expect it and you know we can't always do this. We've caught her in lies to play us and I really go off then.

I've gone so far as to tell him if she called that night, after we had a disappointing day, that I would take his cell phone outside and mash it up. (He took the battery out of the phone one night that I said that! whistling.gif )

Anyhow, my point is that I have found honesty is the best policy. If you don't tell him exactly what you are thinking, he can use that as an excuse against you later on. If you tell him, he can never claim he did not know.


QUOTE (USA-Jamaica @ Oct 8 2007, 03:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Belly @ Oct 8 2007, 03:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 8 2007, 03:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ok all...so we Finally went to go see my MIL...2wks ago..and BWOY she is something else. She is reminiscing about yrs ago from he was 10yrs old...I just said hello and kept it moving. She starts whispering, not saying it was about me but this is how rude she is. Then as we were leaving she is questioning him about us moving, and telling him "when i call u to come over just come" basicly no excuses. I over heard her telling him "oh mi soon caan see as much when u move" as if we are moving to washington. This lady drives me nuts. She he on his a** everywhere he turns. i hate to see her treat him like a child...Seriously I am gonna blow up, b4 I do do u guys have any suggestions on how I should bring this about to both of them..this has to be done wit all three of us. He says she will take things to heart and that's why he allows her to just do whatever. I told him, she knows exactly what she's doing..I CAN'T STAND IT..i told him that next time he can go by himself ..cause I can't deal mad.gif


I don't know what the best way to handle this is...I know everytime I take issue with the way my fiance's mom babies him or treats him it's like WW 10!! helpsmilie.gif ranting33va.gif protest6wz.gif A Jamaican man's relationship with his mother is a sensitive subject. I tread very lightly and it usually takes me days to figure out how to say things without it being such a problem.


I agree with Belly's Girl Try to limit your interaction with her for a while. If you explode your hubby will be put in the middle and I am willing to bet the MIL will act like the victim of the big bad daughter in law. We know he loves your dearly but it will be so hard for him if he has to chose sides.

Jenice


While that might work for some, it is not for me. People will play you if you let them.



I agree Kelly, I would do the same exact thing. Craig's mom is soooooooooooo darn sweet to me. She's very very nice and we like each other very much. It took about one full year (most recently) for Craig to FINALLY say to her, mom I just do NOT have the money to help you right now !!! I told him over and over and over again, you just HAVE to be honest and stop giving her the hope that money will be arriving when in reality it won't. The JA men and their mothers thing drives ME bananas !!! Craig's mother didn't raise him and she's only been back in his life for about 5 yrs and now "he" thinks "he" owes her ??? Don't get that one at all !!!

His mother had been calling every week at 10:00-10:30pm ....now that he's been honest, she calls every so often "just to see how he is doing" and to tell me and Austin, hello. He calls her on a calling card, but ....realizes it is expensive and it only depresses him hearing all that she doesn't have and *wants*. She's a hard worker, but spends spends spends !!! That apple does not fall far from the tree !

I've never been asked to bring anything, by anyone in the 10 yrs I've been going to Jamaica. I brought his mom ome a picture of Craig in a frame, one of my son and then the 3 of us and I put them in picture frames. She just sat and cried and thought that was wonderful. Just the little things. Whenever we get down there, I'll be bringing her more clothes....but....it's not going to be things that I've gone out to buy and I'm not "splurging" on the entire family. I'll bring items for the kids, what we have around the house that my son isn't using anymore.

Have a safe journey for all that are traveling ! I'm jealous mad.gif oh wait, not jealous about the whole interview process...cause don't miss THOSE feelings at all !!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-09 08:20:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 9 2007, 08:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JA Tam @ Oct 8 2007, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif How sad is it what happened in Washington? It is so scary...someone who is suppose to protect and serve taking the lives of so many young people sad.gif
Then Ms. Marion Jones --- WTH!!!! mad.gif


Very sad about Washington and I am very disappointed with Ms. Jones!! Does this mean that Jamaica would get gold in the 1600 relay? blink.gif There is such pressure for athletes to perform these days, but to what extent do you put your life, body and reputation on the line?? Seriously dyam shame!

Gill


Then they were saying on our TV station yesterday that if she gets stripped of her Relay medals...the whole entire US team does !!! That's just sooooo darn horrible AND for her to only think about herself --at that time. She needs to seriously go to an island where noone is 'round and that noone can find her for a looong time !!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-09 08:08:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 5 2007, 04:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 5 2007, 10:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif


It's Friday All..I'm sooooo happy..lonngggg drawnnn outttt weekkkk !

