biggish data

QUOTE (chaishai @ Jul 25 2008, 08:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 25 2008, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (LuLu @ Jul 25 2008, 08:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hi everyone, i just got approved. My 130 only, but hey I'll take it!

Woo Hoo!!

(I'm dancing entirely too much today lol)

I'm tired and hungry.... we had couscous after jumu'ah and then went shopping for a while.... I've got some sauce left over from lunch so I think I'll make iftaat (thareed) {{{{ again!! }}}} that's my new favorite dish

I'm making eggrolls for a sisters meetup tomorrow afternoon and I'm trying to decide now if I want to mix everything and roll them all tonight so all I have to do in the morning is fry them or if I'll just wait and do it all in the morning..... it's hard to predict if you'll be more or less lazy in the day to follow!

make them tomorrow after coffee u will have more energy.
i do all of my hard work between 6-9am, it all goes downhill after that.

You are the opposite of me. I have the most energy between 9pm and midnight. So annoying since it doesn't go well with my work hours!

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 25 2008, 08:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 25 2008, 08:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Eggrolls, that sounds good!

My husband likes them too... which is saying a lot since he doesn't like Asian food and complains a bit if I cook it too often. When I went to buy the eggroll papers I picked up two packs (50 sheets) and he was like "you're not making any for us?????!

" so I got two more packs.... that's 100 eggrolls I get to hand roll.........

How do you make them if you don't mind an explanation. That really does sound good. My husband isn't here yet, but inshallah he will be here soon and I want to have lots of different things for him to try.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 20:40:00

QUOTE (anitacastillo @ Jul 25 2008, 08:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Happy Friday all!!!

Came home to the best news - husband's EAD!!!!

This weekend's plan --- job search game plan for him. He has some initial contacts --- we'll see if any pan out.

Any suggestions about combating fruit flies (think that is what they are)? I'm not excited about a bunch of chemicals in the kitchen, but even with a closed garbage there are lots. I guess I could have hubby take out the garbage more often.

Peace and love--- counting my blessings!!

Congrats about the EAD! Glad he can move on to finding a job. I'm sure waiting to work wasn't easy for him.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 20:34:00

Eggrolls, that sounds good!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 20:20:00

QUOTE (LuLu @ Jul 25 2008, 08:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hi everyone, i just got approved. My 130 only, but hey I'll take it!

Congratulations!!! That is great news. I hope the rest of your journey goes quickly!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 20:01:00

I've walked/driven by the Cheesecake Factory many times, but I never went in. No idea why not. Just never did. I used to love cheesecake, especially with cherries on top. Unfortunately after I became lactose intolerant I couldn't handle it anymore. It started making me sick so now I just take a bite or two whenever it is around

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 19:58:00

ANOTHER OMIGOD OMIGOD

QUOTE (Jenn! @ Jul 25 2008, 08:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (zawjatsaid @ Jul 25 2008, 05:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Im so exicited I couldnt finish my lunch.

What!? I don't think I've ever been *that* excited.

Congratulations!

lol, I don't eat a lot, but I certainly never have the mood to not eat. I love food no matter what my mood is.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 20:44:00

ANOTHER OMIGOD OMIGOD

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 16:57:00

Who should Egypts next President be?

Not sure about Egyptian presidents, but I sure wish we could get a decent Iraqi president. I'll have to follow the Egyptian choices though. I will be curious to see who takes over next.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-25 21:43:00

Happy Sunday MENA!

QUOTE (Lost in NY @ Jul 27 2008, 10:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 27 2008, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I was surprised to see how far the Saturday thread got. I didn't expect that show or response when you, julianna, and I were posting about babies the other day. Thanks for not taking offense and having the patience to address my questions. That is what I admired so much in my Husband as well when we'd have lengthy conversations concerning his religion before we ever had thoughts of marriage.

I agree that patience is the way as religion is a sensitive subject - thank you ladies for bringing your perspective to balance out the cat fights that we usually see around here...

I appreciated your support!!!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:44:00

Happy Sunday MENA!

