ForumTitleContentMemberSexCountryDate/Time
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Did anyone do anything this past weekend or have plans for the JA Independence Day holiday observed tomorrow?

Kim, how's Duane doing today?
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-08-06 18:56:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
JULIE YOUR DUE DATE IS TOMORROW!!!! How are you feeling? Do you think you're close? Is baby Elias ready to make his grand entrance? How about Michael? Is he ready? I'm so excited for you and I hope for a safe and healthly delivery.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-08-06 15:30:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Trinilad-How cold is it normally in November where you live? Sweater coats are pretty popular here and can be pretty warm; but as the winter goes on that won't cut it. You can always cut out pictures from flyer's, catalogs etc. and show them to her and get an idea of what she likes. Ask her before hand what color, length, if she want's patterns or solids and then ask your daughter to help you find and cut out pictures based on what your fiance said she likes. In October issue of InStyle (magazine) has a nice section on coats although they are all out of my price range. You might have to make suggestions to her though based on your climate.

**edited because I couldn't get the quotes right

Edited by Jamaica to CT, 15 October 2006 - 07:35 PM.

Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-15 19:34:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

My fiance was quite into the clubs a while back. She realized that I was not thrilled about the idea. When she asked me about going, I told her, "You are a grown woman and you have a decision to make. i am not your father telling you what to do. I would prefer you not go and I would not be happy if you did."

:unsure: I'm not sure why you would say this after reading your other posts; which I agree have plenty of really good points.


I think that going to a bar with the boys and shooting the breeze and going to a club with the boys are two different things. I agree that he should have some "alone" time. Some clubs have rep's; bars too for that matter; for being "pick-up joints" and so I would have to say I wouldn't be comfortable with him going there. If he's going to be on the floor dancing in shall I say close contact with women, to me that is inviting trouble. Depending on the type of club you're going to women can be attracted to the "thug appeal", which I don't get the impression that Duane is; and some will be looking for a potential husband or a "nice guy"and some women don't care less about the man's current marital status. I would feel uncomfortable even if I trusted him. Some men can get "bamboozled" without realizing it. On the other hand I know women who don't care if their husbands go to strip clubs on a regular basis without them.

However if he's going there to work as a DJ; or observe how to break into the business-well that is different. Musicians wifes/girlfriends etc. - I don't think I could do it again:no: . My hat goes out to those who don't have a problem with it.

I don't feel that there's anyone's feelings on a matter are "wrong". It's just how you feel about a situation; more than likely based on past expericences or inexperiences(if I knew then what I know now-kind of thing).

Everyone have a great Sunday. It's too cold here in CT, ugh.



My husband is a musican. He plays in hotels and club atmospheres and its okay with me. If he is going to cheat he is going to do it sometime or another. If he wanted to do that he find away around it and nothing could stop that. You just have to trust and thats what we have. I know last night he was playing at a club place until 4am. I know where he is at and trust him. When I come down he hangs out with me all the time and doesn't go play at the clubs after work. I know we live apart right now and its still a little different. I love going to clubs with my girls and dancing all night. Do I get hit on yes but I always stick by my girls or push the guys away if I am by myself at a club. When your passion is music its hard to say good bye to the club atmosphere which you love. I know I love clubbing.

Kim if you trust him I would let him go if that use to be his job and passion before he left once in awhile. I though would feel more comfortable if he had one friend to accompany him. I know it is hard to let him go and you worked all the time to make extra money and then he is spending it. I think I might be upset to with that too.



All the best with your sistuation. This is a hard one.

Take care and one luv

Yes Jax, I've seen your husband in JA. I think it's a little different performing in the JA hotels because they are not allowed to really "interact" with the guests as you know. Although I know that the hotel workers can and do find their way around that if they want to. My father is a local singer and I once dated a gifted musician-groupies threw themselves all over them. I'm not in any way implying that you should not trust your husband; but I know, as well as you do the allure of musicans/entertainers. The temptations they face are unrelenting.

I used to go out with my girlfriends at a local club with a great house band here too when I was married. The majority of us were married without children at that time. We still get together from time to time but with the kids and other family obligations we just don't do it that often anymore.

I would venture to say that while women will dance with each other on the dance floor; I don't know any straight men who will dance together.

Detour from Jax's post-So as I said before; if you're just doing your job working in the clubs or just sitting at the bar that's one thing. But on the dance floor-having a woman sidle up to you; rubbing up all on you with boobies and booty...well :no:

There was a person that I knew really well. Pillar of the community, family oriented, adored his wife,God fearing, church going sort of person. When I found out that he strayed-I, as Maya A. said "staggered under the weight". It (straying) was so subtle that he honestly didn't know what hit him until it was too late.
I so agree that if your SO is going to stray, he or she is going to stray; no matter where they are at. But everyone who does, starts somewhere... No one should ever feel that it could never happen to them.

Of course we should all trust our SO's; otherwise as was pointed out before, why be with them. And of course most can resist obvious advances and not everyone is so "weak" that they will succumb to advances made to them. I get hit on all the time and I surely don't get involved with these men and never have yet; but I'll never say that it will never happen to me.

For some men/women not being "satisified" at home has nothing to do with cheating. It usually has more to do with lack of appreciation. lack of respect, rebellion against nagging, emasuclation(men of course) etc.

Having said all of that- I'm glad Kim and Duane worked it out with a solution agreeable to both.

Good morning everyone! Happy Sunday morning. LOL @ all the sermons. :thumbs:

I am baking Henry his dinner roast (I don't eat it - its soy something). Henry is washing dishes in his calvin klein boxer chones and I am listening to Jamaica radio online - Sunday morning Power & Glory is the best! I love it. Have a great day everyone!

Soy roast??

Sorry for all the rambling in the above post. I'm a little distracted tonight :blink:

Everyone have a good evening.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-15 18:16:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
I think that going to a bar with the boys and shooting the breeze and going to a club with the boys are two different things. I agree that he should have some "alone" time. Some clubs have rep's; bars too for that matter; for being "pick-up joints" and so I would have to say I wouldn't be comfortable with him going there. If he's going to be on the floor dancing in shall I say close contact with women, to me that is inviting trouble. Depending on the type of club you're going to women can be attracted to the "thug appeal", which I don't get the impression that Duane is; and some will be looking for a potential husband or a "nice guy"and some women don't care less about the man's current marital status. I would feel uncomfortable even if I trusted him. Some men can get "bamboozled" without realizing it. On the other hand I know women who don't care if their husbands go to strip clubs on a regular basis without them.

However if he's going there to work as a DJ; or observe how to break into the business-well that is different. Musicians wifes/girlfriends etc. - I don't think I could do it again:no: . My hat goes out to those who don't have a problem with it.

I don't feel that there's anyone's feelings on a matter are "wrong". It's just how you feel about a situation; more than likely based on past expericences or inexperiences(if I knew then what I know now-kind of thing).