I am thinking about vacation next yr...I wanna go to Disney just to let my baby experience it...BUT she will still only be 2yrs old...Is that too young for her..would it make sense to take her..or just hop on a plane to JA..mi nah pay fi hotel nuttin..cause I was thinkin going to JA is going to cost too much..but if we limit our stay and visits smile.gif then maybe we can doing

What u'll think


I would think 2 is too young. At that age kids dont understand what they are seeing and most times the costumed characters will scare her to death! I worked at a place where I dressed in those costumes and most kids were freaked out by me and the parents would think it was funny and still try to force them te child on me. I think 4 is a good age to start that stuff, at least then the child has long term memory and will actually remember it in a year.


I've taken my son to Disney so many times, but the 1st time was when he was 2. He doesn't remember really anything about that trip, but barely remembers (details) from 3 yrs ago when we went or gets confused because he's been fortunate enough to go a bunch of times (travel agent perks good.gif ).

I agree 4 is good. We'll make it down there one day, when soccer isn't our life !



QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Oct 5 2007, 05:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 5 2007, 04:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 5 2007, 10:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif


It's Friday All..I'm sooooo happy..lonngggg drawnnn outttt weekkkk !

I am thinking about vacation next yr...I wanna go to Disney just to let my baby experience it...BUT she will still only be 2yrs old...Is that too young for her..would it make sense to take her..or just hop on a plane to JA..mi nah pay fi hotel nuttin..cause I was thinkin going to JA is going to cost too much..but if we limit our stay and visits smile.gif then maybe we can doing

What u'll think


I would think 2 is too young. At that age kids dont understand what they are seeing and most times the costumed characters will scare her to death! I worked at a place where I dressed in those costumes and most kids were freaked out by me and the parents would think it was funny and still try to force them te child on me. I think 4 is a good age to start that stuff, at least then the child has long term memory and will actually remember it in a year.


I've taken my son to Disney so many times, but the 1st time was when he was 2. He doesn't remember really anything about that trip, but barely remembers (details) from 3 yrs ago when we went or gets confused because he's been fortunate enough to go a bunch of times (travel agent perks good.gif ).

I agree 4 is good. We'll make it down there one day, when soccer isn't our life !


Meant to say.....we (taking Craig) ...get there someday.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-05 16:01:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (ChristineJames @ Oct 5 2007, 01:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 4 2007, 03:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (sjb1221 @ Oct 4 2007, 03:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 4 2007, 04:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A little birdy told me this Shawn person might be Dorethas. Any old timers remember her?


no0pb.gif I don't think so...she was one of the most positive people on the orginial threads.



Ah...........but a woman scorned....................



hey JomoGirl....Not sure who your likkle birdy is....but I can tell you 100% it is NOT Dee!!!! Someone on here is stirring the pot.


It amazes me that noone listens to what I say .....
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-05 15:55:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (sjb1221 @ Oct 5 2007, 11:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Yardiewife @ Oct 5 2007, 10:45 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Every morning when he leaves for work I have to ask him "you have your keys, wallet and phone"...he always replies "of course" walks out the door and two seconds later returns for one, two or all three of the items laughing.gif


laughing.gif This is our morning routine. I'm usually standing at the door with one of items.....MEN.


I cannot tell you how many times Damien used the ATM machine then walked away without the card wacko.gif


Anytime routine leaving the house.....have your key, wallet, phone or whatever else we may need on the outing!!!

Just like with my son EVERY morning.....do you have your soccer shoes, shinguards, shirt, shorts, heel pads !!! Did you brush your teeth, put on deodorant, eat breakfast !!! My son has ADD and I'm sooooooooooo sure that Craig does too !!!!

I've lost count the maaaaany times that Craig has packed his lunch, we're in the car or already up the road.......and I ask, do you have your lunch ?? Oh sh*t.... turn around come back !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-05 10:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 5 2007, 10:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jamerican @ Oct 5 2007, 09:35 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It must be a Jamaican MAN thing cause it doesn't even stop when they get here.

wacko.gif AWWWWWW MANNNNN, It continues here in the states?????? Time to start buying cheapo phones as backups!!!



