ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
PhilippinesDid I do wrong?
Are you mainly concerned with what others think about your age difference?

You might find this topic helpful: How to Deal with your Marriage Critics Effectively
Laser1MalePhilippines2010-08-28 10:11:00
PhilippinesFiancee may have a different purpose! - Pls. advise
From your first post, the current conflict originates from her deciding to keep her last name. The events that followed simply look like a blown-up misunderstanding to me. It does appear that she lied in her application that she would stay with him, so I think he needs to fully understand why before proceeding.
Laser1MalePhilippines2010-08-14 01:44:00
Philippinessending packages to the philippines
For USPS, I only use Express Mail International. My online research indicated that Express Mail is more secure than Priority Mail. I sent a used Blackberry phone once through Express Mail International, without any problems.

Edited by Laser Lou, 27 November 2010 - 10:42 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2010-11-27 22:41:00
PhilippinesMarried Filipinos who send money to family back in Philippines

How can I say "no" when its her paycheck. I'm pretty much dependent on her now that i quit my job. I am in a really crappy situation.


It's not really crappy, because you are doing what you desired. You will either have to adjust to this for a while, or get another job.
Laser1MalePhilippines2010-12-04 10:35:00
Philippinesphone cards
Google Voice charges $0.17 to Philippines cell phones, and $0.11 to Philippines land lines. Also, it provides online records of calls, and the call quality is good. See www.google.com/voice
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-01-02 11:25:00
Philippineshey guys!!
That's great! Good luck to you and your fiancée.
Laser1MalePhilippines2010-11-28 20:10:00
PhilippinesWife wants to leave and go back home

If i divorce her here she wil be out of status i think and i don't want a forced deporatation.Just get the divorce and she catch her flight back home.


Simple..just fly her back the day you two sign the final divorce decree.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-02-04 20:53:00
PhilippinesSending money to your wife's family for hospital expenses

While some people in here have offered some good advice, what many are forgetting is that I love my wife. After reading many of the responses, I get the impression that many of you view bringing a wife over from the Philippines is more a business arrangement than an act of love between the man & woman. If I didn't love my wife and simply viewed it as a business arrangement, I would have had her sent back to the Philippines well over a year ago.

Do many of the women in here view it as business arrangement or an act of love?

How about the men? Do they view it as a business arrangement or an act of love?


One of the purposes of the marriage immigration processes is to stop such business arrangements.

Edited by Laser1, 24 March 2011 - 11:24 AM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-03-24 11:23:00
PhilippinesSending money to your wife's family for hospital expenses

Furthermore, why should she get more discretionary money than me? While she said she'd still contribute to some bills (just groceries) during those 3-4 months, I have some reservations, as her desire for 60-70% of her paycheck as discretionary money is too much.



Surely you can negotiate that down to equal discretionary spending.
It sounds like she is starting to negotiate in terms of dollars. Just come back to her with the figures you have in mind. Hopefully you two can come to an agreement somewhere in the middle.


Laser1MalePhilippines2010-11-16 16:30:00
PhilippinesSending money to your wife's family for hospital expenses
An interesting discussion on that topic appeared today in the "Live In the Philippines" blog: http://liveinthephil...t-would-you-do/
Laser1MalePhilippines2010-10-27 19:18:00
Philippinesam I cheap?

She quoted me $1,300(dollars) for a reckless and earrings. (white diamond).


Could that be a Freudian slip? Posted Image




Laser1MalePhilippines2011-05-02 17:02:00
Philippinesam I cheap?

But she gets moody or calls me cheap if I don't do as she says.




But she did tell me, do not worry, we are spending now a lot because of the visa and the fact that she needs to travel for her visa and her visa kid. Once she is here she said, things will be different and we will spend less.


Let her get moody, or call you cheap; as long as you hold your money, things will be ok. You must, must, must hold your ground for that behavior to stop.

Also, expect spending to increase once she is here, simply because prices are higher.


Laser1MalePhilippines2011-05-01 12:44:00
Philippinesam I cheap?
You are dealing with a "Moral Hazard" situation. It is the same kind of thing that led to the financial collapse in 2008. She can ask and spend as much as possible with no consequences to her, while you bear all of the risk. One way or another, you have to allow her to feel the consequences of overspending, perhaps by limiting how much you send, or by postponing things.

You can read more about moral hazard here: Moral Hazard
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-05-01 12:06:00
Philippinescourt-less relationship
Courtship and homesickness are two separate issues. If you try to combine them, you'll get either "courtsickness" or "homeship".

Edit: or maybe "homecourtshipsickness".