Everyone have a great Sunday. It's too cold here in CT, ugh.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-15 07:22:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

As for me and the filing process we just got our interview date 11/02 I am so happy :dance:

:dance: :dance: Congratulations!! :dance: :dance:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-15 05:36:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Let us know how your reunion went Jax. I'm sure you'll have fun.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-14 21:46:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Today I got an after school job teaching 3rd grade two days a week with the after school program. This will help me get money for all this visa work. I was adding the cost up and just amazed on all the work and cost of it all. Not looking foward to it..

Congrats on the new job Jax.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-14 16:20:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Please vote in my poll posted in this forum.

Everyone have a great weekend (F)

Edited by Jamaica to CT, 14 October 2006 - 01:17 PM.

Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-14 13:17:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Hi Everyone,

THANK YOU again for all of your support, advice, suggestions and opinions. I truly truly appreciate it !!!!

After the "coming out of the closet", we had hours upon hours upon hours of talking. This is in NO way shape or form brought us completely back to where we NEED to be......but yesterday he was back to the same ole same ole ...."a" you know what !!!

I am preparing to get my s**t together, try my best to proceed with an anulment. My lawyer friend gave me some really good information and I'll start making the calls on Monday.

Thanks again everyone.

Have a great weekend. It's cold as ......well, you know what here in Maryland !!!!

(L)

Take care Kelly (L)

Michele
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-14 07:59:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers!!!!

Interviewed this mawnin.....I'll let him (L) post his experience ;)

But I'll spread the news We were

APPROVED !!!! My man is coming home ya'll :dance: :dance: :dance:

Congratulations; great news!!

On a good note , Mr. Smith has been approved for his Green Card as of 10/03/06, and is currently working a full time job at Lowe's

That's wonderful. Congratulations!!!

:thumbs: Ditto

Yardies...I entered a poll on the yahoo site. Just thought we could break up the day a likkle bit, stir things up and add a likkle humor. ;)

It's me JillyBean!! :)

:ph34r: Hey IslandGirl ;)
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-13 16:31:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Best wishes to the Savanphil's on their interview tomorrow!!
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-12 18:22:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Kelly- you already know :(

You and I have had some "private" conversations in the past and from our discussions I think you knew where this was headed, but you wanted to give it a chance because of your deep feelings for this man. His level of immaturity won't change at this point and time. You can't keep telling him to shape up or ship out because things will get better once you threaten him but then he slides back to the same ole same ole.

You know what you have to do; I KNOW you're a strong girl. Do what you have to do and do it NOW.

I'm at work now but if you want to PM me I'll get back to you later.

Michele
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-12 08:51:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

It makes my daughter feel uncomfortable to see him without a shirt.

Then he should respect your wishes and your daughters feelings. How your present yourself around adults are one thing; children-especially girls; are entirely another.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Good morning (F) .
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-12 04:26:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)


My man is damn near perfect......I guess I should have knocked on wood :wacko: Cause he showed his assests this evning :blink: So he's going back to JA. So I guess we won't need that info pass appointment to morrow. He's up set cause a week ago I tried to explain that it rude/dispectful to be with out shirt in the house infront of a woman. Anyone else feel this was? Am I crazy? I think of it like having a hat on in church or at the dinner table. So he comes in the house had this weard look on his face, I'm like whats the matter, nutin, I thought to my self you lie. Shortly afterward he went on a tangit about how in Ja they go without a shirt rey, rey, rey. At home with my daughter rey, rey, rey. :wacko: :blink: He's back got to finish later. :innocent:


And this is where that great big ball of patience comes in. Take the "going back to Jamaica" line off the table. Work on the shirt situation a bit cause you really have to. But remember your appointment tomorrow. After it is over.....a cold glass of wine, some good old fashioned loving and this too shall pass. Hey, just one more story to talk about when you are celebrating that 10 year anniversary. Bet it is going to seem very funny then.

:thumbs: You're alright Trinilad ;) . I hope you stick around after your visa is approved; because you give such great advice and comments. Your fiance is one forturnate girl. :yes:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-11 20:09:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Gift ideas for a 25th wedding anniversary (silver anniversary) :help: ??
Thanks

A FRIEND OF MINE WHO HAD A SUCCESSFUL INTERVIEW RECENTLY SENT ME THIS. I AM NOT SURE WHERE SHE GOT IT FROM BUT IT MAKES INTERESTING READING AND I WANTED TO SHARE WITH YOU GUYS WHO ARE PREPARING FOR AN INTERVIEW LIKE MYSELF. A BIT LONG!

Interview Questions
Just giving an answer to an interview question is not enough, it needs to be the answer
the embassy personnel want to hear from you. Going to an Embassy Interview is more
like taking a test than it is an interview. It demands advanced knowledge about the
questions and the corresponding answers you will give. Advance self-preparation is a
must. This book is for those of you about to experience it for yourselves.
The questions listed below as well as the answers are examples of questions you may
experience during the interview. The purpose of these examples is to guide you in your
self-preparation towards your own Embassy Interview. Good luck!
QuestionS

1. Of all the people in the world, why do you choose to be engaged with a foreigner?
Answer: I chose someone whom I will love and who will love me in return. I don’t care
if he/she is from my own country or not. I love him/her and want to spend the rest of my
life with him/her.
Tip: Explain clearly your reason why you choose to be with your fiancée or spouse. If
possible you can also state the good qualities that you find in him/her that give you a
reason why you want to be with him/her.

2. How did you meet your fiancée?
Answer: I met my fiancée when he came to visit me in Ukraine.
Tip: State the specific place where you met your fiancée in person.

3. How long have you been engaged with each other?
Answer: We have been engaged for 6 months now.
Tip: Be honest to tell the answers because if the Interviewer would find out that you lie
about something, it could be an automatic reason for your visa denial. (See below)

4. Do you think in that length of time, you know him well enough to marry him?
Answer: Yes
Tip: Sometimes Interviewers are going to make a follow-up question after you give an
answer. Be sure you are ready to support your answers with facts concerning how well
you have known your fiancée. Including personal facts regarding your fiancée (e.g. birth
date, age, status, etc….).

5. Has your fiancée met your family? What did your family think about your fiancée?
Answer: Yes, my family has met my fiancée in person. They like him because he
displayed good qualities. They admire his kindness and sincerity as well.
Tip: Be honest. Try to be positive in giving descriptions about your fiancée.

6. Has your fiancée been married before? How many times?
Answer: Yes. He/She was married once but got divorced.
Tip: When the Consul will ask you these questions prepare yourself about some facts
that he/she might ask like: What year did he got his divorce? Do you know the name of
his/her former spouse?