Oh, just you wait. If he is anything like my husband he will lose his phone constantly. Of course, it is always on either silent or vibrate, so you can't just call it to find it. He will forget his wallet too. He'll lose the car keys. And, you will come home to all the lights on, the doors of all your cabinets open, the back door open with the a/c running, the tv on while the radio is blasting, and every single pot and pan you own dirty in the sink cause he cooked you dinner!


Kelly you have me and Craig rollin over here !!! cause it is SOOOOOOOO like him too!!!!! He lost his wallet 2 weeks ago, no clue where he left it. His phone is ALWAYS lost in the house. A couple of months ago, it was lost for about 5 days....had it on silence, then the battery died...it was in between blankets in the bedroom !!! ??

Drives me crazy madness with cabinet doors, drawers open and closet doors open!!!! I have so many bruises from him leaving his flippin drawers of the dresser open and I come around the corner........WHAM !!! I'm like....Crraaaaaaig !!!! How about water running and goes to watch TV ???!!! Radio on and he's NOWHERE to be found !!!

Hangers left on the bed & floor, instead of just taking the shirt OFF of the hanger, he takes the entire hanger and shirt out of the closet and hanger drops to wherever he's heading to.

Charger, how many times he's "misplaced" his cell phone charger !!

He told me 2 days ago, he's starting to get "lazy" because he's leaving shoes everywhere, hangers everywhere, cabinets open etc etc !!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-05 10:24:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (sjb1221 @ Oct 5 2007, 11:05 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Yardiewife @ Oct 5 2007, 10:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Yeah I know they weren't talking about Dee of Dee&Dave...Doretha was a Dee as well if I remember correctly.



Yeah, back then Dee&Dave (brownskin) went by Denise and Doretha was Dee. Some of us stayed in contact with her for awhile...she was a sweetheart.


We are still in touch....and it's definitely not her. She doesn't come on here ....she has no reason to. She caught her man cheating when she went down for the interview and broke up with him.

She's doing great !

QUOTE (jamerican @ Oct 5 2007, 10:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jawi876 @ Oct 5 2007, 07:04 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 5 2007, 09:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (kkholiday2006 @ Oct 5 2007, 09:55 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 5 2007, 09:53 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
ooh i cant wait to get me a limeade box drink!!



JALOVE,

I like the Cherry Limeade Box Drink. You know how they freeze it at the "Shop". So by the time you get home it's melting ...lol. So good.


at the big tastee patty place we dig thru the ice box to get the frozen ones!!! i have not tried the cherry limeade ill be on search mission for that. Im have to top up my digicel fon before i leave so i can text u all lol on my journey!!!! im a mad texter i rather text


I can never get a text to go through from my digicel phone back to the States when I'm there. What am I doing wrong? My sweetie also cannot text me, but he can text his sister with no problem. I have VZW...we have tried everything, and it will say that it was sent on his phone, but I NEVER get it.

It is soooooo frustrating.



I haven't been able to figure this out either. Sometimes I feel it is the phone or maybe it is the service. Not sure but it is frustrating as hell! One time Kevin text me something and it blew up my phone texting the same message 20 + times.... something got stuck I guess. When he called digicel they told him some lame azzz story that there was a repeat feature that HE must have pushed????? I have no clue what they were talking about. Ever since no texts have been able to go through so although he calls them to ask why it doesn't work....they provide no answer.


I'm sure you guys already know this....but for those that may not...

1. If sending from your email address:
in the "to" line of email, enter the following:
876#######@DIGITEXTJM.COM
area code followd by phone number @digitextjm.com
*subject line does not need to be added*

2. If sending from your cell phone
you should be able to text just by adding the phone number
1876#######
if that does not work, then try
876#######@DIGITEXTJM.COM
area code followd by phone number @digitextjm.com
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-05 10:18:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 4 2007, 04:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A little birdy told me this Shawn person might be Dorethas. Any old timers remember her?


It is totally and absolutely NOT her !! but Shawn is a guy !
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-04 17:49:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (kimmykashi @ Oct 4 2007, 12:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
OK missa Shawn or u sure a no Miss Shawn..cause u sure worse dan most a we ooman pon yah wid the back and fort tracing...no body beg u fo read or comment pon any post so please sah...no bodda wid it. Enough already

why r u here..did ur wife/husband lef u,cheated on u and u had no one to talk to ?