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 27 2008, 10:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Not a problem. I am thankful others did the same for me. I'm also glad your husband is patient and explains things for you.

It is amazing how one comment can cause a thread to just keep going like that though! lol

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:41:00

Happy Sunday MENA!

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 27 2008, 10:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It is so beautiful outside. It's that pink/purple/blue getting to the twilight hour.

I think the Sunday thread got abandoned in favor of the argument going on in the Saturday thread, lol. Good of you to keep it going Olivia!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:31:00

QUOTE (Virtual wife @ Jul 27 2008, 11:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I would like to remind those who have forgotten that honor killings were the law in the US until the 1970s. A man could kill his wife for having an affair with no penalty (altho the reverse was not allowed). A men could rape his wife and there was no crime in that. That was struck down in a shocking court verdict. Women in the US were routinely considered to be an appendage of their husbands until the early 1970s, unable to obtain credit, own property, or work in many jobs. They could be fired for getting married or pregnant. This was during my lifetime.

Very good point

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 23:23:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 10:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 10:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You know what I love about America? I love that if a woman choses to be conservative, we know she does it because she wants to. No one is making her be that way. You can't say that about most middle eastern countries. Many women are conservative there only because the law or their families force them to. If its not in your heart, it doesn't really count.

What's great about America is you can spend years teaching your children to be modest and righteous and all they have to do is walk at the door and into their school to unlearn everything you've taught them because no one holds the other ppl around them accountable for their immodesty like they do in conservative muslim countries.

My family has had many women who grew up conservative and waited until marriage for their spouse. They were surrounded by the same things as everyone else. They went to public schools, grew up in non-conservative neighborhoods, etc. Yet they didn't follow the examples they saw around them because their parents were careful with them, not threatening, but disciplined in the right way. Their parents set good examples for them and supported them. The best people can have one bad apple out of their kids, but if all of a person's kids turned out bad. That reflects on the parent, not the society.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:52:00

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:39:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 10:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 27 2008, 09:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

ganja, next time can we just get the cliff notes version?

I enjoyed the read.

QUOTE (Virtual wife @ Jul 27 2008, 10:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

May we all be rightly guided.

Ameen.

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 10:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 10:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 09:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You got to love a country whose president uses young, beautiful, virgin women to guard him and one has even died saving his life. Here is a link with a pic of some of his guards. If Charles could be so kind and post the pic I would appreciate it.

http://www.google.co.../...=image&cd=1

I'm not sure I follow.... are you saying that women in Libya shouldn't have the same right to have the same job in secret service as a man or is it that you think they should be deflowerd before they'd be able to do the job effectively?

Are there no women in the secret service in America?

I'm saying I find it highly suspect that he has this many beautiful female guards around him all the time because he wants "equality". The fact they all wear make-up, do their hair and nails. These are not characteristics an Islamic nation would want to showcase to the world, at least in my opinion.

Perhaps he's trying to counter the negative image the world has cast on him by showing that women in his country are free to act unislamicly if they so choose

Nonetheless, the majority of women in Libya do not look or act like that while the majority here do so Libya still wins in that regard.

Maybe the president of Libya just enjoys beautiful women and doesn't trust men

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:34:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 10:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 09:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Are there no women in the secret service in America?

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:27:00

QUOTE (Ganja_Girl @ Jul 27 2008, 10:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Amensty International is not a American thing, it is INTERNATIONAL, they are a watch dog for human rights and countries who violate those human rights. They report on America also, so they have no reason to lie, educated yourself please.

Amnesty International is a worldwide movement of people who campaign for internationally recognized human rights for all.

Our supporters are outraged by human rights abuses but inspired by hope for a better world - so we work to improve human rights through campaigning and international solidarity.

We have more than 2.2 million members and subscribers in more than 150 countries and regions and we coordinate this support to act for justice on a wide range of issues.