7. Does he/she have children from his/her previous marriage/s? If yes, can you please
give the names of the children?
Answer: Yes, they are _________, _________ and _________.
Tip: Be sure to know the names of the children and their ages if your fiancée/spouse
children from his/her previous marriages as this will help the Consul determine how you
know your fiancée and if your relationship is based on total honesty.

8. How does your fiancée earn a living? Where is his/her business based?
Answer: He is a small business owner engaged in sales and his business is based in
Anchorage, Alaska.
Tip: Be sure to know in advance what your fiancée does for a living, where his work is
located, and his income amount.

9. If you are granted a fiancée visa, are you planning to work in the US when you
arrive?
Answer: No. I am going to the US to join my fiancée, get married and stay with him.
Maybe later, I can apply for an Employment Authorization, but working is not my main
purpose for going to the US.
Tip: Be sure to say NO to this question. If you say yes, the Consul or the Interviewing
Officer may have a reason to deny your fiancée visa and require that you apply for a
work visa instead. They might think that you are using the Fiancée visa in order to get
work in the US.

10. Are you planning to study in the US? Why or Why not?
Answer: NO. My reason for coming to the US is to be with my fiancée because we love
one another.
Tip: Say NO to this question. If ever you say yes, the Consul or the Interviewing Officer
may have a reason to deny your fiancée visa and require that you apply for a student visa
instead. They might think that you are using the Fiancée visa in order to get an education
in the US.

11. What is your fiancée’s highest educational attainment? How about you?
Answer: His highest educational attainment is high school and mine is college.
Tip: Be sure you know the answer to this question. Some people forget to ask their
fiancée this question and in the event that they were asked they can’t answer it. It leads
to a doubt in the Interviewer’s mind as whether you really know your fiancée or not.

12. How often did your fiancée come to visit you? When?
Answer: He came to visit me once and it was last January 11, 2004
Tip: Familiarize yourself with the things you did, when your fiancée came to visit you. It
is also best if you can remember the exact dates that he/she came to your place country or
you to his and when he or you returned home.

13. How long did your fiancée stay?
Answer: He/She stayed for one week. It was from January 11, 2004- January 17, 2004
Tip: Be specific about the important dates. These dates should correspond with the dates
on your fiancée’s airline tickets, itinerary and passport.

14. Why do you want to go to the United States?
Answer: To be with my fiancée and get married.
Tip: You should take note that your petition is a Fiancée/Spouse Petition which if
granted would give you the reason to come to the United States to be with your
fiancée/spouse and be married. Do not mention any other reason other than this, as this
can lead the Interviewers to doubt your true reason for coming to the United States.

15. If you are granted a visa, do you wish to stay in the United States and be an
American citizen? Why or Why not?
Answer: Whether you answer yes or No it doesn’t matter but just be ready to support
your answer.
Tip: Before going to the interview, you should give yourself the opportunity to think of
an answer to this question so you will be ready.

16. Do you have plans of migrating to America and petitioning your relatives in your
native country? Why or Why not?
Answer: You have the choice to say yes or No to this question. Make sure you will be
able to support your answer.
Tip: Before going to the interview, you should give yourself the opportunity to think of
an answer to this question so you will be ready.

17. What kind of life do you expect to live when you go in the United States?
Answer: My expectation is that I need to adjust myself to the culture, climate, people
and especially my new family. It may be difficult to relate to people because I need to
learn more American English, since I am from a non-English speaking country.
Tip: Be sure to think about your expectations now. When you answer this question, it
doesn’t mean you have to point out the positive expectations only. Mention the negative
expectations as well. There is nothing wrong with being realistic with what your
expectations of life in the United States might be.

These questions may seem simplistic from an everyday point of view, but many visa’s
have been denied because the beneficiary was not prepared and gave a seemingly
innocent answer, only to find their visa had been denied based on the answers given.
With attention to detail and knowledge contained in this guide, you should do fine.
Congratulations on your relationship and best of luck in your interview!

thanks
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-10 19:14:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

:whistle:

Most of time I feel like our relationship is too good to be true, so good that it's hard to fuss about "little things". I do believe that not relationship is perfect. But I think we come damn near close. I am blessed.



:yes: :yes: Sounds like we married the same man........ :yes: :yes:

Like I said before......Sometimes I think feel guilty because I wish I had more bad experiences to share........We have our share of little fights but overall he is to good to be true........However, I truly know how hard it is to be in a bad relationship though. My son's father was abusive and he cheated all the time. He never worked and sat around demanding things of me. It was miserable and I had bsolutely no sex drive at all.......I loved him and I was afraid to tell anyone or leave him because I was so young and everyone would have said..."I told you so.......blah, blah, blah........"

One bit of advice that I would tell anyone new.....go stay in Jamaica and stay with your fiance at his house in his environment.....try to visit often or stay for long periods of time........meet all his/her family and friends and try to live as normal as possible when you are in Jamaica....hand wash clothes...shower without hot water, live without running water, cook Jamaican food and live without air conditioning. Do not stay at hotels, eat at restaurants and sit on the beach drinking rum punch............this is not realistic and you will be in for a true shock when he arrives....The lust of the great guy with a sexy accent will go out the door when he arrives....he won't know you and you won't know him. The vacation and fairy tell will be over and it will be very hard to try and build a relationship amoungst that kinda stress............

Just my thoughts for the newbies........ :whistle: :whistle:


As always, good advice Kim :thumbs:

I believe that putting yourself in another's shoes is very helpful to help you to be empathic to what they are experiencing now. I grew up in the projects and our family was on public assistance due to my mother's chronic and debilitating illnesses. My father did not live with us; but was in the picture. I have never forgotten where I came from and am grateful to God that I am self-sufficient and able to live comfortably now. In some ways I know the life of people living in under less than humane conditions; although I will not pretend to have been as poor as some of them are. Many Jamaicans truly "rough it" under severe conditions and I would never want to have to experience life daily as some of them do. I have however at one time or another in my life lived under the type of conditions that you have described and it 'ain't no' picnic. In most cases though when they arrive here they more than likely live in better conditions than what they lived in JA. Some adjust well, some don't no matter how much you try to prepare them. In my opinion I don't think it's the material things that are difficult to adjust to; I believe it's the social aspects as well as leaving behind loved ones and that laid back lifestyle. Also getting used to living with someone 24/7 would be a huge adjustment for anyone who is not accustomed to living together.
Nobody should get into any relationship with blinders on and unrealistic expectations. Everyone's expectations and needs should be discussed in depth before moving in with someone. If you don't you'll certainly set yourself up for disappointment and resentment.

No one should feel guilty for having a good relationship :no: .
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-09 18:09:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Good morning yardies family!!

My sister is finally out of the woods and they are talking about releasing her from the hospital......Duane has truly been a very supportive shoulder to lean on during this time......he really amazes me......