QUOTE (shawn99 @ Oct 4 2007, 12:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 4 2007, 10:36 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (shawn99 @ Oct 4 2007, 10:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Long time I haven't post anything. Congrats to all the approvals, weddings, babies etc, you all deserve it. All who didn't make it in the processing have my sympathy as well as those who have get their husbands or wives here only to have them leave or cheat, but life goes on, so move on.

Keep the post on the process involved coming in obtaining greencard for your love ones, but bway some a dem woman chat yu nuh, dem come pon ya an chat dem life story...wha type a frack dem wear, wha dem man luv fi duh, wha dem puss and dog eat, what dem 2 month baby luv fi eat, whey dem a duh a wok, which is nothing from the amount of post some made while working. when dem bruk or when dem have money, when dem a go a jamaica, when dem man call, wha type a weed dem man smoke, dem man ex., dem man madda granny sister uncle etc, etc, etc, etc. Wow keep it to the minimum call your friends and tell them dont make it that public and I bet most of you r husband dont know that you are gossiping your lifestory like that.


My husband does know what we chat about. I tell him all the time.

I do have to say, I am a little tired of people telling me what I can and cannot chat about in public. I'm a grown woman and I can pretty much say whatever I like. If you don't like it, skip over it.


What a way it bun yu, ah wish yu luck, yu betta understand sey jamaican man nuh kip up wid foolishniss all di time. Cuss if unnu want, cause unnu know seh a nuh lie mi a tell. some a unnu chat unnu life story too much. Throw mi corn, mi nuh call nuh fowl or throw stone inna hag pen, di one get di lick bawl




Shawn (a guy) lurked on here a yr 1/2 ago....I believe he was still in Jamaica. Never lead onto where, what, why, etc etc.. surprised to see he's resurfaced. Maybe a foreign relationship gone bad???
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-04 12:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Oct 3 2007, 04:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Oct 2 2007, 10:19 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
yes.gif ...I was about to type the same thing! But, you do have to be really careful about how large you make the whole in the nipple...just like you said JG...Baby could choke! The other thing Rhonda, I wouldn't introduce cornmeal porridge until 7-10 months old. The baby cereal is fine before that, but cornmeal can be hard to digest for a little, little baby.

I'm so nervous. I have a lot to learn wacko.gif


You'll be totally fine. My sister worked for a magazine place when I was pregnant, the best magazine to get....even now is Parents Magazine. They have great great tips and loads of advice. Take tons of parenting classes --together, if you can. Read lots of books. I personally loved the book....What to expect when you are expecting and the next one after that, what to expect the 1st year and the toddler one. Those books helped me with soooo many questions. Fortunately Austin wasn't a "sickly" baby. The only major thing he's had done was his tonsils and adenoids came out right around his 5th bday --he had "kissing tonsils". Other than that...... enjoy good.gif

I fed my son cereal when he was just 2 1/2 months old.....formula just wasn't cuttin it. Per my doc, totally fine, but I spoon fed him, never gave him any in a bottle.

If you have any questions or need mommy advice, do not hesitate to email me. This stuff doesn't come with a book.... ohmy.gif
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-03 12:20:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 3 2007, 09:30 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (BelwinMills @ Oct 2 2007, 05:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (rhondapayter @ Oct 2 2007, 02:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 1 2007, 09:29 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
She right on the mark, Rhonda. My son was almost 10 pounds at birth. I gave him cereal in his bottle at one month to enable him to sleep through the night.

Ok, so now I'm thinking you must make the cereal really thin to be able to put it in the bottle? I'm so overwhelmed huh.gif I know my mom had really big babies - me and my sister both weighed over 10 pounds - and she said she gave us cereal really early on too. I'm gonna need a book on how to do this stuff tongue.gif

Feeding baby cereal? I saw my girlfriend do that so her baby would sleep. I won't be doing that because I don't believe in feeding food to early to my baby. Her baby was only 7 pounds at birth.



Yah, well, if you had a 10 pound baby who woke up every 2 hours and acted like he was starving to death, you might change your mind. Funny thing is, he's now 15 and he still eats just about every two hours!!!!!!



My son was only 8 lbs 5 oz almost 22 inc long.....but he was always tall and thin. Meaning 95% of height and 25% of weight in the "percentage" scale thing that doctors go by. Depending on your doctor and baby....my doctor said, when Austin is hungry....feed him, doesn't matter what time it is and then when he was able to drink regular milk, give him TONS of vitamin D milk. I didn't breast feed, had absolutely no desire to!! He was "under" weight (per the norm) till he was about 10, then hormones kicked in and puberty started...and out came the weight....but never ever had a problem eating everything and anything. He still eats like a horse...almost 14 and solid rock but he's extreeeemely active boy started that from within !!