I donated to them last year!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:12:00

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 27 2008, 10:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 09:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thanks!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:10:00

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 27 2008, 10:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 08:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I learn something new everyday, but sorry I don't see where the article says they are virgins.

http://www.expressin...-guards/249074/

It didn't have a pic so I used a different article.

Edited by S and S, 27 July 2008 - 10:06 PM.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 22:06:00

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 21:54:00

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 27 2008, 09:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

ganja, next time can we just get the cliff notes version?

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 21:51:00

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 27 2008, 09:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 09:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Ganja_Girl @ Jul 27 2008, 09:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

THE ISLAMIC REPUBLIC CONDEMNS A 13 YEAR OLD GIRL TO STONING
By Safa Haeri Iran Press Service

I plan on moving to Libya, not Iran..... why don't you post something about Libya?

done!
link

"According to the U.S. Department of State’s annual human rights report for 2004, Libya’s authoritarian regime continued to have a poor record in the area of human rights. Some of the numerous and serious abuses on the part of the government include poor prison conditions, arbitrary arrest and detention, prisoners held incommunicado, and political prisoners held for many years without charge or trial. The judiciary is controlled by the state, and there is no right to a fair public trial. Libyans do not have the right to change their government. Freedom of speech, press, assembly, association, and religion are restricted. Independent human rights organizations are prohibited. Ethnic and tribal minorities suffer discrimination, and the state continues to restrict the labor rights of foreign workers.In 2005, the Freedom House rated political rights in Libya as "7" (1 representing the most free and 7 the least free rating), civil liberties as "7" and gave it the freedom rating of "Not Free," although the organization itself has been criticized as politically slanted. See Freedom House#Criticism"

I want to live there too now!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 21:43:00

QUOTE (Staashi @ Jul 27 2008, 09:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 09:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Staashi @ Jul 27 2008, 08:43 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (LaL @ Jul 27 2008, 08:53 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Staashi @ Jul 27 2008, 07:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 08:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I don't need a visa.... I am a citizen.
I am not free to leave..... since you don't know me or my situation you are welcome to keep your opinons to yourself.

I don't know your situation, but unless you are imprisoned, you are free to leave. Furthermore, you can renounce your US citizenship at any time. It can be done.

If you'd like to do it, it can be done. Good luck!

Some people are parents here with shared custody. Free to leave is a loose term.

If the sentiment is strong enough, as it appears to be, some people will renounce their custody to their children and leave their country of birth - it has happened.

Yet another wonderful part of American culture? The abdonment of children?

I am not condoning abandonment of children - if one felt comfortable enough with the children's other parent having sole custody then they should do what needs to be done. Actually, in my religion (Catholic) you don't abandon your spouse or your children, as divorce is not permitted. You're with your spouse until you die.

Furthermore, it has been very interesting on this board, as I've read of certain spouses who have children that they will be leaving in MENA countries with their mothers...they are Muslim...it cuts both ways.

Good point!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 21:35:00

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 08:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (babyeshell @ Jul 27 2008, 08:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

My Kitties

What totally precious babies! What are their names?

I agree, those kitties are adorable!

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 20:53:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 02:04 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (ta me go hiontach @ Jul 27 2008, 01:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 11:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 26 2008, 03:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (ME~n~HIM @ Jul 26 2008, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 02:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ya I
I wonder why you'd marry someone who follows a religion you hate? Oh well.... Que Sera, Sera!!

I wanted to correct that too! There's so many times I want to correct typos/misspellings that I see on here (cuz I'm ####### abt that stuff when it happens repeatedly).
Good question..........

Does that help answer the question. Do you muslimias seriously believe I hate Islam because I question it? And why doesn't anyone answer those questions for me about the several wives & beating wives acceptance? Everytime I bring it up it becomes a moot point on here. What I don't understand is how someone who isn't raised that way comes to accept those beliefs?

i don't get what the above has to do with islam. none of the prophet's multiple marriages were ever out of lust, or to keep him from having an "affair". not that he didn't feel genuine love and affection towards the women he was married to, but the marriages were born out of those women's need to have a husband to help support them when there was a shortage of available men because of war, etc.