Shauna....I am sorry that you are going through this but please knwo that she is in a better place now and you will see her again!! She is shining down on you now and you have an angel in heaven watching over you!!!

It has been very interesting reading all of the recent posts.........I think Trinlidad summed things up extremely well......When I stayed in Jamaica for a month last February, I kinda experienced what Duane feels like. I felt out of my "comfort zone" and had to rely on him for everything......this was very hard and I got homesick fast........I try to keep that in mind when Duane starts going through his anger/frusteration. We talked a lot before he arrived about the culture shock, the expectations of our relationship (including financial) and making sure we had a 50/50 understanding. All of the things Trinlidad mentioned about feeling "less than a man" having the women pay for everything and buy everything is really hard on a man. No matter how many times we talked about it before he arrived, he still tells me that it is NOTHING like he expected. Even yesterday during dinner, we were talking and he said that ALL Jamaicans have a different view of "Foreign" and they need to experience it before they judge. He said....."it is hard to live in Foreign"......"Everyting is sooo expensive and you have to work hard to make any money...."

Respect is very important and the understanding that the relationship needs to be equal is also very important........No relationship is perfect....every relationship has ups and downs!!!! The main point is making sure that you can "work" together to resolve those differences. If someone is not willing to "work" and common respect is missing than the relationship is not going to work no matter how much love you have........ Trust me......I have been through it with previous relationships in the past......

I do feel guilty sometimes because I know that our relationship sounds to good to be true...but we have our little problems too......I am the messy person in our house...Duane fusses at me all the time. He does our laundry and cleans up after me.........But...I try to re-pay him by treating him like a "king" of the castle..... I make him tea and breakfast every morning, cook dinner most evenings.................we try to make things 50/50. He sells his art and gives me all of the money.........sometimes I need to tell him to keep some of the money for himself and he tells me...."no baby.....we have bills to pay!!"

I get pissed at his table manners and his childish ways sometimes but....... I can not be bothered with arguing about it because the good definitely out ways the bad and my life would be lost without him......I do feel very lucky to have him. He is kind and caring and very gentle. If things were different, I would not hestitate to send him back.......I have experienced crappy relationships...my sons father was a big assssss and he treated me very bad......I put up with his s**hit way too long.......I hope you all find the answers you need and everything works out for you........

:yes: :thumbs:

I'm glad to hear your sister is doing well.

Kim, please ask Duane if he can do Dunn's River Falls on a T-shirt. My friend and I made it to the top :dance: :dance: . Out of our group of 20 only 8 of us made it to the top. The others that made it was a family from Chicago with 3 adults and 3 children.

My bed is finally up!! :joy:

I moved to a smaller place and the clearance for the stairs made it "impossible" for the mover's to get my massive frame and headboard up the stairs. It did take 5 guys to do it but it's finally done now I'm up off of the floor. Now I feel like a queen again :P .




I havent posted in a few days, and still need to catch up. I did want to congratulate Eliz and Henry on getting the green card! :) Yayyyy!

Ok, I have a question for all of you, hopefully someone might know the answer. Why are you supposed to "blanch" veggies before freezing???

Lake has a BUNCH of Guyanese spinach (bagi?) we need to pick and freeze this week. He has never heard of "blanching" them. I dont know much about freezing anything, so all I know is that you are supposed to do it. :help: He says his aunt in New York freezes a bunch of it and doesnt boil it first. Heck if I know. He also says she freezes tomatoes after slicing them, without cooking first. Any old timers out there know?

Jill



Hey girl,

My aunt down south has A LOT of bhaji in the the backyard. She also has string beans, tomatoes, peaches, boulanger/baigan (eggplant) and some pigeon peas (gungo peas for you yardies). She freezes EVERYTHING. I will call her tonight and ask her.

I looove bhaji!! Mmmm It tastes better than US spinach.

Jill and Elizabeth-even though my dream job is to be a plant waterer :o , I know nothing about gardening. Last week I was talking to Tristan and he mentioned a "garden egg". I had no idea what he was talking about until I figured out it was an eggplant.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-08 14:10:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

hello ladies and men....i will be heading up to New Jersey today...i will bo gone for a week without a computer :o :blink: so i hope you all have a great week!!

Have a good trip Shauna.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-08 12:01:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Wow I finally made it to the platinum level!! :dance: :dance:

Ok so now how can I change it to what I want to say above those blue dots?

I've got to think of something witty :P .

When do you get a heart? 1000 posts I assume?
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-08 10:25:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Whose next on the interview list?

I believe it's the Savanphil's??
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-08 09:49:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)


If you decide not to marry him and he has to return to JA please be aware that it will be difficult, if not impossible for him to return to his home. I'm sure he will be ostracized and humiliated. He will probably have to live in another area.


I don't agree with this at all :no: Tony would definately go back to where he lived before amongst all his family and friends. If they are your true friends, they are not going to judge you because your relationship didn't work out! He has even talked to his dad about coming back "home" if we called it quits and his dad will help him get his feet back on the ground until he found another job, etc... They might be a little embarassed to admit their relationship "failed" but your family and friends will not "ostracize" you.


That's nice that Tony has a support system like that but some don't. Tristan can't rely on family members to help him until he gets on his feet; he would basically be on his own. As far as the ostracism is concerned I'm really not talking about family or close friends-but the towns people, acquantances and work mates. Several Jamaicans that I talked to have said the same thing; it would be very difficult for them to return to their home town under those circumstances.
The hospitality sector seems like they all know each other even if they work in different hotels. And Tristan is very sensitive.


I am not saying it is right how these men are behaving, I am just saying that it has less to do with some mean spirit on thier part to thier American fiance and more to do with them feeling lost in a foreign country.

I guess we just have to have realistic expectations as to how soon the good days will come . This is not like meeting a man, falling in love and getting marraid. These men are leaving a normal life behind. No matter how bad it may be, it is the life that they know.


So true :yes: I try to put myself in Tony's shoes when I get frustrated with him. I have come to my own personal conclusion that I could not do what he did! I couldn't leave everything I know, my family, my job, etc. and just move to another country where I know ONE person in the entire place :unsure: It is a huge challenge for them. I used to think that he should be happy because he had it so much better here - nice house, nice cars to drive, nice clothes, etc.. - but like you said however bad they had it in JA, it was still THIER HOME :yes:

:yes: :thumbs:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-08 05:01:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

You are correct that no one should be ill treated or should any man/ woman feel they have the right to act out because they are adjusting. I am not saying it is right how these men are behaving, I am just saying that it has less to do with some mean spirit on thier part to thier American fiance and more to do with them feeling lost in a foreign country.

As you said, some people are not cut out for this and no one should feel that they have to take the BS just because they brought thier fiance here. Everyone has to make a judgement call. Rome was not built in a day and some men take longer to adjust than others. You just have to know your limits and when you get to that point, you have to do what is in your best interest.