Girls....are waaaaay high maintenance !!! Boys...in my opinion, soooooo much easier !!! Shoot especially nowadays....high school, ugh !! I told my parents (at my sons soccer game yesterday), my brother and sis-in-law have no CLUE what they are "in for". They have twin girls that are 6. The girls now.........whoooooa !!!!! Just keep a tight leash (not really that tight), but be VERY VEEERY involved parent) with your boys....gotta be !!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-03 12:10:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 1 2007, 09:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (BelwinMills @ Sep 29 2007, 06:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Question- My hubby is missing cornmeal porridge. Does anyone know how to make it or have a reciepe? Thanks whistling.gif



How come he doesn't know how to make this? Andre makes it for me all the time.


Craig's made it a couple of times....yuck. I had found a recipe and he said, oh ...that's different than mine. I had to laugh, cause he was missing half the ingredients !
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-01 09:45:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Sep 30 2007, 02:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hello happy sunday everyone....um....is this bank reference letter needed! or can i use my statements printed from the web for the past year!! bank giving me drama they seem to have no clue about this reference letter, its bank of america i emailed them and they claim they processed it but i call to follow up and i havent received it so here i go calling and they keep transferring me from one dept to the next


Just go into your local BofA office and have one of the managers write up something ...like when you opened your account, how much of a balance, that you are an excellent customer with good standing ....etc etc.... I was in and out of my BofA in 10 minutes. Manager was happy to do up a letter for me without any cost.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-30 17:41:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Sep 29 2007, 01:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Sep 29 2007, 12:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Sep 28 2007, 04:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hey, guys. Please could we move on to something else? Everyone is pretty much stuck in their own opinions, with their own reasons, and it is what it is. It's all incredibly stressful and sad today.

I agree to disagree or agree with you, whatever the case may be.

Have a good weekend everyone. I'm out.

QUOTE (jamerican @ Sep 28 2007, 03:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Marlita @ Sep 28 2007, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (luvtravlin @ Sep 28 2007, 07:59 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Minfay @ Sep 28 2007, 07:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Deyoungting @ Sep 28 2007, 06:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You are no longer worth the effort or my VALUABLE time to sit down and respond to your obilivious statements.

You've GOT to be kidding me!!!!

This forum was started for US to have a place to help each other -- not BASH each other every chance we get.

What is wrong with someone having an opinion? That's just fine if you don't agree with it but do we have to get so nasty?

I have been around (and been a party to) plenty of prejudice in my life. It is what it is. Yeah, it's a shame that in this day and age things like this still go on -- I am sorry for that. I really am. But I don't go around making it worse. Whatever......


Ya know Mindy.....I TOTALLY miss the good ole days when we used to laugh, joke, support, be caring, etc etc and not have ANY of this BS drama on here !!!!! Where the heck are all of our "veterans"????!!!


Oh LORD!!! Get over the veterans already!!!! It sounds quite insulting to those who are "newbies" on here! Like they are unwanted or something. I have seen you make this comment many times before, even when I was a newbie and all it made me do is not like the veterans. so that comment really gets the thread no where. Its gonna become a battle of the newbie verse the vet in a minute and of course the newbie will win, cause there are WAY more of them. The thread is what it is! It evolves just like everyting else in life! It has its ups and downs.

The problem on here is what I see on many other forums that have to do with Jamaica and the Americans who love it. People have a high-octane opinion, mixed with their love for a country but really have never walked a mile in the shoes of the people from the country. I think people who are not Black don't understand when things SEEM to always have a "racial" issue behind them because they only see the surface. They only see what the media presents to them.

I gotta say, there's a WHOLE underground, unspoken world that Black people from ALL OVER THE WORLD share. Only WE share it so other races and cultures don't get it. Blacks meet from the US, UK, Africa, Caribbean, and they all have someting in common. The way they have been treated throughout the history of this world. They all have heard horrible tear causing stories from their granparents, and even their own children. The all know whats its like to be a ethnic minority, even when they live in a country or continent where they are the majority. When we don't live in areas where there are many of us we gravitate to one another, giving each other an unspoken look, or head nod just to show, we acknowledge each others Blackness. When we are around each other we embrace our Blackness and our culture much more than we do when we are around others. WE wear our hair differently, we dress differently, we talk about differnet things. We have converstaions and speech patterns we would never share with other races no matter how down we think they are. When we do it fuels debates like the one on here cause others just don't understand.