No, not all of his marriages, or the multiple marriages of the sahaba, were for that reason.
Nonetheless, I'm not saying that's the reason for a man to have more than one wife.... what I'm saying is that the culture that prefers the evil over the righteous shouldn't be used to judge the laws in Islam.

I've heard of lots of cases of adultry in the middle east. I found it to be as common as here in America, just better hidden. Even the drama shows in Arabic include issues of adultry. The advantage of marrying multiple women doesn't seem to help the middle east at all.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 14:51:00

QUOTE (Nagishkaw @ Jul 27 2008, 08:14 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Interesting that the Bible was brought up.

2 Cor. 11:3-4: 3 But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning, your minds may
somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ. 4 For if someone comes to you and
preaches a Jesus other than the Jesus we preached, or if you receive a different spirit from the one you received, or a different gospel from the one you accepted, you put up with it easily enough.

You know that is going to start a fight Nagi. I'm just sad I have to now and might miss it

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 09:21:00

QUOTE (Maggie724 @ Jul 27 2008, 01:25 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You two sure changed gears in a hurry. From angry posts about the rights of polygamy to marrying cute cats...

I couldn't help myself

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 01:28:00

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 01:20 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 12:13 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I love cats. Your sound like they are full of personality. Manfusha will lay with me in bed for awhile at night, but she has taken to sleeping under the bed for part of the night as well. She only sits in my lap if I'm at the computer or laying with a blanket on the couch. She only lays on my chest if it is morning and she is hungry, lol. Which also includes meowing and purring loudly with some claws digging in to be sure I got the point she is hungry!

Me too! I got 2 cats when I was 3, and then after one litter they were fixed and we homed all but one baby.. so then we had 3. I had these three into high school and college and then I got my own cats. Even Ammar likes my cats, although he tried to not like them and was scared of them at first. It was a trying time. Now he can touch them and everything, and I KNOW he and Belfry are friends. Belfry sits in Ammar's spot on the couch and loves all over his stuff. I caught him speaking Arabic to the cats and looking out the windows with them, petting them, and giving them some treats. Yep. Now to convince him that they are moving to Jordan. I don't think it will be a hard sell at this point. I asked him if he would eat them the other day, when I was talking about starving and he said "No! that's like eating your friend!" So we're more than halfway there! Cause I'm not leaving them behind!

Oh, that is good. I had told my husband that the cat comes with me wherever I live. He is dealing with it, but at this point he has only seen her on camera.

As for eating a cat, he can't, muslims can't eat any animals that eat meat. I always reassure myself with this when my husband threatens my cat because he is jealous she gets to sleep with me, lol.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 01:24:00

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 01:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 27 2008, 12:04 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

My current kitty tolerates me holding her for about 5 to 10 seconds depending on her mood, lol. She hasn't been around kids much so they scare her. She does play fetch with toy mice so she has that in common with one of your kitties.

Some cats don't like to be held... I've always had cats that mostly do like to be held or will at least sit on your lap if the conditions are right.. Puddles will only sit on you if you have a blanet in yuor lap. he will also go under the covers to sleep by your legs if he can.. but hold him and he won't stand that for a second. Belfry has to be in the mood for it, thus the whining. But Ptolemy would live inside you if he could. He also loves to play tag. he'll chase you and tap your achilles tendon and then turn adn run and let you catch him, then he'll chase you... etc.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 01:13:00

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 01:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 26 2008, 11:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That is too funny! Yet so cute. Its hard to find a good cat that will put up with that.

Yeah, I gotta go to bed soon. I need to be up in about 6 hours.

Sigh. Well have a good, but boring night SLEEPING instead of keeping us late-nighters busy!

Yes, he was a really nice cat. I have one with the exact same disposition now too, and another one which loves to play fetch with toys, and my third one whines until I carry him like a baby everywhere I go.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 01:04:00

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 12:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 26 2008, 11:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What??? You don't support animal marriages?