I guess we just have to have realistic expectations as to how soon the good days will come . This is not like meeting a man, falling in love and getting marraid. These men are leaving a normal life behind. No matter how bad it may be, it is the life that they know. I had a friend who went through this a year ago. Things took some time to work out. She actually admitted it would have been easier if her fiance came with actual employable skills. She got him enrolled in College so that he could actually find a job. Today, you will never know they had a challenging start. Sometimes a lot of Caribbean men do not understand the skill requirements for successful living in the US. Getting a college degree is not a priority there as it is here and maybe you can survive there without it. Being here without a marketable skill is a challenge for a lot of these men. Those people who I knew in my similar situation 10 years ago in most cases were not skilled and that made it hard for them to make a living here. These are some of the things fiance's have to be prepared to address when they are moving here.

I have a fiance arriving here in about a month. I have to make sure that she acquires the skills to be sucessful. She is an elementary teacher in jamaica. Here that does not say sqaut without a degree and we have had to put things in place to address that. Now sure I wish she could come here and walk in a class room and teach. But I have done the homework and I know her teaching options are limited. As a couple we have to come together and deal with that.

They got along great. Took some time, but I could not imagine marrying a woman who had difficulty with my daughter. i was honest with her about that and she understood my concerns there. The time spent was the best thing ever happened. My daughter cried when she came back here after the summer vacation. Had it gone different would I have made a different choice. I think we both would have made that choice cause it was hers to make also.

:thumbs: Excellent points. I'll definitely keep this in mind for the future. I know that I would have to work on making my man feel at home in "my house". I think that you had a good idea about including your fiance in your home decorating. And you are so right about aquiring workable skills/education so that the adjustment will be easier.

I'm sure your fiance will probably get a good job here since teachers are in high demand in a lot of areas. My first exposure to Jamaican culture actually came here in my hometown where they had an exchange program at the local university for Sam Sharp's (sp?) teacher's college from JA. They were told that their credentials and degrees could be utilitzed here in the US but they do have a master's degree. I befriended one of the student's in the master's program who in turn invited me to JA. The rest is history.



Goodnight all. Have a great Sunday!
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-07 20:38:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

I have been reading the messages on this site and I guess I have not heard any comments from any of the men who may be on here and bringing fiance's to the US. Wonder if there are any besides myself.

Anyway, I have the unique position of having come here as the fiance 12 years ago, surviving that experience and now actually bringing a fiance from Jamaica. I originally came from Trinidad, but I guess that as caribbean men all the same our experiences are similar.

Two things I can tell you from my experience coming here as a fiance.

Firstly, I felt less of a man when I came here and could not find a job and had to depend on a woman to take care of me until I found myself. I guess I too adopted that apparently hostile attitude that was more of a defensive thing than it was me just being mean. I knew that my wife at the time expected me to be bringing the bacon home and everytime she looked at me or did anything for me like brought clothes or food or anything, it made me feel like I was a disappointment. So before she had the time to even say so, I got on the offensive so that I would never have to hear it.

Secondly, I realized that we did not really have a realistic plan for what happens after we got the fiance visa. You know the saying visit me and leave with me are two different things. When my American fiance visited me in Trinidad. everything was fine, I felt appreciated, wanted, and the visits were majical. That majic ended when I landed at JFK. This was not a vacation anymore. I felt it the moment I arrived at her home. It wa her furniture, her bed, her food, her everything and I felt like so much a visitor there and never felt like anything was mine.

I say this not to excuse the behavior of the men you all are talking about. And it is not so much of a cultural thing. It is the inability to take care of ourselves that makes us respond with less than an appreciative attitude.

Now that I am the US citizen and preparing for the fiance, I know how she would feel when she arrives here in Baltimore. Over the past couple months I have spent countless hours making this home something welcoming for her. If you walk into my home now, I would have to convince you she does not live here. From the pictures on the walls, to the clothes in the closet and the shoes in the bedroom, to the subtle changes I have had to make to my home so that she feels it is hers. We picked out the new furniture down to the bedspread and the curtains together.

The most I can say to the ladies who are having a challenging time is that if you believe that man loves you and you want him in your life, then be patient. Tell him honestly how you feel, do not spend one minute thinking that you are offending him by telling him he is hurting you. Let him get pissed but you have a right to feel appreciated and he must understand that. But tell him also that you understand how difficult this is for him, how challenging this must be and that you are there for him 110% and would be there for better or for worse.

You cannot begin to imagine the psychological turmoil these men are going through. I used to almost resent my then wife for bringing me here. I was unprepared for this life . America is a hustle. Everyman for themselves and God for us all. You can loaf around in the Caribbean and not work for months and still get a meal and a roof over your head cause that is what family will do for you. That laid back attitude has to end at JFK or whaereever they come in. That is a discussion that a lot of couples do not have early enough. Not saying that you did not. But being open about how much you can afford to support and what your expectations are financially will go a long way with making sure everyone understands that this is not a vacation. Took me a while after I came here to realize that it was not a vacation. Caribbean people or foreigners in general see Americans as prosperous and do not understand until they get here that that good life comes at a cost. The streets are not paved with gold and sometimes it takes a while for them to understand that.

My fiance and I are getting marraid 4 days after she arrives in Baltimore. It may seem rational maybe to say wait and see how things work out before I do. But I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with so her move here is not a trial thing. She has traits that pisses me off and drives me crazy and she knows what they are because I tell her and I have come to the realization that despite those traits, I still do love her. But I could not imagine my life without her. I am a single parent raising a 7 year old who is very territorial. To make that situation work I made my daughter spend Christmas and the whole Summer in jamaica with my fiance.

I am not saying that I have the ideal, and I know I am going to have challenging moments when she arrives. But love has kept us together for 5 years in two countries and love will keep us together over anything that comes our way. I know that most of you who are having trouble felt that way at some time. Look at that man next to you and if you feel that he is not the best thing for you, Call Air Jamaic NOW. But if you still feels that the fire is there, find a way to work through the differences. Being in a foreign country is hard. For you as an American , everything here is normal. For them, everything here is foreign and they feel out of place and a man will do anything to protect his pride and feel like a man. It is as if coming here has stripped them of everything that makes them a man or makes them feel like some body. Until they find themselves they are going to act like asses and drive you crazy. If you expect it to be any different, you are going to be disappointed.

I tell you, I know how they feel and it is going to get worse before it gets better. You just have to know how much you are willing to take while you wait for the better day. People may say otherwise, but I beleive Caribbean men are men whose values are grounded and who make great lovers as they do friends. When your man finds himself, you will have a gem you can be proud of. Either help him find it here, or send him home so he can reconnect with himself once again. After all, this is someone you love once, and still do, and would always want the best for them. Some foreign men cannot survive the pace of American life and you should know by now if your man will. This country is not for everyone!