Edited by Laser1, 22 May 2011 - 08:26 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-05-22 20:21:00
PhilippinesFilipina wife issues....advice please...
Your wife's family seems to be the source of that stress. Maybe the best thing you can do is to advise your wife to resist contacting her family much, until they adjust and stop pressuring her for money.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-01-18 13:00:00
PhilippinesBringing 2 China Made Tablets to U.S. is this ok?
If it is a knock-off, you may be allowed to bring one item. "
"However, travelers arriving in the United States may be permitted an exemption and allowed to import one article of each type, which must accompany the person, bearing a counterfeit, confusingly similar or restricted gray market trademark, provided that the article is for personal use and is not for sale."
From here.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-05-27 09:25:00
Philippinescrazy question... and still no answers
The one-finger sign already means something, so they have no choice but to use two fingers to signal what they want, depending on the context.

Edited by Laser1, 30 June 2011 - 07:08 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-06-30 19:07:00
PhilippinesCold feet

I am so jealous to lose my freedom. I don't why.

...

Where will my freedom goes?



How about a little video game to shed light on that issue?
Passage by Jason Rohrer

The Creator's Statement. Read that first.

A video, if you would rather just watch..


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3o0HFXPfco

Edited by Laser1, 13 June 2011 - 12:34 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-06-13 12:34:00
PhilippinesBest Way to send $2
Send a cell-phone load through Aryty.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-07-05 18:36:00
PhilippinesBringing fake items in US

According to the U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP), you are actually allowed to bring in one item, if it is for personal use.
"However, travelers arriving in the United States may be permitted an exemption and allowed to import one article of each type, which must accompany the person, bearing a counterfeit, confusingly similar or restricted gray market trademark, provided that the article is for personal use and is not for sale."
From here.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-06-30 10:55:00
PhilippinesWe're together finally and officially Mrs. Brady...
Congratulations!!!
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-07-16 09:38:00
PhilippinesWhat did I do wrong?
It sounds like she is having a full-on raging fit. There is little you can do about it now. It will dissipate. You can expect that to happen again on occasion. She probably needs medication to control that. Do not argue with her. It is usually impossible to deal with the actual issue until the fit ends. The best thing you can do is keep some distance from her; leave your house or lock yourself in another room, until she returns to normal.

Edited by Laser1, 25 July 2011 - 08:42 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-07-25 20:38:00
PhilippinesAffordable Shipping Manila to USA
The Large USPS Priority Mail International box holds 20lb, and costs $56 to ship. So shipping 50lb would cost $168. That is the least expensive option, apart from sending a balikbayan box by sea.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-08-30 08:57:00
PhilippinesClothes Advice for My Filipina Wife
To get a better sense of fashion, I suggest looking at what real women around you wear in daily life, not random pics you find on the Internet. For Pete's sake, don't ogle the women; just focus on the clothes. Facebook is a good source, though, because your fb friends are probably your peers, so you can get an idea of what makes sense.

Edited by Laser1, 18 August 2011 - 11:12 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-08-18 23:09:00
PhilippinesONLINE western union
I have used it before. It is safe. They are diligent in security. They will occasionally call you to verify who you are.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-10-06 05:17:00
Philippineshelp with mama

MIL went to buy paint for the house. right after that, there was flooding in the vilalge including their home. There was nothing I could do. I was still recovering here from the trip. I jsut had to look at Gretchen and say I wished she had paid attention to the weather.


That is really your MIL and FIL's issue, not your's. The flooding would have happened anyway, even if you had never met them. You did not help or hurt them, so it is just water under the bridge. The house paint should be treated as a nice gift from you that they can see every day and enjoy.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-10-06 20:32:00
Philippineshelp with mama

Again, she's 19. She doesn't know what she wants, ...


With due respect, I think that there are other factors more significant here than age: Education, wealth/income, family environment, and personality are some. The main concern is that Gretchen has freedom to grow and make decisions. That would still be important if she was 40.

Edited by Laser1, 03 October 2011 - 09:05 AM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-10-03 09:04:00
Philippineshelp with mama

the first week was fine. the second week, in the village. The budget went nuts. It should have been less for just the two of us. But it absolutely went crazy. The harder I tried to keep on budget the worse it got. I spent nearly 60,000 php or better the second week compared with 35,000php the first week and I did not know the 6,000php was gone until Saturday, the 17th. Talk about being shocked. ... But I feel so much like a schmuck over all the money sent.


This is totally normal. You spent more money on a vacation than you budgeted for, enough to hurt your budget at home. Just the hotel costs for a week's vacation to a western city can easily run 60tw php ($1500).