What if my nice kitty wants to get married and do things the right way to a nice male kitty? She will be out of luck. Then again, I had her spayed so she can't do much anyway

LOL! I meant human and animal marriages.. like if you wanted to marry your cow. Having said that, when I was 3, I decided to marry my cat. I got my mom's wedding veil, grabbed the poor cat like 3-year-olds do in that awkward way nice kitties just let the kid do where it's stretched all to heck and arms are every which way... and I told my mom I would "Be right back! gotta get married!" And I ran outside to the rose arch with him and her veil on my head and her shoes which were HUGE... I wore a stunning sailboat sunsuit with my wonder woman underoos, and then I yelled out "I do!" and said "This sucks! I forgot the rings!!! But I love you forever anyway" and then I ran back inside with him (he was still lettting me hold him) and set him down and told my mom I was married now, and that I could have as much cake as I wanted whenever I wanted because that's what married people do.

ETA: Oh.. so you're going to go to bed early on us tonight?

That is too funny! Yet so cute. Its hard to find a good cat that will put up with that.

Yeah, I gotta go to bed soon. I need to be up in about 6 hours.

Edited by S and S, 27 July 2008 - 12:56 AM.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 00:55:00

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 12:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 26 2008, 11:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

it don't even get support from the gay rights crowd here on vj. not even if say two of the 3 are bi-sexual.

Gay rights aren't arguing for multiple partners though, just single marriage. Multiple partners is another form of deviance of the norm. I would think that GR would begin to open the door for alternative marriages though... in that you can say now that the legal precident would no longer define marriage as between one man and one woman... but it would probably be rewritten to be between TWO consenting adults (thus shutting the door on polygamy.) I am surprised, though, that one cannot make a social contract that is not called a marriage legally, between multiple partners-- you do it in a will all the time. I think the issue becomes more when you deal with things like "next of kin" and all of that which is one person and then trying to regulate multiple partners. I don't know? I'm not caring about either one getting passed so I'm not out to argue why it could be done

those are just the problems I see with it. it's like I don't condone marriages of underage people or animals either, and I see one of the basic impediments being they cannot enter into a contract legally because of their mental development as a logical issue. I still am not concerned with trying to legalize it so I'm not interested in figuring out the whole hows and whys. I do find it socially interesting that it is so reviled in our culture.

QUOTE (Nawal @ Jul 26 2008, 11:34 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

BTW---behaviors that happen here in the US happen just as frequently in other countries...just society in these countries choose to ignore it.

Or hide it better

What??? You don't support animal marriages?

What if my nice kitty wants to get married and do things the right way to a nice male kitty? She will be out of luck. Then again, I had her spayed so she can't do much anyway

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 27 2008, 12:46 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 26 2008, 11:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Oh, I'm here, I just decided to sit this one out. I think I'll just watch this on for now.

You were right though! lol

You going to be up late tonight again?

I have to be up early tommorow. A friend of mine is flying to Iraq to see her family and I promised her a ride to the airport.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 00:48:00

QUOTE (Nawal @ Jul 27 2008, 12:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

S and S...where are you? I told you it was early before and only a matter of time...LOL

BTW---behaviors that happen here in the US happen just as frequently in other countries...just society in these countries choose to ignore it.

Oh, I'm here, I just decided to sit this one out. I think I'll just watch this on for now.

You were right though! lol

Edited by S and S, 27 July 2008 - 12:38 AM.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 00:37:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 27 2008, 12:02 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (julianna @ Jul 26 2008, 11:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 10:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I see, so righteous men in the bible did things that God did NOT condone..... OK.

Yes.

And I do agree-- extramarital affairs are not preferred in our society any more than polygamy... but.. you do have a point in that it is a cultural familarity moreso than polygamy (or in this case polygyny). That doesn't make it accepted. Both are considered disgusting. I think the latter is met with more revulsion because it is a permanent state of having an affair and you are forced to deal with it and accept it as being just as valid (speaking from the cultural perspective, not from your perspective on it of course. i acknowledge polygamy is the preferred form of marriage across the world, although monogamy is the most practiced due to varying restrictions (like Islam's request of ebing able to support muslitple wives fully-- even if it were something encouraged, it would erquire the man to be of a certain wealth level before he could obtain this status if he was to follow the) rules.