I have said too much.

No Trinilad you have not said too much. I truly appreciate your point of view as a man who's been in the situation where some of our men are at now. You have certainly hit the nail of the head and offered invaulable advice and insight.

However...I still feel that if a man truly loves you he will not make life difficult for you no matter what kind of adjustments he has to go through. For some of us independent women B) an adjustment like this is extremely difficult for us too. All of us, no matter where we come from or where we've been have probably had to make adjustments in our lives and been put in situations that took us out of our "element". I know I have. Never once did I take it out on my loved ones. In fact if anything I tried to sheild them from the pain, hurt, fear or frustation I was experiencing. To me that was the loving thing to do.

I don't think anyone should throw in the towel so quickly without giving it serious thought and consideration. However let's face it some situations just won't work and never will so there's not point in making the mistake of marrying someone or continuing in a relationship that is detrimental to everyone. Everyone has to come to a solution for themselves and their circumstances.

How did your daughter and fiance make out without you? I do think it's a good idea for those with children to spend some one on one time together. I think it will probably work out with the younger ones but the older kids I'm sure have their own agenda :whistle:



OK--here's one I used to get from my husband...

"Why yuh was' money on dis Kotex ting? Jus wash out yuh likkle cloths"

Nuff said.

Oh no he didn't go there :o Oh my gosh :wacko:


MIGAWD!! :o :no:

:no:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-07 19:50:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

hello ladies...
michele thank you for you kind words and your thoughts!!!
today was a hard day on me and my family...we laid my grandma to rest today and what really got to me was that i will not get to see her again...for the holiday's ect...but i know she is in a better place doing what she does best...teaching the kids.....


Shauna, today and the next few will be extremely difficult, but as time goes on you'll find the sadness and emptiness will be replaced with loving memories. Some days such as holidays or family traditions will be extremely hard when loved ones are not there.

Her suffering has ended. May she rest in peace.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-07 19:27:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

I have been putting together music all day for my chirstmas program. I can't beleive I will be practicing Christmas tunes in a couple weeks. HELP LOL :lol:

:no: Plllezzze don't talk about that now. I'm shivering just thinking about that time of year and the cold :crying: . I've got to relocate to a warmer climate. My car died on me on Friday and the only thing I could think of was 'I'm glad I wasn't stranded in the middle of winter.' But at least it's supposed to be nice here the next few days. I'll take it :) . And where you be then; in Jamica, where it's nice and warm :P . I am so jealous of you and the Squitto's.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-07 19:18:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

I just went to breakfast with my best friend. She said she had been thinking about me a lot. I haven't talked to her about the problems before because - I guess I was embarassed. She told me that she wanted me to be happy - and she would stick with me through anything. But she also said that I deserve more - much more - and she dosen't think I should settle.

You are right about feeling bad because your man left all he knew in JA. I keep thinking of how proud he is and how embarassing it would be for him to go back. I worry about his health, his teeth, and how he will feel going back to a life of such poverty. I love him so very much. But I know that I need to love myself more.

Ever since he came here things have been bad. My house is a mess - my Pergo floors are ruined - by window broke, my small stained glass window ornament is broken... My girlfriend says it is because I am "out of order" (she is referring to God's plan for my life - I am currently living in sin, etc.). I am not overly religious, but I do love God and I totally see her point.

He started his new job today. We went to get him a pair of black pants last night. The guy bought him the Dockers and I told him he should try it on. He was like "I can't boder with trying on nutten now man, believe me...". I told him he really needs to since he is starting the job in the morning and he won't have a seocond chance to find a pair that fits. He sucks his teeth and mutters under his breath and storms off to the fitting room. The salesman looks at me. I look down. I am embarassed - not just in how he treats me, but that I am engaged to a child. :( When we were checking out he starts telling the guy to hurry because he is hungry. And he says: "Me hungry man, believe me, a hungry man is an angry man..." I was like "WHAT"? But I said that in my head because I didn't want to argue and I wanted to get the heck away from the sales man as soon as possible.

Ladies, I barely even want to have s*x anymore. Are you allowed to say that here? Anyway, I certainly won't get into the details - but suffice to say that things are much LESS fun than they were in JA. Not saying things are NEVER fun, but nothing like before.

So I'm here - in a messy house with broken stuff... I've been embarassed in front of a jillion people (my Dad visited from Texas last week and at 7:30 p.m. when we were all watching TV he announces that he is tired and actually lays out on the floor in my sister's house and starts to go to sleep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). The romance is all but gone. And I feel like a fool.

At this point I really think he needs to go back to JA. So why am I having such a hard time just saying that to him? :unsure:

I went to his job today to give him some money and I just looked at how incredibly handsome he is. He was so proud to be working. And he told me the reason he needed money is because he opened a bank account and couldn't take it out today. And whenever I see these tiny rays of hope I think - maybe I should give it more time... maybe I'm being too hasty.... And it breaks my heart to see him and be thinking in my head that I've all but decided not to marry him.

Well - enjoy the rest of your Saturday ladies.......

Take care
T




Is Tristan here on a fiancee visa or a visitor's visa? I ask because you say you may never get married - dosen't he have to go back if you dont?

Tristan is not here. He's still in JA. I have not filed for him yet.

Tali, do you honestly think things will improve within the next month; before your 90 days is up? If so; ask yourself if he is he being sincere about it or if he's doing it just to stay here? I'm not saying you should throw in the towel; only you can decide that. But don't be a doormat either. Please don't ignore any red flags; seriously. You'll only regret it later.

If you decide not to marry him and he has to return to JA please be aware that it will be difficult, if not impossible for him to return to his home. I'm sure he will be ostracized and humiliated. He will probably have to live in another area.

I'm sure that as time goes by some things will settle down and he'll get used to the way things are here. But
as with any person; where ever they come from; serious character flaws are not going to be changed easily, if at all. And for those with children, and especially daughters, you have to set an example for them. I'm certainly not saying they should run or dictate what goes on in the household; however your choices serve as an example for them.

When my mother remarried, me and my brother were terrible to our step-father; simply because he wasn't my father and we had to move out of state. So I'm sure that some of you with children will probably have the same reaction. That's normal. As Dee said things will probably improve over time if he treats you and your children decently.

Tali-Why are your items broken or destroyed?

Even though I'm sitting on the sidelines without a man here; these issues can be universal or local. I'm a "mature" (read- over 40 and experienced ;) )woman and at this point I don't have the energy or patience to deal with immature(at any age), foolish men; nor should I have to.

For any woman or man for that matter, if you're not being treated the way you deserve or want to be treated, then the person you're with is probably not right for you.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I have to work on Monday :crying:



Hey Jill- how are you doing?
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-07 14:38:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Hey Rhonda, hey Shemonya :D

Good morning.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-07 06:06:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Oh boy, OH BOY. You all know that I have to chime in on today's posts. I know some of you may be shaking your heads and saying oh no here she goes again :whistle: .

