ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Middle East and North Africamena men and smoking
QUOTE (chemaatah @ Dec 6 2008, 01:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (humpkinpumpkin @ Dec 6 2008, 11:47 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (Karamella @ Dec 6 2008, 02:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The reason smoking is haram (as I understand it) is that using drugs is forbidden and smoking is only a delivery method for ingesting nicotine and nicotine is a highly addictive drug. Nicotine doesn't have to be named on a list of forbidden drugs in the Quran for us to know that we can't use it. It alters brain chemistry and is as addictive as heroin.



So I assume you don't ingest any caffeine as well? I have to say I'm a little shocked. I can't even fathom telling my husband that our love is done if he smokes another cigarette. Obviously it's your choice to do that but I just can't wrap my head around that one. My husband is my other half, my life, my love.

the logic she uses to arrive at why smoking could be haram is totally faulty, but are you seriously trying to compare caffeine to nicotine?


I think she means that if nicotine is addictive than so is caffeine making them both haram. Obviously smoking is much worse for your health.

QUOTE (morocco4ever @ Dec 6 2008, 01:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I can certainly understand that a person has the right to expect certain conditions before marriage, but it would have been best to either wait until after he quit before you got married, or more preferably found someone who already didn't smoke. You have now put yourself into a situation with a man that you don't love, with a habit you find intolerable. This is not going to be easy on either of you at this point. I wish you luck, marriage is not easy as it is without starting it with issues.



good.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-06 14:43:00
Middle East and North Africamena men and smoking
QUOTE (humpkinpumpkin @ Dec 5 2008, 08:10 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It definitely calms me down and chills me right out BUT I just wish it wasn't so bad for you. There's got to be a substitute. I have smoked off and on since I was 16 starting in the girl's bathroom in high school. The last time I quit was in 2002 so it's been a good 6 years for me without even one cigarette. I think that's the longest stretch I've had so far. The other time was when I was married to my ex. I picked up smoking the day he told me he was leaving. I used to take wellbutrin and that totally made me stop because it made the cigarettes taste yucky but I've been off of that for a while now.

Smoking is bad but it's just funny to me how that's the ONLY thing he's really all double-standardish about, you know? Everything else he's very openminded about so it struck me as unusual.



You do way better than me. I think I managed to quit once for six months, but that was like 10 years ago. I'm so addicted, but I didn't smoke around my in-laws for the few days I was there. In fact I didn't smoke at all and I had the worst withdraws. As soon as I was at the Amman airport and behind security I bought the cheap cigerettes from duty free and began to smoke again. It is horrible and I agree the smell is not pleasant. I just enjoy it too much.

No idea why your husband feels that way with only smoking. Men are strange creatures whistling.gif Just look at Charles!
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-05 09:17:00
Middle East and North Africamena men and smoking
QUOTE (chaishai @ Dec 5 2008, 05:42 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think this thread is funny because everyone wants to tell her to fight for her rights and equality etc but noone wants to tell her to smoke!



I'm a smoker so I never tell anyone to quit. I know how much it can calm you down and relax you. I like smoking so for me the only reason I would actually quit is for my future children. Otherwise, I donate to cancer research each year to invest in good cures and treatments. I am sure many people do something on here that isn't good for them and could one day kill them or get them really sick, but we each have to make those choices.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-05 09:02:00
Middle East and North Africamena men and smoking
My husband doesn't like me smoking either. He keeps asking me to quit (though he chain smokes). I have cut back and hope to quit once he is here and settled in. My problem is I enjoy it so much that its hard. Both my parents smoked too. My mother smoked during her pregnancy with me and my brother. We were both born on time and weighed 7 and 8 pounds. I always wonder about those statistics as I meet more mothers who did everything right and had problems than the smoking mothers. Regardless, I think it is still better to quit for pregnancy. I was told I cried all the time after I was born for weeks and I suspect it could have been nicotine withrdraws though I'm not sure how you prove that. Probably why I started smoking so young and have such a difficult time with quiting. I don't want that for my children. For now, I don't allow smoking in the house and I'm down to half as many cigerettes a day as I used to smoke for years. At least I'm seeing progress.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-05 00:04:00
Middle East and North AfricaMonday came too fast
I hope all of you have a great Monday and rest of the week. After tommorow I'm not sure how much I'll be online since I'll be spending time with the hubby but I'll try to check back and let you guys know how things are doing.