If a man has an extra-marital affair with a woman for 20 years it's OK in the US.... no laws preventing it and even if there are some still on the books they'll never be enforced but IF a man takes responsibilty for the woman he wants to have a relationship with, other than his first wife, and marries her then he's looking at serious prison time. Why is it better in this corrupted society to make whores of women than wives???

Why is it okay for a man to sleep with another woman at all? Yet a woman does not have the same option legally or islamically? I stopped trying to figure that one out.

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 27 2008, 12:03 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

personally, i fail to see see polygamy/polyandry lacks the support gay marriage enjoys in this country.

Good point! That is strange.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-27 00:05:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 11:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (ahmkri @ Jul 26 2008, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry but tht was a really weird post and did not help at all in your argument. You seem like you are rationalizing the hitting and that is sad. ALthough multiple wives were in Bible, it does not mean it was condoned by God...Americans dont "prefer extramarital affairs" but it happens. I'd rather it be that way than be the one to allow my husband to have relations with anohter when I know about it. The latter is more of a fall from grace whereas the previous is an allowance and acceptance of it...anyway or either way it is disgusting. I dont know what your deal is you showcase ur relgion in your signature and now complain.

I see, so righteous men in the bible did things that God did NOT condone..... OK.
I'm explaining what I understand it to mean.
I don't put myself above God to make up my own laws to live by judging by what I prefer or not as I am a human being who is incapable of seeing the bigger picture. God made the laws as He saw fit.
I find American culture of sex, drugs, drinking, stealing and killing to be disgusting.... much more so than a man having more than one wife.
I'm muslim.... the fact that I am doesn't mean I have to be happy when I see my religion forever trash-talked on this forum.

I've found that there is sex, drugs, drinking, stealing and killing in the middle east too, or at least the four muslim countries I've been to. For that matter, I believe those things are in every country on earth. One country hiding its sins better than another doesn't mean its a better country. Don't even let us get started on the exploits of the Saudi Royal family and their exploits and they are supposed to be from the most holy place in Islam of all. All countries have their good and their bad. I try to see both. Yet, I also thank God I am an American and a muslim.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-26 23:52:00

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 26 2008, 11:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 11:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (charlesandnessa @ Jul 26 2008, 11:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

ok, what's a "siwak"

It's a small stick we use to clean our mouths.

so basically, the husband can swat his wife with a toothbrush?

that's not gonna hurt - unless he's got bad breathe.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-26 23:36:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 11:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (S and S @ Jul 26 2008, 11:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 11:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 26 2008, 03:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (ME~n~HIM @ Jul 26 2008, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 02:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ya I
I wonder why you'd marry someone who follows a religion you hate? Oh well.... Que Sera, Sera!!

I wanted to correct that too! There's so many times I want to correct typos/misspellings that I see on here (cuz I'm ####### abt that stuff when it happens repeatedly).
Good question..........

You don't understand about men being allowed more than one wife because you live in america and have been told your whole life that it's bad and wrong when it's not. If you're christian you should know that prophets and other important ppl in the bible had multiple wives so I don't see what the big issue is or why American women make such a huge deal about it. I understand we're jealous.... I am too but it's taken to whole new levels with American women threatening divorce and other such punishments if a man does something Allah has allowed him to do. I'd much rather my husband have another wife than to have an affair but in America affairs are widely accepted while having more than one wife is illegal.... it's a crappy culture that prefers men to have affairs instead of marrying the other woman.