Before I put my 2 cents in I want to ask Kim how her sister is doing and let Shauna know she's in my thoughts today as I know that she not only lost her beloved grandmother but also was deeply saddened by the sad and senseless deaths of the Amish girls.

Nowww....



To answer Ms. Squitto's question:
I'm an Investor Accountant at a mortgage lending firm. I HATE IT. It is too stressful. My dream job is to be the person who goes from company to company watering plants :hehe: I don't have a green thumb but I think it will be be a stressful job. If I was independently wealthy or able to make ends meet without my current salary I would definently take a job less stressful even if it's not as prestigious sounding as what I do now. I always wanted to be a travel agent when I grew up because it seemed like you could travel all over the world; but I now know that it's not really as glamorous as it seems and I intensely dislike selling. I've always done the safe thing and stayed in my field but I would love to do something where I could make a difference in people's lives. Advocacy would be the field I would go into if I wasn't too poor and pressed for time to go back to school.

Am I the only one who doesn't think that it's a woman's "duty" to put up with any ole BS that some of these men dish out. Yes, I understand that it will take time and understanding for ALL to adjust and yes you have to choose your battles and not sweat the small stuff. The stress of being put into a totally different culture and away from family friends and familarity can cause anyone to get depressed, stressed and cause them to regress. However that doesn't mean that they should treat their women any old way and take out their frustrations on them and make life miserable for them. I don't go into any relationship thinking it's going to be easy; but I do expect to be treated respectfully and fairly. I've been in this relationship nearly 3 years and many, many times nearly ended it because of the cultural differences. I totally agree that if you have not lived 'the culture' that it will be extremely difficult at times and again I agree with Ann where she says it depends on what kind of economic and geographical area or situation they grew up in. Even though I truly love Tristan I may never get married because he knows 'I'm not having it' and he know's that I mean it. I don't think that women should allow themselves to be treated badly for the sake of having a man or putting up with anything beacause of fear of what others may say. I don't believe in coddling grown men. As I said before I may not be married and I may never get married again but one thing I will say is that I did it my way.

Next topic:

ANNA :thumbs: :dance: :dancing:
How very exciting :yes:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-06 20:52:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Driving :help: Lets just say sometimes we drive to the same place in 2 different cars :whistle:

:no: :P
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-05 19:00:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)


Good morning,

I am new to this website and trying to figure it all out. I have some questions on filling out the forms for a K-1 Visa for my fiance coming from Jamaica. Most of my questions are about the form itself, what not to write or how much to write.
Was wondering if i could get some help from someone who has been thru this process already. I am really trying to avoid lawyer fees at the moment if i can.
Any help would be wonderful.

Thanks
Jamaica to US



Welcome Jamus!! :) Ask away we are here to help!

Yes Jamus-welcome!
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-05 17:58:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Hey Jax!! We're coming back on December 29th just before new years. We'll be spending our New years right here in NYC! That's so cool that you're going down as well.


I will also be coming back on the 29th :lol: I am going to spend New Years Eve watching the Bears beat up Green Bay :lol: I have my priorities!!! :whistle:

:lol: :lol:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-05 17:17:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
[quote name='Denden' post='490574' date='Oct 5 2006, 03:04 PM']
[quote name='Minfay' post='490518' date='Oct 5 2006, 01:45 PM']
[quote name='sjb1221' post='490508' date='Oct 5 2006, 01:43 PM'][quote name='Minfay' post='490474' date='Oct 5 2006, 02:28 PM'][quote name='Denden' post='490447' date='Oct 5 2006, 01:23 PM']The male ego while driving!!!!!! Drives me absolutely insane!!!![/quote] Yup, just another reason why Roy DOESN'T have his license :dance: [/quote]:lol: :lol: Damien is getting his license next week :crying: :crying:[/quote]
Oh Boy.....I will be thinking of you!! :lol: :lol:
[/quote]


GET READY. :yes: Now I just sat in the pasenger seat with my eyes closed until we reach, cause I just :yes: cannot deal with it. :unsure:
[/quote]
:lol:

[quote name='sjb1221' post='490631' date='Oct 5 2006, 03:21 PM']
[quote name='Minfay' post='490626' date='Oct 5 2006, 03:19 PM']
[quote name='Denden' post='490574' date='Oct 5 2006, 02:04 PM']GET READY. :yes: Now I just sat in the pasenger seat with my eyes closed until we reach, cause I just :yes: cannot deal with it. :unsure:[/quote] :lol: :lol: That visual is just cracking me up!! :lol: :lol:
[/quote]

I know. I'll rather him drive without me cuz my heart can't take it anymore :crying: My poor car :crying:
[/quote]
My sister in law is the worst driver I've ever seen. She's never had an accident. All the other cars try to stay away from her :P

[quote name='nyseness' post='490843' date='Oct 5 2006, 04:59 PM']
[quote name='Minfay' post='489757' date='Oct 5 2006, 07:51 AM']
[quote name='Belly'sGirl' post='489661' date='Oct 5 2006, 07:40 AM']She also went on to say that someone had recommended her to the site, but she found it basically useless to her[/quote]
That's funny -- I would have never made it through this process without you guys. I guess I can understand that if she came onto VJ and didn't know where "we" were -- it would be pretty much useless to her. Before Mama Squitto gathered us all up and put us in one place it was hard to find information specific to Jamaica. Thank you Squitto!! (L)

[quote name='Jamus' post='489675' date='Oct 5 2006, 08:00 AM']I am new to this website and trying to figure it all out. I have some questions on filling out the forms for a K-1 Visa for my fiance coming from Jamaica.[/quote] Welcome Jamus.....ask away. We are all here to give you any help and support we can. If you want to use a lawyer that is your choice. I was going to when I started this process -- then I found VJ and decided I could do it on my own. We had no problems. I suggest you save your money. :yes:


****************************************
Jamie Baby -- What's Up????? How's school???

[quote name='nyseness' post='488730' date='Oct 4 2006, 04:52 PM']What docs is required to get married in JA?[/quote] Anna -- What's going on? You going down there to get married? Do you have a date? I'm so excited for you!!! :jest:
[/quote]


I'm looking at next month for sure maybe the 1st or 2nd wk of Nov. Just waiting to get the necessary docs to my minister.

Thanks it's been a long time coming and it's finally here.
[/quote]
Congratulations Anna!! I'm so happy for you :yes: .
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-05 16:49:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

well.....my grandma passes early this morning...and what makes me feel better is that she was not alone one of the nurses at the place she was at was sitting with her...so she is in a better place with the rest of her family that she has not seen in years....i know this is going to take time for me to understand this...today i just do not feel like working at all...i guess i just need to get myself through it!!!