Good luck to those of you with interviews coming up. You will be in my prayers. For the muslims out there, Eid Mubarak. May this next year be a good one for you.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-08 09:04:00
Middle East and North AfricaMENA FAMILY!!! The interview seems so far
Rajaa, I am so excited for you. The interview is so close and inshallah it will go great. As everyone has already said, your case looks good with your hubby already living in the west so that should reflect well on him. I can't wait to hear good news from your side. That will make Wednesday perfect for me smile.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-08 19:40:00
Middle East and North AfricaMENA FAMILY!!! The interview seems so far
Hang in there, hopefully these three days will pass quickly and he'll have his visa in hand soon!
S and SFemaleIraq2008-12-06 14:45:00
Middle East and North Africacasablanca 2nd interview very bad!
I'm so sorry this happened to your husband. I don't understand why they think they must insult them at these interviews and be so rude. I hope you get things worked out and all goes well. rose.gif rose.gif rose.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-08 22:48:00
Middle East and North AfricaI've got news!!!
Congratulations!!!!! That is wonderful news. I hope you have a nice and easy pregnancy.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-08 07:49:00
Middle East and North AfricaGot our NOA-1
Congratulations on getting your journey started. I wish I had come to VJ earlier in my process as this site has such great support. We will all be here as you go through the trials of the immigration process. Hopefully yours will go quickly and smoothly.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-10 17:33:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday in MENA
QUOTE (Donna A @ Oct 12 2008, 02:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (bridget @ Oct 12 2008, 02:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Did anyone see that older ignorant woman at the townhall meeting where John McCain was when people were talking about how scared they are of Barak Obama? The woman said, "well he's ARAB!!!"

I think I'll take my husband to her house on Halloween. He won't need a costume he'll just smile and say BOO!! laughing.gif

Jess I see you. Don't you have gallstones too? How are you holding up?


do u ever think these people are paid to go there and say these things just to plant seeds in peoples minds? i dont trust mccain at all.



Unfortunately, I think there are really people that ignorant.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-12 14:34:00
Middle East and North AfricaMonday, already?
Hello MENA! I hope everyone has been having a good Monday. I was off work today so it was nice to sleep in. Back to work tommorow though sad.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-13 17:04:00
Middle East and North Africaletters of love from family!!!
Glad to hear you have some progress even if it is warm letters to help you in your cause. I wish you the best of luck rose.gif rose.gif rose.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-12 23:15:00
Middle East and North AfricaFinally some pic of Nahla!!!!
ma'sha Allah, she is so cute! Congratulations on her birth.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-08 23:10:00
Middle East and North Africacan we go to the UK?
The UK has its own string of rules and regulation in order for you to live and work there. I'm not very familiar with how it works, but I do know you need a sponsor. It sounds like you might have one so maybe........

I wish you good luck and hope that you are with your husband soon.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-13 23:31:00
Middle East and North AfricaTuesday's Thread!
Good morning everyone! I got my flu vaccine this morning. Now I guess I'll wait a few days and see if I get sick from it, lol.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-14 07:26:00
Middle East and North AfricaSuspended from Work
QUOTE (Jomo @ Oct 14 2008, 07:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The norm is that you lose your health insurance and any unused vacation days if you are fired. However, there are some companies that are decent and will allow you to work out a deal with them. I hope yours is one of those.

As you said, "in this economy"......don't you think it would be better to find another job before you quit this one, if given the option? Can you afford it if it takes you a long time to find another job?

I wish you luck in your search.