I know this may be new for many to understand, even if you've been around Black people for years, dated Black men, had Black friends, listen to reggae, rap, soul and R&B. There are just somethings that you will never get. Either you can't physically experience them, like having someone call you a N----, have people tell you to cover your nappy hair, spit at you cause your Black, through hateful slurs at you, say your pretty for a Black girl, ask if you wash your hair, sit in an office of all whites, sit in a school of all whites, sit on a bus, at a movie, in the mall......its a different world from our eyes. Then there's just the stuff we as Black folks talk about in the privacy of or Black neighborhoods, some of that stuff will never come out to the public til the day we all die!!!!

SO when issues like JENA 6 come out well you're just getting a bit of a taste of what we talk about and how we talk on the DL.



HELLO!!!!!

Girl you hit the nail on the head! Thank you for your eloquent, well written, enlightful post. Oh but maybe my ideas or throughts aren't worthy because I am a "NEWBIE"!!!!! #######???? I think it is quite the opposite because you see we all have more experience .................(let it go......)

Thanks again....



I think the veterans comments were made as far as the spirit of the way previous discussions have occured and not necessarily what was said.


But....once AGAIN, everything was taken completely out of context !!! No wonder folks are droppin like flies....


Well it can be taken several ways what was said in respect to the vetaran comment so we when posting should try to understand that when you type words they can be taken different ways as opposed to actually speaking. I read that statement abt the veterans several times and in all honestly it can be viewed negatively or positively. Words on paper or screen are very different than spoken word. Everyone comprehends differently, information presented to them. I was always taught to think before i speak as some things can come off wrong and once said they cant be taken back. Lets all try to stay positive here and focus on what we are all here for smile.gif to support each other through our journey all this added fighting amongst us makes it a bit more stressful. This is a place i normally come to get my mind off things and for you guys support. Lets get back to that:) im sure everyone has voiced what they have to say on the topics of the past few days, week(s).


But of course, it's ALWAYS taken to a negative level !!!!!! If anyone has ever read part 1 & 2 of the yardie thread ...you would see that 99% of the times everything was positive.

I just asked my sons 2 friends that are over right now ...one black and one black/japenese about this entire scenario.............and neither one of them expressed every having ANY type of prejudiceness towards them. IT IS HOW WE RAISE OUR CHILDREN. STOP EXPRESSING TO YOUR CHILDREN about all of the negativeness you have endured in your life, because then they turn around and take that into the "outside world". I've been through ALOT but I don't have to tell my son everything that I've gone through and trust me, I've dealt with a ton of prejudiceness as well. Have our children of TODAY, make a POSITIVE CHANGE for the world and change the BS racism that still exists (from years gone by) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know my son is doing that because of the way "I" am raising NOT to see color and to NOT be ignorant to anyone that is of a different race.

On Dr Phil yesterday his FIRST WORDS were .......................WHERE ARE THE PARENTS OF ALL OF THESE CHILDREN, both sides !!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-09-29 12:51:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (lillywight @ Oct 25 2007, 11:20 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (waynegeraldine @ Oct 25 2007, 11:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 25 2007, 09:59 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (JALOVE @ Oct 25 2007, 12:38 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (jamerican @ Oct 25 2007, 01:25 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (classychic77 @ Oct 24 2007, 09:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
DID U REALLY HAVE TO POST THIS IT IS OUT OF ORDER! OUT OF CONTROL! COULD YOU NOT HAVE LEFT THAT TO A PERSONAL MESSAGE WITH NICKY WE ALL DO NOT NEED TO SEE YOUR BUSINESS THIS IS HURTFUL AND I BELIEVE UR PURPOSLEY TRYIN TO RUB THIS IN AND WHY ARE U EVEN TELLING WHERE NICKY LIVES YOUR A MAD OOMAN

Wow!!!! Jalove I completely agree with you. Nicky I am so sorry you are going through this, you are in my prayers!!! I know I'm new to this but we are all here for you.