Shuana my heartfelt condolences go out to you and your family (L) .

Squito and I just booked tickets to go to Jamaica for Christmas. I can't wait! :dance:


:thumbs: -If you're living in CT by then maybe you can pack me in your suitcase :hehe:

As for my sister.....she is not doing well...she has fluid in her abdominal lining and it is infected!!!! She is on IV antibotics and if it does not clear up in the next day or so, they will need to go back and do another surgery to drain the fluid. Apparently, this is life threatening so we are taking turns going to the hospital and watching her around the clock..........

My thoughts are with your family too Kim. I hope your sister responds to the antibotics and she doesn't have to go in for another surgery.

Questions:

What docs is required to get married in JA? Is the birth cert the only one? And once you do will I recv the temporary cert ASAP? If so how long will it take for me to recv the original? Will they mail it to me or my spouse?

Also is it true that I have to be in the country for at least 48 hrs after we get married?

Jamaica Marriage Requirements

The information below outlines the marriage requirements for getting married in Jamaica

Visitors can be married just 24 hour after arriving in Jamaica providing prior application has been made for a marriage license.To apply for your marriage license, call our Ministry of National Security at 1-876-906-4908 or visit the Ministry of National Security.

The cost of a license is four thousand Jamaican dollars (approximately US$75-US$80).

Unlike many countries, Jamaica does not expect you take a blood test before getting married. However, the following documentation is required:

* Proof of citizenship - certified copy of birth certificate, which includes father's name.
* Parent's written consent if under 18 years of age.
* Proof of divorce if applicable (original certificate of divorce).
* Certified copy of death certificate for widow or widower.
* Italian nationals celebrating their wedding in Jamaica must notify their embassy and a certified copy of their marriage certificate forwarded to their embassy to be legalized and translated.
* French Canadians need a notarised translated copy of all documents and a photocopy of the original French documents.

There are non-denominational Marriage Officers who can officiate either at their offices, in their homes or at a place chosen by the couple, and are able to provide witnesses. Marriage Officers charge anywhere from US$50 ? US$250.
Registrars Offices

The registrar's office should be contacted for specific rules regarding planning your destination or beach wedding in Jamaica. They will also provide information regarding marriage licenses and marriage certificates.

The Ministry of National Security
Mutual Life Building
2 Oxford Road,
Kingston 5
Jamaica

Tel: 876 906 4908

Office Hours: Monday to Thursday 9:00 A.M. to 5:00 P.M. Friday from 9:00 A.M to 4:00 P.M.

Documentation for Obtaining a Marriage Licence

A marriage licence must be obtained from the Ministry of National Security. Let your wedding coordinator or marriage officer get this for you as it takes about four weeks. The following documents must be submitted when applying for the marriage licence:

1. The full names of the bride and the groom (first, middle and last names)

2. The full names of the mother and father of the bride and the groom (first, middle and last names)

3. The originals or certified copies of the Birth Certificates of the bride and the groom

4. The occupations of the bride and the groom

5. If either the bride or the groom has been married before, either death certificate of the deceased or the divorce papers (originals or certified copies)

7. Parents written consent of either bride or groom if under 21 years old.

Edited by Jamaica to CT, 04 October 2006 - 06:47 PM.

Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-04 18:45:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Is this the song Baby Chams sings Ghetto Story? I need to get up to date with my Dancehall Music. :D

I need a trip to Jamaica :crying: !



i have 29 more days till the BIG day and 28 days till i see Mr. Mikey... :D :D :P mr. mikey it just reminds me of Cham's song...


Shauna-
I started to die laughing when I read this in your post......Last June when I was in Jamaica, I asked Duane to play the "Mr. Mikey" song.......he just stared at me with a puzzled look and then he started laughing hysterically......He said...."baby, the song says "ME SAY MIKEY"......and NOT Mr. Mikey"......oh well...I used to say "Bad man Flower....bad man pull up" so I guess I will never get it right...



it has been going on for 2 weeks...first she started refusing to eat and now it is just waiting...i know that sounds morbid but really that is what we are doing...yesterday she was responding to touch and people talking to her...today nothing just sleeping...it is really hard on my mom...she can't stand looking at her and not understanding why she isn't eating....and the lady at hospic explained it to us as her body just shutting down....



I am sooo sorry..I know how hard this must be for you and your family.....I will keep you in my prayers.....



:lol: :lol: It was under his pillow. :luv: He said he just fell asleep and meant to put it on the nightstand. ;)


:lol: :lol: :lol: NO he didn't.........How freakin cute is that??????????? :P :P

:yes:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-04 04:54:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Congratulations to Robert (rncarterjm) who got married on September 23rd!! :dance: :dance:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-03 23:00:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

thanks Michelle....it is a matter of hours...

I know how difficult it is to watch someone fade away. I lost my mom; she died at age 54; some time ago and it was heartbreaking to see her take her last breath. Thinking of the good times we had together brings me some solace.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-03 19:59:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Ok guys I'm in a panic...I was just talking with a lady on another forum who just completed the K-1 process about a 2 months ago...anyway, I was mentioning to her that I planned on going down to the Embassy for Gregory's interview when it's time, and she told me that they WOULD NOT allow me to go in with him...that I would have to wait at the door....she said that he has to show his passport and paperwork...but that the guards would prevent me from going any further....does anyone know if this is true?? I thought that I would be allowed to go in with him during the actual interview? I thought that that's what some of you said? I'm really confused, and I really need some answers...


Did she interview at the embassy in JA? I don't think anyone is this forum who interviewed at JA was separated or not allowed to go in together. If memory serves me right though I believe that one couple was interviewed separately but that was a long time ago. I believe everyone else went in together. I have heard of some embassies that don't allow the petitioner in; but that's not the case in JA unless it's a very recent development.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

My heart (L) and thoughts go out to everyone who is experiencing family illness or loss.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-03 18:20:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)
Boy Rhonda sure is going to be disappointed tonight :hehe:

Hi everyone, just wanted to step in and say hi all the way from ATL. A friend of mine bought a house here w/her husband and moved down from NY. She had her baby shower yesterday and it was great. It's real nice out here and the weather is good too. Not real anxious to head back in the windy city tommorrow so I'm sure you guys can understand. LOL


How do you like the ATL? I considered relocating there a couple of years ago but wasn't really to impressed with the area I was visiting. I was only there for a few days though and that's not really enough time to make an informed decision.
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-02 19:17:00
Mexico, Latin & South AmericaYardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

Lawd - nobody come an chat since 9:30 this morning?? What's wrong? Who didn't go to work today? Who's not feeling well? :lol:

This is crunch week - finals - so I won't be around much. I need to get a new modem so I can log on from home.

I called in sick today :blush: ;) B) :whistle:
Good luck on your finals :thumbs:
Jamaica to CTFemale02006-10-02 17:06:00