If she is fired, can't she collect unemployment though? That is better than nothing.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-14 07:57:00
Middle East and North AfricaSuspended from Work
I'm sorry to hear about your job. I hope you get it worked out. Medical insurance is definitely a concern these days with how expensive it can be.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-14 07:45:00
Middle East and North AfricaVISA APPROVED!!
This is such wonderful news. I am so happy for you. Inshallah he gets his visa and is on his way to be with you soon. Keep us updated! My husband will be interviewing in Amman in a few months so I like to get an idea though I know each case is different.

kicking.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-15 18:12:00
Middle East and North AfricaWould You Move to ME/NA?
I think it is obvious why I don't live in my husband's counry and why he doesn't either for that matter, lol. He can't even get a visa to anywhere else at this point or residency so we live in fear of him being forced to go back to Iraq before he gets his visa to the US. I will say this, I love him so much, if they don't let him into the US, I will live wherever he does (but only as a last resort, much better for him to come here).

We have discused that if things get better in Iraq after, say, 20 or 30 years then maybe we will go back there. Another idea is after he has US citizenship if we really want to go to the middle east then it would be easier for him to get work as a doctor than it is now with Iraqi citizenship. All the hospitals over there take advantage of Iraqis being desperate. The best deal he could get in Jordan was to work as a doctor for free. Most hospitals in Jordan charge Iraqis $100 a month to work in the hospitals which is crazy, but they will lose their skills if they don't work. Syria wouldn't let him work in the hospital at all. One would think they could use doctors more over there, but I guess not if they are Iraqi.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-17 00:17:00
Middle East and North AfricaFriday is finally here!
Happy Friday!!! I am so tired I am about to go to bed, but I hope everyone has a great day.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-17 00:19:00
Middle East and North Africaevery one who went through Amman
Hopefully those of us waiting to have our interviews will not have any delays or problems and it will go quickly and smoothly for all of us.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-12 23:23:00
Middle East and North Africaevery one who went through Amman
I just sent in the final papers to NVC yesterday so it is a little while longer until I know how Jordan will be, but I will put an update when I know.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-12 00:52:00
Middle East and North AfricaIt's Caturday
QUOTE (amal @ Oct 18 2008, 08:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
rofl.gif

laughing.gif



rofl.gif


sorry, i just had to



OMG Amal, that was too funny. I just got the picture off of some chain email and didn't bother to caption it, but you did a way better job than I would have!

laughing.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 21:22:00
Middle East and North AfricaIt's Caturday

S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 14:45:00
Middle East and North AfricaIt's Caturday
QUOTE (ME~n~HIM @ Oct 18 2008, 01:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think I have done enough housecleaning and laundry preparing for my husband to return today. He's been gone a month and it's *time* for him to come home! kicking.gif kicking.gif kicking.gif Gotta run to the store, prepare something in the crock pot, shower & dress and head out to the airport in a couple of hours to go get him! wub.gif wub.gif wub.gif



I'm glad you will be with him again soon! Have fun getting ready for his arrival.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 13:59:00
Middle East and North AfricaIt's Caturday
I just called NVC to check on the status of my husband's case. I sent the DS-230 and AOS on the 10th. When I called on the 14th they said he had a new case number for Amman, but I marked all the documents with the old case number. I hope this doesn't mess things up. When I called today there is no information on the new case number, but when I enter the new case number it says the recieved the DS-230 but they are waiting on the AOS (they came together, lol). I am thinking that is a false RFE? I may call again on Monday to check the status with an actual operator. He still needs his name fixed as NVC changed it from what it was on the immigration application and I still need it changed back. They have to make everything difficult, lol.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 12:35:00
Middle East and North AfricaIt's Caturday
Happy Saturday MENA! I'm so excited on Monday I get the keys to a nice house I found to rent. I am so tired of this small apartment and I'm looking forward to all the extra space. I showed my husband the pictures of the house and he likes it too. He is just nervous that there are woods behind the house and that someone could "hide" there and sneak into the house. I keep telling him he watches too many scarey movies, lol.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 12:01:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrom The Iraq War, A Troubled Romance In America
QUOTE (cindishah @ Oct 18 2008, 03:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (S and S @ Oct 18 2008, 03:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (cindishah @ Oct 18 2008, 03:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They both sound like wing nuts..ptsd peoples shouldnt really be having babies...