Edited by Laser1, 20 September 2011 - 02:23 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-09-20 14:22:00
Philippineshelp with mama
The village drama is something that you can expect. It is hard to see how you getting involved can improve that. I would just nod my head and leave it alone.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-09-20 08:56:00
Philippineswant to meet new friend

If you don't agree with that ideal then maybe you should just stay out of OUR sub-forum...


tama! hehe
(English: true dat!)


Laser1MalePhilippines2011-10-24 20:48:00
PhilippinesGot my 1st Job here in US
Congrats!
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-11-15 12:59:00
PhilippinesZamboanga City - Have you travelled there ?

I have travelled a lot around the Philippines, the only time that I really felt afraid was when I was in Calbayog City... In Davao I see Army people with big arms, but It is unusual for police to carry big arms... but in Calbayog... their police people is armed and ready... makes me paranoid that there will be a gunfight all of a sudden...


The mayor of Calbayog was shot and killed last May. Maybe that was the reason ...
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-11-28 16:21:00
PhilippinesWaiting..... Waiting

Something i am writing is: "Sis, you know I tried to make my first marriage work. However, when my oldest son came to me and said you and mom argue all the time. this is an agrument house. then my ex asked to leave. I had to weigh if we were setting a good example for the kids for their futures. It was hard to accept facts as they came. it was even harder in talking to multiple pastors and hearing the same thing, to accept the divorce. In courting Gretchen, and bringing Gretchen to America, yes, I did not tell the family. I was trying to be conscious of Grant and Jared. Show Grant and Jared a loving caring Christian home. i want to set a good role model of a family to my sons. Gretchen also wants this as well. Gretchen encourages us to go to church and get involved. did you know the Bible word for "helpmate" actually translates to "ally" and "shield". Helpmate refers to God as much as it refers to God presenting Eve as a helpmate to Adam. Watch the video of the wedding. I found many things me and Gretchen had talked about referenced in the wedding without the pastor knowing those references. the marriage is a union of being the ally and shield to the other. Although there may be a huge age difference. I have yet to find the maturity Gretchen possesses in women twice her age. Gretchen is a true helpmate to me. I only hope you give her a chance to get to know her as I do.' then I go into other things about her arguments and the truth regarding the arguments.


I think its best to not write a letter back. Even if your letter is gracious, if you write back, she will likely write back, starting a crazy back-and-forth exchange.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-12-28 19:56:00
PhilippinesWaiting..... Waiting
It is best to let this cool down. You already have some family support; that is good enough. If you respond to your sister, it might cause others to choose her side. If you let it go, she might eventually come around, in her own time.
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-12-23 16:05:00
PhilippinesWaiting..... Waiting
Pushing your sister to acceptance may not work well. Involving your other family members in activities may work better. Generally family members act like sheep... they respond to be led by others, not pushed.

Edited by Laser1, 23 December 2011 - 08:35 AM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2011-12-23 08:33:00
PhilippinesFraud wife being removed from US
I see no question that the two divorces will be honored, and that your marriage will be validated. About your divorce, if you are concerned about you assets, why not wait until after she is deported to file for divorce? It seems like it would be much harder for her to go after your assets then, and she may accept a quicker settlement. You can probably keep them all if you manage to get a divorce in absentia.

Edited by Laser1, 25 January 2012 - 10:48 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2012-01-25 22:44:00
PhilippinesThings you found strange about the Philippines
Tuba
Laser1MalePhilippines2011-07-23 20:05:00
PhilippinesFilipina Fiancee Freaking Out
This has all of the signs of rushing into marriage. It sounds like you two need more time to get to know each other better.
Laser1MalePhilippines2012-02-06 11:19:00
PhilippinesNever Given up before, but its becoming an option

If he were to start hiding it, it would probably be bad if she found out, though.


It would probably be ok, because it sounds like she is reasonable when his ex-wife is not right there, in her face.
Laser1MalePhilippines2012-04-23 15:08:00
PhilippinesNever Given up before, but its becoming an option

:thumbs:
Whoever is saying 'speak to ex at work' needs :bonk:

For any woman, there is no speaking out of ear shot to an ex, that just intensifies suspicion. What the OP needs to do is talk where his wife can pick up pieces of the convo (no going in another room) & if their is nothing going on, after a while she'll start not caring about those calls. What may be good is communicating only between certain hours (unless there is an emergency) and keep conversations as short as possible.


That is what says he has been doing - speaking shortly and openly with his ex. It has not been working for him; he is now stuck in a conflict with his wife and ex over his children, so he has to do something different.

Edited by Laser1, 23 April 2012 - 02:49 PM.

Laser1MalePhilippines2012-04-23 14:40:00