As far as "wife-beating" it's not allowed. Americans love to over exaggerate things and make them seem worse than they are.... this is NO different. Allah says in the Quran that a man can lightly hit his wife if she's unruly and he's tried everything else to bring her to the correct way and failed but even that "hitting" has to be lightly and with something no bigger than a siwak if you know what that is.... it doesn't hurt! And then it can only be done if it would actually help her to realize what she's doing is bad.... if not he'd be better to just divorce her and leave her to her evil ways. The prophet sal allahu alayhi wa salaam discouraged men from hitting their wives many times. I can assure you that my ex-non-muslim-husband had absolutely nothing preventing him from beating me regularly.... and when he beat me it was a true "beating" and not a little slap on the wrist.

Alhamdulillah, please be patient with her. She is not muslim and doesn't understand the differences in religion or culture. Wouldn't it be better to explain Islamic practices in a nice manner where it makes her feel more encouraged to study Islam than to brow beat her. Sure these would have been good questions to ask before she married a muslim, but it is too late for that now. We should support her and encourage her to learn why things are done in Islam they way they are. The prophet (peace be upon him) never spoke harshly to people trying to understand Islam, even if they spoke harshly to him. Please think of the ways of the prophet (peace be upon him) as an example of how to help others in understanding.

I get tired of seeing my religion dragged thru the mud on this forum.

It's old.

I know and I understand that being in a family full of Christians who don't understand. My work environment isn't welcome to muslims either. Mostly though, I try to set a good example and explain parts of Islam that can help people and be useful to them. There have been several times I have talked to people that they actually asked me for a Quran so they might study it because I was patient even during their criticism. I thank God that when I chose to learn about Islam and had things that I didn't like, someone took the time to explain them in a good way for me so that I was encouraged to continue my studies. Without those people, who knows if I would have chosen to revert.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-26 23:25:00

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 11:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Olivia* @ Jul 26 2008, 03:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (ME~n~HIM @ Jul 26 2008, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

QUOTE (Alhamdulillah @ Jul 26 2008, 02:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ya I
I wonder why you'd marry someone who follows a religion you hate? Oh well.... Que Sera, Sera!!

I wanted to correct that too! There's so many times I want to correct typos/misspellings that I see on here (cuz I'm ####### abt that stuff when it happens repeatedly).
Good question..........

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-26 23:17:00

My Husband's Father was Deported Yesterday

QUOTE (LuckyDucky @ Jul 14 2008, 06:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I'm going to chime in, though it's more as what someone once told me about a little bit about human nature. There seem to be two primary ways people can react to a problem, a sympathizer or a fixer. (No idea if these are official terms, just words I pulled out of thin air.) Now, people will fall somewhere in between these two extremes; with the rainbow of people that we have on the forums, everyone will be a little different.

I will say that I used to be a pretty strong "fixer". When someone comes to me with a problem or complaint, my initial reaction is to try to find more information and to provide guidance as to how to fix it. I realize that my advise may not be taken, and that's fine, but I like to analyize problems and try to come up with a solution. That's primarily how I try to help someone.

The "sympatizer" feels that what the person needs is emotional support. They don't offer solutions, but love and sympathy to help bolster the person through their troubled times.

I want to make it clear that I feel neither outlook is bad. It really depends on the person with the problem.

One of my friends would always come to me with problems and I'd say, "Oh, did you try this?" or "How about doing ..." and she finally got fed up with me and told me. "I don't want to hear what you think I should do. I just want you to listen to me and tell me that you understand how I'm feeling." Humbled, I took it to heart, only to have another friend once chastise me because all I would do is listen. She finally had to tell me that she wanted to hear what I thought she should do.

I think most people in this thread are trying to help. I'd like to think most people's intentions are good. I'm new to the VJ community, but there seems to be a lot of nice, caring people who want to help.

Of course, I reserve the right to be fully wrong.

This is just what I've seen through my life and my own interactions with people.

I think you are absolutely correct. There are "fixers" and "sympathizers". The trick is knowing which way to be for each person. You can't force your fixer ways on someone who needs sympathy and you can't force sympathy on someone who wants help "fixing" things. Sometimes we have to be willing to just adapt to each different person and their needs if we really want to help.

S and S

Female

Iraq

2008-07-14 18:34:00