I think that is going too far. That would be saying all people effected by war shouldn't have babies. The point is to treat them so they can safely have children. Many people who have PTSD already have children so that wouldn't work anyway.



Yes but thiers was most recent PTSD...the kids are in good hands now. They will have to get over it..maybe she wont. He has home support advantage..and better frame of mind. and in his part of country is very very family oriented..maybe there is help..soundsl ike she has lost it truely!! and is prob not indicative of all immigrant women. as readers might assume.



From the sounds of it, her problems started before she even met him and just grew. Doesn't sound like being back home with her family would help either. She definitely needs help. That much is clear. These kinds of cases are truly sad.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 15:51:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrom The Iraq War, A Troubled Romance In America
QUOTE (cindishah @ Oct 18 2008, 03:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
They both sound like wing nuts..ptsd peoples shouldnt really be having babies...



I think that is going too far. That would be saying all people effected by war shouldn't have babies. The point is to treat them so they can safely have children. Many people who have PTSD already have children so that wouldn't work anyway.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 15:44:00
Middle East and North AfricaFrom The Iraq War, A Troubled Romance In America
I hate when they post stories like this. You know only bad stories make for interesting reading. It is like another case I read about where the soldier married an Iraqi woman. Things went fine for him, but he stayed in the Army. They had a child together and he had her here in the states, but then he got deployed to Iraq again. On that second deployment to Iraq he was killed and now the Iraqi woman is left alone with their child here, so sad.

There are other cases that things have gone fine and I know of one besides mine personally. I showed my husband this story and he made a good point. If the person is not respected and acting well in their own country, you can't expect them to be good in yours. I think he is right as this case in the story seems to hold true to that.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-18 12:39:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
QUOTE (brnidokiegurl @ Oct 19 2008, 04:36 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
some parts of vj we shovel everyday rofl.gif



lol, so true............
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 16:56:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
QUOTE (brnidokiegurl @ Oct 19 2008, 02:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE (star_dragon @ Oct 19 2008, 01:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Holy #######! Ben Franklin is standing next to my desk! blink.gif

I'm serious. Guy dressed as Ben Franklin and people are asking him questions about life in the 1700's.

He's wearing white tights too!
tongue.gif


ummm do u need some more coffee rofl.gif




Maybe she had too much!
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 15:01:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
QUOTE (star_dragon @ Oct 19 2008, 02:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ohh..yes, I took some fallie pics last weekend and posted them on my facebook...here's one from the park by my house




Oooh, that is beautiful!
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 14:33:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
QUOTE (Turia @ Oct 19 2008, 02:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
HI!! Just came back from 4 hours at the Masjid! WOW! What a morning! It was interesting the two classes i am attending. Now its time to think about doin some work around this house. I've been kind of sluffing off all week and my house is a mess. I get into those moods once in a while, but i've been suffering from allergies and sinus all week too.



Thats great you are attending classes. I hope they help you in figuring out what is best for you. That sucks about the allergies, hopefully you get better soon rose.gif
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 14:28:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
QUOTE (brnidokiegurl @ Oct 19 2008, 02:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
nice trees to look at, i got one in the backyard



lol, Oklahoma City is not known for its trees, lol.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 14:22:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
Colors are starting to change around the house I'm moving to, but not fully yet. Here are some pics:






S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 14:10:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
I don't need flavored creamer, it can be plain, but I must have my creamer. You know what is really good is the refrigerated liquad flavored creamers. I rarely buy them, but they are good!
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 09:34:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
hmmm, coffee for me too! I use a lot of sugar like they do in the ME, but I'm also a creamer user like Rajaa
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 09:24:00
Middle East and North AfricaSunday
lol, happy Sunday! For some of use though, Monday can be a good thing as it means possibilities for good news. The day I can hate Mondays totally again will be a good one though.
S and SFemaleIraq2008-10-19 02:50:00