Remember ... sometimes when in pain...we do things that don't make sense. I know I have in pain sent out crazy letters to friends and family members telling all my sh** because I wanted to hurt HIM but ultimatly it just made me look foolish. Just remember all both women (if not more) are in pain and probably are just looking for support.


im wondering why lily would join VJ today just to air this business and tell nicky business is what upset me why today? why not give nicky a chance to have aired her business on a site that she frequents daily or keep the most personal details in a PM noone need know where nicky live or that his son is coming then to say give nicky love and support? did nicky vent her issue on here to ask for love and support she didnt post abt this or was even given the opportunity hence her statement of He's telling her that we were just friends, LOL. I have photos, text messages, etc. I've shared it all with Nicky -- but she's in a quandary as to what she should i just feel it a little bit much



OK...time for me to step in on this issue.

I told Lilly and Nicky what I figured out yesterday. And, yes, Marlita, it was because of you posting her pictures that I figured it out. I know Lilly from a couple of other sites and she had posted many pictures of Corey, in the exact same shirt he was wearing in one of those pictures yesterday. I did some research on some previous postings here and there and then I went to the ladies via PM's and told them what I thought. I sent each to the respective websites to verify for themselves. Turns out, I was right. They ended up wanting to talk to one another and after asking permission from both, I gave each the other's information. From there, they are working this triangle out.

Nicky is in denial. She's invested much time, energy, emotions, and money into this relationship and she doesn't see a clear cut answer on what to do. Lilly dumped Corey immediately. I believe Lilly's post was a way of working through her feelings. She loved this guy. If you would read some of her posts, she really loved him. And, he talked words of love and of building a future right back at her. They even discussed LIlly filing a visa for him. She asked me where to start a few months ago. To add insult to injury, Nicky and he were already engaged when Lilly met Corey. She was duped from the very beginning. Anyhow, I believe her posts are her way of trying to get over Corey and this situation. And, a way to show Nicky that he did this to her too......he carried on while Nicky filed for a visa for him and talked about their wedding and their lives together. She really wants Nicky to think about what she is still contemplating. Believe it or not, Lilly took an automatic liking to Nicky and her maternal instincts kicked in. She doesn't want to see her hurt again now or in the future.

Sometimes you have to do bold things to get the point across. That's all that was. Lilly cares enough to want to shock her into really thinking about it. And talking on the phone to her did not seem to be getting this point across.

One last thought for you, Nicky, if you are reading this......if there were two of you and all his family and friends were involved.........how many more could there be out there? Think about it.

Nicky......tune out the thoughts of money and pride and really, REALLY think about this. Please.


That is excatly the kind of person Shawn was telling everyone about last week, I don't know the man and don't want to be too harsh, but I'm wondering right now what his girlfriend in Jamaica would think about all of this. He seem to really like talking about the future to together with ladies he meets, he should have been married by now if he is that much the marrying type, there are women in Jamaica you know, but the thing about jamaican women is that they really don't marry bums.

The only thing this man loves are his sneakers and Jeans, and you can toss in a gold chain here and there. I see visa all over this one. Kick him to the curb Nicky, you can do better, but that is only my opinion.


I've shared my concerns with Nicky about my hunch that there are local women he is involved with -- and I gave her specific reasons why I thought what I thought. She can choose to ignore them if she wants, but the signs are there. The hair had been up on the back of my neck since my visit in August and I was desperately seeking the truth. I can handle anything as long as it's the truth. And, handle this . . . I will. I'm writing a letter to the Embassy with PROOF of my relationship with this man. Although it may not fall into the right hands in time for their interview, I pray that God will see fit to keep this bum in his own country . . . and that he stops preying on American women in search of a Visa. Believe me, Corey's very sweet, soft-spoken, and suave . . . almost innocent and naive acting. He could win over a charlatan with his childish good-looks and romantic swooning.

Silly me. I fell too -- and I'm a grown woman. But, knowing what I know now about him, I can walk away without hesitancy.


I've agree with everything up to this particular point. "I" personally don't think that it would be your responsibility to contact the Embassy to file a complaint, unless Nicky wanted you to or you were both filing. I think that part is completely and totally up to Nicky who is in the process and their interview is shortly approaching.
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-25 10:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (lillywight @ Oct 25 2007, 10:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm not sure what else to say.

I posted what I posted because there's strength in numbers . . . and I feel that women should have each other's backs.

Nicky can decide to believe Corey and marry him. Or, she can open her eyes wide and SEE what kind of a man she's in love with.

I'm glad I found out now. It hasn't been easy and I've spent hour and hours crying . . . and I haven't slept all night . . . but I will be okay in time.

I just want Nicky to be okay -- and not marry a man who's a two-timing (or more) no-good, lying cheat! If she does marry him, a week, a month, a year, ten years later . . . she will be dealing with this same situation all over again.


ABSO-FREAKIN-LUTELY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHY be mad at Lilly ??? Just do not get that at all. BOTH of these women were duped by this guy ??? Wouldn't you want to post something and help others that may be in the same situation.....shoot "I" would !!!

My heart goes out to both of you. We ALL know how much time, money, patience, etc etc goes into these relationships. I hope TO GOD that Nicky sees this with her HEAD **not** her HEART !!!! cause heart always wins.

Thanks for sharing, that's all I gotta say, thanks for sharing ---you are helping others more than you know !!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-25 09:19:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (lillywight @ Oct 24 2007, 11:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hey all ... new to the Board . . . was brought here on an expected "journey" today . . .

Learned that my boyfriend is also Nicky "Salmon's" current fiance'. She last saw him in March. I met him in April and have been back to see him 3 times. He and I have been planning our future together . . . and I'm thankful that I was smart enough to make him wait a year before I filed for a Visa, or I'd be in the same position Nicky is.

I've struggled all day . . . have talked to Nicky several times. He's telling her that we were just friends, LOL. I have photos, text messages, etc. I've shared it all with Nicky -- but she's in a quandary as to what she should do . . .

Give her love and support, folks. Her financial investment over this lying and cheating man is only gonna increase when she brings him and his son over here to Florida and she has to support them for a long time. I say cut your losses now, Girl!

Here's a picture of Corey and I taken in August when I was last there to see him and his family (yes -- they ALL know about me).




I absolutely and agree with you 1000% !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As she stated the 2 of them have spoken before this post. This a forum where you can speak about anything. This happens MORE than anyone really really knows and gets posted ....and not just with Jamaican/American relationships. I commend you for coming out and sharing this with all of us and your post was written nicely.

If "my man" was cheating, I would contact the other woman as well. This is NOT RIGHT for both of you!!!!

I was in the same boat as well, but "I" didn't find out until after he got here!!! I spoke to the other woman (several times)and SHE was absolutely clueless as to why he was here and we both shed some light on both of our "relationships" and spoke to each other in a mature adult manner. She had met him after me too AND had only seen him 2x (and been to Jamaica only 2x)!!!! As anyone knows me, this has ruined our relationship !!!

These guys......(and some women) trying to have 2 relationships at once.....just plain ole stupidity AND it's alllll about karma. This would have come out later on down the line and I'm glad it came out now BEFORE he WERE to come here!!!

"I" am here for both of these ladies!!! We are not here to "bash" either one of the them, that's just absolutely ridiculous and completely immature thing to do. We ALL should be here for BOTH of you because this is a very difficult time!!! It's not THEIR fault that they are BOTH in this situation and being taken advantage of, it's about KARMA for the goofball !!!!!!!
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-25 06:46:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)
QUOTE (Marlita @ Oct 24 2007, 03:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
offtopic45vn.gif

My hubby's bday is Sunday and I will be in JA with him. I am wanting to do something fun that day or at least go eat somewhere where he can get a surprise cake brought out to him and a happy bday song. Can anyone suggest a place in either Negril or Mobay.

Also if you have any other suggestions on a good bday excursion or idea for that day let me know.

Thanks wub.gif


There are so many places in Negril. Sweet & Spice, great food, good prices. There's a great little romantic place right on the beach called Mom's Place, very inexpensive. Kuyaba is nice, but expensive. Rock House is always really nice, but expensive. Great food at Norma's...yet expensive....went there for my birthday and my best friend surprised me when I got back from the bathroom, she had "hired" 3 guys from the beach to sing happy birthday. Roots has GREAT food and jazz night is on Sunday's.

How about the Wild Thing has a GREAT excursion to Rhode's Hall Plantation..includes snorkeling, horseback riding if you wanted to and a great lunch. There's also the zipline tour through Chukka Adventures. I love the Black River Safari with the YS Falls. I've been all over that area.....gosh and have done so many different things.

Hope that helps.

Kelly
luvtravlinFemaleJamaica2007-10-24 20:26:00